Total Drama Twist

by I Am TIAW

When Chris brings back 13 campers to the island for the most hilarious and drama-filled season ever, awesomeness will abound! All your favorite characters are back and better than ever. Friendships, romances, alliances, betrayals, conflicts, and, uh, squirrels? It's all here on the fan-fiction you won't want to miss, Total, Drama, Twist! Currently being redone.

10. I'm Bad with Titles

Episode 10: I'm Bad With Titles

Presenting the newest episode of TDTIR. This is a fun one, so please review! I want to hear who you want to get eliminated, who you want to win, what conflicts/pairings/friendships you want to see, and just any suggestions you have. Also, check out my profile page poll and vote on who you want to win! I've also managed to reach 1.5K views and 75K words, which for me is quite an accomplishment. Anyway, on with the story!

(Camera show Chris standing on the Dock of Shame)

Chris: Last time, on Total Drama The Island Reborn, the contestants got up bright and early for a visit to the confessional. Some of them revealed some juicy secrets, like Noah's plan to use 'drastic measures' and Zeke and Dawn's weird feelings for each other. Others, like Staci, just blabbed on and wasted Total Drama's precious screen-time. After that, we started a fun race through the woods. The contestants didn't really enjoy it. Dawn tried to get Noah to untangle his emotions and failed. Noah tried to get Dawn to join his alliance and failed. Frederic made a return, and tried to turn me into a vampire, but I used my awesome karate skills to fight him off. Yeah. That's exactly what happened. And somehow I also got caught under a tree. Annette freed me, but only under the condition that I help her with all the challenges. Geez, that's gonna be annoying. Izzy taught Zeke to be aggressive, relatively speaking, which didn't exactly make a good impression on Dawn. Oh yeah, and Noah had Blake jump off a cliff. That was priceless! Soon, all the contestants started disappearing in mysterious ways…..Don't look at me! It really wasn't me this time! Anyway, they were revealed to have been kidnapped by a colony of squirrels that wanted to ship them to the moon since they have thumbs. Yeah, I know it's getting random here, stay with me. Izzy then had to make a choice between winning the challenge and saving her friends. Eventually she chose the latter and blew up all the squirrels, knocking Frederic off the cliff and turning him back into a teen at the same time. And the aforementioned Frederic, well, he'd just accidentally dropped Staci right over the finish line after his sinister vampire plan failed. So Staci actually won a challenge. Really, that's the most impossible thing that's happened so far. In my ever clever never beaver twists, it was all revealed to be a reward challenge! The Psychos then got a free party, with actual good food. Dawn then pledge to fix the retardedness of the nature on this island. What's she gonna do about it? What happened to Frederic? And the squirrels? What of Annette's illegal alliance with me? And who's gonna get the boot next? All these questions answered, I hope, on TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!

(Theme song plays. It shows the camera sweeping past the dock, where Chris waves at it. Chef smiles at it, then gulps as it comes nearer to him, and smacks him in the face. After he disappears the camera zooms up the cliff, where it shows a squirrel punching Zeke in the face. As the camera "falls" off the cliff so does Zeke. Hitting the water, bubbles cover the screen. When they clear, Izzy is swimming away from a shark, only to turn around and bite the shark back. Above the water, Noah is sitting in a boat, reading his trademark book, when Zeke lands on him. Right after the moment of impact, the camera zooms to the forest, where Mike is petting a raccoon. The raccoon bites his finger, causing him to wince in pain, inhale deeply, then scream at the raccoon. The camera zooms to the waterfall, where Annette is singing on top of a log that goes over the waterfall. At the bottom, Dawn is sitting cross-legged on a beam of wood going across a small lake, looking very peaceful. Suddenly, Annette flies past her and her mouth falls open. The camera moves to the outhouse confessional, where a bear is knocking on the door. Blake sticks his head out, screams, and then ducks back in. Chef's kitchen is then seen, with a small television in the background upon which Courtney and Cody can be seen. Lightning is dumping protein powder into his mouth, and then fist-pumps, while Heather is tied to a chair, being force-fed Chef Hatchet's special soup by Chef himself. The camera moves outside to the campfire pit, where Owen is holding and rocking back and forth giggling. Staci is seen on the dock, blabbing on while reading from a gigantic stack of papers. The camera shifts a little, showing Chris on the other side of the dock, covering his ears and yelling. He runs around and falls into the water. When he surfaces, in classic cartoon style, his head steams over in anger, causing a fire. The camera follows the fire embers up, and then back down, revealing the campfire. Zoey is sitting in front of it, looking nervous, before her eyebrows scrunch up and she gives an evil grin, only to look around when she sees Zeke and Mike sitting on either side of her. The camera pans out to show all 13 contestants sitting on stools around the campfire, as Chris stands nearby and grins at the camera. A wooden sign is seen, where neon letters light up, saying TOTAL DRAMA THE ISLAND REBORN)

(Scene shows the girls' side of the Psycho's cabin. Dawn is the only occupant, sleeping peacefully. With a jolt, she sits up, startled)

Dawn: There's something very wrong. An evil presence has landed on the island!

(She jumps up and starts walking towards the door)

Dawn: I promised to help rid the island of all this evil chaos, and now is the perfect time to start. From whatever this creature's aura is, I can tell it must be by the beach, actually very near the Dock of Shame. For whatever reason the aura is extremely muddled, but I sense an underlying feeling of evil.

(She shudders and heads off to the beach. Upon reaching it, she sees a triangular metal body with four little wheels underneath. On the front of it are two lights, red and green. Out of a hole in the top sticks out a human head, covered in freckles and a mop of red hair)

Dawn: [shocked] Scott!

(The head seems lifeless for a second, then jerks up and turns to look at her, flashing a grin of yellow teeth)

Scott: Hi Dawn. Long time, no see.

Dawn: [still startled] What are you doing here? How can you talk? How did you get here? What do you want? And what is with your aura?

Scott: Geez, that's a lot of questions. Whelp, all I can do is answer them, huh? So, in order, I'm here to help you guys, my former fellow campermates, out. As for my voice, I got a mechanic to give me some robot vocal chords, so now I can talk, and also sing as good as a professional choir!

(He starts singing in a terrible screeching voice)

Scott: Oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam, and the deer and the antelope play! See? Anyways, I floated here from Canada. You woulda never thunk it, but this metal suit is pretty darn buoyant. As for what I want, again, just ta help you guys out! What else could I ever want?

Dawn: Probably to cheat, lie and backstab for a million dollars. That's what you want, isn't it?

Scott: No, never! Never ever never ever! Never say never! Never! As for my aura, no clue. You tell me, you're everybody's favorite aura whisperer, am I right? Or am I right?

Dawn: Neither. And how do you plan on 'helping' us?

Scott: Don't tell anybody else, but I know of a little secret. Back before that accursed land shark chewed off all my limbs, I found a little hidden stone wall on Boney Island. Pressing against it, I found a secret passage leading inwards. At the end of an old hallway was treasure! Piles and piles of treasure! Gold coins, jewelry, priceless silverware, gems as large as refrigerators, and much more! Of course, I didn't bring any back, being as unselfish as I am.

(Dawn frowns)

Static

Dawn: Does Scott really think I'm dumb enough to believe him? The evil intent in his aura is clear, even if it is a bit muddled. I don't actually think he's here for the money, but one thing is clear. There is no treasure on Boney Island.

Static

Scott: Hah, the confessional! It's good to be back. Well, not really. Things are going exactly as planned. Dawn's sure to believe me! I can see it in her eyes! But why do I care? See, you're going to be really really surprised by this, but, guess what? [whispering] There is no treasure on Boney Island. Yep, I know how shocked you must be. See, last year I had to suffer more pain and humiliation than any TD contestant had ever before and most likely ever will. And then most of my fellow contestants had the nerve to laugh at me! To laugh at me. That day, then and there, I decided I needed revenge. On the laughers! Those laughing laughers! From leaked clips and predictions about the new season, I'm pretty sure Lightning, Dawn, and Staci are the only TDROTI guys left here. Lightning was busy with the challenge and Staci was just blabbing on, on that fateful day almost exactly one year ago. But Dawn! Dawn laughed! And she will pay. So, my plan is pretty much to get her to go to Boney Island somehow, and hopefully she'll get eaten by some wooly beavers or something. It's perfect!

Static

(Back to the beach)

Dawn: So, what do you expect me to do about this treasure on Boney Island? Go over there and find it?

Scott: Uh, yeah, that's pretty much what I was hoping for.

Dawn: Just how stupid do you think I am?

Scott: Hopefully pretty stupid. Anyway, are you gonna go?

Dawn: No.

Scott: Erm, uh, well, I brought back some treasure! I can show it to you. Then you'll have to believe me.

Dawn: Scott, you would've brought all the treasure back if you ever did find it.

Scott: Well, you see, ya know, it didn't all fit in my pockets! Yeah, way too much for poor me to carry. C'mon, just humor me and take a look.

Dawn: Ugh. Fine.

(She follows Scott off the beach and into the boathouse)

Dawn: You hid it in here? Of all places?

Scott: Well, I always have liked boats.

(He rolls around, trying to shove junk out of the way, eventually revealing the Hurl of Shame from last season)

Scott: I hid it in the bucket of the catapult. With any luck, it'll still be there!

(Dawn leans over and sees nothing)

Dawn: Hey! It's completely empt- - -

(Before she can react, Scott slams into her, knocking her over into the catapult. He then crashes into the lever with his metal body, flinging the catapult up. Dawn is sent flying, crashing through the roof and landing somewhere far away)

Scott: Looks like she landed on Boney Island. Yes! Bullseye! Perfect! Man, that is a great way to settle scores. Whelp, I better start floating back to the mainland.

(He rolls off, whistling)

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(Noah is sleeping peacefully in his bunk, when a loudspeaker is suddenly put right next to his ear. Chris is holding it, chuckling silently)

Chris: [loudspeaker] WAKE UP!

(Noah jerks up and falls out of bed)

Chris: Yeah! Chef owes me ten bucks!

Noah: Ow. Chris McClean, I would strangle you right now, if only I had the upper body strength to do so.

Chris: I'm not even affected by your threats anymore! If you help me wake up the others, I just might push you off the cliff!

Noah: Is that some sort of reward in your sick mind?

Chris: No, I was just hoping you'd be stupid enough to fall for it. And speaking of stupid….

(He looks at the bunk across the room, where Ezekiel is curled up and sucking his thumb)

Chris: [loudspeaker] CHOCOLATE MILK!

(Ezekiel jumps straight up, hits the ceiling, falls over, lands with a bump, and starts thrashing around as a sheet falls on top of him)

Ezekiel: Where?! Where?! Where?!

Chris: Just a joke, Freakzekiel, now move your butt outside! We've got evil announcements to make!

Ezekiel: We doo?

Chris: Yes we do!

Ezekiel: We doo?

(Chris kicks him out the window)

Ezekiel: Yahoohoihooeeeeeeeeeeey, eh!

(He crashes into the megaphone pole and falls down)

Blake: I think that was just the Goofy Holler. With an 'eh' added onto the end.

Chris: No time for observations, everybody wake up!

(As Blake and Noah head outside, Izzy bursts from her little cabin, and Annette, Staci, and Lightning walk out of their rooms, bleary-eyed)

Ezekiel: Where's Dawn, eh?

Chris: Oh yeah, about that. Dawn got tricked and is currently somewhere on Boney Island, in all likelihood getting eaten by vicious creatures. So, therefore, I've officially decided that she's no longer in the game and we can just get on with the challenge.

Annette: That's not right.

Staci: Yah, we need to help her!

Ezekiel: Eh, what she said! With a moose too!

Chris: No, you can't help her, 'cause we're going to be participating in a fun little thing I like to call a….challenge!

Noah: [to Chris] May you break your leg.

Chris: Thanks!

Blake: You know, sometimes in stage performances the phrase 'break a leg' is used in a positive manner, meaning that the actor or actress- - -

(Noah stuffs a sock in Blake's mouth)

Blake: Mmm ommm mmm mmmh, mm hmmm!

Noah: Put a sock in it, literally.

Lightning: Hey, sha-host dude! You can't just leave a little girl alone on Boney Island!

Chris: Actually, I can. It's all in the contract.

(He pulls out a wad of papers from his pocket)

Chris: Read it and weep!

Lightning: Uh, Lightning don't read.

Ezekiel: Neither does the Zeke, yo. Reading's bad for the stupiditus.

Annette: Stupiditus?

Ezekiel: Yoo doon't know aboot the stupiditus? A'yup, well, it's the organ in yoor nose that lets you be stooped. Withoot it, we'd all end up being loike Noah, eh.

Noah: Thanks.

Ezekiel: That's a bad thing.

Noah: Never mind.

Ezekiel: Foorgettin' aboot the stupiditus yo, we gotta rescue Dawn. We gotta!

Chris: Fine then. But whoever goes to rescue Dawn is out of the competition. Permanently. No coming back. So if you still want to help her, take a step forward.

(Most of the contestants actually take a step backward, leaving Zeke the only one still standing right in front of Chris)

Chris: Well, goodbye Zekey, eh! Guess you won't be getting a million dollars.

Lightning: Sha-wait, Lightning's gonna come too! He already won, and Lightning never leaves people to die.

Annette: Yeah, he's right! We're going to rescue Dawn! A deer is sometimes called a fawn!

(The two of them step forward to stand beside Zeke)

Chris: Okey-dokey, guess you three are out. Wow, we're down to the final four already! Maybe this season won't have twenty-six episodes after all.

Izzy: It's gonna have even less soon, 'cause I learned my lesson last episode. This competition is worthless compared to the value of friends!

(She takes a step forward)

Noah: Izzy? You actually have normal human emotions?

Izzy: Not really, but I wanted to try and turn Dawn into a raccoon, and I can't do that with her on Boney Island, right?

(Chris starts to worry and looks desperately at the last three who have not volunteered to recue Dawn, that is, Blake, Noah, and Staci)

Chris: You guys'll stay, right?

Staci: Wrong. My great-great-aunt's cousin's father's nephew seven times removed invented saving people, and I fully intend to live up to his name.

Ezekiel: Woohoo! Go Staci's crazy ancestor's eh!

Blake: I have to agree with them. It's really not right to just leave Dawn there, even if she and I have never exactly gotten along very well together.

(He takes a step forward, joining the rest. Noah is the last one left behind, and his face remains as emotionless as ever. After a long pause, he starts to take a step forward)

Chris: Noah! Wait! Please! If you'll stay for just this final challenge, I'll straight out give you the million bucks!

(This makes the genius pause. He steps back, a worried look on his face. A long awkward moment passes, and then he sighs)

Noah: You know what Chris? Izzy's right. A million bucks isn't worth someone else's safety. I can't believe I'm actually doing this, but forget it. Take your million. Go buy yourself a Ferrari. We're going to rescue Dawn.

(The other contestants cheer, and Noah allows himself a small smile. Izzy then grabs him in a bear hug, threatening to squeeze him to death)

Izzy: Izzy was right! Yay Noah! We're going to save Dawn and turn her into a raccoon!

Noah: [choking] You're….welcome….let….go….

Izzy: Sure thing!

(She throws Noah into the air and he crashes into the top of the Psychos' cabin, somersaulting down over the shingles and landing hard on the porch steps)

Izzy: See? I let go! Now Chris, where's your helicopter?

Chris: Currently? Exploded. And even if it wasn't, I wouldn't let you use it. Haha!

(He sticks his tongue out at them, and then starts wiggling his fingers in front of his nose rudely)

Chris: Ha ha! Hah! I'm mocking you! Ha ha! Hahahah!

(Lightning throws a stone and knocks the host out. Chris falls over, stars going around his head)

Lightning: Sha-bam!

Annette: Hey, aren't there motorboats in the boathouse?

Ezekiel: A'yup. Four, eh. We can split up and search for clues!

Noah: You mean search for Dawn, Fred.

Ezekiel: That's wot Oi said. Who's Fred? Hey! That rhymed, eh!

(Everyone groans)

Izzy: Anyway, Zeke did have a pretty good idea. Let's go!

(The seven dash off in the direction of the boathouse)

Static

Izzy: Yes! When a fellow camper needs help, you can count on Izzy to help them out!

Static

Noah: Do I regret giving up a million dollars? Yes. But I didn't really give it up. Chris is desperate for fame. As soon as we get Dawn back, he'll find a way to rope us back in. And then I'll be on track for the million, once again.

Static

Ezekiel: Wow, eh, I'm so glad everyone's helpin' out to find Dawn! It'd be terrible for me if she woos eaten alive by soomethin' evil! Er, probably it'd be terrible for her too. Maybe. Chockate milk, eh.

Static

(Scene shows a dark, gloomy, and extremely foggy forest, in which Dawn has landed. She slowly stands up and shivers from the cold)

Dawn: Hello? Is anyone here?

(The only response she gets is her own echo)

Dawn: I guess not. This must be Boney Island, then.

(The fog clears a bit and she sees a little cove with a skull-shaped rock at the end)

Dawn: Oh, that's unpleasant.

(She hears a snuffling noise behind her, and slowly backs away. A huge wooly behemoth rises from the trees and gives a throaty roar. She runs away as it gives chase)

Dawn: Scott! Curse you!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(Scene shows the boathouse, where Chef is going around dumping slop into eight different bowls. Suddenly, the contestants break through the door and crash into him)

Chef: What're y'all doing? Get back over here and eat the dang breakfast I worked so hard on cookin' for you.

Noah: Your definition of working hard is apparently a little different from ours.

Ezekiel: Yeah, eh! Workin' hard, or hardly workin'?

Chef: Why, you little, uh, little something! I'll get you yet! Accusin' me o' hardly workin'! The nerve!

(He tries to strangle Zeke, but Lightning's too quick for him. Before the old cook has any idea what's going on, the jock has shoved him over into the water)

Chef: You dummies! You'll pay for this!

(Nobody pays him any attention as they head towards the five motorboats tied up at the dock)

Lightning: Sha-bam! It's rescuin' time!

(He jumps into a motorboat and drives off. The other six look at each other, and at the three remaining boats)

Noah: Well, we better split up into groups of two.

Izzy: Ooh ooh, I call Singy Girl! She's funny!

(Before Annette can protest, she's dragged into a boat by Izzy. The latter turns the keys in the ignition and they roar off at two hundred miles per hour, leaving a trail of flame in their wake)

Staci: That was fast.

Ezekiel: Noo time to waste, eh! Let's get gooin'!

(He hops in a boat)

Ezekiel: Whoo's goin' with me?

Staci: Yah, I will.

Ezekiel: Yay! Then Oi can listen to yoor awesome ancestor stories!

(Zeke continues to cheer as Staci boards the motorboat, and the two speed off into the fog)

Blake: Well, Noah, guess we better share a boat.

Noah: [sarcastically] Geez, what good luck I've been having today.

(Scene switches to Lightning, who is gunning his small boat as fast as it will go)

Lightning: Sha-bam! It might not be no competition any longer, but Lightning's always first! Nobody's gonna end up rescuin' Creepy Girl before he does! Sha-bammity boom bam bang!

(Camera shows Zeke driving one of the boats, with Staci sitting behind him)

Ezekiel: Eh, I'm pretty wooried aboot Dawn, eh.

Staci: Yah, I think we all are.

Ezekiel: A'yup, but I think Oi am most.

Staci: Why?

Ezekiel: Er, no reason, eh. Prob'ly cause I like squirrels.

Staci: I thought you hated squirrels.

Ezekiel: Oh yeah that's right. Care to tell me one o' yoor true stories, eh?

Staci: Yah, sure. So, my great-great-great-uncle twice removed Reallysmellyfeet lived in a town where there were no vacuum cleaners. That wasn't very hard to do, as vacuum cleaners weren't invented that. But great-great-great-uncle twice removed Reallysmellyfeet noticed that vacuum cleaners were missing. So he invented them. And then everyone was so grateful, they made him the king of Greenland. But there still wasn't enough- - -

(The camera pans off as Staci continues to chatter while Zeke listens attentively)

(Scene switch. Blake and Noah are shown, with Blake driving)

Blake: I'm not really sure how to steer this thing.

Noah: It's easy. Just push the thingamajigger, press the whatsitcalled, and pull on the thingamabob until you get the desired result.

Blake: What about this big red button?

Noah: Don't push it.

Blake: Phew, I knew red was a warning color. I am not allowed to push big red buttons.

Noah: Are you making all this weird stuff up?

Blake: What stuff?

Noah: About not being allowed to do stuff.

Blake: No, my family's just really strict.

Noah: Really? Then how do they take the fact that you're often a sugar-crazed maniac.

Blake: Not so well. But Scottish Blake will be Scottish Blake, that's all I can say.

Noah: Yeah. Being a lunatic has to suck.

Blake: Well, Izzy's a lunatic. And she always seems pretty happy.

Noah: Ah, Izzy is a pretty awesome girl, despite being a lunatic.

Blake: Despite of or because of?

Noah: Probably both. Now don't get on my nerves or I'll shove you out of the boat.

Blake: But then who would drive?

Noah: I hate it when you make a point.

(Noah sits back and grumbles to himself. Suddenly, his eyes seem to pop out of their sockets)

Noah: BLAKE! PAY ATTENTION! WATCH OUT!

Blake: Huh?

(He turns around just in time to see a huge rock appear directly in the boat's path. They crash into it headfirst. As the boat explodes, Noah and Blake are flung into the air, screaming. Eventually they land on a grainy beach, Noah getting his head stuck in the sand)

Blake: Ow. I didn't know it was possible to be in so much pain that your pain has pain. And that pain of pain has amnesia.

(He sits up)

Blake: Where are we?

Noah: [pulling his head out of the sand] Looks to me like Boney Island.

Blake: How can you tell?

Noah: I can't, not really. I've never been here before, thanks to getting the boot early and then missing the cut for season four. But based on the giant rock that's shaped like a skull, I would guess that we're on Boney Island.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(Camera goes to Annette and Izzy's boat. Izzy is still driving the boat like a maniac while Annette clutches on for dear life)

Izzy: Whee! This….is….awesome! C'mon Blondie! Start singin' in joy!

Annette: I think I'll sing in terror! I have sent up a prayer! That I survive this ride! I have a cramp in my side! I hope I have not died!

Static

Annette: Izzy isn't the best shipmate….

Static

Izzy: This….is….awesome! I'm sitting in an outhouse! Whee!

Static

Scott: Yep, I saw everyone rush to rescue Dawn. Unlike how they did NOT rush to rescue me from Fang last season. But I'm not too concerned. Dawn's sure to be eaten by now. Yes! My plans always work!

Static

Ezekiel: I feel loike this place was just used fer dramatic irony, eh.

Static

(Scene shows Lightning, who has landed on Boney Island)

Lightning: Hmm, I don't see Creepy Girl anywhere around here.

(He walks over to some bushes and pulls out a gigantic wooly beaver)

Lightning: Hey, Lightning found you Creepy Girl! You're comin' back with me now.

(He tries to drag the wooly beaver along behind him, but it swats him off, and then roars)

Lightning: Uh, what're you doin'?

(The beaver doesn't pause to answer, instead it just chases after Lightning)

Lightning: Lightnin' don't like this game! Help!

(Screen change. Shown is Annette and Izzy, who have landed and are walking through the creepy woods when they spy Dawn)

Izzy: Dawn!

Annette: Dawn! Over here!

Izzy: Hey!

(Dawn ignores them and runs right by)

Annette: What'd she do that for?

(They find out the answer soon enough as a huge grizzly with spikes on its back and horns sticking out of its mouth comes charging at them. Izzy dashes out of the way, but Annette isn't quick enough, She's head butted by the monster grizzly and goes flying)

Annette: [as she falls somewhere in the distance] This really isn't funny! 'Cause of this fog it's not sunny!

Izzy: Whoa.

(Scene switches to Noah and Blake, who are combing the beach for any sign of Dawn. Blake takes a moment to rest, sitting down on a rock)

Blake: Hey Noah, got anything to eat?

Noah: [groaning] There's a lunch box in my backpack. [gritting his teeth] Help yourself.

(Blake walks over to the backpack and rummages through it, eventually pulling out a Dora the Explorer lunch box)

Blake: Dora the E- - -

Noah: [threateningly] Don't ask.

Blake: Okay.

(He opens up the box, and, without thinking, chomps down a cupcake)

Blake: Uh, Noah, did that cupcake have sugared frosting?

Noah: Yeah. Why? Oh. Oh crap.

(Blake's eyelid twitches, then he jumps up)

Blake: HEY READY FOR SOME ADVENTURIN' IN THE HILLS O' SCOOTLAND?!

Noah: No thanks.

Blake: TOO BAD 'CAUSE IT'S ADVENTURIN' TIME!

(He grabs Noah and picks him up)

Noah: How are you so strong all of a sudden?! Hey! Put me down!

Blake: AN ADVENTURE'S AN ADVENTURE AS MY DEAR OLD GRANDPAPPY USED TO SAY ON HIS SCOOTISH BAGPIPE!

Noah: That doesn't even make sense!

(Before he can protest, Noah is flung into the water)

Blake: YOU'RE WELCOME FER THE SCOOTISH ADVENTURE!

(Scottish Blake disappears into the forest as Noah crawls out on shore)

Noah: [sarcastically] Great.

(Camera switches to Zeke and Staci. They've just reached shore and are jumping out of the boat)

Ezekiel: Land ahoy, eh! Off we go!

Staci: Oh, no thanks, I'll just stay here if you don't mind. This place gives me the willies.

Ezekiel: Noo problem, eh. Off I go!

(He walks off into the woods, and hasn't gone far when someone crashes into him, knocking him over)

Ezekiel: Get ooff, woooly beaver! Oi have a container of chockate milk and Oi'm not afraid to use it!

(He brings out a baby bottle from his backpack, but stops when he realizes the person who crashed into him is Dawn)

Dawn: Zeke? Zeke! I'm saved!

(She hugs him tightly)

Dawn: I thought for sure Chris would make you all leave me to die!

Ezekiel: He almost did, eh. A'yup. But we wooldn't let 'em.

Dawn: Thank you thank you thank you than- - -, wait why am I hugging you?

(She backs away awkwardly)

Dawn: Uh, where's the boat?

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(Half an hour later, almost all the campers, including Dawn, have gathered around the boats. Of course there are only three boats left, as Noah and Blake's boat exploded. Speaking of Blake, he is the only teen still missing. The others yell out his name methodically, wanting to get off the island)

Ezekiel: Blake, eh!

Staci: Blake! Where are you?!

Noah: Blake! Stop being an idiot!

Lightning: Sha-Blake!

Blake: I'M RIGHT HERE LADS AND LASSIES!

(Scottish Blake jumps out from behind a tree)

Annette: Where've you been?! We've been waiting forever!

Blake: FORGET THAT! WATCH MY SCOOTISH SOMERSUALTS!

(He starts rolling end over end until he crashes into a stone wall. Next to him, a secret passage opens up. Down the end of a long hallway, treasure of all kind can be seen)

Dawn: Scott was telling the truth!

(Within seconds, all the contestants have dashed inside and are fighting over everything)

Noah: Gimme!

Annette: No! It's mine!

Lightning: Lightning wants it!

Ezekiel: Too bad, eh. Zeke's gonna take it all!

(Amid all the chaos, Chris and Chef drive up in another motorboat)

Chris: Attention campers!

(Everyone ignores him)

Chris: Hey! Over here!

(He's still ignored)

Chris: IT'S ALL FAKE!

(This gets everyone's attention)

Chris: Yep, there's not a piece of real gold in there. Finding that fake loot was supposed to be the challenge, and seeing as how you all did it, I guess you're back in the game.

Noah: That's not why. You're just desperate.

Chris: And so what if I am?

(Noah rolls his eyes)

Ezekiel: It's good to be back, eh.

(Everyone else nods)

Static

Chris: Phew, I was expecting a pretty big legal battle right there.

Static

Dawn: I sure am glad I got rescued. I honestly didn't think I was going to make it. And I guess I do have to be grateful towards Zeke. Just a little.

Static

Scott: You know what? I hate coincidences.

(He mutters darkly for awhile)

Static

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

(Noah and Zeke are outside their cabin. Noah is reading his book while sitting on the steps, and Zeke is fooling around with a tennis ball)

Ezekiel: Hey Noah, guess what!

Noah: What?

Ezekiel: You guessed it! No, but seriously, eh! After I saved Dawn, she hugged me!

Noah: [sarcastically] Whoopee! I sound my French horn in joy!

Ezekiel: That woos the first time Oi've ever been hugged by a girl, eh.

Noah: Hasn't your mom ever hugged you?

Ezekiel: Nope. Prob'ly has something to do with the body lice that covers every inch of me, eh.

(Noah pointedly slides a few feet farther away from Zeke)

Noah: Er, if I were you, I wouldn't tell Dawn about that.

Ezekiel: A'yup.

(He bounces the ball, and it hits him in the eye)

Ezekiel: OOOUWWCH!

(Scene switches to the Dock of Shame, where Chris is standing as the sun goes down)

Chris: Another day gone by. Another day gone by. Sorry, I couldn't think of a humorous second sentence, so I just repeated myself. Anyway, is Dawn actually starting to like Ezekiel? Will Izzy end up killing Annette and Scottish Blake end up killing Noah? And who will be eliminated next? Yeah, we desperately need an elimination here. We're totally overdue! So to find out, you better watch the next episode of TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!

(Credits play)

Eliminated: Mike, Zoey, Mr. Coconut, Owen, Heather

Psycho Psychos: Blake, Dawn, Ezekiel, Noah

Team Izzy: Izzy

Crazy Crazies: Annette, Lightning, Staci

And we've reached double-digit episodes! Please remember to review and vote, and if you like a more serious, action-filled, non-script style story, check out Total Drama Jurassic Park. See you soon!

~TheImpossiblyAwesomeWriter

Next Time: When Chef takes over hosting for a day, the campers will have to suffer through extreme challenges, brutal conditions, and extra times 1,000,000 soup. In the words of Chef himself: "It ain't gonna be pretty."