The French Mistake : Bizarro World
I do not own the world of Supernatural or any of its inhabitants.
Chapter 8
"So, either of you care to explain what the hell they're doing here?" Bobby demanded, looking at Dean and Sam. His eyes then scanned the room from beneath his dirty baseball cap. They instantly stopped on Balthazar. Glaring at the casually dressed, blonde-haired angel, Bobby recalled what the boys had told him about Ellen, and how, for a brief moment, he and the dead hunter had been married. But not in this world. Ellen lived in a world whipped up by that bastardous angel. In saving the sunken ship Titanic, he had created an existence in which Ellen was married Bobby, and had given him a reason for living not tied to monsters and hunting. When the angel had set things right, she vanished back to her graveyard existence. All Bobby remembered was her first death where she had sacrificed her life for the boys. But Dean and Sam related everything that had happened as related by that asswipe angel. Bobby had no reason to doubt the story. The boys were, after all, closely linked to most of the angels, if not always by choice.
"Uh, Bobby," Jensen began.
"Anyone care to bring me up to speed? Those jackasses aren't tampering with time again, are they?" Despite his outward attitude, Bobby actually liked Castiel, but he didn't like nor trust Balthazar.
"Bobby, listen to me! Sam and I, I mean, Jared and I...well, we're not the Winchesters." Jensen glanced at Jared, and said nothing else. Let him elaborate if he wanted to.
Bobby made for his weapons locker in the corner of the living room, but was stopped by Castiel.
"Wait, Bobby. I only just found out myself, but this Sam and Dean...are not our Sam and Dean." Holding onto the arm that attempted to wrest itself free, he went on. "And they're not shape shifters. They're...actors."
"Actors. What the hell are you talking about?" Bobby glanced over at the two men he had nurtured once their dad had gone off in search of the yellow-eyed demon. Oh sure, they'd been behaving strangely the last few days, but they were Dean and Sam...weren't they? He went over to them, looking both men up and down, trying to find something that shouted 'these are not Winchesters", but there was nothing. They looked like Dean and Sam, they sounded like Dean and Sam. Hell, they smelled like Dean and Sam.
"Uh, Bobby, don't do that," Jared said, when he thought he'd caught the older man sniffing at them.
"So, you're telling me that these boys are actors who just happen to look like Sam and Dean Winchester."
"Yes," Castiel replied.
"How?" Bobby asked, still unsure of what he was hearing.
"Balthazar sent the real Winchesters to another world. In doing so, he brought over their duplicates, actors who say they play the Winchesters in that world...on a television program."
"Ok, so?" Bobby suddenly needed a good, stiff drink.
"We had to hide the key to the weapons room from Raphael. Balthazar told me that he had given the key to the real Dean and Sam before sending them to the other world. Only, it's not the real key. He has the real key hidden away safely, for now."
"You have the real key? And the real Dean and Sam think they have it." Jared turned to Jensen, who nodded, knowing what his point was.
"They'll die protecting that key. That doesn't leave them in a very good situation. How do you know this Raphael won't be sending someone to take them out?" Jensen remembered the script. If it matched what they had been rehearsing for days, Raphael may have already sent an assassin angel to kill the Winchesters.
Castiel looked down at the floor as he considered those words. He hadn't imagined that Raphael would have bothered with the alternate universe. He turned to Balthazar, who said one word. "Virgil."
"Right. But we can't help them." Giving an angelic sigh, Cas said matter-of-factly, "They're on their own."
The older man poured himself a whiskey, then drank deeply. "You're giving me a headache, Cas," he moaned, feeling like he was in some bad science fiction movie. "You two...are actors?"
Jared and Jensen both nodded simultaneously.
"So... what do you act in?"
Jensen cleared his throat. "It's a fantasy/horror show, based on...um...this world."
"It's called Supernatural," Jared added. "We play Sam and Dean...Winchester. In fact, everyone here is ...is in the show."
Bobby, whose curiosity was piqued, took a step closer. "So there's an actor who plays me?"
"Yeah, his name is Jim Beaver. Does a damn good job too, if you're any indicator." Jared actually smiled. "When we met you, it was like being with Jim. We couldn't tell the difference."
"So that's why you two knuckleheads have been behaving so oddly. I knew something was up, but I had no idea. You're big stars on a famous TV show, huh?" He shook his head, glad that he wasn't going crazy after all.
Jensen laughed. "We're not big stars, Bobby. By the way, I'm Jensen Ackles. He's Jared Padalecki."
"We're hardly big stars. In fact, we only have a few million loyal viewers. It's a...small network," Jared explained, shrugging.
"And the angels...?" Cas began. "Are we...?"
"Everyone is in the show. Angels too. You, him,..." Jensen said, nodding at Balthazar, "...Lucifer, Gabriel, Zachariah. Yeah, pretty much all of you."
"Fascinating." Castiel was actually curious about this other world too. But he still wondered if it were real, or a Balthazar construct. "Is the other world real or not?" he asked his rebellious brother.
"I don't know, Cas. I cast a spell and sent them away. It could be real, or it could have been a creation of the spell. I'm not sure. Does it really matter? We get Sam and Dean back, send those two there, and who cares what happens afterward."
"We do!" Jared protested. "We had lives back there. Families and our jobs."
"We need to get the real Dean and Sam back, but we have to be sure Raphael doesn't know where we are, or what Balthazar's done before we have the chance to set things right." Cas wandered over to the window, and stared out at the sky. He sensed nothing, fortunately.
"At least the real Winchesters won't be worrying about being killed by angels or monsters," Jensen observed to his co-star.
"True, but if they don't measure up to what we do, Bob won't take it lightly." Jared winked at Jensen as he imagined the hunters pretending to be actors. Surely they would be no better at acting than they were at being hunters. And the production crew, who already tread softly around their two stars, would probably be ready to string up the pretenders.
Meanwhile, the real Bobby Singer was glaring at the uncharacteristically silent angel in the corner. "So you did this. What're you gonna to do to fix things?" he demanded.
"There's nothing to fix, really," Balthazar said, wearing a brave albeit false grin. "Come on, Cas, I didn't do anything wrong. We just have to wait for the boys to figure out how to return. And they will."
"They have to find a way...you goddamn idjit!" Bobby took another drink, cursing the angel beneath his breath.
Jared whispered to Jensen, "If you and I have had to pretend to be hunters and fight monsters, what do you think they're doing in our place?"
"Everything we'd be doing, I guess. Acting, hanging out with the wives, getting on people's nerves, not talking..."
As the previous words finally sunk in, Jared realized that their copies, the real Winchesters, were in their world, doing their jobs, and interacting with their family and friends. "Aw, shit,' he muttered.
"What, man?" Jensen asked, concerned.
"Gen. If the real Sam is there, in our world, how do I know he isn't...you know...with MY wife."
Jensen froze. It was something he hadn't given much thought. The real Dean could be messing with Dani as well. "No, man, they wouldn't do that. Sam wouldn't, but Dean, on the other hand... If he's anything like the show's character..." He grimaced. "Oh, shit." He clenched his fists, but said, "No, Jared, man, they wouldn't. Despite how we play them, they have to be honorable guys, right? Right."
"No, you're right, Jensen, they wouldn't take advantage of a situation like this. They'd be too busy trying to figure out how to get back home."
"I think I'll be off now, gents." Before anyone could move, Balthazar was gone.
Pursing his lips in frustration, Cas said quickly, "I'll be back." In seconds, he was, holding a struggling Balthazar by the collar.
"Come on, Cas, I was just doing what we had discussed. I was following your instructions."
Castiel looked from Jensen to Jared. "It's true. He was only doing what I told him to do when I ordered him to hide the key. But in coming up with this novel solution, he may have created a paradox."
"What, like some sort of time travel thing?" Jensen asked.
"Not exactly. Balthazar may have created a world that seems very real, but in fact, is just a facsimile. A place where he could temporarily hide Dean and Sam."
Jared was close to hyperventilating. "So, Cas, you're saying, if we go back, we might cease to exist?" He turned to look at Jensen, only to find panic written on his co-star's face.
Cas exhaled, hating not knowing for sure, the consequences of Balthazar's actions. "Yes, it's very possible," he replied grimly.
Jensen began to pace. "I don't believe this, man. You're telling us that we may go back to nothing. Or worse, that we may not exist at all. This is insane. We did not ask for this!"
Jensen's rant was interrupted by the slightest breeze of air circling the room. Everyone found themselves facing a small group of men and women dressed in dark suits. Castiel and Balthazar knew instantly that Raphael's agents had found them. Stepping between the angels and the humans, Castiel made ready to fight his own brethren to protect the humans.
Balthazar saw this, and although it was against his nature to endanger himself, he too made ready to stand his ground. A rather shiny and sharp silver blade slipped from his sleeve into his waiting palm. "You know we don't have a snowball's chance in hell of winning, Cas."
Castiel said nothing, but he pulled his angel blade from its hiding place as well.
Jared glanced over at Jensen and Bobby. Not even sure if he had any reason to voice this, he said, "Guess we'd better join the fight too."
A/N: sorry for the delay. I am ending here because I want to start the new chapter with some excitement. Hope you're still hanging in there with us.