"What the hell was that?" she demanded. This was another of those situations that demanded a curse. Her heart was pounding out of her chest and her lips tingled. Her whole body was covered in a cold sweat, both excited and scared. Abed wasn't even looking at her, as if what had happened hadn't bothered him at all. Was he playing another character? She couldn't tell anymore and that scared her.

He grabbed a handful of popcorn and ate it a piece at a time. He still hadn't answered.

"Abed," she said worried by the mood swing and that made him turn back to her, offering some of the snack. She pushed it away.

"Should I pretend to be shocked? I thought the cat was already out of the bag," he said as if he'd missed a scene in a film. She shook her head.

"No, no you don't have to be anything," she said her confusion growing as he talked. Had that meant nothing at all to him? Kisses had always been something she considered special. She saw them as a gift. You gave them out once in a while, but not to too many people so they would continue to be special. No one should steal them, because gifts should always be given willingly or they weren't gifts at all. "I just don't understand why you did that."

"I had to do it in order to skip to the climax of the story."

She blushed.

"I didn't intend that sexually," he said calmly making her blush worse, "But I can understand how it was taken that way."

"So, if that was the...apex of the story arch," she said finding it impossible to say climax, "What happens now?"

"You come to the realization that our kiss meant nothing special to you. That it was nice, but not something you need. Now that the buildup is gone that should be a simple task," Abed said before going back to eating.

A simple task? To stop feeling everything she'd started feeling in these last few weeks? That was supposed to be a simple? She forced herself to stare at Abed and see only normal Abed there instead of the man she'd been seeing lately. The handsome Abed who was licking the salt of his fingers in an awkward way that still made her stomach twist in odd ways.

"And if I can't?" she asked wondering where this was leading. If she really couldn't get over this obsession with him could they still be friends? With Jeff, even if he had rejected her time and again, had been flattered by her attention and grown up enough work past it. Abed couldn't even deal with a new sitting arrangement, how could he deal with this?

"Should I change my shirt? You seem to like this one too much," he asked shifting and to grab a different one.

"No," she said giving him a playful nudged, because he was right, "But I'm serious. What if?"

"You will. You'll remember your emotional attachment to Jeff and go back to it. We'd be a great side ship or crack pairing, but never endgame material," he said using those weird terms that she'd started looking up ages ago. Now she understood what he was saying, unfortunately.

"And if I don't?" she asked her feelings about Jeff the last thing she wanted to focus on. Right now, there was only Abed, the smell of his shampoo, this bed and the two inches of skin on their arms that was touching. It was hard to imagine that a world outside the pillow fort existed.

"Then I'll have to give a long winded speech that might get pretty boring and involve a lot of basic information repackaged."

Okay, she might be good at his jargon, but half of that didn't make sense. It was frustrating, but only because she was so anxious to understand him.

"What's the speech?" she asked her voice peaking oddly at the last word. She had a feeling she wasn't going to like this, but she couldn't be sure.

"I wish I could fast forward through this part too," Abed said softly then turned off the movie all together, but left the screen on for the lighting, "Do you remember how the group got together?"

"We all needed a study group, because we were failing Spanish," she said remembering the whole situation fondly.

"No, that's not it," he corrected her, "Jeff was trying to sleep with Britta and offered to help her study. She invited me to join this group to ease the sexual tension and I invited the rest of you. I handpicked each and everyone one of you for different reasons, based off personalities and abilities to make a cohesive group. Some people daydream about winning the lottery, Annie but back then, it was friends for me. That was my lottery."

She couldn't believe what he was saying. He'd manipulated them into working together? She bit her lip, trying to hold back any sign of being upset. He hadn't done anything wrong, not in the long run. She'd never change a thing, but it was still wrong to use people. It was oddly sweet though in an Abed way. She let it pass, wondering now what any of this had to do with the present.

"I knew Jeff's obsession with Britta could only last so long. Past episode six he'd need a secondary outlet for his sexual prowess. That's where you came in."

"I was a decoy?" she asked officially upset now. That was a low blow even for him.

"That was one of the reasons. You also had a desire for friends; it was almost as deep and desperate as my own. I knew you'd help be the glue that kept together."

Annie couldn't help the tears that welled at the corner of her eyes. She always knew Abed could be calculating, but this was a bit much. It was like he'd planned out her whole life and she hadn't even known. She crossed her arms and turned away from him.

"You're upset," he said looking her over.

"I don't think I want to hear this," she said and he put his hand on hers. She turned and saw his face, compassion touching the edge of his features. It was the best he could do and she knew he had to feel it if it happened to show.

"It gets more flattering as it goes on," he said removing his hand and going back to talking, "I really did envision us as more of a Chandler and Phoebe situation, as you know they never really had adventures together. I didn't foresee you being willing to put up with my antics or understand, let alone participate so impressively in, my Dreamatruim."

She waved her hand at that, a blush lighting her cheeks. She'd thought she'd done okay, but to hear him call her impressive at something that was his own creation, was a bit much. She really did try to do the best she could, no matter how silly the activity was. The compliment had definitely turned her frown upside down.

"The more time we spent together the more possibilities I started suspecting." he told her.

"Possibilities? What sort of possibilities?"

"You're a beautiful, available woman who googles phrases I use in order to repeat them correctly and make me happy. How could I resist looking into other timelines which involve an us?"

"What happens in them?" she asked eagerly. She was a bit excited now. He'd called her beautiful and that was high praise coming from him. Her fingers played in her hair, wondering what color he liked her best in.

"You're interrupting me a lot," he said curtly. She was a bit startled and almost said something, but went quiet. It was the sort of statement that would have upset her years ago, but understood now. He wasn't trying to be rude, only misunderstood the best way to address the situation. She spoke Abed now and could translate his outburst.

"Sorry," she said and put her fingers to her mouth and zipped it closed. He nodded appreciatively.

"Thank you," he said she knew he was sincere, "I found timelines where we ended up as a couple."

The words made her heart sing. She couldn't help the excited smile on her lips, but tried to cover it up. She turned away and put her hands firmly into her lap. She would not grab his hand or coo about this. It was sweet, really was. This had to be Abed's way of telling her he had a crush on her.

"Most are pretty intense. Let's admit it, Annie, neither of us are short term people. We don't like change and don't handle losing people well. If anything ever happened it could never be casual. It's all or nothing."

All or nothing? She smiled. She liked the idea of that; someone who could commit to her was a nice change. She'd been looking for that and to find someone who could openly admit it? Well, that was definitely a plus. This conversation was doing nothing more than cement that her recent musings had been on the right track.

"In the timelines where that happens, it's not pretty," he said and her stomach dropped, "The beginning is. We're happy and things progress well. That is until things change, after college is over and we're on to what is considered the real world. You want to settle down, own a house and have a stable dual income home. You want the kids and the white picket fence and I still want to make movies and spend what you consider to be an outrageous amount of time watching TV. What you think is cute now becomes annoying and you grow increasingly frustrated. You work more, see the kids less and start using again. There tends to be three endings. You overdose after picking up illegal drugs at work, you cheat with some handsome stud of a doctor or we divorce. No matter I find it impossible to live on without you and become catatonic. If we start this, Annie and we break up, there is no second option for me. "

Annie felt like she was going to be sick. She'd gone from such a high to the lowest. This ride was no longer fun and she wanted off. She put her hands on her stomach as if the butterflies might really try to swarm out and spray all over the table.

"There is no guarantee that will happen," she said clutching to hope.

"I won't change, Annie. I've pretty much maxed out my potential and that's pretty awesome normally, but it's not what you need. It never would be. I could pretend I was the guy you needed, but neither of us would be happy."

"Are you saying," she said tears streaming down her face, she didn't know when they had started, "We're toxic together?"

"In the short term we could do great things, but in the long term," he pursed his lips and shook his head. He turned to her and put a hand on her cheek, using a thumb to wipe away a tear. Those long fingers cupping face made her sob just one, sharp and pathetic.

She swayed as she started weeping uncontrollably and Abed turned to her, opening up his arms. She fell into him, burying her face into his chest. She held onto his shirt, pulling it to her face and letting herself feel it. It was like she was watching all those stupid timelines die. Like she was letting all the possible good memories go. It was worse than a break up or a death, because they had never had the chance to be. It was like watching metaphorical babies die. His hand on her back, making small circles, was only making it worse.

Annie had been let down a lot in her life. Her parents had given up on her when things got hard. Her friends had shunned her and then even recovering addicts couldn't be bothered to pick up her phone calls. The group that Abed had created was her home, her family now and they accepted her, Abed accepted her. He was even accepting her now was she was crying like an idiot and looked like a complete mess.

He shushed her softly and she let out a rather loud wail. She couldn't help it; his kindness was like a knife stabbing her. Absently she wondered what scene from what film he was reenacting in order to be this good at comforting her. He was doing such a good job and it was killing her. His kindness was what she shouldn't have, couldn't have.

"Hey, guys," Troy's timid voice came from between the blanket curtain, "Everything okay? Is Annie in there?"

Abed went completely still then Abed kissed her forehead gently. She couldn't imagine a sweeter thing and sat back slightly dazed. She leaned forward and kissed him, desperate and pleading, but he didn't respond. He put his hands on her shoulder and pushed her away, face impassive. He put his finger to his lips and she knew he wasn't asking her to be quiet in sound, but to not say anything about the idea of them. She understood. If the group got wind they'd want them together and would try to force it. Hell, it might even work and they knew where that went. They would destroy each other; he'd convinced her of that.

"Yes, come in," Abed said and his hold on Annie suddenly awkward. She was quieter now, but the tears wouldn't stop and the occasional sob escaped.

"What's going on?" Troy asked his eyes going between them then over to the screen. He was flinching.

"She started crying," Abed said as if it wasn't obvious.

"Why?" Troy asked going over to her. Annie couldn't meet his eyes, afraid he'd know the truth.

"I don't know what to do," Abed said as she started to pull away.

"It's okay, I'll be okay," Annie lied and gave Abed one last look as she got to the edge of the fort. Remembering her daydreams of sleeping next to him made her heart heavy and the tears started up again.

She quickly turned and ran into her room, shutting the door behind her. She lay on her bed willing herself to forget everything that had happened. She held a pink stuffed animal to her stomach and wished she was too grown up to have it. She wished she was grown up and too mature for body to have such control over her.

Her door opened and she didn't look up. She assumed it was Abed and she couldn't face that.

"Hey, Annie," Troy said and she looked up surprised to see him there, "Abed told me what happened. That he talked to you about the future, about after we graduate. I'm sure he didn't mean it, but sometimes he can be so super insensitive. He's made me cry sometimes too."

Troy sat down on her bed; a few inches from her, letting her cross that space. His hand went out though, touching her shoulder. She looked up at him, big eyes watering and then crawled into his lap. She curled as close as she could to him, holding onto one of his arms instead of a stuffed animal and tucked her head under his chin.

"Woah, woah," he said, but he didn't push her away, "It's going to be okay." His free arm went around her protectively.

He stroked her hair until her sobs became little whimpers. She'd gotten his shirt wet, but he didn't seem to mind. She had such good friends. Friends that let her move in with them and take up space they had lived in. Friends who put up with her neurotic ways and overflowing tears. Nothing could take them away from her, not time or space or inspectors.

The hell ride was over and she was tired. Crying had taken it out of her and the morning light was bright in the window. The gentle thump of Troy's heart was the last thing she remembered before she just gave up and let herself fall asleep.