Oh my god. I'm so sorry guys. I'm sorry this is so short and I'm sorry this is so long and I'm sorry that you may hate Sollux forever after I finish writing this story arc. I PROMISE that I will continue this, it's just that school has been really intense lately and has been eating up all of my time.
Fuck my mess of a life. Seriously, just fuck it. Aradia is here? What even happened? I mean, she's obviously crazy, but not like people here! It has to be my fault. I shouldn't have taken advantage of her like I did. Aradia was innocent, that's why I was drawn to her. She was quiet and innocent and pure and I hurt her.
My mind can't help but flash back to what happened. It was freshman year and I was going through this shitty 'discovering myself' phase. She clung to me and we ended up dating. It was all very adorably cliché, and then I fucked everything up. As per usual. My mildly racing thoughts play over our brief stint. An even more socially awkward me, and the girl I broke beyond repair.
The worst part about it is that she still loves me. The young lady I dated, fucked as a test, and then broke up with is in love with me and I can't feel that back. I really don't feel that bad about it either. I do feel like shit for not feeling bad through, but I just cant. Some nights I stay up wondering if I am evil. I was young though, right? We all make mistakes… Or at least, that's what I tell myself when I think of her.