Cora had been watching the Mary and Tom when they returned. She had, of course, chided Mary greatly for running away like she had and to be honest was rather surprised that Tom had forgiven her so quickly. She had seen how much he had been trying to help her. Over the past few days they had spent all of the time Tom was not working on estate matters together, often also with the children. When she had mentioned it to Violet, all her mother-in-law had said was that she should just be happy Mary was becoming herself again. Mary had even laughed the night before – a sound that no one had heard since before Matthew's accident. Still… this friendship with Tom. Was it right? Mary was still quite young and she could probably marry again could she not? Mary deserved to not be alone forever and she knew Matthew would rather agree.

….

It was the middle of the night and Mary could not sleep. She had been tossing and turning for what felt like forever. She wished Matthew was there. He would be awake right now and they would be talking. He would have taken her in his arms and held her while whispering loving words into her ear until she fell asleep. In some ways that was when she was most lonely, at night on instances such as this. Then it occurred to her, Tom. She could go and talk to Tom. She knew it was not proper but if she had learnt anything, it was that propriety often led to worse places. She slid out of bed and put on her dressing gown.

Mary knocked softly on Tom's door and slid inside. The room was dark but she could see Tom sitting up in bed. He was rubbing his eyes of sleep

"Mary?" he said, clearly confused.

"I am sorry to wake you….. I…I couldn't sleep and I…. I just wanted to hear a friendly voice I suppose" she stammered.

Tom smiled in understanding and motioned for her to sit on the bed next to him.

"What would your grandmother say eh?" said Tom. "I'm sure this ain't proper".

"You are probably right" Mary agreed.

"Probably?! More like definitely." said Tom.

They laughed.

"It is so strange to laugh. When they told me, I thought I never would laugh again. Ever. It feels wrong. Almost disrespectful. But then I know that Matthew would not want me to be unhappy. " said Mary.

"He would not. When we die and we meet them again, they would surely chastise us severely for not trying to be happy." said Tom.

Mary could see Matthew's stern face and giggled again at the memory. She looked over at Tom, wondering if he too was thinking of his lost love.

"I worry that mama will want me to remarry. She does not understand that I cannot possibly. I will never love anyone again like I loved him. Now that I know what it feels like how can I marry anyone who expects that level of devotion from me when I cannot possibly give it?" said Mary.

Tom gave her a sad smile. "But you do not have to marry again do you?" said he.

"No, I suppose not. I just feel so alone." confessed Mary. "At night, during the day, when I am with William. All these moments that Matthew is missing and will never see…"

"He is watching, I know."

They sat in silence until, without noticing they both fell asleep.

…

There was a loud wail next to him. Tom sat up, confused. He could not understand where it was coming from. Then he realised that Mary was next to him. She was tossing and turning and letting out high pitched wails. He put his hands on Mary's shoulders pinning her down and he gently shook her awake.

"Mary… Mary" said Tom.

Slowly Mary opened her eyes and looked up at him. Her eyes were filled with sadness and fear. She began to cry.

"Oh Tom, it was awful. Matthew…..blood and he.. He ….." she could not get the words out.

Tom pulled her into his arms and she sobbed into his shoulders. He made shushing noises into her ear and rocked her gently.

"Mary, it's alright" he said over and over again.

Her sobs quietened and her breathing began to return to normal. She whispered into his shoulder: "It haunts me, the accident and I was not even there. But I can see it so clearly … the blood and Matthew's lifeless face…"

Tom just hugged her even more tightly. Mary found herself feeling safe for the first time in ages.

A/N: I know its short but please review...