Hellooo happy readers! Fall is upon us! How fast has this summer gone?

5,000 points to Sunshine-Midnight123 and LoveMeant2BE! Guessing is exciting!

Here is 10! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I disclaim! I don't own anything televised or even cliffnotes... it's a sad day...

Casey felt very accomplished. She'd done laundry, stuck dough in her bread maker, unloaded a dishwasher, found her son's missing stuffed zebra, and planned meals for the week with color coded recipe cards that organized the preparation and cooking times in accordance with how much time she would have after work. It was very efficient. And this was all done while coddling a delicate friendship.

Casey could tell Emily was impatient. She was trying to absorb everything and fight how offended she was that Casey hadn't told her. She wanted the whole story, but was having a hard time hearing the whole thing, because maybe their significance wasn't apparent. Maybe she should have given Emily some Cliffnotes or a general synopsis. Casey wanted Emily to understand her. Needed her desperately to get why it was this way. Because friendship was a valuable thing that she had a harder time convincing herself she deserved.

Even sitting quietly as Emily picked through her house to a new private spot to chat, Casey felt elated and relieved that Emily hadn't written her off as insane yet. As some people in her life were wont to do. Casey shook her head of that and waited. Finally settling on a solid question, Emily interrupted the silence that had enveloped the phone line.

"Okay, so, if everything was coming up roses, what made you fight?"

"Oh, everything! We were still the same people; the fighting would never be over for good. God, we still fight! We had just added in sporadic kissing moments to our habitual interactions."

"Okay, so, why didn't you tell anyone?" Casey gave Emily a look, even if she couldn't see her. Casey would have thought that this was the question that most explained itself.

"It's not exactly the type of thing one boasts about. He was very off-limits. And I'm a limit type of girl. But it was an addiction. I didn't try to think about anything outside the two of us, and instead thought of how to keep more of him to myself." Emily made a noise that sounded both confused and sympathetic. Years of crushing on Derek must have familiarized her with the feeling.

"I feel so stupid. I should have seen this coming. Instead I went on and on about him."

"No, it's okay!" Casey assured her. "I worried that all of my stories suddenly involved him."

"You just never said anything."

"We didn't say anything to anyone. And it wasn't like we were lying to people about it," Emily pulled a face, "we just didn't say anything. We didn't not tell people, if that makes sense." Casey listened as Emily was quiet for a second, making only small tutting noises. Casey didn't voice her own suspicion, in the event that Emily took it as a lie as well. For a while, she thought that maybe neither of them said anything because they both knew that their relationship had potential. A sort of kinetic energy that could create a physical element in their affair somewhere down the line. .

She swallowed that thought, but shared another. The reason she'd fed herself when her conscience would send up red flags. "I thought it wouldn't matter. In the long run. I wasn't the type of girl he usually went for, and he had a track record. He'd date someone for a while, and then get bored or annoyed, and move on. I'd taken this as evidence and drew the conclusion that this was a phase; something we had to get out of our systems. It eventually wouldn't matter."

"And how did that work out?"

"Not well."

"Did you yell at him?"

"Yes. But I didn't know how much of it was anger directed at him and how much was anger at myself."

"Wow. It must have been a really bad fight to be this important."

"My logic caught up with my hormones. I thought about it. And kept thinking. And then started to feel guilty."

"Guilty? All of a sudden? I don't buy that. What happened?"

"My mother asked about my personal life. She wanted to set me up with someone."

"Uh-oh."

"So, I took the guilt of not saying anything to her out on him."

Casey shoved past Derek into the living room of his apartment. It smelled like boys; food, hockey, cologne. But luck was on her side, and it didn't look like his roommate was home. Derek looked confused as he shut the door and turned to her.

"Are we dating?" she asked, her hands on her hips, too caught up to use the customary greeting. She stood in the middle of the rug, between Derek and a coffee table, waiting.

"What?" Derek looked taken aback by the subject, obviously not expecting that type of question.

"Are we dating? Is that what we're doing?" She gestured between them.

"Why? Did Kelsey let you have your label-maker back?" He crossed his arms over his chest as his eyebrows narrowed.

He didn't like labels and definitions. He'd told Casey they were what they were. Which really didn't mean anything. She wasn't putting up with that nonsense any longer.

"No, but I want to know." He looked at her for a long moment, but she didn't break his gaze. She was poised to do battle. Then he shrugged.

"I dunno."

"You don't know?"

"Nah," he shook his head, his arms still crossed, "never really thought about it."

"You haven't thought about it?"

"Not really. Is there an echo in here, or something?"

"Derek," she started, not really sure where she wanted to go with her thought. She knew she was freaking out. Her mother was obviously trying to help her, but had nearly given her a myocardial infarction when she mentioned her dating life. Or apparent lack thereof.

It was what she couldn't tell her mother that about killed her. The stolen kisses and date nights seemed harmless, except when they collided with the big picture and Casey saw how selfish they had been.

But her one week of summer and the first month of the term had been surreal. They made time for each other and he'd held her hand on campus. It had been weeks of making out then fighting, or going to a movie then fighting and then making out, or studying then making out then taking a walk and then fighting. It was weirdly comfortable and she thoroughly enjoyed his company. Craved it, really.

She looked around his apartment. Boxes were stacked up near the door to his bedroom. He was packing. He was going to New York anyway. So this conversation didn't even matter. He was leaving. And she was an adult; she could do what she wanted.

She ran a hand through her hair, and Derek stepped closer.

"What's up?" He put his hands on her arms and looked at her.

"It's just my mom and-"

"Can I distract you?"

"What?" Derek stepped into her and, before she could protest, he had pressed his mouth to hers. He was a fabulous kisser. Every time, she felt lightheaded and rooted to the spot; she couldn't have moved if she wanted to. And she didn't. She wanted to stay put and not think. Her body moved into his without her permission. Then she heard her mother in her mind and immediately moved away. Derek looked more confused than anything else as he watched her plop onto the couch.

"Okay, now what's up?" He walked toward her.

"I can't. I can't do this anymore."

"What? B&Es? I'd say that is a solid career move, Princess. You're a tad chatty."

"No, God, Derek. This. With you? I can't keep," she shoved her hair out of her face. This was not going to go well. "Doing this. We're lying. We're lying to each other, I'm lying to my mother, to our family, and you're still leaving, Der." She looked up at him and immediately wished she hadn't. He looked perplexed and pained as he sat next to her, trying to follow her line of thought.

"Case, we knew I was leaving from the beginning."

"So, what have we been doing then? Just biding our time? Waiting for the next thrill to come along?" Derek flinched. She knew she was being unfair. But she was terrified. What if her infatuation with him was more than that? If their relationship got any more serious, they would probably have to start telling people. And this wasn't a relationship where that would be easy. It was more like something to hide away and pretend never happened. "Are we just messing around for something to do?" Derek vaulted off the couch.

"No, Casey, God! I'm not biding my time with you, or using you because I'm bored, Jesus Christ! Is that what you're doing with me? Because then maybe New York isn't far enough away!"

Casey stood, too. He didn't get to yell down at her. "Then what are we doing, Derek?" She jabbed a finger into his chest. "My mom keeps trying to set me up and I can't exactly tell her why I feel like I can't go because we're supposed to be related—"

"We're not related—"

"I'm not saying that's how it turned out, but we are supposed to be related according to normal society—"

"Fuck society—" He moved around the table so they were yelling over it.

"Don't use that word, Derek," she scolded. He wasn't listening to her. And they were getting louder. Casey prayed the neighbors were out.

"I don't give a fuck about 'supposed to be's,' Case." His voice was softer, but no warmer.

"Derek," she reprimanded again, almost a warning.

"I like being happy, and, right now, that kind of involves you."

"Right now?" she shrieked.

"Seriously? That's what you pick out of what I said?"

"Yes! Derek, I can't do this for a 'right now' kind of ending. There's too much as stake between us. Our family, our friends—" She blinked back angry tears.

"I don't care about—"

"But I do, Derek." Tears escaped her eyelashes. "I still need that kind of comfort, that kind of support. We need to give this up. We can't," she struggled to find the right word, "see each other. Socially. Anymore."

"Fuck me," Derek mumbled, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "So, you're just going to leave it there?"

"We have to," she said, keeping her voice solid. She used her fingers to wipe at her cheeks.

"If this is one of your games, Princess, I'm not playing. I'm not Sam or Max or whoever else you ran with in high school. This is it."

Casey took a deep, steadying breath. She was offended, but was going to win. She was going to be the bigger person and do what was right. "I know."

He stepped away from her, his posture defeated. "Fine, Casey. You'll feel like shit later, but go do what you want."

"I plan on it," she bit back, angry that he appeared so calm. "Knowing you, you'll do the same," she pulled the door open, "good luck in the States, Der," and slammed it closed behind her. The idea that he could easily replace her overwhelmed her for a moment. It stung; a sharp, hot pain. A loud crash brought her back to the hallway. She heard Derek yell behind the door, and practically ran from his apartment.

"Holy crap," Emily breathed.

"Yeah," Casey winced, "I was mean."

"No kidding, I mean, this explains Christmas more than you telling me about Christmas ever could. God, he was such an asshole that night."

"Yeah, he does that."

"The asshole thing?"

"No, the 'take my feelings out on everyone' thing."

"You weren't much better, missy."

"What?"

"Oh, come on, the screaming and the crying. Drama, drama, drama! That night had more going on than a bad assassin movie!"

"Yes. Yes, I remember well. I hadn't seen how much we'd adapted to each other."

"What, like in your 'natural habitats?'" Casey rolled her eyes.

"The boy took me to see film festival movies, for goodness sake!"

"Okay, yeah, that's a little," there was a pause over the line, "unexpected."

"As was the realization that he might have been right. Which was hard enough to fathom, so his behavior didn't help."

"God, he was horrible, but now we know why." Emily was quiet. "You broke his heart."

And there you have it, folks! We're into double digits! Let me know what you think!

Let's say 1,000 points to guessers about Christmas? Who doesn't love the holidays!? :)