The smell of armadillo stew tickled his nose and Daryl lifted his head to look over at the small pot boiling away on the one-burner. Beth had painstakingly prepared the meal all morning, throwing in the last of her spices to make it a special one for their last day in the logging community. He watched the girl for a moment, flirting with her husband as they moved around each other in the corner of the room that had been designated as a kitchen. Carl had grown into one hell of a badass, but he seemed to go all soft around Beth, always kissing her shoulder and wrapping his arms around her. Daryl rolled his eyes at the display and relocated them to the middle of the room so he could check on Judith.
The little girl had been sitting with Maggie and Ben for most of the morning, mostly watching the mother and son play with one another. She seemed reluctant to engage in their little game of tickling and make-believe, though she was eager to observe silently.
"He can't do talking," Judith observed, her voice holding an air of disappointment.
Maggie looked up in surprise. This was the first time that Judith had addressed her directly since their meeting. "He can a little bit. He is little so he is still learning."
Judith squinted at the explanation. "I could talk better," she looked down at Maggie's hands, her hair falling over her shoulders. "Could he count?"
Maggie shook her head. "No," she answered carefully, looking Judith over dubiously. "He's still little," she reiterated.
The girl frowned and turned away from Maggie to inspect Ben, who was placing unsharpened pencils into a cup as he chatted to his impromptu toys, his utterances a mixture of real words and babble. Judith crawled forward and snatched a pencil and then another, then sat back on her feet. "I could try that there," she pointed to the cup.
"When Ben is finished then you can have a try," Maggie told her, turning her eyes back to supervise her son. "You have to wait for your turn."
Judith looked to Daryl, her features a mixture of exasperation and confusion. Before he could respond she reached forward again and plucked the cup out of Ben's hands. The baby's loud protest made her freeze and she looked at him with the same expression that she had given Daryl moments before. "Shhh, the Walkers is gonna come," she objected.
"Judith, you can't just take things from people!" Maggie's voice rose as she reached for the small girl.
Alarmed as Maggie's hand closed around her forearm Judith reached out, wide-eyed- and jabbed the woman in the throat with her fingers. Maggie released her hold on the four-year-old and her hands flew to her windpipe as she gasped for air. She watched Judith's eyes flick to Daryl and fill with panic when the little girl realized that she couldn't get to him without passing between Maggie and Ben. Quickly she darted backwards and towards the next closest person. She collided with Rick's chest and threw her arms around him as she scampered onto his lap. The map he had been looking at was crushed between them and he looked to Daryl uncertainly for a moment before securing his arms around his daughter.
Maggie and Daryl both sprang to their feet simultaneously, their faces equally outraged.
"What the hell were ya thinkin' grabbin' 'er like that!" Daryl barked, taking a threatening step towards Maggie who bent down to pick up her wailing son.
With Ben held closely to her chest she stroked the back of his head to soothe him. "Me? This isn't the first time she's acted outta line with Ben, Daryl." The young mother looked to her husband for support. Glenn had already crossed the few feet to his wife's side and wrapped his arms around her biceps in an attempt to diffuse her anger.
"She ain't used ta bein' yelled at like that," Daryl defended Judith, clenching his hands at his sides, his fingers curled into tight fists.
"You mean she ain't used to bein' in civilized company," Maggie shifted Ben onto her other hip.
"I don't need to listen to this bullshit," Daryl leaned down to pick up his coat. "Judith, c'mere. We're gonna go fer a walk."
Judith leaned back from Rick, her hands sliding over his shoulders to rest on his chest. Her eyes met his matching ones and she held his unwavering gaze, her mouth pulled into a straight line. Slowly, she lifted her hand and pressed it to his cheek as her head tilted.
"Judith, now!" Daryl ordered her again, holding her coat out to her.
The little girl complied and slid off Rick's lap with care, then made her way over to Daryl, her stare fixed on Maggie with distrust. Daryl was already moving towards the door while at the same time helping her put her coat on. They paused at the door so that she could slide her feet into her boots and collect Beanie.
"Daryl," Rick said his name so softly that he barely heard it. Daryl half-turned to see the other man get to his feet, "You'll bring her back, right?"
With a curt nod he stomped outside, Judith's hand closed inside his.
XXXX
"Where we're going?" Judith asked, running to keep up with his long strides, Beanie secured under one arm. When he didn't answer her she sighed and slowed down until she was stopped. "I ain't gonna walk no more," she told him decidedly, sitting down in the snow.
"Let's go- now," he said, coming to a stop. He turned around to look down at her as she shook her head defiantly. "Judith, I ain't kiddin' around. Let's go, y'hear?"
She remained stoic as she crossed her arms in front of her, Beanie held to her chest. The snow created a white cushion around her as she looked up at him, strands of hair glued to her lips with moisture.
"You wanna go back there?" He asked, shifting his stance so that his weight was resting on his back foot. When she didn't respond he grumbled. "Fine. That's just fine. You go back then. Go!" He pointed in the direction that they had come, their footprints in the snow a map that would lead her back to the camp.
Slowly, Judith got to her feet, the snow clumped and clinging to her jeans. She turned around to look in the direction that he was pointing and then back to him, her face flickering with uncertainty. Finally she turned her back to him and began to follow their trail, her boots crunching in the snow.
Daryl watched her retreating back and felt himself deflate. Her abandonment stung him and he felt an overwhelming rush of anger at her betrayal. "Fine," he muttered, hardening himself against the emotions that whipped through him like he'd been elbowed in the chest. He trudged away from the scene, burying his hands in his pockets.
He'd barely made it a few feet before he felt a tug at his sleeve. Turning around he lowered his gaze to find glassy blue eyes looking up at him, framed by dark lashes that had become branches cradling shimmering droplets. He dropped to his knees so that he was at eye-level with her, his own eyes stinging with tears. Her small mitten-covered hand rose to rest against his cheek, the frayed wool clinging to his stubble like Velcro.
She held his eyes for a moment before she slid her arms around his neck. "You gotted mad," Judith murmured, resting her cushioned cheek on his shoulder.
"Nah, I ain't mad," he sniffed shortly. "I'm scared I'm gonna lose you," he explained, his throat tightening like a fist.
Judith pulled back at his words, her face lighting up with a smile, so innocent that it made his heart ache all the more. "Y'all can't lost me," she giggled, her once wet eyes glimmering not with tears now, but with enchantment. "I could run real fast."
Daryl's breath rushed from his chest with a sudden puff of air that was almost a laugh. "C'mere," he sat back in the snow, ignoring the cold that penetrated the thick fabric of his jeans. Judith landed on his lap, her small hands bracing themselves on his chest so that they wouldn't collide heads. He pushed her bangs back from her face and tucked them up underneath her hat.
"Daryl," Judith sighed, her face dropping into a pout.
He felt concerned at her sudden shift in mood. "What?"
"What means waitin' fer yer turn?" she asked.
Daryl thought about the question before answering. "Mean ya just can't have things when ya want 'em all the time. Ya gotta let other folks go first, then you can take yer turn. Like…" he wracked his brain. "Like when ya both gotta take a piss, but someone's gotta keep watch fer Walkers."
She sighed again, shaking her head solemnly. "I sure don't like waitin' fer my turn."
This time he did laugh as he pulled her to his chest for a hug.
XXXX
The trailer was thick with underlying tension when Daryl and Judith stepped back inside. He pushed the little girl ahead of him, urging her forward so that he could close the door behind them, though she remained pressed to his leg, he cheek resting against the outside seam of his pants. Kneeling down next to her Daryl unzipped her coat and helped her take her boots off while avoiding looking at the room's other occupants. Judith kept her balance by resting her hands on his shoulders as he eased the dripping boots off her feet and then set them next to the door.
When she lingered at his side he gave her a gentle shove forward toward the centre of the room. With a last reluctant glance up at him she skipped quickly over to where Ben was toddling around, passing underneath the hammock that barely brushed his black hair. He'd picked up a shirt that he held in both hands and he gummed the sleeve leaving it damp with drool. Daryl watched Judith crouch down to pick up the cup and pencils that the toddler had been playing with, then go to the furthest wall where she took a seat cross-legged, Beanie tucked into her lap.
He had just finished hanging up his soaked and dripping coat on the hook next to the door when Maggie approached him, her hands clasped in front of her. She glanced at her husband who was looking over the map on the couch with a slump-shouldered Rick.
"Look- sorry about that whole thing," she began, and then stopped, taking a step back to accommodate him as he brushed past her to go to Judith. He kept his eyes forward, not ready to engage in any more of her insults or accusations. "Are you gonna talk this out with me? Or are we going to just keep giving each other the cold shoulder 'til one of us snaps and kills the other in their sleep?" Her voice was loaded with impatience and she huffed.
Daryl paused mid-step and turned to look at her over his shoulder. He'd had every attention of stone-walling her for the rest of the day- the century maybe. Maggie's face remained deadpan and she held her body rigid under his inspection. After a moment she lifted one shoulder arrogantly. "I don't want to be apologizing to you anymore than you want to hear it-," she said simply.
"Then we understand each other," he spat, his body tense as he felt like everyone was watching him out of the corner of their eyes. He hated her arrogance but he respected it- at least she had a code that she stood by. Even if it made her look like a jackass most of the time.
"But," Maggie raised her voice enough to command his attention again. "We're kind of stuck in this together, so we may as well make the best of it. Besides, I get it, okay?" She crossed her arms over her chest and settled on one foot. "I'm a mama bear. And if anyone messes with my cub I will take them down." Her green eyes shifted to her son for a second, her eyes softening before meeting his again. "I think you're a little like that too."
"Judith weren't gonna do nothin' to him," Daryl muttered, his fists relaxing as some of the tension left his body. "So I ain't the one you gotta be sorry to."
She nodded stiffly and looked around him at Judith, who was cramming her cloth doll inside the cup head first, her baby-teeth sinking into her lower lip with determination. Maggie raised both her eyebrows at the scene and shook her head with amusement. She met Daryl's eyes again and then sighed heavily before ambling over to the little girl. When she was a few feet away she crouched down, careful to keep her distance.
Judith looked up at her, then to Daryl who had taken the spot on the couch on the other side of Rick. He offered her a nod of reassurance then averted his eyes from her to the map where Glenn was drawing a line with his finger, though he listened in on the exchange between the woman and child, prepared to intervene if necessary.
"Sorry I grabbed you and yelled at you," Maggie began uncomfortably, her fingers forming a steeple in front of her. "Do you think we can be friends?" The question sounded uncertain and Daryl wanted to roll his eyes at her hypocrisy in accusing him at being shit with kids.
Judith pulled Beanie free from the cup and held it out to Maggie. "Yer meanin' ya' want this here?"
Maggie shook her head, her smile small and tight. "Nah, you play with it for now. But maybe Ben will want a turn again later." She tilted her head back to look at the ceiling. "I can't believe I am apologizing to a child," she mumbled, then took a deep breath. The small girl gave her another confused look and put the cup down in the space between them. "Maybe you can say sorry to me for punching me. That… hurt." Her fingers reached up to touch the spot where Judith had jabbed her.
Judith looked to Daryl again. When he didn't respond to her check-in she returned her gaze to Maggie. "I ain't sure what'cha mean," she picked up Beanie and held her to her chest, her arms crossing over in front of the doll.
Maggie thought for a moment. "It means you feel bad for hurting someone."
Judith pushed herself up the wall using her legs and took a long step around the crouched woman. Keeping her eyes fixed on her, she shook her head slowly. "I ain't," she said simply making her way over to where Daryl. She slid her arms around his neck and climbed onto his lap, her bony knees digging into his thighs. She settled there, her cheek resting against his chest as she listened to Glenn and Rick negotiate their travel route. Daryl answered her indignant look with an unaffected shrug and turned his attention to the map again, his hand resting on Judith's back.
"Well that went well," Maggie mumbled to Beth as she leaned against the desk next to where her sister was dishing out their meal into plastic bowls. She rolled her eyes toward the ceiling, drumming her fingernails on the veneer finish. "She is a mini Daryl Dixon if I ever saw one."
Beth looked up at her big sister, her blue eyes filled with patience and understanding. "Remember the first time you tried to feed her? And you weren't sure how to hold the bottle?" she asked, her voice steady and kind. At Maggie's nod she continued. "It's kind of like that. You just gotta learn how to hold the bottle."
Maggie huffed again and trudged over to sit next to her husband.
Beth passed around the bowls of strew, proudly presenting the food to each member of the group individually. Daryl accepted his and Judith's with a thankful nod. He waited until the little girl was settled and then passed her the bowl. She stayed in her spot on his lap, using his chest as a backrest and her knees as a table. Daryl kept a careful eye on her as she ate, mindful that she didn't spill the hot contents of the bowl onto herself.
As he ate his own food he tried to remember when he'd last had something so carefully prepared and delicious. He got as far back as the prison when Carol had been the main cook on duty. His mouth watered between each bite and he shoveled it back quickly.
After their meal they packed they their things and prepared to leave. Daryl folded the hammock into a tight package and secured it to his pack using bungee cords.
Judith had laid her clothes out on the floor in a straight line and then meticulously rolled them before packing them into her bag. "Does he go'ed in a bag?" She asked Maggie, her eyes settled curiously on Ben, who had fallen asleep, his cheek resting on his mother's thigh. "Beanie could go'ed in my pack."
"No, I carry him," Maggie answered, running her fingers over her son's hair. "Why did you name your baby Beanie?"
Judith inspected her doll. "It ain't a baby. Is a Beanie. That one are a baby," she pointed to the napping toddler.
"Judith, why don't I braid your hair before we go?" Beth suggested, falling back heavily onto the couch with a sigh, her hand rubbing the curve of her belly. She waived off Carl's concerned expression and pointed to the spot on the floor before her. Judith, who had been pulling out the contents of the front pouch of her bag, nodded and walked over to the young woman, the pack of hairbands clutched in her fingers.
She kneeled down on the floor where Beth had indicated, flicking her long hair behind her. Daryl watched curiously as she fiddled with the things in her hands, almost nervously. He bit his tongue before asking her what she was thinking about in case it was something that Rick didn't want to hear. The thick paper flicked under her thumb as she watched Rick out of the corner of her eye. When Beth tapped her shoulder she placed a purple band into the pregnant woman's palm to secure the braid before getting to her feet.
Instead of returning to her packing she stopped in front of her father, her sock covered toes touching his. He looked up from the weapons and ammo that he had been sorting, surprise registering on his face. The look intensified when Judith thrust the papers in her hand out to him.
"You could see 'em if ya want," she offered quietly.
Rick swallowed and carefully accepted the photos from her hand, his movements slow as a bird watcher, as though he was nervous to scare her away. He flipped the pictures over and peered at the image of his wife for the first time in years. His eyes welled and he tilted his head. "God," he muttered, his voice ruptured. "Look at her…"
Judith placed one hand on his knee and leaned over to see the picture too. "That there is my ma," she explained. "She were'd a real pain in the ass, but she loved me. You know'ed that?"
Rick laughed and looked to Daryl for a moment. "That's true," he swiped at his cheeks with a shaking hand. "Most of it."
"That there is my pa," she pointed to the much younger and fresher version of Rick. "I were sure lucky ta come from his stock."
"Do you," Rick hesitated. "Do you want to sit with me and look at these together for a bit?"
Judith shook her head and took the pictures back, causing Rick's posture to fall. Turning around she headed back to her backpack. "We could later. We gotta pack now, y'hear?"
Tense laughter resounded in the room and Daryl realized that he hadn't been the only one watching the exchange on bated breath. On her way past him Judith's hand lingered on Daryl's cheek before she kneeled beside him and put her pictures away.
From opposite sides of the room the two men's eyes met- then they returned to their work.
The small group bundled up warmly and gathered around the doorway, Ben curled into his father's side. Judith tugged on Daryl's sleeve and he looked down at her as the others began to filter out into the early afternoon. "I don't need no carryin'," she informed him, sliding her hand into his.
Daryl squeezed her fingers through her mittens and nodded. The pair followed Beth out onto the porch and he did a sweep of the immediate area before starting down the steps. Carl had hung back, leaning against the railing, his hands tucked into his pockets. Daryl was surprised when he didn't immediately fall into step with his wife. Instead, he reached out to stoutly grasp Daryl's arm.
The two men didn't speak right away, and Daryl was about to pull himself free before the Carl shrugged and allowed the crossbow that had been settled on his shoulder to slide free. The strap caught in his elbow and he jerked it up into his hands then held the weapon out. He shrugged indifferently, dismissing Daryl's reluctant expression. "I call dibs on the next cool weapon we find."
Daryl accepted the bow and slipped it onto his back, the weight of it comfortable and familiar. "We'll see about that," he offered Carl a nod and pushed off after the group, Judith's hand still closed around his.
Carl strode past him, moving swiftly over the packed snow, his face tucked into the collar of his coat. Daryl watched him for a moment before pulling his own handgun out of his pocket. He whistled, causing the other man to stop and half-turn. Daryl tossed him the weapon, "Until you find somethin' better."
