A/N:And it is done! Phew. Finally. It's been sitting on my drive for like: ages. Anyway... thank you to readers and reviewers. Please enjoy!
III.
When her high school exams come to an end, she is happy and determined to go home and pass out on her bed. Entrance exams are the worst!
Well... they aren't quite as bad as some of her nightmares, but still.
Punimon really doesn't care about exams, though he wouldn't. Digimon don't need an education like humans do, which is dumb. It's really dumb.
"Sleepy," he murmurs from her shoulder. She agrees, stepping forward onto the bus. She is followed by a girl with lavender hair and her red bird. Noriko nods at her because that's polite and they did just spend three hours or more on a really long test with few breaks and lots of panicking. Miyako only grunts and sits next to her, leaving her partner to scramble on the bus floor until she yanks him by his wings and winks with guilt at the bus driver as he pulls away. It must be odd for him, Noriko thinks, to see all these people and children with monsters that probably weren't there the last time he applied for a job and now were just part of the regulations, or working to be.
Punimon is too sleepy to really comment, and so is she. It's still odd to think about.
"But Mama-" a voice whines from a nearby seat, and a woman shushes him, sounding angry.
"No buts- we don't have money to get back on the bus!"
"But Poyomon's acting weird!"
Noriko peeks open an eye. There is a little boy with a white blob and it's shaking, the shudders are rather weird to be honest. It was like it wanted to go to the bathroom or something. It did not, however, and merely began to glow white. She instantly flinches, realizing just what that light could do to a bus driver. Then, not thinking of Punimon, she snaps from her chair and toward the child, shielding the light from striking the rearview mirror. She doesn't expect it to hurt, but there is a sudden pleasant tingling when her arms wrap around the small child and his partner and the light is just too big and bright for her to contain from sight for a few moments.
People simply look at her and the child with confusion and she doesn't dare open her eyes until the little boy giggles with delight and the pleasant light is gone. Then she steps back and though she doesn't recognize the form that appears in place of it, she is relieved to feel the bus still moving beneath her feet and the driver is not veering off in panic.
"Thanks, Onee-chan," the little boy says before his mother can get a word in edgewise. "He was getting too shiny." He frowns and looks at Punimon, who is rolling over from having fallen on his spikes. "Has yours gotten too shiny yet?"
Noriko scoops Punimon into one arm and shakes her head. "Nah, he's lazy." Punimon protests, loudly, and the mother scowls, an expression that sends a chill down Noriko's spine. From a time when she used to look into the mirror and hate herself. However, she manages a smile at the woman. "Well, he is," she says with a laugh. "He doesn't have to pay taxes or do homework or-"
"Anything boring," her partner finishes, glaring at the mother like she's a bad stain on a futon. The woman looks affronted, but Noriko only laughs a little and bows to the little boy again.
She sits back down, and feels Miyako's eyes on the side of her head. "Didn't you stare at me enough before this?" she asks without looking up.
The girl snorts, somehow amused. "Believe me, you're not that interesting."
"And yet here you are, staring at me," Noriko shoots back. It's easy to be rude to her, or at least, in theory, it is. "Did I handle that situation wrong, then?" She sits against the cold plastic, deciding to give up on being hostile until she was back at home and able to give no cares.
Miyako shrugs. "I don't know. I'm about as good at this as you." Noriko peeks at her through her bangs, and notes the slump in the chair and the way the other girl's clothes are as messy as someone who didn't sleep the night before.
Truce, she decides with reluctance. She wasn't going to let the well-deserved stalking go, but they had both just finished high school exams. It wasn't worth it.
"Woman was piece of work."
Miyako laughs. "A lot of the adults are. And just think, we're going to be the new normal."
Noriko chortles in disbelief and Punimon scowls at Hawkmon for no particular reason.
Somehow, that thought is more disturbing than the idea of the two of them being nice to each other.
…
Their truce lasts until the arrival of their exam scores. Then it's a rivalry, one of close grades and friendships with Ken that Miyako feels a teensy bit threatened by even if she does not admit it.
For the most part, Noriko ignores the latter. For the sake of the glasses' girl leaving her alone more often, Noriko actually seeks more solace in Daisuke as the months pass. He lets her try his flavors of ramen and complains about the homework that really doesn't make sense. (It doesn't, for real!)
She also hears about his friends and about the fond way he looks back on having a childhood crush that is no longer a big deal. She envies that acceptance from him, like a silly fleeting desire can just float away from one person while another pours over it like a well-worn novel for years. It's actually kind of irritating, but she doesn't blame Daisuke for it. He lost something before he accepted Hikari as she was, and it hurts every time he hints at it, so she never asks.
She also takes great pains to ensure he never wonders why she's always asking about her. He probably notices though. He's not as stupid as people think.
The nightmares are still there, and sometimes their snarling voices want to stab Miyako in the throat when the two of them are bickering over cram school exams. But she never does because it isn't worth it to make Ken or any of the others mad at her over it.
Then, of course, Hida Iori asks her out, and all shit hits the fan.
…
She meets this moment with awkwardness and dismay.
Iori is a rough boy, a stubborn fellow that takes a long time to figure out who he is and what he wants and it's very sweet and painfully loyal. And she feels bad about saying no. She feels bad because in terms of love she's known what she's wanted for a very long time. Even before she had a name and a face to put to it, Noriko's always wanted someone with soft edges but a steel core and loyal determination that understands things without words and with them helps Noriko feel better about herself and her incompetence..
Iori has none of these qualities in a way that feels right to her and she feels sad because he defended her when she was weak and vulnerable and after everything was said and done, sometimes went to pray with her and talk about the future. It was nice back then, but it wasn't what she needed now.
Noriko tells him so, as gently as she knows how, which is too harsh for even her, but also as self-deprecating as any adolescent.
"You're a good friend," she says softly. "You are a good friend and you deserve better than what I can give you."
He doesn't cry, but Iori is not the crying type as it is. She feels his sadness and the awkward wall between her stomach and throat threatens to melt into cement and she just stands there.
"I'm sorry, Iori," Noriko tries, even though it likely doesn't mean much of anything.
Iori smiles at her during this. "So am I." He hesitates. "Are we still friends?"
Noriko looks at him aghast. "Of course we are!"
She knows it's not enough to reassure him of that and it hurts as much as the Dark Seed trying to bloom. Noriko ends up leaving in an awkward rush and spends her night so deep in books her eyes cross.
Even when Punimon tries to comfort her, Noriko has the worst chain of nightmares she has had since the age of twelve and her mother can do nothing but try to help her drink tea.
Not even Punimon's transformation into Nyaromon can stop her tears.
…
Miyako does not forgive her.
Noriko doesn't care.
The girl confronts her with a tirade loud enough to get the entire lunch room to look around and Noriko only responds with a slap that every person in the room feels.
"You're Iori-kun's friend," she says, her whole body shaking with compressed rage. "But he can defend himself. He is heartbroken, but I would rather it hurt now, than me string him along later. You know, like you keep doing to Ken-san?"
Because Miyako is popular, and she's popular for the same reason Noriko is not. She is active and loud and easy to get along with. Noriko can be just as passionate and commanding, but prefers the children below her age, prefers the people who are more capable of being taught. And that makes her more likely to slip through the cracks.
She's fine with that, just as Miyako should be fine with her place. Or at least secure it. Her words and actions are everything illogical and wrong with being a Chosen Child, though Noriko will never say so to her face without incredible provocation.
Then again, that day, she almost had.
Instead she says. "Either make a move on Ken-san, or stop bugging him. Stop projecting on Iori-kun. He's a good person, but he's not my person."
Miyako is furious, and Noriko doesn't blame her. It doesn't mean she has to like it. It doesn't mean she has to take everything the girl dishes out. They were never friends, after all.
She shouldn't feel so bad.
But she does.
Even when, three weeks later, Ken is flushing pink and fiddling with a small card while telling her about a date, Noriko's guilt doesn't ease.
It doesn't ease until Miyako beats her test score in math, and then she's ready to smash the other's face into the nearest window for being so smug.
It's never easygoing between them, but after that, she hopes things might get easier.