Episode 14: Zeke the Unmeek Geeky Freak
Hi guys, I'm super sorry about the longest time it's ever taken me to update. Over a month! After my vacation, I was caught up updating my other stories. Updates should come quicker now. Drum roll, please. We've reached 2,500 views! That's halfway to my next big goal of 5,000 views. It'd be much appreciated if you all helped me reach it. Thanks to all the reviewers so far, especially Knifez R Us and FoxfaceFan1. I really appreciate reviews, so non-guest reviewers will get a reply and a prize. In other news, my poll for who you want to win TDTIR is still up on my profile page, and it's a lonely poll indeed, so please take a minute and vote on it if you haven't already.
One final thing: Fanfiction user MeAndYouForeverBaby has started a forum called Total Drama Writer's Forum. The idea is to get all the main Total Drama writers on here to join it. It's pretty fun so far, so if you write TD fanfic, then check it out!
(Chris is shown standing on the Dock of Shame)
Chris: Last time, on Total Drama The Island Reborn, we had our most extreme challenge yet. Mini golf! During the nine holes of extremeness, Ezekiel was totally psycho and we were forced to throw him off a cliff. Annette's illegal alliance earned her a homing beacon golf ball, but she still failed. In the end, it was down to Izzy and Noah on the most epic hole of all time. Noah seemed sure to win when Ezekiel showed up again and screwed everything up. I mean, really screwed everything up. The Psychos ended up losing, with Noah's alliance all set to get rid of Blake once and for all. However, the aforementioned genius couldn't bring himself to do it after Blake's naïve kindness, and once he broke the news to Zeke that they'd have to vote for Dawn, the Canadian homeschooler quit his alliance, siding with the nature girl. In the end, it came down to a dramatic tiebreaker between nature and Noah which Noah won by a whisker. We're half-way through the season, and somehow only have six contestants left. What am I gonna do to fit in thirteen more episodes? And who will be the next to take a fall down the Chute of Shame? Find out right now, on TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!
(Theme song plays. It shows the camera sweeping past the dock, where Chris waves at it. Chef smiles at it, then gulps as it comes nearer to him, and smacks him in the face. After he disappears the camera zooms up the cliff, where it shows a squirrel punching Zeke in the face. As the camera "falls" off the cliff so does Zeke. Hitting the water, bubbles cover the screen. When they clear, Izzy is swimming away from a shark, only to turn around and bite the shark back. Above the water, Noah is sitting in a boat, reading his trademark book, when Zeke lands on him. Right after the moment of impact, the camera zooms to the forest, where Mike is petting a raccoon. The raccoon bites his finger, causing him to wince in pain, inhale deeply, then scream at the raccoon. The camera zooms to the waterfall, where Annette is singing on top of a log that goes over the waterfall. At the bottom, Dawn is sitting cross-legged on a beam of wood going across a small lake, looking very peaceful. Suddenly, Annette flies past her and her mouth falls open. The camera moves to the outhouse confessional, where a bear is knocking on the door. Blake sticks his head out, screams, and then ducks back in. Chef's kitchen is then seen, with a small television in the background upon which Courtney and Cody can be seen. Lightning is dumping protein powder into his mouth, and then fist-pumps, while Heather is tied to a chair, being force-fed Chef Hatchet's special soup by Chef himself. The camera moves outside to the campfire pit, where Owen is holding Mr. Coconut and rocking back and forth giggling. Staci is seen on the dock, blabbing on while reading from a gigantic stack of papers. The camera shifts a little, showing Chris on the other side of the dock, covering his ears and yelling. He runs around and falls into the water. When he surfaces, in classic cartoon style, his head steams over in anger, causing a fire. The camera follows the fire embers up, and then back down, revealing the campfire. Zoey is sitting in front of it, looking nervous, before her eyebrows scrunch up and she gives an evil grin, only to look around when she sees Zeke and Mike sitting on either side of her. The camera pans out to show all 13 contestants sitting on stools around the campfire, as Chris stands nearby and grins at the camera. A wooden sign is seen, where neon letters light up, saying TOTAL DRAMA THE ISLAND REBORN)
(Noah opens his eyes and stretches, then jumps up, shocked. He is in a small metal room with no visible doors or window. The walls are silvery and seem to be made out of titanium. On the metal floor around him are the other five campers, still sleeping)
Noah: What the heck? Probably one of Chris' sick pranks. [shaking a couple people] Hey! Izzy, get up! Blake! Hello?
(Within a few seconds he has the other five awake, as they gasp at their surroundings)
Ezekiel: Where are we, eh?
(A panel in the wall opens, and a megaphone pops out)
Chris: [megaphone] Hey all! How do you like my mancave?
Noah: Hilarious, Chris. Now get me out of here before the ceiling implodes. I take it we're underground.
Chris: Correctomono! You're in a small bunker, ten feet below sea level, er, dirt level. And the first part of today's challenge is to escape! There are five ways to get out, and each one can only be used once.
Staci: But there are six of us!
Chris: Exactly! The one of you who doesn't make it out will be eliminated from the challenge. And in the next one plus one plus one plus one challenges, we'll get rid of you guys one by one until only one is left standing, who is the one winner for his one team!
Noah: [sarcastically] Overuse of the word 'one' is illegal in most Canadian territories.
Chris: Fine then. Three! You may begin escaping.
(All six of them quickly cluster around a vent in the far corner. Unlike the one Izzy escaped through in the Underground Playa des Losers, this one is much smaller)
Ezekiel: None of us'll ever fit through that, eh.
Noah: Prepare to be proved wrong.
(Noah, both the skinniest and the shortest of the group, sticks his head in the vent and wedges his shoulders in. He climbs the rest of the way in, and quickly gets stuck)
Noah: Uh, I'm getting a little claustrophobic in here.
Blake: I'll help you!
Noah: I would appreciate it if you didn't- - -AAAAAAH!
(Before the bookworm can finish his sentence, Blake shoves him from behind and he shoots forward into the vent, out of sight. The entrance to the vent is closed by a metal panel, as Chris said would happen, but it wouldn't have mattered anyway as no one else could fit through. The five left in the bunker-like room immediately start searching for other ways out)
Izzy: Haha, this is the perfect challenge for Izzy! No one could escape better.
(She gets down on all fours and starts sniffing the floor, looking for a way out. With a cry of 'Aha!' she rips up another panel and reveals the dirt underneath. Shrugging her shoulders, she begins to tunnel and is quickly out of sight)
Blake: That was a little weird.
Annette: You don't say….
(She walks over to a wall and leans against against, flipping a switch and opening a door. She steps through it and it closes behind her. The entrance to Izzy's tunnel also closes)
(Scene switches to Noah. He worms his way out of the vent into a larger one, which slopes upwards. After following that for several twists and turns, he emerges out of the ground in a clearing. Izzy and Annette are already there. Noah grins)
Static
Noah: Okay, this is becoming almost too easy. Seriously, I'm in the final six with the only other serious competitor being Izzy. Although we're on opposite teams, I'm sure I can woo her into an alliance someday. The merge can't be too far away. My main problem right now is that Zeke's out for my blood. He's an idiot, but he's determined. I don't like that combination.
Static
Ezekiel: Oi'm never gonna stop tryin' until I get Noah eliminated, eh. The problem is how to do it. I've made up a list of several possible strategies.
(He holds up a piece of paper and clears his throat)
Ezekiel: Ahem. Strategy number one. Zeke wins. Number two. Noah doosn't win. Number three. Chockate milk. Number four. I hate squirrels. Number five. Zeke wins. Number six. Noah doosn't- - -
(The confessional cam cuts him off)
Static
End of Confessionals
Staci: Now what?
Ezekiel: There's gotta be some more ways outta here.
Blake: Two more, to be precise.
(Ezekiel walks over to the wall where Chris' megaphone popped out of. He finds hinges and opens up yet another panel to find the megaphone, connected to a robotic arm. But something doesn't look right. Meanwhile, Staci and Blake continue to poke around)
Blake: There must be something obvious we're missing.
Staci: Yah, but what?
(Ezekiel reaches his arm in behind the megaphone and shoves away a piece of cardboard painted to look like metal. Behind it is a small crawlspace with a ladder leading upwards, which he quickly climbs up. A true metal sheet slides behind him, closing the exit)
Blake: What's this?
(He suddenly notices a big red button on one of the walls with a sign saying 'Teleporter' pointing to it. He presses it and suddenly appears in the clearing. The other escaped campers and Chris are standing around)
Chris: Congratulations, groovy cats! You'll be moving onto the next part of the challenge.
Annette: What about Staci?
Chris: We'll leave her there for now. That way she can't annoy me. Now, who's ready for the most epic obstacle course of all time?
Noah: You.
Chris: Nice one, Noah, but I'm not competing. I'll leave that to you guys. The obstacle course is two hundred yards away down this path. Running there's part of it, in fact. You all race at once. Last one across the finish line will be joining Staci in Loserville. Go!
(The five contestants take off, Izzy in the lead with Blake brining up the rear)
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(Izzy reaches the obstacle course first, with Zeke right behind her. The first obstacle is a field of slippery ice with razor sharp saw blades spinning around randomly, moving through the ice. Izzy immediately does a bunch of cartwheels, flips, and somersaults to get through the field, getting scraped up a lot in the process but just laughing it off. Zeke grimaces)
Static
Ezekiel: That dooes not look loike fun, eh. But I'm gonna beat Noah if it's the last thing I do! As a matter of fact, it prob'ly will be the last thing I do.
Static
End of Confessionals
(As Zeke gingerly steps onto the ice, Izzy climbs up a bunch of spinning platforms to hop into a rotating tube. Blake and Noah show up at the obstacle course at almost exactly the same time. Noah spots Zeke in the lead and immediately throws himself on the cold field, crawling on his elbows and knees. Blake takes a little longer psyching himself up for the obstacle course. Meanwhile, Zeke has reached the first spinning platform and is clinging on for dear life, while Izzy pops out the other end of the tube, falling into a mud pit and looking up at a huge climbing wall in front of her. By the time she reaches the top, Noah has passed Zeke and is nearly to the tube with the toque-wearing teen close behind him. Blake is half-way across the ice and screams at the top of the lungs every time he gets within ten feet of a saw blade. Annette runs out of the forest and slips onto the ice. She quickly pulls herself back onto less slippery ground and glares at Chris, who is standing over to the side)
Annette: Illegal alliance? Ring a bell? This probably won't turn out well!
Chris: Yeah yeah, I'm getting to it already. You can take a shortcut to the tube.
(Annette opens her mouth to say something, but a giant spring pops up and sends her flying. She lands on top of Noah as he tries to enter the rolling cylinder, and they both fall down, allowing Zeke to pass them)
Static
Annette: That was a relief. I was beginning to think Chris had forgotten about our illegal alliance!
Static
Chris: Yeah, I'm starting to regret this alliance with the annoying girl. She's so persistent! I wish this alliance was like my one with Owen back in TDA. I had to keep reminding him we were in one!
Static
Noah: And, the unprofessional singer just cost me my lead. But don't worry. I'll get it back. Geez, funny thing about having a rival in the competition, it makes me actually wanna try for the million bucks.
Static
End of Confessionals
(Izzy is in view of the finish line. Upon reaching the top of the climbing wall, all one has to do is jump across platforms illogically levitating in the air to the end. The difficult thing is that the platforms get progressively smaller and bounce around more. The crazy girl shrugs and starts running across, not really paying attention to where her feet are going. On the next to last one, she slips and falls, managing to grab on with her right hand and hanging over a long drop back down to the field of ice. She slowly starts trying to pull herself back up. Over at the rock wall, Annette and Noah have started climbing, with the bookworm going at a slightly faster pace. But he didn't count on Zeke catching up and knocking him down. The prairie boy and the egghead tumble to the ground, where Zeke tries to pin Noah down, but the sarcastic genius gets up and runs over to the rock wall. Some of Ezekiel's feral side seems to have come out, however, as he bounds up the wall and clears the remaining distance to the finish line in a single bound, completing the challenge and knocking Izzy off)
Static
Noah: Alright, I was not expecting that. Beating Zeke at the remaining parts of the challenge might be a little harder than I thought.
Static
End of Confessionals
(The fall knocked Izzy out, but she quickly wakes up. She is lying in the middle of the ice field. Noah and Annette have just finished, and Blake is crawling out of the mud pit towards the climbing wall. Knowing she has to beat the part-time Scottish teen to stay in the challenge, she dashes helter-skelter through the ice fields as fast as she can, cackling maniacally. She falls out of the cylinder just as Blake reaches the top of the rock wall, quickly gaining on him. By the last platform, they're practically tied as Izzy dives and Blake leaps. Blake hits the finish line first and falls down onto the ice with Izzy)
Chris: And Izzy is our number one first-class loser! Actually, she was the second to lose, but whatever. Crazy dudette, enjoy some quality time with Staci!
(Chris flips a switch and Izzy falls down a trapdoor, landing in the bunker next to Total Drama's chattiest contestant)
Staci: Oh good! Somebody to tell lies, uh, I mean stories to! That reminds me, my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-gr eat-great-great-aunt Fancypants invented stories. Before her, people could only tell things to each other in a scientific manner. That got boring quickly, as you can imagine….
Izzy: Izzy's beginning to feel a burning desire to strangle each and every one of your ancestors personally, followed by you!
Staci: Geez. Touchy!
(Scene switches to the campgrounds, where Chef has set up a wooden platform with four ceramic plates hung on strings. Each plate has a picture of one of the contestants competing in the challenge, so Annette, Zeke, Blake, and Noah. The four are given slingshots and several stones)
Chris: This is a fun little game I like to call 'Shatter'. The goal here is to completely break your plate using the slingshots provided. Last one to do so is out. But be careful where you aim! Ya don't want to accidentally help your opponent's out by hitting theirs.
Blake: How often can we fire?
Chris: As often as you can reload. You may now begin failing!
(Zeke and Noah immediately take aim and shoot. Noah's stone hits his plate and breaks it, and the prairie boy's stone smacks Noah, knocking him out)
Ezekiel: [unconvincingly] Sorry, eh.
Annette: Ahem.
Chris: I'm getting to it, I'm getting to it!
(He pulls a remote control out of his pocket and presses a big green button. Annette's plate shatters)
Chris: Looks like it's down to the Zekey and the freaky!
Static
Blake: Okay, that was completely unfair.
Static
Chris: Annette is totally ticking me off! If I hadn't signed that stupid contract, I could just automatically eliminate her or something. But, if there's one thing I've learned in my years of scamming people, it's that there's always a loophole. You just have to find it.
Static
Ezekiel: Man, I'm sure doin' a good job avengin' Dawn's elimination, eh. She must be so proud!
Static
End of Confessionals
(In a nice relaxing spot at the Underground Playa des Losers….)
Dawn: I sense something bad on the island. What is with Zeke's aura lately?
(Back to the challenge. Blake and Zeke are firing stone after stone without hitting anything, The latter eventually hits the former's plate, but it only cracks a little. The plate sways back and forth a bit and knocks into Zeke's, breaking the strings holding it up. Zeke's plate falls to the ground andbreaks)
Chris: And the next member of Bunker Loserdom is Blake! Bye-bye.
(He again presses a button on a remote control and Blake falls down a chute, landing next to Staci in the bunker. Izzy is hanging from the ceiling. Quick as lightning (both the actual lightning and the jock) she grabs Staci's neck and starts shaking her around)
Blake: Izzy! Put her down!
(The crazy girl reluctantly drops Staci)
Staci: Thanks.
Izzy: Why'd I have to stop? That was so much fun!
Blake: You are one sick person.
Izzy: Don't be silly, Scottish guy, I haven't gotten the flu in years!
(Scene switch. Back with Chris and the three teens)
Chris: Alright campers, it's time for today's twist. Instead of having two more parts of this challenge, I'm combining them both together! Zeke and Noah's rivalry was just to funny to pass up, and I didn't want the final challenge to be just one of them versus Singy Girl over here. So all three of you are gonna be going for the win! Now, the first challenge was a robot rodeo. Basically, you simply had to ride robot bulls without getting tossed off and trampled.
Noah: 'Simply'. Yeah.
Chris: And the final challenge would have been facing down this fearsome Komodo Dragon!
(He points to a dark cave. A scaly webbed foot comes out of it, followed by another. Out of the cave, with dramatic music playing, comes Chef in a really cheesy lizard costume)
Annette: What the heck?
Noah: Okay, if you could afford afford actual crocodiles for the croc wrestling challenge, what's the deal with the reptilian Chef?
Chris: Yeah, I was in a lazy mood today.
Chef: Moo.
Chris: Chef, wrong animal! So, here's how it's gonna work. You guys ride your robotic bulls while Cheffy over there tries and attacks you. If your bull bucks you off, you lose. If Chef knocks you off, you lose. All clear?
Noah: Crystal.
(The three mount their metal steers, which try and buck them off with little success. Ezekiel is beginning to become feral again as his skin starts to glow olive green and his teeth somehow turn into points. Annette is nearly knocked off by her bull as it jumps about, but manages to hang on with one hand. Unfortunately for her, Chef spots this and lunges, knocking her off )
Annette: Dang it! I lost.
Chris: It's not over yet. Check this out! It's hysterical!
(Noah and Ezekiel are charging towards each other in a dangerous game of 'Chicken', both with fire in their eyes. Ezekiel is growing more feral by the second as Noah turns away at the last possible moment. Zeke shoots by him. Chef tries to knock over the homeschooler but is thrown to the ground. A now totally feral zombie Zeke smells weakness. He rips his toque off and kicks his shoes away, growling, and turns to face Noah. Then he charges)
Static
Annette: Wow. So the two crazy guys are charging each other on robotic animals, and I'm just sitting there when it occurs to me. Why the heck are they doing this?
Static
Chef: Dang, those dumb kids aren't gonna come out o' this alive. Take a lesson, y'all stupid teens watchin' this, and don't try this at home, suckers, don't try this at home.
Static
(Ezekiel is growling and jumping up and down in the confessional, tearing at the walls. He spots the camera and smacks it, twisting it upside-down)
Static
Noah: [seen upside-down] What is wrong with the camera?
(He turns it so he's seen right side up again)
Noah: That's better. Anyway, it looks like Gollum Zeke and I are stuck in a fatal game of chicken. And I'll tell you one thing. I am not going to be the chicken this time.
Static
(Chris is laughing his head off)
Static
End of Confessionals
(As Zeke continues to head directly for Noah, the bookworm also starts to charge. Their bulls pant heavily, which seems impossible considering they're robots. At the last second, the feral prairie boy realizes Noah has no intention of turning away, and he tries to dash to the side. But it's too late. The two bulls collide and a huge explosion happens. A mushroom cloud billows up around the island, and the noise is heard as far away as Japan, where it causes a car crash followed by a rather annoying traffic jam)
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
(The scene is the campfire at night, with the three, soon to be two, members of the Crazy Crazies sitting on various logs)
Chris: Crazies, Crazies, Crazies. Is it possible for me to say how disappointed I am with you guys? Yet another loss. You'll end up like Team Victory at this rate.
Staci: What's Team Victory?
Chris: Not important. Anyway, today's marshmallow ceremony is gonna be really short, so I'm tryin' to drag it out as much as possible. As you may have noticed, there are three of you. And two marshmallows. I'm no math genius, but even I know that those numbers are not the same. I think. Forget it. Tonight's first marshmallow goes to…
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…Izzy!
Izzy: Haha!
(The psycho catches her marshmallow and swallows it whole. Annette and Staci look fearfully at each other)
Chris: Geez, I told you this was going to be short. Tonight's final marshmallow belongs to none other than…
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…Annette!
Annette: I'm safe for now! With Izzy my pal!
Staci: Why did I have to go? I was awesome!
Chris: Not exactly.
Staci: I was the fan favorite!
Chris: Alright, now you're just flat out lying. Get outta here!
(He presses yet another button and Staci drops down the Chute of Shame. Staci pops out of the hole in the wall at Underground Playa des Losers)
Staci: Where am I?
Lightning: Sha-bam!
Staci: That didn't answer my question.
Owen: You're in a place worth a good deal more than a million bucks, my friend.
Mr. Coconut: - - - - -
Zoey: Nice to see you again, Staci.
Staci: It's not nice for me. I lost!
Heather: Who cares? You've always been a sucky character anyway.
Dawn: You shouldn't be so quick to let your temper simply dismiss people, Heather.
Heather: What do you know?
Dawn: A lot, actually.
Heather: Never mind. [to Staci] So what happened today?
Staci: Yah, a lot actually.
(She gives them a brief recap of what happened throughout the entire episode)
Lightning: Hah! That's sha-hilarious!
Dawn: Oh no! Ezekiel is letting his sadness blind him. The poor boy must think he can avenge me by getting revenge. And that's not at all the right thing to do. If only there was a way to tell him….
Mike: Actually, I might be able to help with that. See, there's something I haven't really gotten around to telling you guys yet.
Zoey: Wait, what?
Mike: See- - -
(The camera cuts to Chris on the Dock of Shame right as Mike begins to talk)
Chris: Yeah, CLIFFHANGERS! Gotta freaking love 'em. What was Mike talking about? How will Ezekiel try to get revenge on Noah next? Or has he given it up? And will the merge ever come? Find out next time, on TOTAL, DRAMA, THE ISLAND REBORN!
(Credits play)
Voting Confessionals
Static
Annette: Yes, I'm so happy right now! I was sure I was doomed, but Izzy just told me she wants to get rid of Staci! Oh, zip a dee doo dah, zip a dee ay…
Static
Izzy: Good-bye Staci! Never shall I see you again!*[1]
Static
Staci: Yah, I vote for Annette. Her illegal alliance is terrible! I'm certain Izzy is voting for her too.
Static
Staci: 2
Annette: 1
Izzy: 0
Eliminated: Mike, Zoey, Mr. Coconut, Owen, Heather, Lightning, Dawn, Staci
Psycho Psychos: Blake, Ezekiel, Noah
Crazy Crazies: Annette, Izzy
*[1] This is a reference to the ending line of Swiss Family Robinson (or at least the version I read). Although it's a great book, the ending line must be the dumbest concluding sentence of all time.
Bet you're all glad to see Staci go. I am too! Honestly, I'm super relieved that she's finally gone, even though I already knew when she was gonna get booted! Anyway, check out my poll and please review. It'll make my day, believe me. Like I said, updates should be quicker getting out. And feel free to check out my other stories, 'Total Drama Jurassic Park', 'The Chaotic Adventures of Bony Bones', and 'Mickey's Comeback'. Thanks!
~TheImpossiblyAwesomeWriter
Next Time: It's the merge! To celebrate this special occasion, an eliminated contestant is returning, a former camper is debuting, and Chef will be competing in the challenge! (Gulp.) In three challenges based on luck, what will happen when Scottish Blake, Chef's rivalry with Izzy, and the do-anything-tow-win former camper all come together? Find out next episode, due in a week or two.