Episode 13: Sinny Golf
Hey, time for celebration! We've reached the half-way point of TDTIR! Please celebrate the occasion by reviewing, following, favoriting, all of the above, or any other stuff. Although I do have to apologize in advance for the lameness of the challenge part. I didn't really enjoy it, but at least hopefully you will.
(Camera shows Chris standing on the Dock of Shame)
Chris: Last time, on Total Drama The Island Reborn, I was busy in the U.S. getting my recap problems taken care of. Yeah, long story. Anyway, Chef took over the position of host for a day and made our unloveable teenage contestants compete in the five extreme Chef Challenges. First, they had to climb the tallest tree on Wawanakwa, which Dawn won in her own mysterious way. The second challenge was another version of the eat-disgusting-stuff-and-don't-vomit challenges from seasons one, three, and four. As Chef helped Annette out in accordance to her annoying illegal alliance with me, she ate victory that round. Literally. The third Chef Challenge involved wrestling an alligator, er, crocodile, er, crap, who cares?! They're like the same freaking animal! Yeah, Izzy won that, no surprise. Then, in a rehash of the first challenge, Chef had another sword fighting duel take place, which Dawn won. Meaning she's two for two at the sword matches and she's never struck a blow. I mean, seriously, just how lucky is she? Anyway, the next and final Chef Challenge was a dogfight that did not involve any dogs. Yeah, an airplane battle, for those of you out there who are clueless when it comes to aeronautics. In a twist, ten points would be granted to the winner, giving them an automatic overall win. Just when it seemed like victory was in the palms of the Psychos' hands, the evil king squirrel made an appearance and screwed everything up. So Izzy won and got a buffet all to herself. The Psychos, coming in second, had to perform numerous chores for Chef. And the last-placing Crazies went to elimination, where Staci and Lightning planned to eliminate Annette and her unfair advantage with her. However, Lightning stupidly voted for himself, knocking that loser out of the competition. It's down to the final seven, and the drama just won't stop! Will Dawn's luck finally run out? Is Noah's alliance doomed to fall apart? And is Annette in line for the next boot after angering her teammates with her illegal alliance? Haha. Find out all this stuff here on TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!
(Theme song plays. It shows the camera sweeping past the dock, where Chris waves at it. Chef smiles at it, then gulps as it comes nearer to him, and smacks him in the face. After he disappears the camera zooms up the cliff, where it shows a squirrel punching Zeke in the face. As the camera "falls" off the cliff so does Zeke. Hitting the water, bubbles cover the screen. When they clear, Izzy is swimming away from a shark, only to turn around and bite the shark back. Above the water, Noah is sitting in a boat, reading his trademark book, when Zeke lands on him. Right after the moment of impact, the camera zooms to the forest, where Mike is petting a raccoon. The raccoon bites his finger, causing him to wince in pain, inhale deeply, then scream at the raccoon. The camera zooms to the waterfall, where Annette is singing on top of a log that goes over the waterfall. At the bottom, Dawn is sitting cross-legged on a beam of wood going across a small lake, looking very peaceful. Suddenly, Annette flies past her and her mouth falls open. The camera moves to the outhouse confessional, where a bear is knocking on the door. Blake sticks his head out, screams, and then ducks back in. Chef's kitchen is then seen, with a small television in the background upon which Courtney and Cody can be seen. Lightning is dumping protein powder into his mouth, and then fist-pumps, while Heather is tied to a chair, being force-fed Chef Hatchet's special soup by Chef himself. The camera moves outside to the campfire pit, where Owen is holding and rocking back and forth giggling. Staci is seen on the dock, blabbing on while reading from a gigantic stack of papers. The camera shifts a little, showing Chris on the other side of the dock, covering his ears and yelling. He runs around and falls into the water. When he surfaces, in classic cartoon style, his head steams over in anger, causing a fire. The camera follows the fire embers up, and then back down, revealing the campfire. Zoey is sitting in front of it, looking nervous, before her eyebrows scrunch up and she gives an evil grin, only to look around when she sees Zeke and Mike sitting on either side of her. The camera pans out to show all 13 contestants sitting on stools around the campfire, as Chris stands nearby and grins at the camera. A wooden sign is seen, where neon letters light up, saying TOTAL DRAMA THE ISLAND REBORN)
(In the boys' side of the Psychos' cabin, Ezekiel is dead asleep, snoring. Blake and Noah have already awaken, however, and are stretching and yawning, respectively)
Blake: Good morning!
Noah: What's so good about it?
Blake: Uh, lots of things, I guess.
Noah: [rolling his eyes] Like what?
Blake: Well, the sun is shining….
Noah: Great. UV rays. Now I can get skin cancer.
Blake: ….the birds are singing….
Noah: Which is definitely not music to my ears.
Blake: ….the breeze is nice and cool….
Noah: Cool enough to give me frostbite.
Blake ….and, why are you always so, what's the word? Ah, pessimistic.
Noah: Who says I'm pessimistic? Maybe I was being sarcastic.
Blake: But sometimes you say optimistic things in a mocking voice, like you're being sarcastic, so it's really pessimistic, I think.
Noah: Blake, you need to learn how to read people. Like I read my book. Now, see the Ezekiel over there? Tell me, what is he thinking?
Blake: He's asleep.
Noah: Fine then. What is he dreaming?
Blake: Uh, getting chased by squirrels?
(Noah face palms)
Noah: No! He's grinning stupidly, which probably means he's dreaming about Dawn.
Blake: I thought he didn't like Dawn.
Noah: Really? That's so pathetic; I can't even find a word for how pathetic it is with my 300,000 word vocabulary.
Blake: What about 'asparagus'?
Noah: What does asparagus have to do with this?
Blake: I dunno, but it's a pretty big word.
(Scene switches to the girls' side of the Psychos' cabin, of which Dawn is the only inhabitant. She's sitting on the windowsill with her legs crossed, meditating)
Dawn: I sense betrayal in the near future. Very soon. But also, redemption and mending. Coming from the same person. I can't quite make out who it is, though. And someone will suffer because of all this. And that someone is….
(She is genuinely startled by the answer she finds)
Dawn: I don't believe it! The next one to get eliminated is going to be- - -
(She's interrupted as the sound of an air horn breaks the early morning silence)
Dawn: Chris again. If only he could be the sufferer, as he certainly deserves it the most. Sigh. Some wishes will just never come true.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(The seven remaining campers have crowded around Chris, who is standing by the megaphone pole)
Chris: Well campers, I've certainly made a great discovery. Instead of losing my voice by shouting through the loudspeaker, I can just wake you all up with this nifty little air horn!
(He sticks a finger in his ear and covers the other with his arm, and then blows the air horn again, blasting out everyone's eardrums)
Chris: Now, careful analysis has shown that sports challenges always get good ratings. So today, we're going to be doing the most extreme sport of all time.
Noah: [shuddering] Dodgeball?
Chris: No.
Blake: Rugby?
Chris: No.
Staci: Skydiving?
Chris: No.
Dawn: Kayaking off a waterfall?
Chris: No.
Annette: Moonwalking?
Chris: The dance move?
Annette: No, literally walking on the moon.
Chris: No.
Izzy: Mixed Martial Arts Motorboating while Sleeping?
Chris: No.
Ezekiel: Pineapple, eh?
Chris: No! Mini golf!
(Everyone is pleasantly surprised)
Blake: Mini golf! I'm allowed to play mini golf!
Noah: Despite my better judgment, I might actually enjoy this challenge.
Staci: Yah, my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-gr eat-great-great-great-grandmother invented mini golf. Before her, people could only play miniature golf.
Dawn: Sadly, I sense all is not as it seems.
Chris: Dawn's right, as this'll be the most painful game of miniature golf ever played! This is how it's gonna work. Chef has set up nine holes, the same number that a regular mini golf course has. The first three are just warm-ups. After that, the person with the most strokes on the hole is kicked out of the game. At the final hole, whoever wins snatches victory for their teams.
Izzy: What if two people tie for last at one hole?
Chris: Then, they participate in a special sudden death round where they both hit the ball as fast as they can, and whoever gets it in the hole first wins. All clear?
Noah: Clear as mud mixed with muck stuck in a pile of opaque objects.
Chris: Thank you, Noah, for your boring Churchill Wit! Now, let's get on over to Hole One.
Static
Ezekiel: I love mini golf, eh! Especially the part where you get to hit yourself in the head with the putter. Or is that basketball? Better check the rule books again.
Static
Annette: Yes, a challenge where I scarcely even need my illegal alliance! I'm like a golfing pro.
Static
End of Confessionals
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(The campers are standing in front of a mini golf green. From the starting mat, one has to hit it through five loop de loops in a row, and then up on a platform balancing on the tops of the loop de loops. From there it's a matter of luck to drop it into the hole, which is located all the way back behind the starting mat. Going in alphabetical order, Annette starts. As part of her not-so-secret deal with Chris, she's given a special ball that acts like a homing beacon to the hole. Sadly, she doesn't hit it hard enough to make it through the loop de loops and takes three strokes to finish up. Blake hits it plenty hard, but it falls off the platform and off the course, giving him a penalty stroke and making him start over. He then hits it out again, but sinks it all the way from the starting matt on the third try, giving him a total of five strokes)
Blake: Ha! Third time's the charm!
Chris: Too bad you got two penalty strokes.
(Dawn follows Blake and gets a decent score of four strokes. After that comes Ezekiel, who randomly swings the putter around, sometimes hitting the ball, sometimes hitting other people. After thirty strokes, Chris fails him and grabs the putter, much to his protest. Then comes Izzy, who aces the hole with a perfect hole in one. Noah then gets a respectable three, with Staci doing terribly and getting a seven)
Chris: Moving on to Hole Two! This one's gonna be fun.
(The next hole is shaped extremely strangely. The green goes straight for a while, then slopes upward to be entirely vertical, then curves back over upside-down, with the hole being vertical the opposite way. Of course many of the campers marvel at how they'll get it in, but Annette's homing beacon of a ball does nicely and she gets it in in four strokes. Blake follows with six, Dawn with three, and Ezekiel pretends he's the golf ball and tries to fit into the hole. He then gets stuck, and it takes the combined efforts of all the other campers and Chris to pull him out. Izzy then finishes up with three, Noah with a hole in one, and Staci with five)
Static
Annette: Okay, so maybe I'm not a professional at mini golf, but I'm still pretty good. Ya hear?
Static
Noah: Geez, this is an easy challenge. And it's not that bad either.
Static
End of Confessionals
Chris: Alright campers, we're moving on to the final hole that's just for fun.
Noah: Fun?
Chris: Yes, fun!
Noah: Fine, I guess it's fun. But only just a little.
(The next hole, however, isn't so fun, as the straight and simple green is covered with mines. Annette's special ball thankfully goes straight through them and she gets a hole in one. Blake isn't so lucky, as his ball explodes and he fails the hole. Dawn carefully putts around the mines and scores a four. Ezekiel, instead of hitting the ball, throws himself bodily at the mines and sets them all off, failing in the process and getting fourth-degree burns. Chris has to pause the game and get a whole new set of mines to replace the ones Zeke exploded. Izzy and Staci both get threes without hitting any mines, but Noah's ball collides with one and goes up in smoke. The campers then move on the fourth hole, which has over a hundred pipes to hit the ball into, and hopefully a few of them will lead into the hole. Annette's ball automatically finds the right pipe and zooms into the hole for another hole in one. Blake hits it into a different pipe, and it shoots back out, smacking him in the forehead, and then bouncing back and landing in the hole, giving him an accidental hole in one. Dawn's pipe leads her golf ball a few inches away from the hole, and she easily knocks it in for a two. Ezekiel takes his putter and starts trying to destroy the pipes, and Chris has to grab the blunt object from him and club him over the head with it to get him to stop. Izzy's shot pops it into a water hazard, but she dives in and hits it out, eventually scoring a five. Noah goes with a different strategy and pops his ball over the pipes, landing near the hole and allowing him to get in a three. Staci's pipe drops her ball on the complete opposite end of the green, and she has to hit it hard just to get it in the hole in six more strokes, so a seven)
Chris: Now, Ezekiel has obviously lost, so I'm just gonna drag his unconscious body outta here.
(He grabs Zeke and tosses him away into the woods, where the Canadian bounces and rolls until he falls off a cliff.
Ezekiel: [from somewhere far away] YOWCHHHH!
Chris: Yeah, this is getting sort of boring, so we're just going to montage the next couple holes. Since it's probably one of those eight minute long montages, we can play 'Stairway to Heaven' while it's running though!
Blake: I'm not allowed to listen to classic rock.
Chris: I don't give a crap. Montage, begin!
('Stairway to Heaven' does actually start playing as the campers approach the fifth hole. It looks a lot like a green ski jump, as the starting matt is far overhead, and then the green dives down, curves back up a little and stops, with the hole being a good deal farther away on an entirely separate green. Annette gets a four, Blake an eight, and Dawn isn't able to hit it hard enough for a while, eventually getting an eleven after many fails and added penalty strokes. Izzy gets a two, Noah a hole in one, and Staci a nine. Dawn is eliminated from the mini golf challenge as the five remaining campers make their way to the sixth hole, which is entirely underwater. It slopes down, passing through a seaweed jungle, a school of fish, and a hungry shark that'd prefer to eat the ball. Instead of a hole, a giant clam shell sits near the end, opening and closing slowly. The campers hold their breath and dive in. Annette's special golf ball zones in on the clam shell, but can't manage to time it right for a while, eventually earning her a six. Blake gets a five, Izzy gets a four, and Noah gets a five too. It comes down to Staci, whose ball is eaten by the shark, failing her automatically. After that, the seventh hole is extremely hard. A bunch of corn, wheat, and other crops have been purposely grown all over the end of the green, making it impossible to see the hole. Getting it in relies solely on luck. Going this time in reverse alphabetical order, Noah gets a twenty-four, Izzy is apparently very lucky and gets a three, and Blake gets a seventeen. As Annette steps up to the starting matt, the montage ends)
Annette: Yeah, this one's mine!
Static
Annette: Alright, confession time. And what better place for that than the confessional? So, you've probably figured I'm no good at mini gold normally. And it's true. But with a golf ball that will automatically go into the hole that no one else can find, I'm sure to win!
Static
(Annette pretends to take aim and swings. The ball immediately starts zooming towards the hole, but then gets confused. Inexplicably, Chris and Chef have somehow grown doughnut plants, and the hole in the doughnuts confuses the golf homing beacon, especially the delicious chocolate glazed ones. No matter how many times Annette hits it; it never manages to find the hole. Once she swings more times than Noah's twenty-four, Chris automatically fails her)
Annette: No! I was so young! I have lost this game! Things are no longer tame!
Chris: Yeah yeah. Time for the semi-final hole.
(The eight and next-to-last hole has a green made out of super glue, which catches the putter and the shoes of the campers, not to mention barely lets the golf balls move at all. Blake struggles through the course and ends up with a twelve. Izzy smacks the ball as hard as she possibly can, and it zooms straight through the super glue and into the hole, earning her the first hole in one anyone's had for a while. Noah realizes the strategy is to pop the ball up so it doesn't get stuck. He does so, but luck is against him and he also gets a twelve)
Chris: Ooh, Blake and Noah tied for last! Both of you, get back to the starting mat and race to hit it in. Go!
(The two both rush back to the start and begin swinging. Blake quickly gets ahead and aims a shot at the hole. Noah realizes it's going to go in and smacks his golf ball right at Blake's, knocking it off course. He then runs up to his one and taps it in)
Noah: Yes!
Chris: Alright people, it's on to the final hole, with Noah competing for the Psycho Psychos, and Izzy for the Crazy Crazies. Check out this last hole, it's epic!
(The hole starts by going up a long hill, past a bunch of small divets in the ground that fire randomly shoots out of. The course then somehow defies gravity and turns upside-down, where a huge gap in front of and behind the hole make the last bit rather tricky)
Izzy: Yay Noah, we get to play mini golf together!
(She grabs him in a headlock and starts giving him a noogie. Eventually he breaks free from the hold)
Noah: Alright, let's just get this over with.
Chris: Ha, no chance of that! Time for a twist, as always. The final hole must be completed….blindfolded.
Noah: Blindfolded? That's like a complete rehash of the hole with crops growing on it!
Chris: Shush! Our less intelligent viewers won't pick up on that. Now, blindfolds on and mouths closed!
(Noah and Izzy allow an intern to come up and blindfold them, and Izzy grabs her putter and heads to the hole)
Static
Izzy: [blindfolded] I've got this challenge in the bag! I'm a mini golf crazy lady! Hey, who turned out the lights?
Static
End of Confessionals
(Izzy lines herself up as best as she can without being able to see, and swings hard at the golf ball, knocking it safely past the flames. Her next shot gets it so flip gravity and land on the upside-down green. She then smacks it into one of the gaps, earning a penalty stroke, but her next shot is perfect, and zooms right in the hole)
Chris: Alright, a five! Noah's got to beat that for the win. Ready?
Noah: As ready as I'll ever be. Which is not much, really.
(He steps up to the ball and smacks it. It rolls and stops right next to one of the flame divets, which goes off, charring one side of it. However, it's okay as Noah comes up, finds the golf ball, and takes aim. Using the speed of the wind, the feel of the grass, the sounds he hears, and his advanced knowledge of physics and trajectories, he lines the ball up for a perfect shot and realizes it's sure to go in. Allowing himself a sly grin, he brings the putter back, swings it forward, and makes contact with the ball. Just as he hits it, he sense something wrong)
Ezekiel: I'm Ezekiel, eh! I like chockate milk!
(Zeke, who has somehow reappeared, randomly jumps in front of him, and the ball smacks him in the head, bouncing off him and straight through one of the jets of flames, which disintegrates it. Zeke is knocked out cold and falls over, landing on Noah and rolling them both onto one of the fire divets)
Noah: Zeke! You complete- - -
(He doesn't get to finish his insult, as the flame turns on and catches them on fire, blasting them high into the sky. After a long while, they fall back down, covered in still-burning flames. Noah, who's somehow still conscious, rolls over and face palms before passing out)
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(Noah is sitting on a lawn chair near the cabin, that same evening. He's wearing a cast on his leg and a neck brace, and the rest of him is covered in bandages and gauze. After the Ezekiel incident, in which his golf ball was destroyed, Chris automatically failed him, giving the Crazy Crazies a win. Blake walks up to him)
Blake: Hey Noah. Sorry about what happened back at the mini golf game. Get well soon and all that.
Noah: Get out.
Blake: Okay, but I just want to say before I go, thanks for being such a great friend! You can count on me not to vote for you. See ya later!
(As Blake walks off, Noah looks a little suspicious. He'd expect foul play from anyone else, but then realizes Blake is being genuine. Guilt starts to consume him)
Noah: NO! Don't listen to yourself, Noah. You have to vote for Blake! All you gotta do is vote for him and he's gone! All your troubles are over! Vote for Blake! Got to vote for Blake! MUST VOTE FOR BLAKE! Vote. Goes. To….ARGH! I can't do it. I just can't vote for Blake. Why can't I? Stupid Noah! Stupid stupid Noah!
(He starts smacking his head on a stump, and then kicks it with his broken leg, but then yelps and falls over)
Noah: Okay, that actually was stupid. But it's true. If I can't vote for Blake, and Zeke's my alliance member, besides myself, that leaves only….Dawn? Huh. I actually kinda liked Dawn, and she's not exactly bad at challenges either. I really should just vote for Blake and be done with it. No! I can't! Ugh, since when do I experience emotions like sympathy, or compassion, or, GUILT?! I'm starting to hate this game. But I still intend to win it, even if that means getting rid of Dawn. I just don't know how I'm going to break the news to Zeke.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(Noah trudges towards Ezekiel for their daily alliance meeting in the woods, being careful with his cast. Ezekiel wears no casts, but is covered in bandages everywhere. The Canadian boy doesn't notice that the bookworm's mood is even worse than usual)
Noah: Hey Zeke.
Ezekiel: Hallo, Noah, eh! Who are we votin' for tooday?
Noah: As much as I'd like to vote for you after you nearly killed me from pure utter stupidity, we're not doing that.
Ezekiel: Okay! Blake then, eh!
(Noah sighs)
Noah: No, not Blake. Sorry Zeke, but I just can't do it. I can't vote for Blake. We're going to have to vote for Dawn.
(Zeke stares at him in shocked silence for a long painful moment)
Ezekiel: No, eh. No! NO!
Noah: Listen Zeke, I know you've gotten a bit attached to Dawn and don't want her to leave, but- - -
Ezekiel: I ain't votin' for Dawn, eh! You can't make me!
Noah: [hastily] Zeke, if you don't vote for her, you can consider this alliance officially over.
Ezekiel: Never ever berries! How aboot Dawn and I vote for you then, eh? How aboot it?
Noah: [angrily] Go ahead. See how that works out for ya.
Ezekiel: Well, I will, eh! This alliance thingamabober is over! Zekeiel out!
(He crosses his arms and stomps off)
Noah: Well, that could've gone better.
(Scene switches to Dawn, who is chatting with a bluebird in her side of the Psychos' cabin when there is a knock at the door)
Dawn: Come in.
(Ezekiel walks in, looking glum)
Ezekiel: Dawn, I need to tell you soomethin', eh. I woos part of this alliance with Noah fer a while, eh, but joost today he wanted me to vote for you! And he's gonna go ahead and do it! We both gotta team up and vote him out!
(Dawn sighs)
Dawn: Ezekiel, I've seen glimpses of the future and it seems like nearly everything may turn out for the worst.
Ezekiel: Well, the least we can do is try, eh.
(She nods)
Dawn: Oh, and Zeke, thank you for telling me. Handshake?
(She extends her right hand. Zeke looks confused for a moment, and then starts shaking it)
Dawn: Er, you can let go now.
Ezekiel: A'yup!
(He tries to salute and smacks the bridge of his nose with his hand)
Ezekiel: YOWCHHHHH!
(Scene switch, again. Noah is back to sitting in the lawn chair unhappily. Blake walks by)
Noah: Blake?
Blake: I know, I know, 'get out'. I'm going, no need to worry.
(The suit-wearing kid starts to head off, but Noah calls him back)
Noah: Blake, I need to talk to you. I've made some bad choices in this game, and I regret them. But just when I tried to piece everything back together, things got screwed up more. And I don't want to lose because of it. I know I sound like I'm getting obsessed with the million, but can you do me a favor as a….[he shudders] a friend?
Blake: Sure, old pal! Anything!
Noah: 'Old pal'? Don't push it. Anyway, can you vote for Dawn in the campfire ceremony?
Blake: Sure thing, actually, I was already planning to do that. You and Zeke are a-okay, but Dawn seems a little weird to me.
Noah: Careful there, you don't want Dawn's fans to form a mob and kill you.
Blake: No sir, I don't!
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(The scene is the campfire pit, late at night. Blake, Dawn, Ezekiel, and Noah huddle around the campfire, having cast their votes. Chris stands in front of them)
Chris: Now, from what I can tell, this is gonna be one of the most dramatic campfire ceremonies we've ever had in all of Total Drama history. Let me get it started by asking a few probing questions.
(He creeps up behind Zeke)
Chris: Now, Freakzekiel, is there anyone here you feel might want to, you know, VOTE YOU OFF?!
Ezekiel: I hate cats, eh.
Chris: Never mind. Anyway, Dawn, have you noticed anything suspicious lately?
Dawn: [sincerely] Actually, I have. You're packing on the pounds at a quicker rate than usual. I'd really recommend a diet.
(Everyone else chuckles)
Chris: Forget I asked. Alright Blake, as the newbie, are you afraid our veteran contestants will try and pick you off, right here and now?
Blake: 'Veteran'? Wait, the people here are war heroes? Cool! Too bad I'm not allowed to fight in any wars.
Chris: Geez, seriously, couldn't we have found some actual normal people for this show?
Noah: If you want normal people here, I'd start by firing yourself.
Chris: Ha ha ha hilarious. I think you'll noticed I haven't asked you any probing questions yet. But, BUM DUM DA DA, I will!
Noah: [sarcastically] Oh the horror.
Chris: Now Noah, you've never exactly done well at sport challenges here on Total Drama.
Noah: What can I say? Sports aren't my forte.
Ezekiel: That rhymed, eh.
(After this umpteenth repetition of a dumb joke, no one even pays the homeschooled boy any attention)
Chris: So, anyways Noah, after this particular sport challenge, which you failed, are you afraid the one getting the boot might be you?
Noah: No, I'm not. Plus, I actually did well at this challenge. If a certain idiot who shall not be mentioned by name hadn't messed everything up, I would've even won.
Ezekiel: [stupidly] An idiot who shall not be mentioned by name. Wonder who that could be, eh?
Chris: Alright, this didn't work out as well as I'd hoped it would. Let's just get right down to business.
(He whips out a platter with three marshmallows on it)
Chris: Without any more drama-creating questions [noticing Zeke opening his mouth] and any more stupid comments from Ezekiel….
(Zeke closes his mouth)
Chris: …. tonight's first marshmallow goes to Blake.
(He tosses it to Blake, who catches it and grins)
Chris: Then, this next 'mallow is for…
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Ezekiel: I loike chockate milk.
Chris: Ooh, Noah and Dawn are the bottom two! Finally, our last marshmallow goes to…
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(Chris whips the marshmallow at Zeke, and it flies right into his open mouth. He grabs at his throat and starts choking, and Blake does the Heimlich maneuver on him until he coughs it up and it flies back out, smacking Chris in the face)
Chris: Ew, grossness!
Noah: Beg pardon, but how did Zekiel get two marshmallows?
Chris: Because you and Dawn tied with two votes each. That means it's time for a….tiebreaker!
Noah: [sarcastically] A tiebreaker to break a tie? That makes no sense whatsoever.
(Chris doesn't reply, he just presses a button on his wooden stand and out of the ground rises a circular podium. Robotic arms grab Noah and Dawn and drop them onto it)
Chris: Now, we'll settle this score the way we settle any on Total Drama….with a wrestling match! Go!
Noah: I don't wrestle. Plus, when have we ever done wrestling before?
(Sierra teleports in out of nowhere)
Sierra; Season 3, Total Drama World Tour, Episode 14, Greece's Pieces, Rated TV-PG, with a run time of twenty-two minutes General positive reviews. I was in that one!
(She teleports away. Noah ignores everybody else, sits down on the podium, and starts reading his book)
Chris: Looks like Noah refuses to do anything. Guess it'll be an easy victory for Dawn!
Dawn: Actually, as wrestling can sometimes lead to violent confrontations, I avoid it whenever possible.
Chris: Great. So they both refuse to do anything. Well, I might as well set it in Earthquake Mode just for fun
(He presses another button and the podium starts quaking. Noah and Dawn both bounce around and fall off, Noah still reading his book as he falls, and they both land hard on the dirt)
Chris: Quick, which one of them hit the ground first? Falling out of the ring is an automatic loss.
(He grabs one of the cameras and looks at it. Then he grins annoyingly and turns to face the four campers)
Chris: Okay, I've seen the video, and I can officially tell you that the person who hit the ground after the other one and is now safe is…
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…
…
…
…Noah. Bye-bye, Dawn.
Author's Note: I know most of you are really sad to see Dawn go, and I've explained why it was her time to go in the author's note at the end. If you're really upset about the elimination, please read that!
Chris: Oh, Noah, here's a marshmallow.
(He pulls a marshmallow out of his pocket and throws it at the egghead, who lets it fall in the dirt. Meanwhile, Zeke runs up to Dawn)
Ezekiel: I tried to help you, eh. I'm really sorry you have to go. I'll miss you!
Dawn: Zeke, there's nothing you could have done about it. I foresaw that this would come to be. And maybe it's not all bad. Noah seems to despise Blake a lot less. And the same goes for me with you.
(With that, she gives him a quick kiss, he faints, and she drops down the Chute of Shame, arriving at the Underground Playa des Losers)
Heather: Dawn? You got voted off? Hah. Figures. The nice ones always go early.
Zoey: Not as early as you apparently.
Heather: There's no need for a reminder.
Owen: What if you have a bad memory? Like Mr. Coconut.
Mr. Coconut: - - - - -
Dawn: Um, where am I?
Lightning: Sha-Underground Playa des Losers!
Mike: Believe me when I say, it is epic.
Dawn: Well, I guess there's nothing to do but enjoy my stay here.
(She walks over to the counter and grabs a purple smoothie)
Dawn: But to be honest, I will miss Ezekiel.
(Back above ground, Noah is reading his book in the cabin when Ezekiel stomps in)
Ezekiel: Ya know Noah, that was really mean, eh.
Noah: And I care because? No offense, but it is a competition.
Ezekiel: Yoo're soonding like Heather again!
Noah: [frowning] Look, your crush got voted off. Boo hoo. Okay?
Ezekiel: You joost don't understand 'cause there's not a single other human bean you care aboot, eh. A'yup.
(Noah is a bit annoyed by this accusation)
Noah: Look Zeke, that's not true. In fact, there's a girl here on this very island that I like. It's- - -
(The screen cuts off right as he tells Zeke, and goes to Chris at the Dock of Shame)
Chris: Haha, gotta keep it at least a little suspenseful, don't I? Is poor Freakzekiel gonna forget all about the game now? Who does Noah like? And is he really in it to win it? Find out next time, on TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!
(Credits play)
Voting Confessionals
Static
Blake: Well, I'm voting for Dawn then.
Static
Dawn: I've seen what will happen, and I can't change the future. But I'll vote with Zeke anyway. My vote goes to Noah.
Static
Ezekiel: STOOPID NOAH IS GONNA GET VOTED OFF BY ME, EH!
Static
Noah: Dawn. Sorry, but I have to do it in order to win. And even if I voted for Blake now, it would do no good as then I would get eliminated.
Dawn: 2
Noah: 2
Ezekiel: 0
Blake: 0
Eliminated: Mike, Zoey, Mr. Coconut, Owen, Heather, Lightning, Dawn
Psycho Psychos: Blake, Ezekiel, Noah
Crazy Crazies: Annette, Izzy, Staci
Right away, I apologize for eliminating Dawn. She's up among my favorite characters, and although I would have loved for her to win, things just didn't work out that way. Her plotlines had come to the end and she just didn't fit in with the post-merge story. For those who are huge fans of Dawn, I hope you won't stop reading because of this. Dawn will still appear in aftermaths, any scene with Underground Playa des Losers, and the finale. In other news, next update may take a while, thanks for reading, and please review!
~TheImpossiblyAwesomeWriter
Next Time: When five mini-challenges end up being the most dangerous yet, is Ezekiel out for Noah's blood after what he did to Dawn? And are Staci's lies actually, not lies?