The Day of the Party, After Dinner
"We'll meet you in the dormitory, Lil," Marlene assured her as she left with Zoe, Harley, and the Marauders up to Gryffindor Tower. "Remember, we have to wrap presents!"
"Oh please, don't inconvenience yourselves on my account," Sirius said, pretending to blush. "You didn't even have to get me anything. Just pop out of a cake in a bikini and I'm happy."
"Well, that's an odd request," James said, shrugging. "But for you Padfoot, I suppose me and Moony could make that happen next year. I may have to borrow one of your swimsuits…" he trailed off, looking at the girls.
They laughed while Sirius scowled. "Mate, you need to keep your undeniable crush on me in check, now it's just getting awkward."
"The heart wants what the heart wants."
"Bye, Lily!" Zoe called as they rounded the corner, leaving Lily at the base of the stairs, watching her friends in amusement.
"See you!" Lily called over her shoulder. She was going to join them soon, just after meeting with Liam.
She still didn't know what he wanted. All through Ancient Runes he hadn't acted any differently than normal. When they partnered up for the classwork Professor Babbling assigned, they got their work done quickly and spent the remaining time talking like they normally did. Nothing seemed wrong.
"Hello."
Lily nearly jumped out her skin. She spun around and saw Liam himself right behind her, smiling sweetly.
"Hi!" Lily said brightly, admiring the way his blonde hair looked perfectly tousled. She unconsciously ran a hand through her hair, attempting to make it look perfect. She stood on her toes to give him a quick kiss, but he looked at a passerby and greeted them. It was timed so that Lily couldn't tell if he was purposefully ignoring her or just happened to look away at the wrong moment. Nevertheless, she put her heels back on the ground and ran her hand through her hair again, this time uncomfortably.
"Shall we go down to the lake?" Liam asked. Without really waiting for an answer, he took her hand and pulled her through the castle until they reached the cliff overlooking the lake.
He led her to a bench and sat down, but didn't say anything.
Lily hated the silence. They usually never ran out of things to say. She sat up straighter and attempted conversation. "Are you going to come to Sirius's party? I can give you the password to the Common Room."
Liam shook his head. "No, thanks though. I just… would feel awkward."
Lily nodded, his answer only confirming her suspicions. "Well, why don't you come just for me?" she asked, giving him a small smile.
"Because… well, Lily…"
"What's this about?" Lily asked, her eyes flashing almost dangerously.
Liam visibly gulped.
"Well, you see…"
Lily walked down the corridor leading to the Gryffindor Common Room in a daze.
"It's for the best, I think…"
She had an odd feeling in her chest that she couldn't quite place.
"…it's just, with this being our NEWT year I think we both need to focus on our studies…"
It wasn't sadness. Well, part of it was, but she didn't even feel like crying for some reason.
"…I care about you, I do…"
Lily almost felt… angry? It wasn't the weird feeling in her chest, but anger was present.
"We had a good run, but…"
No warning. Just like that - boom.
"…I think we should see other people."
But she didn't really care, and that almost scared her a little. Nine months, and she can't even shed a tear for her ex boyfriend? Mary would be disgusted with her. She didn't understand it. When she and Xander Macon split in Fifth Year, she at least ate a bowl full of ice cream, and they'd only been together for seven weeks!
It was almost like - and it pained her to admit this to herself - she was relieved. And she knew exactly why.
The Day After, Transfiguration Class
Hey, Lily.
I'm trying to take notes, Harley.
Just ask James for help during lunch, you know this is his best subject.
I really don't want to be anywhere near James at the moment.
I know it's awkward, but none of us remember anything. This will all blow over in a day or two.
It's still embarrassing.
Lily, I woke up with twigs in my hair and dirt all over my face.
I woke up practically naked with James!
Hmm… Fair point, I guess you win. Did you get your clothes back?
They were on my bed when I went up before class. I guess he put them back or something.
Good, because Zoe wants her dress back.
It smells like the lake.
Why?
No idea, but I am starting to remember a little bit.
Yeah? I am, too. But mostly I just remember what happened before the younger students went to bed. When was that? Around midnight?
That's what I remember too. We got dressed, came downstairs and James made everyone yell 'surprise' when Sirius walked in. Then it was just normal. They had cake and everything.
And when everyone went to bed, you let Sirius bring out the Firewhiskey. And then I guess we drank.
A lot.
Yeah. But at least we remember that much!
Small comfort. Everything else is still blank. Why did we go outside, anyway?
You're asking the wrong person. You were the one who gave us detention, after all.
True, but I don't remember doing it.
Whatever-
"Miss Evans, Miss Pensky, would you kindly pay attention?"
Lily snapped her head up from the parchment and sent a guilty smile towards McGonagall. "Sorry, Professor."
The Party, 20:43
"That should do it, Moony," James said.
Remus flicked his wand and the banner reading "Happy Birthday!" in large block letters pasted itself to the wall.
The Common Room was completely transformed. Remus, James, and Peter had gone to the kitchens immediately after dinner and brought up snacks, Butterbeer, and pitchers of a fruity drink to put in the punch bowl. Sirius gathered decorations and then made himself scarce, going to Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff and extending invitations to some of their friends. He said he'd be back at 8:30, so they only had about five minutes.
Practically everyone in Gryffindor house was mulling around the Common Room, waiting for the party to start, but James noticed four girls were missing.
"Hey, Bailey!" he called to the pretty Sixth Year prefect. She turned away from her group of friends and James, like most of the male species, couldn't help but admire the way she looked. Bailey was a distant cousin of Sirius', and though they've never looked that much alike, she'd gotten the basic Black traits: long, shiny dark hair and eyes lined with thick, black lashes.
"Hey. Where's the birthday boy?" she asked.
"He's gone to get our friends from Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. But that's not important. Could you do me a favor and go see what's taking Lily and them so long? Sirius will be back soon."
Bailey rolled her eyes, as if she knew something James didn't. "Of course. Sirius will be upset by them not showing up."
"What are you on about?" James asked, confused.
The Sixth Year shrugged innocently. "Nothing. I'll go get them."
"Thanks."
"Mhm." She turned on her heel and ushered her best friend, Mary, up the stairs with her.
James watched them ascend the steps and turned back around to help Peter pour the punch into the bowl.
"He broke up with you?"
Lily was sitting on her bed, with Marlene, Zoe, and Harley, who were all in various stages of getting dressed, standing around her, frowning. Lily was about to answer but the sound of their door banging against the wall made her start and turn around to see Bailey and Mary standing in the doorway.
"Christ, barge in on us again, please, I don't think my heart skipped enough beats," Zoe said, putting a hand over her heart for dramatic effect.
"Sorry," Bailey winced, the two of them walking into the room and joining Lily on her bed. It was not unusual for the two Sixth Years to be in the Seven Years' dorm. Bailey was on the Quidditch Team, and she was already good friends with Harley and Marlene. Mary was just the type of sociable person who got on well with everyone.
"Lily?" Mary prompted.
"Hm? Oh. Yeah, he did. Just now." Her voice sounded a little flat, and she stared at a blank piece of wall.
"Are you… all right?" Zoe asked.
Lily shrugged. "You know, it's weird. We've been together nine months, and I… I don't feel anything. Not sadness, not anger. Well, actually there is some anger. But it's like… I feel relaxed. Relieved. Like I knew this was going to happen and I've been waiting for a while. But I wasn't. It caught me totally off guard."
"Did you love him?" Bailey asked.
"No," Lily answered, no hesitation.
"That's probably it," Marlene said. "You two were together just to… be together, I suppose. I mean, there's nothing wrong with Liam-"
"Oh, no, I'm not saying that," Lily defended herself, "he's lovely, but-"
"I don't know, I thought he was kind of a prat," Harley interrupted.
"But you two just didn't really have anything special," Marlene said, rolling her eyes at Harley's comment. "There's nothing wrong with that."
"No," Lily concluded, lying back on her bed, staring at the ceiling. The five other girls all exchanged looks.
Bailey cleared her throat. "Not the best time, obviously, but James sent me and Mary up here to remind you the party is starting soon."
This caused the four Seventh Years to motivate. Lily sat up immediately and rifled through her trunk for her makeup bag while Marlene ran into the bathroom.
"Is this a dress robes type of thing?" Marlene called from where she was stationed in front of the mirror.
"Everyone downstairs is going Muggle," Bailey informed them.
"Harley, can I wear your silver hoops?" Zoe asked.
"Only if I get your flats."
Zoe walked briskly out of the bathroom with her wand held up to her eyes, curling her lashes before carefully moving to their shared closet and taking a midnight blue party dress from her designated area. "Lily?"
The Head Girl turned around and looked over to the brunette questioningly.
"You should wear this." And she threw it at her.
"With my gold necklace?"
"And these shoes," Marlene added, pulling a pair of Lily's own strappy heels from under her bed.
"How long have you had those?" Lily asked, frowning.
"I think I borrowed them for the summer festival."
"That was last year, Mar."
"I'm giving them back now, aren't I?" Marlene smiled guilty, but Lily couldn't stay angry. "Besides, you never missed them."
"And you need to do something about your hair," Mary prompted, as though it was obvious.
"What's wrong with my hair?" Lily asked.
"Nothing, of course, you're gorgeous," Mary assured her. "But you're officially on rebound! You need to show Liam that you aren't tied down to him."
They all sent Mary A Look.
"What?" she said defensively. "This matters."
"Whatever, Mary," Lily smiled. "Let's just finish getting dressed."
"Eight-thirty!" Bailey reminded them before she and Mary set off downstairs.
The party had been going on for almost three hours, and it was a marvelous success. They had acquired a giant cake that was only half-eaten and sitting on one of the food tables laden with sweets and drinks. Lily spent the evening chatting with friends, playing a few party games, and dancing for most of the night. Right now she was getting a drink and looking over the crowd. She hadn't seen James much the entire night.
"Enjoying yourself?"
Lily, who had been taking a sip from her Butterbeer, almost inhaled the entire thing out of surprise. Speak of the devil.
"Blimey! Sorry, did I scare you?" James laughed, patting Lily on the back while she coughed to clear her throat.
"Oh - er - no," Lily said, turning red. "Just surprised me is all."
"Right," James grinned. "So, O'Haire broke up with you?" he asked conversationally.
Lily almost choked on her drink again. "You really aren't one for tact," she commented drily.
James shrugged. "Didn't really feel like tip-toeing over the obvious."
"Who told you?"
"Mary."
"'Course," Lily smiled and shook her head at her predictable friend.
"Are you all right? I mean - not that you don't look it. Usually when a girl gets dumped she's crying or something, but you… you look all right."
Lily shrugged. "I'm fine. We weren't right for each other, so why waste time mourning over something that would've never worked?"
"Are you saying that because you really believe it or because he dumped you unexpectedly?" James asked bluntly.
Lily's shoulders dropped a bit. "A bit of both, I guess," she admitted.
"Hey, there's no problem getting dolled up after a break up. Especially at a party - best place for a rebound, see?"
Lily laughed. "You sound like Mary."
"Well, if she's the one who put you in that little ensemble, I'll have to thank her," he gestured to her outfit. James's expression went softer, and he said in a gentler tone, "You look really pretty, Lil."
The Head Girl blushed. "Thanks. You look all right, yourself."
James frowned. "Hmm…I would've preferred 'dashing' or even 'incredibly sexy'. But I guess 'all right' will have to work."
Lily laughed again and when she heard a familiar song start playing, she grabbed his hands. "C'mon."
"Er… why?"
"I said we'd dance to a Beatles song, remember?"
The look of joy on James's face almost made her blush again, but they joined the throng of people in the middle of the cleared-out space in the Common Room and he twirled her around to "Hold Me Tight" while most of the people in the room sung along.
Beside her, Harley was taking silly pictures of Sirius with Marlene's Muggle camera (charmed to work off of magic). Zoe and Remus were organizing records and deciding which songs to play next, while Marlene was talking to Bailey and Mary.
Lily looked over James's shoulder to see a small first year girl go up to Sirius and ask for a dance. He agreed, and exaggeratedly waltzed her through the crowd. She giggled and made to tell James to look, but as soon as she made eye contact she stopped.
It's silly, Lily thought to herself, how little you really notice someone. She'd spent many a late night with James, going over schedules and detentions with James, talking to James, laughing with James, and just simply being with James, but she felt like she was finally just looking at him. With her shoes, she was only a few inches shorter than him, and could clearly see the gold and green flecks in his eyes, how they were almost magnified by his glasses. She didn't notice that they slowed their previously vigorous dance to a slow rotation while everyone around them continued twirling and jumping. She noticed that his cheeks had a definite reddish tint to them. They were chest-to-chest, their noses were inches apart, and Lily's eyes roamed his entire face. His eyes, the impossibly pale sprinkling of freckles on his upper cheeks, the fullness of his lips, how they seemed to be getting closer to her own...
James suddenly lurched forward, his forehead hitting Lily's painfully. They both gasped in pain and wheeled around to see what had caused it.
"Oh, sorry!" A Fifth Year Lily didn't recognize giggled before continuing on her path to her friends.
James turned back around and looked at Lily, and suddenly it was very awkward.
"I - er - I'm going to - uh - go," Lily stammered, eyes wide.
James's hand leaped to his hair and muttered some sort of agreement before they both walked in opposite directions.
Lily caught Harley's eye, and one questioning look from the brunette and Lily knew she saw most of what just happened. Lily mouthed, I'll tell you later! and ducked back into the crowd.
The Day After, Transfiguration
Lily wasn't paying very much attention to Professor McGonagall after she and Harley stopped passing notes. Every time she looked up, she could see Liam glaring at her. When he saw her notice him, he would quickly look away. The rest of the boys in Ravenclaw looked a tad put out as well, but Liam was just glaring, and she had no idea why.
Also, on the other hand, James was sitting directly in front of her, and it was driving her crazy. Maybe she should apologize. But apologize for what? "Sorry, I was completely sloshed last night, I hope the fact that I was barely clothed and in your bed doesn't bother you any." But then again, this wasn't her fault. Technically, it wasn't his either, but, well… that wasn't the point.
The bell signaled the end of class, and the Seventh Years immediately pushed back on their chairs and stuffed their books into their bags. The room was filled with chatter as everyone shouldered their bags and left the classroom.
Before she lost any sort of her nerve, Lily gently grabbed James's elbow. "James, wait."
Startled, he tensed up but stopped walking. "Save me a seat," he said to Sirius' curious look.
James stood in front of Lily, his arms crossed defensively in front of his chest, giving her a look that said, 'Well?'
"Er," Lily started. "How are you?"
Jams gave her an exasperated look. "Spectacular."
Lily flinched at his tone. "Look, I - I know that this is really awkward, but - do you suppose we could both just forget about it?"
Something flashed in James's eyes. It was almost like a flicker of disappointment, but it was gone so quickly Lily couldn't catch it.
"What? It's so embarrassing to have been in bed with me? I dunno how to tell you this, but I've already told half the school."
Lily stammered and gaped like a drowning fish (very attractive). "You what?"
"I'm kidding."
"Oh," Lily sighed in relief. "I just… think it would be easier."
"Right."
"We were sloshed, James," she said softly. "I… I don't think it would've happened otherwise."
This time, she definitely saw a look of hurt cross his face, and she was surprised to feel very upset because of that.
But then he was smiling and rolling his eyes. "Of course it wouldn't've, Lily," he ran a hand through his hair. "People do stupid things when there's Firewhiskey involved."
Lily gave a small smile. "Yeah, you're right."
"Anyways, let's get to class before Professor Rostlin gives us the cranky Venomous Tentacula." He shouldered his bag and gestured for her to join him, but then he shot a look of dislike past her.
Lily spun around to see Liam approaching them.
"Lily," he said in greeting.
"Oh… hi."
"Potter, do you think you could give us a moment?" Liam asked politely, but the underlying tone made it obvious he didn't care what James did.
James didn't look like he was going anywhere. "I'll see you in Herbology," Lily told him. Finally, he walked out of the classroom and turned down the hallway towards the Green Houses.
Lily crossed her arms and gave Liam her attention. "What do you want?"
The Ravenclaw looked affronted. "I don't know why you're angry," he said.
Lily frowned. "Are you kidding me? What have I done to you?"
"Oh, don't play dumb," Liam accused. "It doesn't suit you." He rubbed his eyes in irritation. "Fine, look, I get it. You were angry. Despite it being entirely immature, so long as you at least apologize, I won't report it."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the fact that you trashed my dormitory!" Liam accused.
"What? I haven't done anything!"
"Then why did it say 'Love from Lily and the Gryffindors' on the wall next to my bed?" Liam asked drily.
Lily's eyes widened. "Er…"
Liam rolled his eyes. "Whatever, be that way. I expected more of you, Lily." He turned and stalked away.
It was then that Lily remembered exactly what he was talking about, for on the back of his cloak, unbeknownst to Liam, it said "Pansy" in pink cursive letters surrounded by flowers.
AN: So this is super emberassing, because I finished the whole story about two weeks ago, I edited myself and then I sent it to be beta'd and separated the chapters into different story docs and literally just every day I add an Author's Note and publish it. I don't even read over them I'm so done with reading this fic.
So I finally read this chapter over again and I'm sitting here like "What? We haven't even gotten to the lake yet?" (lol spoilers) and yeah. Like I feel like things are going really slow. But this works for me, the every day updates and such.
Final count of chapters is eight - a prologue, six chapters, and an epilogue (which will be published with chapter six because its only like 800 words). We're on chapter three, so only three updates left! :D Excited?
Be sure to review, they fill me with the sort of happiness that only reviews can bring! ^_^
Beta'd by Stefanie at Bigger and Beta on tumblr! :D
PS: Someone made me think of this - I in NO WAY encourage underage drinking/heavily drinking/starting a relationship whilst drunk. Just a story line! Be responsible! ^_^