Politics and Love: Arizona
I'm so in love with my wife and I don't remember much about her, bits come back to me about us and it's amazing. It's hard to believe I'm not 25 and a complete dork I find myself smiling at myself in the mirror in awe that my braces are gone and my skin is clear.
"Hey what are you doing in here?" Callie asked waking into the bathroom
"I can't believe what I look like." I say
I ran my hands over the black dress I have on, It was the day of Carlos' funeral and I was hiding out in the guess bathroom of Arias Miami home. Lucia was making me feel uncomfortable.
"You look amazing and I love you." Callie says kissing the back of my neck and hugging me from behind.
"Shouldn't you be with your family?"
"I am with my family."
"That's not what I meant Calliope." I say
"I know what you mean Arizona, Ben took this time of all times to pick a fight over the fact that Papa left me all the money. Mama has long dismissed me as her child many years before I meant you because I was difficult as she says. So I am with my family in this room my amazing son and my two amazing little girls fast to sleep on the bed. And you the only other woman or soul that could love me and that I could love." Callie says in my ear.
"What if I woke up a man?" I ask smiling
"We can live in the same house even share the same soap but we will not have sex."
"But you love my soul." I say picking at her and she knows it.
"That's true I do but I am just not attracted to the male body, if you haven't noticed our strap on is the most nonrealistic sext toy ever." Callie says
"Yeah I saw that, what is that a kangaroo?"
"I think or it's a rabbit." Callie says softly
This was my dream this feeling right here in this dim bathroom away from everything dancing slowly to some unheard music, have always wanted kids and I love mine but Callie and I haven't had a lot of time to do things like this.
"We have to make time for this when we get home." I say relaxing into her arms.
"We will have as much of this as you want I'm not going to work at the Hospital full time." Callie says
"Your not?" I asked turning in her arms to look at her.
"No I'm going to be a Doctor Farmer like when I was a kid." She says matter a fact.
"You're a triple threat; you're a Lawyer Doctor and a Vet?" I asked
"And a damn good looking farmer." Callie says
"Where did you find the time?"
"I'm a smart girl"
"Callie."
"I don't know Arizona ok….I took the one thing that my mother labeled as a flaw when I was a kid and I used it."
"What's that?"
"I'm Bipolar Bipolar mania Manic Depressive whatever you want to call it it was really bad when I was young. I never slept and talked a lot and when the Doctor started to sniff around that mom became this monster about it and yes tried to beat it out of me that was her answer for it through the years to her I was the one that didn't want to do anything with my life but I was already in college when Aria got to 12 grade and I'm the baby. It was Abuela who made me take time off from school but by then I was done so she too me to a doctor and they got me on the right meds."She says in a whisper
It was almost like she didn't want her mother to hear her talking about it, like she was afraid.
"Callie you are perfect the way you are to me and I'm the only person in this world you have to worry about pleasing." I say running my nail over the arch of Callie's brow.
"So if you want to be a farmer then you can be a farmer and I will be a doctor and we will be happy. You know Angus is almost a proud dad." I say kissing her.
"I'm ready to go home." Callie says
"Then let's go home." I say looking into her eyes.
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It has been a month now since coming home from Carlos's funeral and I have been to work full time. Everything was back to 100% everything but the sexual part of me and Callie's relationship. Don't get me wrong I want her more than anything but Lucia has taken to sending me messages telling me that I'm never going to be a Torres and that Callie will wake up and leave me.
At first it didn't bother me but like all things negative it works its way into your brain and it grows. And I started to think maybe she was right, that Callie would see me for the farm girl I am and leave.
"Well look at you, aren't you sexy."
I looked up to see Callie walking up the hall, she had on dusty jeans boots and a t-shirt that hugged every inch of her.
"Callie you're a mess." I say smiling
"I know and it's awesome." She says before kissing me.
She smelt of dirt and wood shavings animals and sweat, my knees went weak and arms came out to hold me up.
"Come on I want to show you something." She says pulling me to my office.
I closed the door behind us and for the first time I saw the bag she was holding.
"I found this tractor supply store that has this guy that does metal and leather work for whatever you may need for your horse so I him make this for Angus."
I pulled out a box and opened it and pulled out a big shiny letter 'A'.
"You got him a Breastplate?" I say
"I got him a whole new tack this just goes on it as a decorative piece. I thought he would look good in black and silver, he has a show next weekend."
The smile on her face was amazing she was so happy happier then I ever seen her when it comes to work.
"Baby you look so happy."
"I am I really am Arizona." She said putting the metal 'A' on my desk and pulling me into her arms.
"I always did what people wanted me to do so much so that I thought it was what I wanted, what I loved. But when Papi told me that he was dyeing all I could think about was did he do what he dreamed of doing. I wanted to do this as a little girl but mom said I wouldn't lower myself down to playing in the dirt with animals, But I love it." She says
I put my face in her neck and breathed deep I love this woman I love her so much. Why am I letting Lucia scare me away from her?
"Have you done your hours?" I asked
"Yes last week."
I look up into her eyes
"I didn't see you around here anywhere last week." I say frowning
"That's because I stayed on the ortho floor, seeing you in this makes my blood boil." Callie growls as her eyes rake over my lab coat and scrubs.
I press my lips to hers and go for her belt just as my pager goes off.
"Damnit."
"Shhhh Go save tiny humans I have to pick up Tor and get home I left your mom with the girls." She says
"We have all the time in the world." Callie added
I watched her leave before heading down to the ER, in the short trip I thought about my own little girls. I had hoped they would have Callie's raven hair and dark eyes but they are just as blonde as I am with Callie's tan, turns out Kes has one blue eye that helps tell her apart from her sister. Carlos was the one to notice when we was taking pictures she gave him the biggest smile and he pointed it out to Callie. Now it seem like she loves to show off that blue eye by winking it at everyone and I'm not even sure she is old enough to know what she's doing.
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Callie
Arizona is going to kick my ass she's going to slap me right down to china when she sees this mess I just made in her kitchen. There is dirt everywhere and a tom cat cornered on top of her cabinets.
"Callie you're not going to hurt that poor thing are you?" Barbra asked from the other side of the room.
"No but you daughter is going to hurt me when she sees this mess." I say.
I was in the back yard trying to get the mud off my boots when a tomcat started to sneak its way up to the back porch where Thunder was sitting watching me. She let out a scream when the unfamiliar cat reached the porch and that sent everything into motion that was now going to get me killed by my sweet blonde.
"I'm home!" Arizona
"shiit…Come here kitty." I say trying to reach the Grey and white tomcat.
"Oh My God Callie Mom what happen in here?" Arizona says
I look back over my shoulder to see Arizona standing with her hands in her hair.
"Hi…"
"Calliope there is mud everywhere what are you doing?"
"He tried to get Thunder." I say
She looked up at the cat that was hissing down at me and shook her head. Walking over she pulled out a bag of cat treats and started to toss them up at the cat. After about 5 minutes he jumped down and made his way into Arizona's arms.
"Calliope clean this up." She says before walking up stairs
Barbra frowned at me and we started to clean up the mess I made, it took me an hour to get it back to where it was before going to the laundry room and stripping down to my underwear.
"Go see what's wrong with Arizona I will start dinner and look in on the girls." Barbra said
I made my way up to the master room to see why Arizona was I reached the room I found Arizona laying on the bed with the stray tomcat rapped in a towel drying his head.
"You ok?" I asked climbing onto the bed.
I was well aware that I was still in my underwear but a shower can wait as far as I'm coinsured this was more important.
"The page I got when you was with me…. It was for a 16 year old girl she she was having a manic break and they tried to control her by chaining her up. I lost my shit the first thing I thought about was this girl she is you her mother was more worried about a date then something happening to her child that she chained her up so she wouldn't get into anything while she was out."
I frown at that my mother would lock me in a windowless room whenever Papi was out of town or at work when I had manic periods. I read a lot and I have to say that is why I love books so much, but any room without windows that I can open I'm not going into.
"The best we can sum it up was at some point her mania went from productive to outright dangerous. She somehow got twisted around and the chain got wrapped around her neck and she slipped."
"Oh god…."
"No she's ok she's at the hospital I spent the rest of the day sewing her neck close. Her mania kept her alive Callie, I don't know how but it kept her alive. Her mother came home after an hour of her hanging there. Her Date saw her and called 911, she passed it off as her trying to kill herself. It wasn't until I was stitching her up did she tell me what really happen, she was trying to get free."
Arizona Cried and fell into my arms letting go of the tomcat and wrapping her arms around me.
"Where is the mother now?" I ask
"I don't know she signed the girl over to the state and left." She says
I look at the clock then back at the top of Arizona's blonde head.
"I'm sorry about yelling at you when I came in, I was so upset and that woman she made me so mad. Told me when I have to deal with manic episodes what seems like daily I would feel the same way. Then I got mad at you for not telling, me they aren't sure what causes it but there seems to be a chance that the girls can be bipolar. They are your eggs…Then I got really pissed off that I thought that I let her infect me I let her put doubt in my head." Arizona says. "Then I walked in and I thought you was having a manic moment and I got pissed, I didn't think I just saw the mess. Then I felt really bad because you pointed out Thomas."
"Arizona you are right I should have told you that I'm Bipolar and I was well aware that it seems to be hereditary, and I am sorry. I have been so ashamed of it that I never speak of it, and I should open my mouth and talk about it more people will not be ashamed like I have been. People that grow up in a class that I grew up in they are obsessed with perfection so getting help for things isn't talked about. Admitting there is something wrong isn't perfection. And your right the girls could be Bipolar or they may not be we won't know just like we didn't know Kes was going to have your blue eye." I say kissing her head.
I pulled her head back so she could look me in the eyes.
" And you have been through my manic moments, in fact last week I was manic all week but I'm on the right medications that help me control it and I see my therapist once a month. If the girls should be bipolar then we will get them the proper help." I say
"Wait Thomas?" I ask
"The cat… You know like Thomas from Tom and Jerry." Arizona says softly.
I started to laugh making Arizona started to giggle into my neck.
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Arizona
When I did my rounds it was quiet and when I went to my office it was quiet and when I went for coffee it was quiet. That was strange for this Hospital in the middle of the day, pulling out a five I handed it over before making a slow walk around the hospital. I couldn't help but think about what Callie and I talked about; she really had a crap life. Aria was the perfect child in her mother's eyes but she lived just like her younger sister.
Callie worked so hard to keep her imperfections hidden from the world that she forgot that I wasn't part of the world, I am her wife and keeping things hidden from me isn't going to work. Also not having sex isn't going to work.
"Grrrrrrr."
"whats that about?"
I turned to see Mark walking up.
"Nothing… Where have you been?"
"I've been around." He looked at me and smiled
I didn't like how he is looking at me, which was a look that told me he was up to no good. I gave a sigh and started to move on down the hall.
"Why the sigh?" He asked
"Mark I don't know how many times I have told you that I wasn't one for your little game of whatever you play. That hasn't changed in all the years I have known you its not going to change now." I say
"I was just offering to help you out you know, the hospital has many on call rooms and no one will know."
"Are you drunk? What the hell is wrong with you?" I asked
When he reached me I did in fact smell bourbon all over him.
"Oh god you smell horrible, you need to go home Mark." I say pushing him back.
"Stop it." He says grabbing my arm.
I froze in fear this wasn't going to happen again, and when I realized it looked like it was I started to fight back. Mark had a tight grip and it hurt the more I pulled.
"Mark no Stop let go!" I yelled
Where the hell was everyone? My body started to give out of fear. I felt my shit rip and he grabbed at my scrub bottoms. And like that he was gone and I fell to the floor.
"Kayla?"
I tried to pull myself up but my legs were too weak.
"Arizona!"
My eyes were locked on Kayla rolling around on the floor with Mark, the sound of people running down the hall.
"Oh my god Arizona."
Callie pulled me into her arms.
"He he tried he tried….."
"I'm so sorry Baby baby look at me." She said and I turned to look at her.
I felt naked and weak.
"I can't feel my legs." I say
Callie picked me up and held me to her chest and moved us down the hall I watched as two Doctors pulled Kayla off a bloody Mark. We busted into an exam room and she sat me on the bed, I watched her move around the room getting things together.
"He didn't he tried but he didn't." I say
"Your bleeding." She said sitting in front of me
"I don't know what happen he just showed up." I say.
I felt her cleaning the blood off my face before she started to stitch up my brow.
"He smelt like bourbon I tried pushing him away."
"I know this isn't your fault."
Callie was dressed in her scrubs with a scrub cap on .
"You had surgery?" I asked
"I just got out; I wanted to talk to Kayla so we went on a walk." Callie said as she worked.
I started to cry but I didn't know it until she took my face in her hands.
"Arizona this isn't your fault at all, I don't know what happened with Mark maybe he has a drinking issue, But it's not your fault." She says kissing my nose.
"If you two haven't shown up it would have happen again…"
"No don't think about that Arizona it didn't happen and it will not happen." She says looking me in the eyes.
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Callie
I had to take Arizona home after she told the cops what happen, after she took a sleeping pill I left with Daniel to have a talk with Mark we found him at a bar looking into a glass of bourbon. I grabbed him off the stool and pulled him off and down the hall to the mens room.
"Hey get out of here Lady." A man says
"You get the fuck out!" I bark at the man and he goes running off.
Daniel locks the door after him.
"Get off me!" Mark yells
I push him back into the stall and again when he tried to stand up.
"Who the fuck do you think you are?" he asks
"I'm the person that is going to make your life hell for the next minute." I say grabbing him and shoving him through the door of the stall.
"When you invade a person's space and try to make them do things they do want to do, things happen. When you do those things to my wife or anyone in my family I happen." I say.
Kicking him in the back of the knee I force him down to his knees.
"I think you need to freshen up."
I shoved his face into the toilet I felt him try to push back, but when you break bones and fight animals that weigh as much as cars you get pretty strong. I pulled his head back.
"See I liked you a lot, I thought you was a good guy. A little much on the sex, but I'm the same way."
I dunked his face into the toilet again and briefly wondered where Daniel was before pulling it out again.
"I'm Sorry!" Mark coughed.
"Oh I know you're sorry."
I gave him a quick dunk before pulling him back.
"This is just a warning Mark Sloan stay the fuck away from my wife, in fact to be on the safe side you should move. Because if I see you anywhere near her this will look tame compared to the things I will do to you." I say Pulling him up onto his feet.
I turned and walked away my hand was on the lock when I heard skin on skin. I turned around to see Daniel standing over Mark who was holding his eye.
"That's as nice as I can be about the topic." He said.
We walked out the bar as if nothing happened and made our way over to Daniels truck.
"You really love my daughter don't you?" he said breaking the silence.
"I'm sorry what?" I asked I was lost outside the window.
"You really love Arizona."
"I love Arizona more than I thought I could love anyone Daniel. For a long time I thought that this woman was just part of my imagination something my abuela put in my head as a teen. But when I moved here She was the first woman hell the first person I meant, and I remember there she is. There is this beautiful amazing woman that I am meant to be with for the rest of my life. Then she ran into the grocery cart pickup and flashed me those beautiful blues and dimples that I knew I would kill to wake up to every morning."
I smiled at the memory of seeing Arizona for the first time.
"I would willingly go to hell and fight the Devil himself for Arizona and my kids." I say
"I thought for a long time that you was just using her."
I looked over at him like he was crazy.
"I did,I thought here is my baby she somehow found herself in the sights of one of those rich and powerful women that only want to use here for whatever reason. But I never said anything because I know Arizona she will push me away if she feels like I'm trying to butt into her relationship. So I was going to be there because I was dead set on just knowing you was going to leave her. But as time passed I saw that she was so in love and it scared me, but then I came here and I saw and felt how much you love her and tonight just showed me that there isn't anything you wouldn't do for my daughter. It got a little scary back there when you pushed his head down in the toilet and put your knee in the back of his neck. I thought for sure you was going to kill him and I was going to have to tell Arizona you was in jail because you killed her attacker." He says with a smile
I was about to say he was right when lights came speeding up on the back of the truck.
"What the hell is with this person? Its too dark and wet out for them to be driving like that." Daniel says
We were coming up on a curve that both Arizona and I hated so we always took the other road, it add five extra minutes but it was better that going around that hair pin turn.
"He's going around good." Daniel said when it looked like the car was going to pass.
But my gut told me otherwise.
"Daniel stop."
"What he's going around."
"Stop Daniel stop the truck stop stop stop!" I yelled
But it was much too late and the other bigger truck sideswiped us twice sending us over the side of the mountain and a down into the woods. The sound of crushing metal and glass was all I could hear it was almost like we was tumbling forever before we ever came to a stop
TBC: NEXT PART TO THIS STORY WILL BE POSTED SOON.