Star Gates Crossing

Chapter 5: New Directions

Sam came down the stairs of the Inn looking resplendent in the gown Teal'c had given her. She had never felt so beautiful, or so nervous. She was certain Jack wouldn't be at the party, but for some reason she was still apprehensive about making an appearance.

The Inn was quiet, the party having started over an hour ago. Sam took a few moments just to walk around this dear place. She thought of the evenings spent by the fire talking with Janet as Cassie and Daniel played chess, Teal'c standing guard over them like a careful sentry.

She had decided not to stay past this evening. Despite the way the SGC and all its inhabitance had so thoroughly embraced her, Sam couldn't bring herself to take a place here among them when it meant pushing Jack out. If she stayed Sam was afraid he would choose to stay away. She now knew how much Jack needed these people and this place. Sam still cared for him to much to be the cause of his losing that connection.

She would certainly miss them all when she was gone.

Sam heaved a great sigh. It was almost time to say goodbye, but first she would set all these worries aside and let herself enjoy one last evening at the Gates. Sam put on her jacket and a smile and headed out across the back lawn.

o-O-o

The barn was filled to the brim with people all laughing, talking, eating and dancing. The whole room was aglow with thousands of twinkling lights covering the walls and ceiling. Fresh Christmas trees adorned every corner. The spicy, sweet aroma of hot cider and warm cookies filled the air. Walter was on stage playing festive Christmas music, not so loud one couldn't enjoy a conversation but loud enough to dance to. Siler was beside him fiddling with the sound board. A few sparks blazed out from the panel and Siler jumped away shaking and blowing on his fingers. He was fine.

Mayor Hammond was across the room shaking hands with everyone he passed. Catching Sam's eye he gave her a wink and a smile. She returned the acknowledgement with a friendly wave.

In a corner by the kitchen Vala was making Mr. Woolsey uncomfortable rubbing herself against him in her flimsy Santa baby costume. He was probably trying to inspect her catering arrangements for any health code violations and this was her idea of revenge. Sheriff Mitchell went over, grabbed Vala by the elbow and whirled her around into his arms and carried her off onto the dance floor. Mr. Woolsey was promptly forgotten as she wrapped herself firmly around Cam and they were lost in the crowd.

In the center of the room was Catherine looking every bit the grand dame she was. She had her arms around Ernest Littlefield. They swayed to the music, and smiled at one another like there was not another soul on the planet. He said something that made her laugh and she gave him a peck on the lips.

How Sam wished she could find love like that. Love that endured separation and regret; love that found forgiveness and finally lasting contentment. Sam turned away from the venerable couple before her thoughts could take a dark turn.

Scanning the room she noted Teal'c by the refreshment tables downing Christmas cookies with alacrity. Even in everyday attire there was no missing him, but tonight he had gone all out. He wore a garish green sweater that was a cacophony of Christmas cheer. The front was covered in every possible traditional holiday decoration: reindeer, snowmen, candy canes, wreaths. The sweater was paired with a bright red bow tie, and the whole outfit was topped off with a Santa hat wrapped in colored lights that seemed to blink to the music. Sam laughed inwardly at the sight and thanked her lucky stars Teal'c had far better taste in women's clothing.

Sam was about to go to him when her steps were arrested by the sight of two very familiar friends standing hand in hand under the mistletoe. Daniel bent down and whispered something in Janet's ear. She looked at him with a radiant smile and bright eyes. Then she reached up and took his face in her hands and pulled his lips toward hers. Sam watched with a glad heart as her two dearest friends shared a tender kiss.

Cassie stepped up behind her and caught Sam's attention. Sam turned and hugged the girl with enthusiasm.

"So, when did this happen?" Sam directed Cassie's attention to her mother and Daniel still locked in a warm embrace.

Ever one to share the town gossip, Cassie enthusiastically related all the details. Daniel had come to their house late that afternoon, frantic to speak with Janet. In his own awkward and wordy way he told her that he loved her and wanted her to be his date to the dance and would she marry him. It was all very confusing, but so sweet. Of course when Janet understood just exactly what Daniel was trying to say she immediately agreed to the date and the marriage proposal.

Sam, concerned by how Cassie might take such a rapid change in her own circumstances, asked the girl how she felt about all this. Cassie's response was simple and whole-hearted, "It's about time!"

Sam placed her arm around the girl and gave her a kiss on the forehead. She loved seeing her friends so happy. Then a spot of mischief overcame Sam and she asked Cassie if there was anyone here who had caught her eye.

Cassie turned her head shyly and pointed to a lanky young man with dark curly hair standing over by the punch bowl. "His name is Dominique. We have a couple of science classes together. He's really smart."

"Why don't you go ask him to dance?" Sam nudged Cassie in that direction.

"No. I couldn't." Cassie's eyes widened nervously. "Besides, I can't leave you here alone." But the girl's gaze continued to focus on the boy across the room. It was clear Cassie wanted to go over and speak with him she just needed a little encouragement.

Sam took Cassie by the shoulders and gently propelled her in the proper direction. Cassie looked back at Sam while slowly moving away. "I'll be fine, promise," Sam reassured her, "Maybe I'll go see if Teal'c knows how to dance."

"Oh, he knows." Cassie said.

Sam wanted to know what exactly Cassie's tone inferred, but she continued shooing the girl away, "Go on."

Cassie reluctantly walked across the dance floor and caught the young man's attention. After a few minutes of conversation, Dominique gallantly escorted Cassie onto the floor and they began to move with the music.

Sam was not left alone for long. Jonas Quinn presented himself to her for a dance and Sam gladly agreed. Sam always enjoyed Jonas' company and they conversed easily as he twirled her around the dance floor. He was not an excellent dancer, but he knew the basics—there was probably an Arthur Murray lesson series in the library he had memorized.

Jonas was the principal at SGC High, so naturally the conversation turned to his preparations for the upcoming semester. "Actually, I've been wanting to talk with you about that," Jonas told her. "Did you know Dr. Lee is leaving us?"

Sam didn't know the man very well. She understood he was Cassie's science teacher. "No I hadn't heard that."

"It seems he's been offered some top secret job with NASA." Jonas made no attempt to hide his surprised disbelief at this development.

"Bill Lee?" From what Sam had heard about the clumsy professor she was surprised as well. "I hope they know what they're in for."

"Yeah." Jonas sounded like he was seriously concerned for the future well-being of the planet.

"Anyway," Jonas continued hesitantly, concerned he might offend her, "that leaves an opening in our science department. I was wondering what you might think . . . ?"

"Of teaching science at the high school?" Sam had never considered teaching, but as she said the words something inside her seemed to click into place.

Jonas misunderstood Sam's reaction. "I know it's well below your expertise," Jonas stammered, "but you'd be great at it."

"Thank you, Jonas." Sam spoke with sincerity and Jonas relaxed. "I'll think about it."

"Sure. No problem. I'd just need to know before school starts again in January." Jonas beamed broadly.

They had momentarily stopped dancing and were standing motionless in the center of the floor while the rest of the town moved around them. Before they could resume their own motion a firm hand descended upon Jonas' shoulder from behind.

"May I cut in?" A man in a dark suit stepped into Sam's range of vision. Her eyes widen in disbelief when she saw who was speaking.

"Hi, Sam." The blond stranger with an unusually large head stepped between Sam and Jonas, crowding into her personal space.

"Pete." Sam's voice was barely audible. It took her a moment to fully collect herself, and then she asked, "How did you find me?"

Pete leaned in with a conspiratorial whisper, "GPS tracking on your phone." He winked at her with a grin, "I'm cop."

Sam was quickly moving past stunned and on the fast track toward furious. "That's illegal."

Pete shrugged, "Who's gonna tell?"

The commotion had drawn the attention of the rest of the party goers and the townsfolk surrounded the pair with curious glances and loud whispers. Daniel stepped up to Sam's side, Teal'c also took up position there and glowered at the man who had interrupted their revelries.

"Is this guy bothering you?" Daniel asked Sam with concern.

"Hey, there's no problem here. This is my fiancé." Pete cupped Sam's elbow possessively, "Tell them Sam."

She heard a few surprised gasps from the crowd at Pete's declaration. Daniel just looked at her steadily waiting for her to give him an indication of what she wanted to do. Sam was uncomfortable with where this whole situation was heading. She knew she was going to have to confront Pete eventually, but she was not going to do it in front of an audience.

"It's fine Daniel." Sam not so subtly removed her arm from Pete's grip and led the way toward the door. "Come on Pete. We should talk about this outside."

The assembly parted for them both to pass through. All the while every person in the room was shooting daggers at Pete's retreating back. His brief introduction to the good people of the SGC had not made him any friends. Sam grabbed her coat from the rack by the door and the two of them exited the building without speaking another word.

o-O-o

The night was cold and clear. Snow from the storm a couple of days ago crunched under their feet as Sam and Pete made their way down the path between the barn and the Inn. Sam stopped at the half way point and turned to face the man she no longer wished to call her fiancé.

Before she could speak, Pete tried to take control of the conversation. "Sam, we've been so worried about you. You just quit your job and took off. No one knew where you were. You're dad's been pretty upset."

Sam tried not to let Pete play on her emotions like this, but she was the kind of person who never wanted to cause anyone pain, even her overbearing father who was probably more furious with her than worried about her.

Pete was out of tough cop mode and back into sweet conciliatory boyfriend mode. "If this is about the house and job in Colorado I get it. I should have discussed it with you first. I just wanted to give you a surprise. Something really special because you're so special, you know?"

"I was upset about Colorado," Sam conceded, "but that's not all that's bothering me."

"Whatever it is Sam, we can fix it. Together." Pete tried to take her hands but she backed away.

"I don't think we can." Sam had been afraid to face Pete like this because she worried she might give in and let him talk her into something she didn't really want to do. But standing before him now she found he had no hold over her anymore and she could tell him exactly how she felt. "I want a different kind of life than you do, Pete."

"Are you saying there's someone else?"

Sam was frustrated his mind immediately went to that possibility. Couldn't he believe that she could come to this conclusion on her own? She wasn't driven by the need to have a man in her life.

"No," Sam retorted forcefully. Then she thought of Jack. Maybe there was someone else effecting her decisions. "Not exactly," she added softly.

Pete picked up on her hesitation. "What does that mean? Either there is someone else or there isn't."

"It's complicated." She was floundering now.

Pete continued to press her. "I'm a smart guy, Sam. I mean not your kind of smart, but I could probably figure it out if you told me what was really going on."

Sam shook her head trying to push away the confusion. What was really going on with her? She thought about the last week in this other worldly place. The friends she had made. Janet's steady presence. Cassie's boisterous enthusiasm. Daniel's caring concern. Teal'c's silent support. And all the people who had embraced her and made her a part of their crazy, dysfunctional, small town family.

Sam straightened. This wasn't about running away from her past and it wasn't about her feelings for Jack. "I've found a home here. And, I don't want to leave."

"Sam, do you really think you could be happy in this dinky little town?" Pete knew he was losing her.

"I'm sure. For the first time in a really long time, I know where I belong."

"Sam, if this is what you want, I can look for a job around here." He was making one last desperate bid to win her back. "They've got to have something. Maybe I can be a deputy for the local sheriff."

"Pete." Sam reached into her jacket pocket and held up the ring that she had buried there days ago.

Pete reluctantly reached for it. "I had to try you know. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I guess I always knew it wouldn't work out, but I had to try."

Sam reached up and laid a gentle kiss on his cheek. "Goodbye." She said the word with peaceful finality.

Pete shoved the ring into his pocket. "I hope you get what you want Sam," passing her as he moved toward the Inn he added, "and I hope he makes you happy."

o-O-o

After Pete was gone Sam turned to look into the shadows by a copse of trees. "You can come out now."

A moment later and Jack stepped into the light and onto the path before Sam. "This isn't what you think. I wasn't trying to spy on you."

Sam considered giving Jack the same treatment he had given her earlier in the day when he found Sam looking through the evidence of his own messy life. But the impulse passed quickly. She wasn't a spiteful person and despite all that had happened between them she was surprised to discover that she was really quite pleased to see him.

"Trying to decide whether to join the party?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Jack shoved his hands into his pockets and looked down at his feet while rocking back on his heels. He looked like a lost little boy and Sam's heart melted.

"Come to any conclusion?" She gave him a teasing smile.

Jack looked up at her beautiful face, pale in the soft evening light. A mischievous twinkle began to dance in his eyes. "I'm still thinking about it. There are a lot of pros and cons to consider?"

Sam began to play along. "Absolutely. For example, pro: it's much warmer inside." She hugged her jacket around her more tightly to emphasize the validity of the point.

"Con," Jack eagerly retorted, happy for the chance to engage her in an kind of conversation, "such a sudden change of temperature could cause overheating. I might get a little woozy and need someone to hold me up." He grinned and waggled his eyebrows at her.

Sam gave a snort. "I'm sure Teal'c would catch you."

Jack's face fell, but Sam stepped a little closer and continued with their game. "Pro: all your friends are in there and they would be very happy to see you."

Jack echoed Sam's movements and narrowed the gap between them. "Con: my sudden and unexpected appearance might cause quite a commotion. It could even lead to injuries. Janet would be very upset if she had to work tonight, and I try never to upset Janet. You know she has all those big scary needles." Jack gave a mock shudder.

"Cassie will protect you," Sam assured him.

Feeling like she was on a roll, Sam offered another suggestion, "Pro: there's music. You could maybe dance with someone."

Unthinkingly Sam's hips began to sway softly, back and forth. Jack stared entranced, then nervously cleared his throat. "Con: Vala would probably tackle me first."

Sam shook her head. "I think Cam has Vala occupied for the evening."

They were standing well and truly within one another's personal space now and neither Sam nor Jack was certain how much longer they could maintain the presence of mind required for this game of theirs. Jack unconsciously wet his lips. Sam ducked her chin but lifted her eyes to him. Her lips were lightly pursed. It would be so easy to lean down and capture them with his own, Jack thought, but he wasn't certain how she would receive that. She was playing along with him, which was a hopeful sign, but Jack was sure it would take more than a little teasing banter to get fully back into her good graces.

Finally, Sam met his eyes in a triumphant smile, "Pro: there's cake."

"Ah," Jack stepped back, literally and figuratively, and raised his hands in surrender, "there is no con for that one."

Sam thought the game was over, but Jack was not finished yet. "There is one last con to consider."

"What's that?" Sam saw Jack's posture straighten and his voice sobered.

"If we go inside," Jack stepped back into her space, "I would no longer have you all to myself." He looked down on her with a searing gaze and Sam's cheeks warmed.

"Who says I'm staying?" Sam attempted to lighten the mood again, but Jack had turned serious.

"Will you stay with me?"

Sam felt breathless. She wasn't sure what he was asking of her. Stay with him for an hour, stay with him tonight, stay forever? "Jack."

He took her hands in his and began leading her toward the nearby gazebo where they could sit down. "I have a story I want to tell you."

They settled next to one another on the covered bench. Jack continued to hold her hands. Looking down at first, he started speaking in a quiet voice.

"After the accident, when Charlie was in the comma, I would sit with him for hours and I would tell him stories." Sam could tell this was hard for him to talk about. He struggled to get the words out. "They were stories about us exploring new worlds together. Charlie loved discovering new places, learning new things. I thought if he could hear me, he might wake up and we could keep making up stories like that together."

Sam reached out and brushed a tear from Jack's face. He didn't stop; he just kept on talking about those weeks he spent in the hospital waiting for Charlie to wake up.

"After Charlie died and Sara left, I closed myself up in the cabin and started writing all those stories down. Whenever I'm writing it's like he's still with me." Jack paused, lost in the memory of those difficult early days of loneliness and raw pain.

"Of course Daniel wouldn't let me alone." The words were harsh, but the tone wasn't. Jack's true fondness for Daniel, even when he was medaling in Jack's life, came through loud and clear. "I let him read the manuscripts just to get him out of my hair. Then he convinced me to share them with a friend of his in the publishing business.

"Writing those books is my way of coping; it's how I stay connected to my son." Jack's concluded his story and his eyes pleaded with Sam to understand everything he was trying to tell her.

It was an apology. He didn't say the words but Sam knew that's what he meant by opening up his past to her like this. She grieved for this sweet little boy who was taken too soon, and for this dear, lovely man who still grieved so deeply for his lost son.

Sam had always loved the Heaven's Doorway books. There was something so profoundly real about them despite their fantastical premise. Now she understood. Each one was a piece of Jack's heart, and she loved them all the more because of that.

Sam was trying to formulate a reply, some way of telling him that all was forgiven and she wanted them to start again if they could, when Jack resumed speaking. "I'm actually working on the next book, and I'm thinking it could use a new character."

What Jack had just shared with Sam had been hard. He'd never talked so openly like that about Charlie with anyone, even Daniel. But what he wanted to say next was the good part and he couldn't wait to share it.

"What do you think about a beautiful, brilliant scientist? Someone who could open up all kinds of new worlds and new possibilities for our heroes to explore." Jack got a wicked look in his eye that Sam was quickly coming to recognize and adore, "I think there might even be a romance angle to all this. After all, as you know, my protagonist is very handsome and mysterious. I think that just might appeal to a scientific genius."

Sam's heart wanted to soar. Now that Sam knew the inspiration for these books she could pick out several familiar characters. She recognized that Jack only included the people he really loved in his novels.

Jack was enjoying himself now. "Did I mention she's really hot?"

Sam punched him in the side. She was not going to have her character reduced to a sex object she informed him.

"I'll probably need someone to be my consultant, just to make sure I get the details right." This was Jack's way of asking her to stay.

Sam wasn't ready to make it that easy for him. "Hmmm. Too bad Dr. Lee is leaving town."

Jack was not fazed. "Wonder who might be replacing him?"

"You already knew Jonas offered me the job!" Sam accused.

Jack continued to play dumb. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

But the grin on his face told Sam she was right. Jack must have spoken to Jonas sometime that afternoon, or maybe earlier. Janet had said Jack was doing everything he could to keep her in town.

Sam leaned into him and he placed an arm around her shoulder. "Thank you."

"For what?" Jack asked.

Sam adjusted her position to look into his eyes, now completely sober and awaiting her reply.

"For wanting me to stay," Sam supplied.

"Always."

o-O-o

Although Jack would have been content to remain outside alone with Sam all night, she finally convinced him he needed to make an appearance at the party. They did cause quite a stir walking in together, arms around one another, but nobody fainted.

Catherine approached them first. "Jack, Merry Christmas. It's so good to see you here."

The tiny older woman pulled him in for a hug. Jack returned the hug with gusto. Sam was afraid the poor woman might topple over, but Catherine just laughed and passed him back to Sam with some advice, "Now you're going to have quite a bit of trouble keeping this one in line, but I have no doubt you can handle it."

Before Jack could pretend to be wounded by that remark, Daniel and Janet were beside them. Jack took in the happy couple. "Well done Danny boy," Jack reached out and mussed his hair, "she actually agreed to marry you." Janet gave Jack a look that said, "Watch it, I still have my needles."

Jack and Sam both received an enthusiastic embrace from Cassie. Teal'c gave an approving bow.

Once they finished greeting most of the town, Jack led Sam onto the dance floor. She stepped into his arms and they began to move together like they had done it all their lives. As the music ended Jack couldn't resist the opportunity. He cradled her weight with his arms and swept her downward at a steep angle but still held her close. Bending over her, he captured her lips with his own. Startled at first, Sam quickly settled into the kiss, entangling her fingers in the fine grey hair at the base of his neck.

When their mouths eventually parted, thunderous applauses roared all around them. Sam could feel her whole body redden at the attention. Jack ignored it all.

He looked into Sam's eyes and said, "I think this is going to be a very Merry Christmas." Then he bent his head down for another kiss, and despite her embarrassment Sam eagerly obliged.

And Teal'c, who was standing nearby, upon hearing Jack's declaration added in a firm and resonant voice, "Indeed!"