Okay, two chapters in two days. I'm getting fast, heh. From now on, two friends of mine will be helping me with this story, SurpriseMeh and SmashingTonysk, giving me ideas, and perhaps beta'ing and giving me a reader's opinion. I think I'll do an occasional chapter, thanking all the people who review/favorite/follow. Oh, and for those of you who don't know, LEGO Mindstorms is LEGO's robotics line.

Chapter 3 : Of custard-armed robots and stolen cookies

Tony smiled. This really was his most innovative masterpiece so far.

Maria Hill blinked. How Tony Stark had managed to build a human sized robot in a kids' playroom escaped her. What eluded her even further was his method of procuring both the cookie jar, which they kept safely out of the Avengers' hands, and a fish. A living one. In the cookie jar that was full of water. On top of the robot, which he had apparently labeled 'JAR – FISH'. What angered her was that the cookies were nowhere to be seen, unless it was brown cookie crumbs that she spied on all the kids' lips. She checked her watch. Two-twenty. She sighed, thanking God that it was Coulson's turn to watch over them.

Coulson had been enjoying a Supernanny marathon, with popcorn, during a rare period free of work that did not involve guns, when Hill stormed in, visibly irritated and neatly plucked the popcorn bowl from his hands.

"Your shift."

Coulson sighed. He got up, paused the marathon, and left, stealing a handful of popcorn from what should have been his bowl. Wondering what the kids could have done to rile her ire so much, he turned back at the door to ask her when he saw that she had promptly fallen asleep in his armchair after flipping to a channel showing COPS. Smiling, he crept over, picked up the discarded bowl of popcorn and left after pausing the TV-computer thing that Stark used, closing the door on the way out. The Avengers had been deemed too unstable to be left on the helicarrier by the council, and all other afflicted agents had been ordered to a SHIELD ground base for testing, an order which Fury had promptly revoked. The Avengers had been transferred to Stark Tower the same day that Pym (with Janet in tow), Richards and McCoy had arrived at the helicarrier. Although they were all pretty serious scientists (apart from Janet), they had pretty much laughed their asses of at being briefed on the situation.

A handful of scientists, with Coulson, Hill and Sitwell (Who had volunteered to tag along after seeing Phil and Maria's crestfallen faces, for which the other two were infinitely grateful) had taken up residence at Stark Tower. He had no idea why Stark had a children's playroom, but he was grateful for it anyway. Pepper and Jane had had to be informed, but Pepper just sighed and told Phil that she would be back in a week from a world-wide business tour, stating that a break from Stark was a joy, even if he had been turned into a toddler. Jane had been initially worried, but, upon receiving a call from Pepper, decided that she too would arrive in a week's time with the other woman.

Finally reaching his destination, Coulson threw open the doors and gazed upon a scene that was the most humorous combination of destruction and … LEGO. Stark had, presumably using a LEGO Mindstorms set, managed to make a toddler – sized robot, using a lot of LEGO pieces. He had then stuck- Was that the cookie jar? Without any cookies? Damn the sneaky little blighters. He resumed his previous train of thought. Stark had attached the cookie jar … full of water being occupied by a … live fish? … where the robot's head would have been, and then labeled the moving structure 'JAR – FISH', as was evident from the A4 sized paper stuck on it's chest.

"JARVIS?"

"Yes, sir?"

"What's this?"

"Mr. Stark apparently found it ingenious to make a robot out of LEGO, and then attach a cookie jar with a living fish in it, to function as it's head, then label it 'JAR – FISH', no doubt in my honor."

Coulson wondered how Stark had managed to program JARVIS to be so pragmatically humorous, with the slightest bit of sarcasm. In fact, Stark had almost managed to allow JARVIS to speak like a human.

"What can you tell me about it?"

"Mr. Stark has hidden fifteen LEGO parts that fire rubber-tipped darts on various parts of it's body. He has also constructed three specialized LEGO cannons that he built himself, that fire the balls that come in Mindstorms sets."

Coulson knew it had been a bad idea to give them Mindstorms, even if it would make Stark shut up.

"One of these cannons has three barrels and that can fire one after another. The robot has all the sensors that came in the Mindstorms package, and all the ones that he asked you to order online."

'Asked', more like demanded.

"Mr. Stark has made a joystick remotely connected to the robot and has programmed it so that, one, it has a number of preset, common functions, like walking, two, can control the movement of all joints individually, and three, can utilize all weapons. He has also incorporated a pair of spinning Bionicle circular dull plastic blades on each wrist and a pair of hidden catapults on it's shoulders, that, when flipped out, can fire little bits of custard mixed with cookie crumbs. It can navigate itself, using the sensors, avoid obstacles, and trade out it's feet for wheels, and can balance itself through use of a gyroscope. He has programmed it to walk to the door and fire all weapons on it, claiming, "We'll get out of this prison yet, soldiers.""

Well, at least he knew where a bit of the cookies had gone. And anyway, they looked pretty happy, for prisoners. A sudden cheer made him look down into the playroom. The robot had gotten to it's feet, sloshing the water around inside it's head. Coulson now regretted showing them Megamind. The robot walked around the room a few times, and was impressed at what even a toddler Tony Stark could do. He quickly took out a thin, bar-like SHIELD standard camera, and snapped a few pictures, although he already had a ton of blackmail material, hoping that Tony would preserve it until tomorrow, when the scientists would arrive.

The front door opened. At Coulson's behest, JARVIS immediately brought up a screen on a wall, that showed Jasper in the lobby, asking Dummy to haul the humongous load of groceries, clothes and other whatnot to where it belonged.

In the playroom, the kids had begun a game of tag. Smiling, Coulson asked Jasper to come up to the playroom through his comm..