Chapter 5 - Diggle

AN – First, I do need to add the additional warning (which I've been very remiss in sharing) that Olicity is the happy ending for me so if that isn't your thing then stop now as I'm trying desperately to work through the angst and find the fun! Still advising you read with caution for that happy ending although this is Diggle's POV and who doesn't love a little Diggle wisdom and insight?! And a special thanks to my beta (Mic Riddy) who I pestered endlessly about this and upcoming chapters! :)

AN2 – Also, just want to say that the episode itself and the potential aftermath clearly evoke a lot of strong emotions from us as fans (which is really a good thing even if we don't agree). Pls remember this is just my take on it, my personal therapy, and my attempt at resolution!

DISCLAIMER – Nope, I refuse to claim this mess…current angst is all on CW as they own Arrow!

Diggle was surprised to find peace and quiet in the lair this morning. With Felicity unusually quiet on the rare times she was actually here, Oliver tense and on edge, and both Roy and Sara testing the boundaries to exert their own authority and find their place, the lair wasn't the home it once was. Diggle didn't oppose changes to the Team and knew it was inevitable but this was more of a chaotic eruption than a planned development. Additionally, the Team's foundation was shaky as Felicity avoided Oliver and he was, well, Oliver so he was dark and brooding. Previously the tension between the pair was more amusing than anything but now it was reaching unbearable heights and rippling out to the others. Roy and Sara may not have a firm grasp of the previous Team environment but even they felt the tension and their own short tempers exploded more frequently as well. No one had been killed yet and on Team Arrow that was always a good day - but Diggle wasn't sure how much longer they could continue on the current course.

The door signaled Oliver's arrival but Diggle just continued his workout until the other man was within hearing distance. "You're late."

Diggle neither expected nor received a response but he still stop to look at Oliver when he joined him on the mats. He was surprised to see an improvement in his condition considering his consistent decline over the past week or so. Since Moira's betrayal came to light and Felicity left for several days, Oliver's mood had gotten progressively worse and now he resembled more of a zombie – ploughing forward doggedly with little hope and no rest. This morning though it actually looked like Oliver had slept and was actually rested. Diggle noted his eyes were clearer, the dark circles less evident and there was also just a little less tension in his shoulders. Diggle felt a spark of hope himself that maybe they could all move forward now. He hoped the stalemate with Felicity was over but needed to reserve judgment though until he had spoken to Felicity.

Speaking to Felicity was easier said than done as she continued her ghost routine and wasn't in the lair. He had cornered her briefly at QC but she remained uncharacteristically closed mouth about everything. She hadn't even filled him in on the Sara development but it hadn't been difficult to put those pieces together. Oliver hadn't denied his conclusions about 'that night' but he wouldn't clarify anything either. Diggle hadn't asked outright what was going on either, but he continued to check-in with both whenever possible and gave them every opportunity to talk if they wanted to do so. Neither had accepted that offer which remained more unusual for Felicity than Oliver.

Diggle had started watching her more closely and it was easy to see she was struggling with her feelings about Oliver. Her nearly completely silent withdrawal from Oliver spoke volumes about Felicity's turmoil. Felicity's lack of a brain to mouth filter wasn't the only example of her unreserved nature – Felicity's thoughts and feeling were evident in her unguarded actions as well. She had always touched easily in affection and always given frequent hugs which both he and Oliver had learned to accept early on (Diggle also knew Oliver had come to depend upon those touches even if he wouldn't admit to it). Felicity simply lacked that tough outer shell that he and Oliver and even Roy and Sara had. That was just one of the reasons he and Oliver agreed early on to protect her and keep her safe – not just physically but emotionally as well. It was rough to watch her develop that protective shell now even if Diggle knew she needed it to continue their work and Felicity seemed determined to continue.

Oliver, on the other hand, had a rock solid protective shell firmly in place, so much so that Diggle and Felicity had previously worried that he would become just that shell of a person. Both of them had always pushed him to be more but it was Felicity who pulled the emotions from him. She made him smile, laugh, and even yell in anger sometimes. Without her, Oliver had withdrawn as well and not even arguing with Sara and Roy brought forth the same depth of emotions. Diggle wasn't sure how to reach Oliver right now but he also didn't think it was time to step in just yet either (as Moira had learned, it simply wasn't smart to try and get between Oliver and Felicity).

Remembering a past conversation with Oliver, Diggle thought Felicity was or would be the right fit for Oliver when he was ready. It was easy to see Oliver wasn't ready right now but Diggle wasn't sure if anyone (including Oliver) realized just how far he had come and just how badly he wanted to be ready. Felicity wasn't the only one saddened by the current state of relations on the Team and the Oliver of a year ago would have been untouched by it all instead of hurting as well. Diggle knew Felicity and Oliver saw a future together or at least couldn't imagine a future without the other. Actually all three of them were in this together for the long haul – Diggle saw Oliver as a brother and Felicity as a sister. They were family as, even if Oliver's and Felicity's feelings weren't as innocently familial, they were committed to one another.

Roy's arrival had already upset the balance of the Team but Sara and Moira together toppled it completely. It seemed neither Oliver nor Felicity could find their footing alone and yet they also couldn't work together right now. They were both just existing, surviving and it had been increasingly difficult to stand by and watch their struggles even if Diggle knew this was their path alone. Outside factors may have unsettled them and brought up underlying issues but their relationship was their own and they had to be the ones to fix it.

At that moment, Felicity entered the lair and Diggle knew he wasn't the only one surprised by the sight as Oliver actually stood up to stare at her. For the first time since 'that night' Diggle saw Felicity meet Oliver's eyes. There was a moment of silence as the pair simply stared at one another before Felicity gave a single affirmative nod. Felicity hadn't smiled but Oliver seemed pleased by her action and did actually smile. Diggle continued to watch as Felicity took her rightful place at her computer and Oliver moved to his customary location behind her as she worked.

Diggle took a deep breath and released it as a soft sigh. While it appeared the Team's foundation had been shaken it no longer seemed to be cracked beyond repair. It seemed they would all have a few more scars but it was possible for them to move forward together anyway.

"How about take-out from Big Belly Burger? It's on me." Diggle announced with a smile of his own.

AN3 – Yes, this is the morning after Of Friends and Dreams but don't worry I plan to go back and get Felicity's and Oliver's POVs and I plan to explain what is behind Felicity's nod. Pls just stick with me a little longer!