A/N- Hey! So here's the next update. Thanks for all the lovely reviews...I know this is a ridiculously angsty story and the chapters are super short but...hey, I do have a life other than Fanfiction. True, it's not much of one but I still need to take care of it. Anyway, here's the next chapter, I hope you enjoy cause we start getting into Rose vs. Janine a bit. In case you're wondering about the quotes at the beginning, that's just my cynical mind spitting out what comes naturally. Well, this should be fun and I'm not going to bore you to tears so...Review!
Learning to Love-Chapter Three
"They say to love like you'll never be hurt...But what happens if you are?"
A tweet. A chirp. A fledgling's feathers are beginning to grow. In a few weeks, he will be ready to fly. It is summer now; the trees are in full-out bloom, the landscape transformed into a lush green. He tries a tune, full of expectation and promise. His nestmates soon join in. Together they sing.
Below him, a girl waits on a staircase. Her expectations have long since failed her, promises broken for far too long.
All parents leave their mark on their children. Some spoil, some stretch, and some break. At eight years old, Rose has learned this truth all too well. It had been four years since Janine Hathaway left her child on the imposing doorstep of the academy. She had not looked back since.
The first time her mother came to visit, Rose waited all night and all morning to see her. Her mother was on time and waiting with open arms. Back then, Rose lived her days craving those visits, drifting through the days till the next one. But they began to grow far and few as Janine immersed herself further into her work.
Rose waited a full week, teeming with anticipation to see her mother. Janine arrived late and only had time to give Rose a quick and rushed hug. Still, Rose treasured that hug for months to come. Now, almost a year later, Rose sat on the church steps waiting for her mother.
A shadow made her look up; Alberta stood before her. One look at her face told Rose what she needed to know. Janine Hathaway was not coming. The apologetic expression on Alberta's face only made it worse as Rose got up to leave the chapel. On her exit, Alberta's hand caught her wrist.
"Rose, I'm sure she's just busy. She'll be here for the next time," Alberta said weakly. A glance at Rose made it perfectly clear that she wasn't convincing anyone. Rose simply shrugged her hand off and turned back towards the empty dorms. She flopped down on her bed and cried bitterly for the remainder of the day.
As the new dawn broke, so did Rosemarie's heart. As the sun rose, she promised herself that these would be the last tears she ever shed for her mother. And so, Rose stopped waiting for her mother. She stopped looking forward to those visits, stopped caring about the updates the guardians sometimes gave her if they were in the mood.
When Janine arrived at the academy the following year to check in on Rose, she was surprised to find an empty room greeting her. When she inquired later, she was informed by an apologetic Alberta that Rose had left two days earlier with Valissa Dragomir on their family vacation. There was no doubt in Janine's mind that Rose had known her mother was visiting. Rose just simply no longer cared.
Janine Hathaway had left a very special mark on her child. As Rose grew older, she began to seal off her heart from all others who could cause it potential harm. Janine Hathaway had taught Rose that love only equaled disappointment. And Rose was sick and tired of being let down.
Loving someone was like giving them the means to destroy you but trusting them not to. Life had shown Rose that she couldn't trust anyone with her heart, not even her own mother.
A chirp. A tweet. It is fall again, the trees are going bare and two birds have outgrown their nest. A fledgling's feathers have grown at last; he is ready to learn to fly. He will do this on his own; his mother is long since gone. Still, the thought of her cannot damper this moment. He lines up, toeing the wall and soars off it. A steady plummet later and he loses his nerve. Luckily, instinct works to recover what he lacks and his wings catch the air. He floats, and then hesitantly flaps. He calls to his friend, the only other surviving nestmate. They are flying! He opens his mouth to taste the air. Together they sing.
Below the nest, two girls stumble drunkenly through the orange-gold carpet that coats St. Vladamir's. Leaves rustle as they walk, one pair of steps louder than the other.
"Rose!" Lissa squeals as Rose clutches her arm gently. There is no question that Lissa is wasted, her slurred speech is enough indication. Rose sighs, and begins to guide Lissa back to her dormitory. This is only one of many nights to follow with the same monotonous schedule. End of classes means, for most, party-time. The two of them will sneak out and get drunk, Lissa far more than Rose. At sixteen, Rose is rising to her sense of duty, remaining partially sober to protect Lissa.
But that same sense is overshadowed by the clouds of bitterness that has fogged her view of guarding. Janine's example had made it very clear to Rose that they came first, even before Rose. And so, Rose makes every effort to flout this belief in her own way. She acts out; she disobeys the rules. Janine's actions have molded her daughter's.
Lissa reaches up to straighten Rose's collar which has bunched up on one side. She fails and trips over a tree root. "So who is it this time? Dane Volkov? I saw you an' him talking earlier," She slurs. Rose gives her a snide look.
"No one, if your highness must know. He wouldn't shut up about himself. How am I supposed to enjoy kissing someone if their mouth won't stop moving?" She says with a snort. It is no secret to either girl that Rose has not lasted in a relationship with anyone for more than a week. Lissa's naivety convinces her that Rose is just having fun. Rose knows better. She will not trust anyone with her heart. The romantic flings remind her that she is unattached, free from the pain that comes along with a broken heart.
"You don't have to kiss. I'm sure there are other ways you can spend your time," She suggests with a wiggle of her eyebrows. The innuendo does not go unnoticed by Rose who rolls her eyes, a gesture that goes unnoticed by Lissa.
"I'm not you and Aaron. Besides, I don't need to get some to keep me happy," Rose says in a carefree manner, a slight jibe at Aaron who has been complaining lately. Lissa scowls, the alcohol working to make her brave.
"Yeah? Well, at least I get some," Lissa bites back, glare apparent. A gust of wind blows, carrying away Rose's response to the comeback. Their pattering steps fade into the distance. As far as the two girls know, tomorrow's hangover is the worst they will have to face this school year. But their problems are just beginning.
In the shadows, a connection is stirring as the bond begins to take hold. Already, Rose is feeling the effects, flashes of Lissa's emotions in strange scenarios. She brushes it aside; god knows she doesn't need any more problems to deal with. But she cannot run from her fears for long. In the dormitories, a teacher paces; her carpets have worn away from paranoia. And in the distance, a bird caws. A raven is calling for her young.