"Everything's fine. Thanks," he said quickly, trying not to seem hung up on it.
"Was it something about your mom?"
He shook his head. "She's alive and well in Vegas. In her last letter, she told me that she was preparing for another lecture on Tristan and Isolde, one of her favorite works."
"Was it your doctor about your headaches coming back?"
He raised an eyebrow, wondering why Derek felt the sudden urge to talk to him, though he wasn't going to complain about it. He also wondered how Derek knew his headaches had come back, considering he hadn't talked to him in a week. "When I talked to him a week and a half ago, he gave me a few natural remedies that seem to be working for the time being." Reaching back, he rubbed his neck, looking back out the window.
"So who was it?"
He screwed his eyes shut, groaning to himself. This was not the turn he wanted this conversation to take: he wanted one for the better, and it definitely was one for the worst. Licking his lips, he thought about the best way to word it. "I only left him a letter, because he'd fallen asleep by the time I realized what I'd done," he started softly, looking down at his hands. "And he finally stopped being so pissed off at me that he called so I could give him an actual, formal apology for using him. He's going to let me take him out for a coffee and explain why I did what I did, because not only did I hurt the only person I've ever truly loved, but I hurt someone who was completely innocent in the process. I can't even put into words how sorry I really am for this happening, Derek. I can't. I've tried so hard over 100 times on your voicemail and with over 150 text messages, but the words don't exist to explain how horrible I felt and knowing how much I hurt you is the most difficult thing I've ever dealt with. I just… I blew it, I know I did. I hope that one day, you can find it in yourself to forgive me. I don't care if that day's today, tomorrow, or ten years from now, but I hope it comes." He exhaled, exhausted at how much he'd just put out on the table.
"Did you mean it?"
He paused. "Did I mean what?"
"When you said you'd leave the FBI if it meant it'd make me happy?"
Pain went right through his heart, but he nodded. "I did. I've had offers from the CIA and other government entities before. I've been on the team so long because it was like a family, but if one member of the family isn't happy with me, I'm not going to stick around and make it awkward for everyone else when I'm the last thing that one person wants to deal with."
He tried to figure out Derek's reaction, but there wasn't one. He kept his position in his seat, gripping the steering wheel and staring straight ahead, watching the streets. Part of him knew it was because he was a profiler and didn't want Spencer to know what he was thinking, but the other part thought he was considering telling him to leave the team.
"Does anyone know?"
"JJ suspects something, but I didn't tell her. I don't exactly advertise our relationship, or perhaps our past relationship, so I don't know how she found out."
"Did Rossi show up at your apartment with a bottle of scotch too?"
Too? "I told him I wasn't a fan of scotch, and he told me I'd learn. The stuff is practically liquid truth and I'm sorry, I told him everything, but I didn't make you the bad guy, because you're not. I am. I did this to us and I took the heat for all of it."
"Did the same to me."
He smiled to himself, wondering if things were going back to normal with the two of them, considering the fact they were currently having a conversation without snide remarks or completely ignoring each other.
The bliss was short lived when Derek's phone started ringing. He shifted in his seat, taking the phone out of his pocket and checking the caller ID and answering.
"Yeah, Baby Girl?"
"I've found our baddy. At least, I'm pretty sure and almost positive I've found him."
He put the phone on speaker. "Tell me about him."
"27 year old Jason Thomas. He had a fiancée who took off on him with another guy two weeks before the wedding. The guy put everything into the relationship, even moving across the country to be with her, and she left with another guy. All three of our victims unsurprisingly look just like her. I'm sending everyone his picture right now."
Spencer looked at his phone when it went off and saw the picture.
"Thanks, mama. Anything else we should know about the guy?"
"Well, you know about his affinity for stabbing people, but the 14? They were set to be married the 14th of this month. Since today's the 13th, I'm not feeling too warm and fuzzy about my pretties being there trying to find him. Everyone stay safe, please."
"We will," Spencer spoke up, before studying the picture and putting his phone back into his pocket.
Derek hung up, setting his phone down on the dashboard. It was now only 10:45 and they only had another hour and fifteen minutes to hopefully catch this guy before something bad happened to another woman.
An hour had passed and they hadn't seen the unsub, nor had they received a call that someone else on the team did. When the time for the stakeout was almost up, Spencer's phone started ringing. Checking the caller ID, he put the phone on speaker and answered it.
"Hotch, you have Morgan and I. Did you find anything?"
"We don't have anything here, and I haven't gotten a call telling me anyone else has. I have Garcia looking up his address and workplace. If we don't have anything in the next half hour, I'll have you and Morgan go to his residence, see if you can find anything."
He eyed Derek, who nodded slightly. "No problem, Hotch. Is the ex-fiancée-"
"She's in protective custody right now, so he can't get to her."
Spencer chewed on his cheek, thinking. "So he's targeting her over and over again without directly attacking her. What if he won't stop until he's able to get to her?"
"He's going to be sorely disappointed, because she's not being released until he's in custody," Derek said, watching out the window.
"I'll send you two the address once Garcia has it."
"No problem."
He hung up, putting his phone in his pocket and eyeing Derek. "Thank you."
Derek raised an eyebrow. "For?"
"Not turning into a serial killer?" he said with a slight laugh, avoiding eye contact.
When Derek didn't speak immediately, he regretted his decision to make a joke. Then Derek smiled, shaking his head. "You would've caught me too easily."
Spencer smirked, glad that he and Derek were talking again, even if they weren't back to where they were before.
Derek's phone went off a half hour later and he saw the address. Putting it into the GPS, he started the car. "We didn't want to sleep tonight anyway, right?"
He shrugged, buckling himself in as Derek pulled away, driving.
"When we get there," Derek started, taking a turn, "I'll take the lead, you stay behind me. Am I clear?"
"Crystal clear." He felt somewhat overwhelmed with Derek still seeming overprotective of him.
Parking in front of the house, Derek undid his seatbelt, reaching in the back and grabbing the vests, handing one to Spencer. He put on his own and got out of the car, Spencer following. They walked up the front steps of the house, Derek pounding on the door.
"Jason Thomas, FBI," he called out, waiting for a response. They heard shuffling inside and Derek stepped back, kicking down the door and running in.
The unsub grabbed a kitchen knife, before taking off through the back. They went after him, Spencer calling Hotch.
"Hotch, we have him and he's armed with a knife on the run, out the back of his house." He hung up, running after Derek and stuffing his phone into his pocket. The back door was open and he stepped out to see Derek had the unsub held against the wall. He saw him raise the knife and his eyes widened, running over and pushing Derek out of the way. He held an arm against his throat and looked him in the eyes, holding the arm with the knife as tight as he could.
"You think you can take away your pain by hurting someone else? You think it's that easy? By hurting people who look like her, you're only causing more pain in other people." Biting his lip, he continued, attempting to hold down his arm. "We can help you. Just drop the knife and we can talk about it."
"Reid," Derek snapped, trying to get him to stop talking and arrest him. The use of his last name took him by surprise long enough for him to loosen his grip on the unsub's arm. Immediately after turning his face to look at Derek, the unsub took the opportunity to dig the knife into his side.
Spencer winced, his eyes widening, keeping his eyes on Derek. Derek ran over, throwing the knife out of his hands and slamming the unsub into the wall, cuffing him.
Meanwhile, Spencer whimpered, reaching up to his two-way radio. "Hotch, we need an ambulance to his residence immediately."
"Did you have to shoot?"
He took a deep breath, wincing. "No, he stabbed someone else."
Hotch looked at JJ, who called the ambulance. "Reid, who?"
Derek sighed, reaching up and pressing the button. "He got Reid, and he's bleeding pretty badly, Hotch. Hurry."
"Try to keep him stabilized, we'll be right there."
Once the team arrived on the scene, Derek pushed the unsub toward Hotch, kneeling beside Spencer and pressing a hand against his side.
"Spencer, are you still with me?"
He whimpered softly, looking up at him through half-lidded eyes.
"There we go, stay with me." He rolled Spencer onto his uninjured side, hoping it would help stop the bleeding.
"I'm sorry, Derek," he whispered, wincing. "For everything, I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it." He turned to Hotch. "Where are the medics?"
"Two minutes out."
"There we go, Spencer. Just two minutes. Can you hold on for two minutes?" he looked down at him, pressing his hand down. "Come on, it's just two minutes."
He sighed, biting down on his lip, hoping it would help with the pain. "I'm really sorry, Derek."
"Kid, you took a stabbing for me. Shut up about being sorry right now."
When the ambulance came, the team all stepped aside, letting the EMTs get through to him. One of them rested his hand on Derek's arm. "Sir, we can take over from here."
He exhaled, looking at Spencer. "Spencer, the EMTs are here, you're going to be fine." He paused, waiting for a reaction, and his face fell when he didn't get one. "Spencer? Spencer, come on."
"Derek," Rossi said, helping him up. "Let them do their job."
He sighed, stepping back and watching. He saw Hotch talking to one of the EMTs, most likely letting them know they'd meet him at the hospital, and walked over to Derek, patting his arm.
"You can catch me up at the hospital."
He motioned toward Spencer. "You want me to leave him?"
Hotch turned to one of the EMTs. "Can he ride along?"
"We have to go now," he explained, helping the other get Spencer onto the stretcher.
Derek nodded, following them to the ambulance and sitting down, grabbing Spencer's hand and holding it.
Rossi sighed, looking at Hotch. "When you said you'd take care of it-"
"I know." He took the keys to the SUV out of his pocket. "I put them together on the case, hoping I'd get them talking and stop acting so distant, which they did. I'd say they even started getting along again." He cleared his throat, turning around and walking to the SUV.
"And you think this is your fault?"
"Dave, I sent them to his house unprotected with no back-up."
"We thought he was out targeting his next victim and that he wouldn't be home. You sent them just to scope it out, not to find him. Nobody knew what would've happened."
He sighed, getting in and starting the car. "Did Derek tell you?"
He shook his head. "He was too busy trying to stop the bleeding. I'm sure we'll get the story once we get to the hospital. They're not going to let him back with the kid, considering he'll need to go up to surgery and get fixed up."
Hotch exhaled, raising his eyebrows. "We're in for a long night."
At the hospital, they arrived to find Derek sitting in the waiting room, his head buried in his hands. JJ was the first to walk over, sitting beside him and rubbing circles on his back. He bit his lip, running a hand over his face.
Hotch sat across from him. "Morgan, I know it's a hard time for you, but I need to know what happened."
He thought to himself. "He took the hit for me, and it's my fault."
"How so?"
"We went into the house, I went first. We saw him pick up the knife out of the butcher block and take off into the backyard, so we had to get him before he had another victim. I went in the backyard to get him while Spencer called you. I had him against the wall and was holding him there, trying to get my cuffs out. Spencer saw what I didn't see and the unsub raised his knife at me. To tell you the truth, I'd forgotten it was even there in the moment. He ran over and shoved me out of the way, pressing him against the wall and trying to restrain him." He swallowed, clearing his throat. "He tried to talk him down, but my instinct was to protect him, so I said his name, hoping he'd get the hint and cuff him. I ended up distracting him just long enough for him to drop the unsub's arm and get stabbed in the side. I got the guy after that, but the damage was done. I tried to stop the bleeding and he called for you guys, which I have to admit, even when I'm in a panic, I wouldn't think to do."
"Reid's smart and always keeps calm when something happens to him on the job. He got shot in the leg and continued to talk down a dangerous unsub, lest we forgot?"
"How could we?" Rossi asked. "We had to hear Morgan complaining about it for the next week."
Derek looked up at him.
"What?" Emily started. "It's not like you didn't know he was this accident prone when you pursued him."
He shrugged slightly as Hotch changed the subject, not wanting to have Derek more upset than he already was. "Did the EMTs say anything, or the emergency room staff?"
He shook his head. "They kept him stabilized for most of the ride, but apparently the knife got in there pretty deep. As soon as we got here, they took him up to surgery and put him under. I was able to tell them not to give him narcotics beforehand, so at least we don't have to worry about that." He screwed his eyes shut, sighing. "I should've seen the knife. I should've remembered it was there and done something before he got hurt."
"It's not going to do you any good to blame yourself," JJ said softly, rubbing his back.
He chewed on his cheek. "I forgot, JJ. I forgot he had a weapon, when I saw him with it two minutes earlier."
"You're human, it happens."
"Yeah, and because I'm human, he's upstairs getting his side stitched up on a table."
"Derek are you still-" Rossi started.
He shook his head slightly, leaving the rest of the team to guess their thought process and go through the agonizing wait for word from his doctor.