2. Little Talks

Emma was so lost in thought that she didn't even register as the sound of Mary Margaret's footsteps made their way over.

"You look tired," Snow said to her. "You should get some sleep."

Emma looked up and in Snow's arms was a spare blanket. Her mother sat next to her and wrapped the blanket around the both of them.

"Thanks," said Emma. She looked down at her necklace again. "I couldn't sleep though even if I wanted to."

Snow looked at her daughter. "Emma what is it, you've been distant since you got back."

Emma shook her head. "It's nothing, just had a lot on my mind that's all."

"Would it help to talk about it?"

"Not really," Emma replied.

She had more than wanted to talk to Snow about it. She had for months long before she knew Snow was her mom. First back when Sidney had written the article about her getting into trouble and her son being born in jail; the two had never gotten the chance to talk about it then. And then later when she had told Mary Margaret about lying to Henry about his father.

Emma took a deep breath. She had held in her memories for close to over seventeen hours. Hook had managed to break her barrier for her to admit she had been in love once. If she could say those words to a complete stranger then maybe talking to her mother would be the better option. And maybe if she could let it go, at least for the time being then she could focus better on the mission and eventually get some sleep.

She held up the necklace.

"I've tried to get rid of this old thing for years. And just when I come close I back out," Emma said.

"It must have some kind of special meaning for you to hold onto it."

"You have no idea."

Emma took another deep breath. It was one thing to think about the memories in private, another to actually bring herself to say them out loud.

"I told you once that I lied about Henry's father being dead."

"I remember."

"This was from him. I've kept it for ten years and for ten years I've tried to get rid of it."

"Emma," Snow said placing a hand on her daughters'. "What happened while you were up there?"

Emma shook her head. "Hook broke through those walls I put up. He didn't crush them completely but he was starting too. I didn't leave him with the giant to give us a head start." She looked at her mother directly. "I left him because I didn't like being vulnerable."

"And Henry's father, what does he have to do with this, other than the necklace?"

"Hook got…personal," she said turning her head downward. "In so many ways I was reminded of Neal. I can usually bury the memories but I couldn't today and I still haven't been able to. Sometimes I'm able to look back and be happy for the time I spent with him but there are other times when none of it makes any sense and I get angry with how we left things."

"He really hurt you didn't he?"

"Yeah he did. You were right about me: that wall I put up is to protect myself. After what he did, the way he abandoned me and turned me in to the cops, I've never completely trusted another man since then. But it was more than just what he did. I…."

Emma couldn't bring herself to say the words but Snow knew.

"You loved him," she said in understanding.

"Yeah," was all Emma could reply.

"And you haven't been able to let go of him completely have you?"

"I can't. I've tried trust me but as angry as I am at him at the same time… I don't know."

Snow squeezed Emma's hand. "You want to have faith that his reasons may have been justified but you don't want to have hope."

"There's just no point. He's never coming back. And I shouldn't even care about why he did what he did. I always thought he was different and that he wasn't a bad guy. I tried to find him the same way I tried to find you and I never could."

"Well you did find us. Maybe you'll find him."

"Maybe but do I really want to?"

"That's a question only you can answer Emma."

"I don't know, maybe I should let go, give up."

"I know you; you're not the give up type. You get that from your father and me it seems. You'll find him again, even if you don't want to."

"That's what I'm afraid of."

Snow smiled at her daughter. Emma was strong, always had been since they first met. She knew her daughter would find the strength to face whatever it was she needed to confront.

"Get some rest," Snow said to her. "You've had a long day. I'll keep a look out, I'll watch over you while you sleep."

Emma began to get a little nervous, "You don't have to do that."

"I want to."

Emma smiled at her mother and got in a laying position, her head resting on Snow's lap. It felt odd but at the same time it felt nice, slightly nicer as Snow caressed her hair.

This whole night had actually. Feeling like a weight was finally, at least partially pushed to the side, Emma felt she could actually get some sleep even if it was only for a little while.

Neal would always be a constant memory and there would come a time when she knew she would be faced with the task of finding him again but that was a situation for some other time.

Right now the only focus was to find a way around Cora and to get home.

~END~