Chapter 12: Sophie's Journal

I am so fortunate to have the parents that I have. After Irene's descent into what I am going to un-creatively call insanity, and her death, I've been a little beside myself. I keep thinking about Michael and how I could have changed things. I think I am going to be hurting over that for a long time. I can't say it's okay now, but I think things will get better.

Amber's neck has healed nicely and though we missed the last two exhibitions, we will be entering the next one. We have to carry on.

Papa was hurt by Irene's death (for real this time.) I know he would never see her as a sexual object as so many have, but he still felt something for her. Apparently when they all knew each other before, she was quite the clever troublemaker.

Heather and I have become good friends and she occasionally comes out to our house to visit. She had never been horseback riding before, so I taught her how to ride. Now she has her own horse here. She found herself a small flat in town and she has been working at the public library. Funny that, that's not even the sort of place I pictured her to work in once we really started to become friends. I figured she was a bartender in some posh place that catered to steampunking vampires. (I am kidding.)(Mostly.) Anyway, she is a strong person and there is a lot more to her than meets the eye. I think she's got a boyfriend, some guy from one of the universities, but I have yet to meet him.

Darren has filled me in on everything that happened while I was gone and I gave him my side of the story. He hugged me that day and then he kissed me. I think we've got something here, but I have no wish to dwell on it yet. (Trust me, that day is coming.) He says the reason he's always been so gruff around me is that he was afraid to talk to me, considering who my dads and uncles are. I just laughed at him. I think he's coming around.

Grammy Hudson says sometimes it takes men forever to decide how they feel when it comes to matters of the heart. She always looks at Papa and/or Daddy when she says this and they always give her the funniest looks right back. I just shrug and smile. One of these days I am going to make them sit down and tell me the whole story and I am going to write it all down. Oh sure, if you read Daddy's blog you will see tiny bits of it, but nothing like I believe the story to be.

I have never been able to discern what it was that Irene wanted from my Papa so badly. Is it possible that love can tip over into dangerous obsession?

Sophie's blog, later

There have been hundreds of stories of lovers, some ill-fated and star-crossed, others that make it to the happily-ever-after state. Some that burn hot and bright in the beginning and then burn out like dud fireworks, leaving no trace of itself behind. Others burn like a dying star and then slowly trickle down into a mutual respect for one another, even after admitting differences that can no longer be repaired by time or science or the laws of the land.

Some romances never get a chance to be, because they are one-sided. A love so one-sided that it borders on obsession is a dangerous thing, hurting so many other people in its wake like a giant tsunami. It is a primeval force that seeks to crush everything in its path, even unawares. I would never have believed something like that possible, had I not seen it with my own two eyes. So many people hurt because one person simply could not move on. Is this the part when a border is crossed and love turns into hate and a desire for revenge?

But, how can one have revenge on someone who was unknowing in the first place? When the dark knight saved the woman's life, he did it for no other reason than compassion. This fact alone probably surprised the dark knight himself, even more than it did the woman. She crossed borders for him, thinking he would somehow see her and come back to her. His heart, however, was already given to another.

-Sophie