The French Mistake : Bizarro World

I do not own the world of Supernatural or any of its inhabitants.

Chapter 7

Jensen drove the Impala back towards the motel in silence. In fact, neither man said much the entire way. Pulling into the parking lot, Jensen parked the car in the space directly in front of their lavish accomodations. Both men got out, and headed to the door. Removing the key from his pocket, Jensen unlocked it and walked into the darkened room. He felt Jared right behind him.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Jared reached over, and turned on the lamp that sat in between the two beds. He stared at the floor for a few minutes before his thoughts were interrupted by his co-star.

"Are you ok, J?" Stretching back on his bed, Jensen leaned against the headboard. "You're awfully quiet."

"Yeah, well, it's a lot to take in. Bobby's friend is turned into a vamp by God knows whom, and we have no choice but to kill him. You almost get me killed. Cas tells us that Balthazar may be messing with our minds..."

"Hey, wait, why do you say that?"

"Come on, Jensen. He arrives out of the blue telling us Cas sent him, only Cas doesn't know anything about it. On the show, that doesn't bode well in any circumstance. And that wasn't Balthazar. I mean, if we've learned anything from the script, never trust that angel."

Jensen rose from the bed, and tore off his jacket and shirt. "Yeah, well, that's Cas' concern. Look, J, I don't know about you, but I need a shower. You'd think after years of wearing stage blood, I'd be a little more used to the real thing." He stepped into the shower, and turned the water on. Closing his eyes, he let the hot, cleansing liquid flow over his sore and tired body, Jensen ruminated on the last few days of his life. A nightmare, that's what it was. The show was chock full of nightmares to be sure, but you stepped off set, and it was a normal life again. He wanted to go home. He wanted to be with Dani. He wanted to apologise to every member of the cast and crew for his lousy behavior the past few years. And he wanted to concentrate on his work with Jared. They could be friends, he knew that now.

When he felt pruny enough, he got out and wrapped a towel around his torso. Stepping back into the room, he headed for the duffel that held fresh clothes.

"Dude!" Jared stared at his co-star, surprised to see the other man walking around their room in nothing but a towel, and not a very large one at that.

Jensen laughed at Jared's wide eyes. "What? I have a towel on! You're not a prude, are you?" Shaking his head, he said, "Sorry, for a moment, I forgot we're not really brothers."

"You forgot?" Jared asked, stunned. He was beginning to believe that maybe this world was messing up Jensen's sense of reality. Playing brothers for as long as they had still had not affected the lack of a friendly relationship between the two men. Things were changing though, subtly, but changing. There seemed to be a certain comfort zone created by their enforced togetherness.

"My brains are scrambled, ok? I said I was sorry." Jensen hurriedly dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, tossing the towel over the rack in the bathroom. He returned to the bedroom, and lay on the bed. He slipped his arms behind his head, trying to avoid his pillow getting wet from his damp hair.

"Well, in the time we've worked together, we've never been alone for so long, on or off the set." Staring down at the ugliness that was 70s carpeting, he sighed. "I guess it's all just getting to us both. And I miss Gen."

"What about that taun-taun you own? Bet you miss that too." Realizing he had made a massive faux pas, he apologised quickly. "Sorry, J. I didn't mean that. I know it's hard. I miss Dani, too. I'm sure they're worried out of their minds. Not to mention the rest of the cast and crew."

Just then, the cell phone rang. Jensen reached over and popped it open, seeing Bobby's name glaring at him. "Shit, it's Bobby. What do we tell him?"

Jared had no answer. He knew the man-turned-vampire had been a hunter friend of Bobby's for who knew how long, and now he was dead, at their hands. "Don't tell him anything. Just say we're on our way back first thing in the morning."

Nodding, Jensen put the cell up to his ear, and said, "Yeah, Bobby. No, everything's alright. Yes, Sam is still alive." He turned to Jared and rolled his eyes. "Look, we're really tired right now, and I'm all ready for bed. Yeah, Sam is in the shower. We'll tell you all about it tomorrow. Sure. Good night." He hit the 'end' button, and closed the phone. "This is going to suck, J, having to tell Bobby his friend is dead."

"I know." Jared rubbed his face. and yawned. "I think I'll take you up on the suggestion, and get in a quick shower. We may as well start early in the morning." By the time Jared was finished in the bathroom, he saw that Jensen was asleep on top of the covers. Lying back on the bed dressed in his underwear and t-shirt, Jared slipped beneath the blanket and closed his eyes. He could still feel the vamp's hot breath on his face. He hoped he didn't dream about it.

"Hey, J?"

Surprised to hear a voice coming from the other bed, Jared responded, "Yeah?"

"Sorry I almost got you killed. I was uh...scared, you know? I thought I was gonna pee my pants there."

"Uh huh...me too. But you know, if you ever do that to me again..."

"Won't happen, man. Good night."

"Night, Jensen," Jared answered, rolling over onto his side. He did dream, but it was a pleasant one, one where he was back home.

OoOoOoOoOoO

The next morning, Jensen and Jared dressed, and after grabbing a less than satisfactory breakfast of bad coffee and biscuit sausage sandwiches from a local fast food joint, they drove back to Bobby's.

"Is that you, boys?" Bobby called out. Seeing the box in Jared's hands, Bobby asked about it. "Didn't you leave that with Blake? He said he really needed it."

"Bobby, when we arrived at your friend's house, we uh...we were attacked." Jared wanted to spare the older man any unnecessary pain, but there was no easy way to say what needed to be said.

"What the hell are you talking about? Is Blake ok?"

"No, he isn't. Bobby, he was a vampire," Jensen blurted out. "He tried to kill...Sam. I had to cut the thing's head off. It was wild. He was this close to biting Sam..."

"Dean," Jared hissed.

"I had to find something sharp in the trunk of the car, and then I snuck up on the vamp and lopped..."

"DEAN!" Jared glared at Jensen. "It's Bobby, man. Have a heart."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry, Bobby. I was caught up in the excitement. I mean, I've never done that...I mean...oh, shit, nevermind." His voice trailed off as he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

Jared whispered at him to show some consideration.

Jensen shrugged. It was all true, after all. If he'd been there, he was sure the older man would have done the same thing.

Bobby opened the box and lifted out the statue. He looked it over, then placed it on the desk.

Jared tried to show compassion for their TV mentor's loss. "He wanted the statue to give to his "master", whoever that is."

"The vamp who turned him," Bobby muttered. He went to the desk, and pouring whiskey into a used glass, took a deep gulp of the golden liquid. It burned on the way down his throat. "So at least he isn't suffering anymore." He took another drink. "He was a good man, and a good friend."

Jared felt bad. He also realized that on the show, hunters died horrible deaths all the time. Here in this reality, he and Jensen were now hunters who could easily die, and just as horribly. Dear God, get us home.

"I'm going out, boys. I'll be back later." Bobby grabbed his jacket, and slipping on his well-worn baseball hat, left the two men on their own.

"This sucks, J. I feel badly for the old guy, but what else could we do?"

"He knows that, Jensen. It just means I want to get the hell out of here before we become some vampire's meal du jour." Thinking for a moment, Jared closed his eyes, and prayed. "Castiel, please come down from wherever it is you are. We need your help." Opening his eyes, he glanced around the room and then at Jensen.

Jensen looked up at the ceiling. "Hey, Cas, we need you!"

The air filled ever so briefly with the sound of fluttering wings, then it was quiet. But in the middle of the room stood a slightly peeved-looking angel in a trenchcoat.

"What do you need, Dean?"

Jensen looked over at Jared, a smug look on his face. "Just like the show" he mouthed, giving his annoyed co-star a wink. "Cas, there's something we have to tell you. It's important you know what's going on around here."

"I believe neither of you seems to acknowledge what is happening here. Raphael has been looking for the weapons Balthazar stole. He will do anything to gain possession of them. Balthazar had the key to the storage room, but now he says he gave it to you. Where is it?"

Jensen turned his head slowly to Jared, who stared back. Both men knew nothing about a key except for the storyline in the latest script they'd been in the midst of filming before this fiasco. "Uh, Cas, we don't have the key," Jared said.

"You don't have the key? But he said..."

Jensen was feeling a bit put out now. "No, man, there is no key! Maybe your angelic brother is jerking your chain, as in lying?"

Cas paced the floor. "I don't think so. Balthazar is no hero, but he knows Raphael won't take him back."

"Dude, that was a line from the script," Jensen whispered to Jared.

"Yeah, I remember. So some things do seem to cross over into this world."

"He wouldn't betray me when his own...ass...is on the line. Are you two even listening to me?" Cas demanded when he noticed the Winchesters whispering amongst themselves. The timbre of his voice was lower than normal as he stressed, "This is important."

"Castiel, listen to us. There's something you need to know." Jared nervously looked from the angel to Jensen. "We...aren't Sam and Dean."

Cas narrowed his eyes as he looked at the two humans he was most familiar with in all the world. How could they not be Sam and Dean. He had sensed something...different...about them. But... "This isn't the time for jokes, Dean."

"It's no joke. We're actors. We play hunters on a TV show by the name of Supernatural. Dean and Sam Winchester. You're even in the show. I mean, everything in the show is real here."

Castiel tilted his head as he thought for a moment. His eyes narrowed just before he vanished.

"What the hell...?" Jensen swung his arms as he took in the room. The angel had left. "Wait...Cas...CAS! Damn it!"

Before he could say another word, Castiel had returned, with a nonplussed Balthazar at his side. "Tell me the truth. What have you done with the key?"

Balthazar sputtered as he tried to think up something to tell his brother, when he noticed Jensen and Jared in the room. "Oh, hell." Pasting a smile on his face, he greeted them. "Hello, boys." Turning to an angry Castiel, he said, "No more secrets, Castiel. I followed the plan. Really, I did."

"They say they aren't the Winchesters, Balthazar. So where are Dean and Sam? What have you done with them?"

"Cas, Virgil had been dispatched by Raphael to get the key, and you remember the plan we had of hiding it with the boys, a brilliant idea, by the way. Well, when Virgil arrived, I sent the boys to another universe with the fake key. But...I couldn't very well have two of each of them there, so I..."

Jensen and Jared were listening raptly as the two angels bantered back and forth, one angry, the other making excuses. Now this was the Balthazar they were used to.

"I had to do something with the real boys, so I plucked them from their world, and brought them here."

"You've put them in a great deal of danger, Balthazar." Cas wasn't sure what to do with the two actors, but he knew they didn't belong here. He would have to figure out how to return them to their rightful home, alive. More than that, he wanted to get the real Dean and Sam back.

"Oh, they're resourceful chaps. They've done ok so far, haven't they?"

Remembering that he was almost turned into a vampire, Jared sarcastically replied, " Yeah, barely."

"So why were you all sweetness and light before? So unlike the TV version of, well, you." Jensen fisted one hand, really wanting to hit the creature who tore him from his world.

"Oh, that. I was kidding, of course. Having some fun with you two. I didn't think you'd go tattling to my brother though."

"Balthazar, we need to return them where they belong, and get Dean and Sam back, now."

Just then, Bobby came in through the front door. Seeing Castiel and the boys with Balthazar set off alarms in his head. "What the hell is going on here?"

A/N: Ok, got a chapter in after all. This will be the only story I am working on right now. It's been too hard to write lately. I have another in the works (Re: Crowley) but I won't be posting it until I have a firm grasp on the storyline. One chapter won't cut it. Thanks for hanging in there.