Chapter 6

It was early Monday morning, Erik had just arrived at his office and handed his secretary a stack of papers to be delivered to the Baron within a few days. She took the stack and went to fetch his morning cup of tea.

"You have a client waiting in your office." She said politely, he felt confused. He never took clients on Mondays; those were his days to concentrate on his sketches.

"Mary, I didn't schedule any clients, especially on a Monday." He said politely as she began to go into the other room and make his tea.

"You didn't, but a young misses came in and said she had an urgent appointment with you. Certainly you know who I am talking about. She wouldn't give me a name." Erik figured it out instantly and replied coolly,

"Yes, it did slip my mind. Her husband couldn't attend, he is ill with something so she requested to see me instead. Thank you Mary, this is quite an important account, so I'll just skip my tea for now." She gave him a strange look, for he never skipped his morning tea. Sighing with how strange this day had already become, she sat back down and began to look through the stack of papers before mailing them off.

Erik walked down the hall to his office, thank goodness it was the last one and their conversation could be private. Taking in a deep breath, he adjusted his cravat and caught sight of his wedding ring, he couldn't and wouldn't do anything he would regret. Clearing his throat he opened the door and shut it behind him. Christine sat in a small chair and stood up at his presence.

"Madam, it's so nice to see you again." He said politely.

"Hello Erik." She said nervously, "I have come to see you as you can see. You gave me your card and I figured we could catch up on things." He put his hand up to silence her as he brought his leather bag around his desk and drawing table. Placing it on the drawing table, he sat down behind the desk facing her and said,

"You don't need to explain, I was kind of hoping you would come here." Her eyes brightened up a bit and she asked,

"Really?" He sighed and answered,

"Well yes. It has been so long since I have seen you. I have thought about you all weekend, and I just am so happy that I got to see you again. The last time I saw you, things were so…terrible. I was a madman. I can't truly apologize enough for my behavior, and I sometimes know that even though I seem like a changed man on the outside, I still have those inner demons that have tormented me my entire life. God, why am I even revealing any of this to you?!" Christine sat silent and pursed her lips together.

"We both have changed Erik." She said quietly, "I'm not the young girl I once was. You know that, the last time I saw you, you took the entire little girl I had left in me and made me a woman." Erik felt so guilty; he should have never let that happen. He should have never let passion take away what was so sacred to her. Her husband should have been the one to do that. He wondered for a minute if her husband even knew what she did with Erik the night before her wedding.

As if reading his thoughts, Christine broke the silence again and said,

"Raoul doesn't know about that, at least he has never said anything if he does. But speaking of that night, I have something I need to tell you. Something I hoped you already knew about since I thought you were dead. I talked to you every day as if it would make a difference, but here you are alive. But let me tell you, what I have to say to you is going to change your life forever. Not only yours but my entire family as well." Erik gulped, he had a feeling of what she was going to say, but he didn't want it to be true, for her sake, he didn't want it to be true.

"My son," she started and began to cry, "if only I would have known you were alive Erik, things would have been different. I would be with you, raising our son together. He's so smart, he's just like you, into everything. A little genius, well beyond his years." She put her head in her hands and started to cry. Erik's mind was racing, what was he going to do? What was the right thing to do? If there was truly a God, now would be a wonderful time for Him to show up. His stunned silence only made Christine cry harder,

"Is he, you know…" Erik started to ask searching for the right words. She wiped her tears and sniffed replying,

"No, he is flawless. Absolutely handsome." Erik took in another breath and stood up coming back around the desk and kneeling next to her chair. Looking up at her tear-stained face he asked in a whisper,

"What are we going to do? What do you want to do?"

"I don't know, I have no idea what is right and what is wrong! Raoul and Charles have a wonderful father/son relationship. The right thing to do is to tell them, but you have a child on the way and this could ruin your new reputation and mine as well."

"I don't care about me. I just want what is best for my son. Is it the best thing for him not to know? If it's what is best for him at this age, where children are cruel and mean and the world is an awful place for illegitimate children like him. Would it cause him a lot of pain to know or not know? These are questions that we have to ask ourselves. Maybe it's not up to us, maybe it's up to him."

"But he doesn't even know anything about you."

"Precisely, maybe he should figure it out on his own."

"What are you implying? I introduce the two of you. Yes that will go over well with my husband, you already know how he feels about you, let alone allowing my son to spend time with you as well."

"Well Christine, maybe it's about time you got a little sneaky instead of being so damned honest all the time. Maybe you should be out with him and run into me. See what he says, if anything. I do want to see him, I have that right. I only made half of him and didn't even know about him until right now. But I don't have the right to ruin his entire life." He said a little bold and standing up. She stood up with him and leaned into him,

"I just can't hide from you anymore. Do you know that ever since that night we shared together I have always thought about, always wondering in the back of my mind what would have happened if we would have been together? Didn't you ever wonder?" He stared down at her and let out a sight,

"Yes, I always wondered. I always thought about you, always wanted you but I knew you would be better off without me."

"But look at you now! You're married and established! That could have been me! Why did you pretend to die?! I know at the time I was young and foolish, but I did love you! Everyone always made my own mind and therefore I couldn't! Was it the right thing to be with Raoul? Maybe, but I always had felt something for you too! I never really wanted it to be over, but I got caught up in society and my whole world was telling me to do something else." She began to shake and cry again after just revealing a decade of emotions. He breathed in and out heavily,

"We lost each other; I never wanted it to be over either, hell it still isn't over." He grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her so hard and so deep, she lost all sensation except the feeling of the passionate kiss. He pressed against her lips and she reached up around his neck pushing her lips back against his as his tongue forced his way into her mouth. He pushed her backwards until her back was against the wall, continuing their passionate kisses.

"Stop." He said breathlessly stopping her next kiss, "What are we going to do?" She looked back at the passion firing in his eyes and said quietly,

"I don't know, we both are so committed to someone else."

"I love you, but I have a child coming. I feel like I am torn into two pieces. I want you, I have always wanted you. Our love, it never died. It was always there, it will always be there."

"I love you Erik. I want our love, but I have another love and you do too. I don't want us to be over, but I don't know what to do."

"We can't tell anybody…"

"No, we can't." She cut him off. He kissed her again and said,

"I'll be at White Swan tomorrow evening. I have a business meeting and I will remain after. I heard that Raoul is taking a trip to the countryside estate of Sandringham to meet with the King."

"News travels fast. Yes, he will be there for the remainder of the week."

"Come meet me tomorrow, and bring Charles. I will send word with what time under a false name." She nodded her head at his instructions,

"What about your wife?" She asked,

"I will take care of her. Don't worry." He said serious and businesslike. She kissed him once more, long and slow and pulled away,

"I will see you tomorrow."