04
Los Angeles, California
(Redondo Beach)
"And then, move your fingers here," Kendall said as he leaned over to adjust Rhuben's fingers on the neck of the guitar in her lap. She pressed her pinky into the high E string; the string on the very bottom of the guitar. She pressed her middle finger to the low E on the third fret and her first finger on the A string on the second fret. "Ok, strum and you'll be playing the G chord."
Rhuben did as she was told, grimacing when a low clunking sound came out of the guitar. She looked up at Kendall, who was sitting across from her on the beach towel, shielding her face from the bright sun. He lifted his acoustic guitar, placing his hands on the guitar, strumming out the chord before looking back at her, pursing his lips for a moment before frowning.
"You have smaller hands than I thought," he said to her, and Rhuben rolled her eyes. "I told you chords would be hard. Have you been practicing?"
"Of course not," Rhuben replied, giving him a pointed look. She had said it so naturally, so straightforward that he couldn't help but laugh. "I'm never going to get this, Kenny."
"No one said it was going to be easy," Kendall said, setting his guitar aside, making sure he didn't get any sand in the hole. He stretched out his long legs, resting them on either side of her knees, curling his toes until they popped. He leaned back against his hands, before using his shoulder to adjust the sunglasses perched on his nose. "But, you didn't have the best introduction to the instrument. Trust me, once you get it, you'll be happy you know how to play."
They were all spending the day (the real day of Riley and Rhuben's birthday) at Redondo Beach. Normally, the group would spend the day at Santa Monica, but decided to make a change and take the almost hour drive (due to traffic) down to the beach for a day of surf, sand, and fun.
"For real this time, you mean," Rhuben pointed out to him with a twitch of her eyebrow. Kendall chuckled, nodding his head. She had faked playing the guitar for years as part of her ex-father's request. Or rather, command.
She used to trade off playing the drums and singing as part of her band, until Robert had thought it'd be better to have the two girls in the group front the band on guitars. Only problem was Rhuben didn't know how to play the guitar so she faked it during shows. It wasn't that unheard of; with a lot of new bands for their first live performances, they played along to pre-recorded music, but sang for real.
After returning from Australia where she and her family spent the summer working on their music back home, Big Time Rush had finished the rest of their first tour with Dak Zevon. It was shortly after that, that Kendall had called her out on not knowing how to play the guitar. She could see that he took playing very seriously so she wasn't too surprised for him to take it personally in a way.
It wasn't too much of a problem then as they were shifting their music to more of a pop/rock feel focusing more on their dancing then their instrumental techniques. It wasn't until just last year, when the Jacksons had decided to take a year off from making music where Kendall offered to teach her how to play. He had been giving her lessons without fail ever since.
"You've been doing a great job, Benny, don't worry," Kendall said, reaching out to pat her knee. "Especially here. I know you've been dying to hit the waves."
Rhuben laughed a little bit. She couldn't deny it, but it wasn't the only thing that was on her mind. Ace's words had been set on repeat ever since she saw him the day before at the fair. If anyone were to know about Logan, Big Time Rush would, but they were normal. Whatever normal was for them.
Carlos was sitting in the sand with Katie, building a sandcastles, waiting anxiously for the time for them to be allowed to knock them over as they played Godzilla or whatever it was that encompassed dinosaur –like sound. Riley, Patrick, Noah, Sydney, James, and Logan were out on the water, bobbing up and down as they waited for the waves to roll in. Everybody was having a good time. But, she wondered how Logan could be that carefree knowing that kind of news.
"Go on," Kendall said to her, gently nudging her side with his foot. "You've been staring at the waves since we got here, Benny. It's fine, we'll finish our lesson later."
"Sure 'bout that, mate?" Rhuben asked, holding the guitar out towards him.
"Sure I'm sure," Kendall replied, pushing the guitar back towards her. "But, that's not mine." Rhuben gave him a confused look and he motioned for her to flip it upside down. A smile blossomed across her face as soon as she did so. Written in silver sharpie was ,"Happy 19th" followed by the four boys' signatures. "If you're going to learn to play, you'll have to own one of your own."
"Thanks, Kenny," Rhuben said with a grin as she carefully set the guitar aside. "That's perfect for firewood."
"Don't even joke about that," Kendall said in a warning tone, pointing a finger in her face. Rhuben slapped his hand away. "Seriously; I want you to learn how to play."
"Something tells me with you as my friend, I won't have a choice," Rhuben replied as she rolled to her side to grab her surfboard case. She reached into the pocket for board wax and quickly applied it to her purple and white surfboard. She attached the leash around her leg before tucking her board under her arm. "You coming in?"
"I'll stay here for a little bit," Kendall replied, reaching for his own guitar.
"Suit yourself, mate," Rhuben replied with a shrug. "Cheers." And then she took off across the warm sand, her feet sinking into the grain just slightly before splashing through the water. She wasn't as passionate about surfing as Riley and Patrick were. In fact, the two of them had both said if they weren't in the band they'd probably be actively pursuing professional careers in the sport.
"Bout time," Patrick said as Rhuben reached them. He was lounging on his stomach on his board, swirling a hand in the water. "Waves are perfect." He then swiped his hand in the water, sending a small wave over to Sydney who was sitting on the front end of Noah's board.
"Hey!" Sydney said, shielding his face with his arm. Noah silently swung his leg through the water, pushing on Patrick's board, tipping it over. Sydney stuck his tongue out at Patrick as he surfaced.
"Next wave's coming," Riley announced, pushing herself up to a sitting position. "Logan, it's your turn."
"James can take it," Logan said, nodding over towards James who was laughing as he watched the exchange between the Jacksons boys. "I wanted to talk to Rhubes for a minute."
"Suit yourself," Riley replied with a shrug before giving him a half smile. "Trust me, mate, you could use the practice."
"Ha, ha," Logan replied, turning his head to roll his eyes in her direction. He then gave Rhuben a questioning look and she gave a brief nod of her head.
"Hey, Little Man," Rhuben said, turning her board to face Noah and Sydney. Sydney smiled over at her. Noah turned his board, pointing in their direction until he was floating a little bit ways away from them. "Wanna bang some out yourself?" She slapped her hand down onto the top of her board. "Save yourself a trip going back in for your stick."
"Yeah," Sydney said with a grin, sliding off of Noah's board and into the water. He swam over to Rhuben's board and she lifted him up onto her board before removing the leash from around her ankle, attaching it to his. "Thanks, Rhu-Rhu."
"No pro," Rhuben replied, bumping his fist with her own before sliding off of her board and into the water before lifting herself up onto Logan's board. Logan sat back on his heels before digging his hands into the water, paddling them around her brothers. Rhuben pulled her knees to her chest as he did so. "So what was so important that you needed to talk to me about?"
"Well, I happened to notice that I never got a birthday gift from you," Logan said to her and Rhuben stuck her hand in the water, swinging it up to splash him in the face.
"You hoon, that was what was so important to you?" she asked with a short laugh. She watched as Logan twisted his mouth to the side, as he stopped paddling. He shifted his sitting position so he had one leg tucked underneath him, pulling his knee up to his chest.
"Considering I already know what it is," he replied, "and I know how hard it is for you to do it…"
Rhuben gave a slight nod of her head. This year, for the boys' birthday she was doing something really special for them. During her therapy sessions she had been encouraged by her psychiatrist, Dr. Angelo, to let people know how much she cared for and appreciated them. In her journals, she had done an exercise where she had to write about what it was that she thought about people the first time she met them, and then how she felt about them years later.
Starting with Carlos's birthday in August, and then James's birthday earlier that month, she had been giving them those portions of her journal. She planned on doing the same for Logan, and Kendall, and the rest of her friends. It was just a little harder to do with Logan.
They had been through so much, and they had a longer history than her other friends. She wasn't just writing about when she was sixteen. She was writing about when she was nine, when things had really been a dark time for her. It was shocking to see how deep down in the dumps she was in comparison to how happy and cheerful and comfortable she was now.
"No, really, I just wanted to tell you that, there's no rush with it," Logan said. He glanced down at the black star on his left hand, tattooed between his fore finger and thumb, running his fingers over it. Rhuben glanced down at her purple star before looking back up at him. "I get how hard it can be to expose that part of you."
"I knew you would," Rhuben said to him and they shared a smile. "I'll get it to you. I promise."
"No rush," Logan replied, putting a hand up into the air, turning his head slightly to the side. "I wanted to see what was up. You seemed out of it today."
"Just a lot on my mind," Rhuben said.
Silence fell over the two of them as the rushing water, pushed them closer and closer to shore. She looked over at him and saw that he was silently staring back at her.
"Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?" Logan suddenly asked her.
Rhuben's eyebrows shot up before coming together slightly in a curious look. "I do and I don't," she slowly replied as if choosing her words carefully. She moved to sit Indian style on the board as it bobbed up and down in the water. She reached her hand up to adjust the purple flower hair clip in her hair.
"I believe that each action you take is already predetermined for you, but at the same time, you're still the one making the decisions," she continued. "You're the one who's there in that moment. I mean, sure you could have a path carved out of you, but who's to say you have to stay on it?" She gave him a curious look."Why?"
"Just curious," Logan replied, his eyes on her fingers, watching as she adjusted the flower.
Liar. She pressed her lips together, having to stop herself from asking him the one question she knew he'd avoid answering.
She could see it in his stature; his back was arched as he leaned towards her, leg pulled up to his chest, not looking her in the eyes. She could recognize those signs from a mile away, she had only done them so many times in her life, trying to push him away. Just tell me what's wrong. I want to hear it from you. What's going on inside that Big Time Brain of yours?
"It's a kanzashi," she explained, motioning towards the flower. She pulled it out of her hair to show the short metal rod connecting to the flower before sliding it back into her hair. "Normally, in Japan, geishas or brides wear them, but young women are using them more to bring a classier looks to their outfits. Mom used to put these in Riles and my hair a lot; for Christmas, birthdays, New Year's, any special occasion she thought was worth wearing them."
"Riles mainly wears hers to awards shows, and parties and stuff. Being the fashiony one of our band, I'm not surprised, and it really works well with her outfits. I wear mine out here." She spread out her arms, indicating the ocean. "Dad loved being out in the water, and mom loved her garden. It's a way to show both of them that I'm thinking of them."
Logan slowly nodded his head, a half smile on his face. He had always enjoyed hearing more about her family, knowing that she was finally in a good place to divulge in more details. It was something she wanted to hold to herself; kind of like a secret. Something she could think back to whenever she wanted; whenever things were hard. It was a reminder that things used to be great and could one day be that way again.
Come on. Tell me what's on your mind, Rhuben thought to herself as she adjusted her side ponytail, securing her hair comb. "I see my parent sometimes," she said and Logan blinked in surprise, eyes widening for a brief moment. "They watch over me when I sleep, sometimes. They just stand by and watch and smile. They used to do that when I was a kid."
"Yeah, mine too," Logan replied, his half smile widening slightly. He ran his fingers over the tattoo on his hand for a second time. "Maybe we got these to soon."
"Logan—"
"I gave Riles her necklace."
"I saw; it's so beautiful," Rhuben replied.
Logan had given her a metal heart shaped necklace with the top left arc of the heart covered in diamonds. There was a red gem in the center, also in a heart shaped, the lower most part of the curve of the bigger metal heart, and another swirl arching towards the left side of the red heart was also covered in diamonds.
"Things'll come good between the two of you," Rhuben said t him. Logan nodded his head, peering out over at the waves and Rhuben followed his gaze; instantly spotting the red dot that was her sister carving a wave. "It'll just take time. You have an advantage anyway." Logan gave her a questioning look and Rhuben shrugged. "She loves hockey players."
"I guess I just didn't realize how much she was hurting?" Logan said as more of a question as he scratched the back of his neck. "I didn't want things to turn out like this. I was just trying to help. I mean, you didn't have a problem with it."
"Well, it's like Riles said, she didn't like being thought of as a statistic, or like anybody else that went through what we went through," Rhuben explained to him, sliding her feet into the water, slowly kicking her legs back and forth.
"She wanted to move on from it in a different way than I did, in a different way than Noah, or Pat, or Syd did. With me, it helped to know that what I was going through wasn't weird or out there, but she never liked being compared to other people because it's what we've always been through. Kendall was able to do that for her, that's why they're so close, that's all."
Logan closed his eyes, letting out a heavy sigh through his nose before removing the hat on his head. He dipped his hat into the water and quickly put it back onto his head. "I want you two to be friends again," she said, rapping her knuckles on the top of the surfboard. Logan chuckled when he heard the slightly whine in her voice.
"I still care about her, you know that," Logan said to her, squeezing an eye shut against the sun. Rhuben nodded her head. "I still care about you, too."
"I know," Rhuben replied, shifting her gaze out towards the incoming waves. "I care about you, too, Logie-Bear." She laughed, swinging her legs out of the water, splashing him in the face when he winced at the nickname. Her laughter then quickly turned into a shriek when he crouched forward on the board starting to splash her back. "You're going to pay for that."
She used her arms to try and shield herself from the water, but Logan kept splashing the water at her, laughing as he did so. She flailed her legs, blindly trying to splash him back. Her abs ached from her deep belly laughs in between gasps for air.
"Logan!" Rhuben laughed when she felt him wrap a hand around her ankle, pulling her closer towards him, using his free hand to continue to splash her. "Stop!"
She fell onto her back before dropping her arm into the water, swinging it up to splash him back. Logan grabbed her wrist, stopping her, reaching for her other hand, holding her wrists together. Rhuben's laughter subsided as she was pulled even clover towards him. Logan's laughter slowly faded, keeping the smile n his face. Rhuben bowed her head, feeling her cheeks heat up as he gently brushed his fingers across her cheek, tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear.
Rhuben then shot out her free hand, shoving his chest while at the same time, shifting her weight, to the right, causing Logan to lose his balance. "Whoa!" Logan cried seconds before he hit the water. Rhuben gave him a bright smile as he resurfaced, brushing the water from his face. "Here's a tip; having grown up with four brothers, never assume a fight is over."
"Oh really?" Logan asked, his eyebrows shooting up as he flailed his arms and legs, reading water. Rhuben just shrugged. "Well, then you should take your own advice because there's an 100% chance that this fight isn't over." He then grabbed the edge of the surfboard and pushed upwards as hard as he could.
Rhuben's world pitched as she rolled backwards into the water. She arched her back, swimming downwards for a moment before swimming back up. She broke the surface, shaking her head back and forth to clear the water from her face before reaching for the surfboard, resting her arms on it. Logan was already leaning on the other side, giving her an amused smile.
"I grew up with three brothers," Logan replied. Rhuben gave him a confused look before relaxing into a smile, aware of his toes lightly grazing her calf as they treaded water.
"Brrrrr." Rhuben shivered as a gentle breeze blew as the sun set across the horizon. "It's getting cold."
"Today was so worth it," Carlos said, from where he was lying in the sand, making a sand angel. He sighed happily, folding his arms onto his stomach. "Someone carry me home."
"Oh, get up," Kendall said, gently kicking Carlos in the side as he gathered his belongings. "Come on, Carlos, quit being a baby."
"I am not being a baby," Carlos protested, crossing his arms over his chest before sticking out his bottom lip.
"I'll get him," Katie laughed before kneeling down by her friend's side. She cupped a hand around his ear and whispered something into it. Carlos's eyes popped open and a wide smile came across his face as he sat up. He jumped to his feet before happily humming to himself, moving to pack up his bags. "How was that?"
"I don't think I even want to know what you said to him, Katie," Kendall replied, shaking his head.
"I told him that the Riles and Rhubes got a fire pit for their birthday and he wouldn't get any s'mores if he didn't get up," Katie replied with a grin. Kendall gave her an amused look.
"They never said that," he pointed out to her.
"Looks like we don't have a choice," Riley joked, shooting Stephanie a mock annoyed look as she zipped her surfboard carrying case shut. She then stuck two fingers in her mouth and let out a shrill whistle. "Alright, mates, listen up; thanks to Katie here—" She jerked her thumb in Katie's direction who just gave a bright smile, "—it looks like we'll be having s'mores at our place. Pack up the cars and let's get going."
"Thanks, Katie," Rhuben laughed, reaching into her bag for her flip flops. "Now we're going to have to deal with a hyper Carlos for the rest of the night." She set her shoes down onto the
"Happy to help," Katie replied with a wink.
Rhuben chuckled, reaching out a hand to muss her hair before shouldering her bag. "Sis, I'll drive back," she said to her sister, holding out her hand for the car keys. Riley dug into her bag and threw them to her. "I'm not taking my chances with you driving in traffic."
"Well, if you want to take three hours to get home, sis, be my guest," Riley replied with a smirk as she reached into her bag for her phone. "I'll warn Ronan; let him know that we're bringing the cavalry."
"Y'hear that?" Patrick asked with a grin. "You blokes have become a step up from the boys. Now, Riles, when are you going to stop from calling me a kid."
"Probably when you stop acting like one," Sydney replied with a cheeky smile as he walked past his brother, sticking out his tongue as he did so. "I call shotgun!" He then took off across the sand with Patrick chasing after him.
"I'll take your board," Noah offered, stepping up beside Rhuben.
"Feel free to smack 'em with it if they're still fighting when you get up there," Riley said deadpan and Noah laughed before giving Riley a two-fingered salute.
Logan bumped Rhuben's elbow with his own as he stepped up beside her. "Here," Logan said, reaching into his backpack. Rhuben rubbed at her arms, watching as Logan pulled out the maroon and gold sleeve of his hockey jersey. He tugged on the sleeve, shaking it, before pulling it out handing it to her.
"Thanks," Rhuben replied as she unraveled the ball of material before sliding it over her head. The jersey dropped down past her waist, and the shirt sleeves fell over her hands. She pushed the sleeves up to her elbows over and over again. "I'll, uh, put it in the wash as soon as we get home."
"No worries," Logan replied with a shrug as he straightened his belongings in his backpack. He turned his head and gave her his dimpled smile. "Keep it. Really." He zipped up his backpack and slid his arms through the straps, adjusting it on his back before making his way towards the sand covered wooden steps, heading to the Big Time Rush, mobile.
"Well, that's interesting," James said as he fell into step beside Rhuben, reaching for her towel, starting to gently shake it out.
Rhuben sniffed, turning her gaze towards him, hiking an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. James peered back at her as he folded the towel, as if he was waiting for her to say something. He gave her a peaceful smile before he started to whistle. She briefly closed her eyes, laughing lightly, realizing that he wanted her to ask what he meant.
"Alright, I'll bite," she said, tilting her head back, to peer up at the clouds as the sky slowly turned into a peach color as the sun set. "What?"
"Nothing," James replied with a smile and a shrug. Rhuben crossed her arms over her chest, giving him a look of disbelief. His smile faded slightly and his eyebrows twitched. "It's just…Logan hasn't given anybody his jersey before." He nodded in the direction that Logan stood in moments before. "Not even Camille during their on/off thing." Rhuben cringed slightly.
She and Camille Roberts were still good, close friends despite the two of them liking and at one point dating the same guy. At the time, Rhuben could see how hard it was for Camille to see the two of them dating, and she didn't want to lose Camille's friendship.
But she was, in a way, part of the reason why Camille and Logan broke up anyway. Logan had been researching as much about the psychological effects of child abuse as often as he could to make sure that he could be there for his friends and to help them realize that there was someone who understood what they were going through, and that they weren't alone. Without realizing it, he wanted to help them so much, that he had been paying less and less attention to Camille. When James had offered to help her run lines for an audition, before she knew it, she was kissing him.
Logan had forgiven both of them for it, but had decided that it would be best if he and Camille didn't go out anymore. A couple of months later, he had managed to break down Rhuben's walls enough for her to let him in and the two of them started dating.
"It's kind of a big deal, Beautiful. So, are you two going to get back together, or…?" James asked as he moved to stand behind her, unzipping her backpack to put the beach towel inside. "You seemed to enjoy each other's company today. You two talked about it a little while ago, right?"
"Yeah, but…yeah," she lamely replied, raking her fingers through her hair. They then started making their way towards the car park. "You see how that worked out. It was my fault though, I just kind of…stopped the conversation.".
James made a noise in the back of his throat as they made their way up the stairs. "Really?" he asked, his eyebrows inching up his forehead.
Rhuben nodded, letting out a heavy sigh. "I broke up with him the first time because…Logan was great," she explained. James gave her a confused look. "He knew how I was feeling, how to talk me down from the edge, he was just there. I'm so used to be a self-relying person; I've always had to do things for myself, it's what was easy."
"But not as easy as relying on someone who shows you that they'll do anything you need no questions asked. I took advantage of my relationship with Logan; I was being a jerk and I recognize that. I could see that it was putting a whole bunch of pressure on him. Adding that in with Gustavo needing your second album to be even better than the first—"
"Which it was," James said with an easy going smile, buffing his finger nails on his bare chest.
"I'm not denying that," Rhuben replied, shoving his shoulder. James stumbled a few steps to the side before jogging back over to her side. Rhuben pushed the shirt sleeves back up her arms. "After a while, I just expected him to be there whenever I need him , and that wasn't fair to him. I have trust issues, as you know."
"Mmhmm," James agreed, slowly nodding his head.
"I'm just not used to having people stay when they say they're going to stay," Rhuben continued her explanation. She started up the wooden steps, stepping lightly, making sure that she didn't get a splinter. "I'm always waiting for that one moment, but it didn't come. So, I pushed him away." She let out a small laugh. "You'd think Ronan would've been proof of that by now, but even then, I'm always worried that he'll change his mind."
"You know there's no one else in the world," James said, a serious tone creeping into his voice, "Apart from maybe his mom and Nana, and us, that Logan cares about more than you and your family. You know that."
"I do know that," Rhuben agreed. "I just hated how I was making him put his life on hold just to help me. If I'm going to be in a relationship with someone, I want it to be a partnership thing and I recognized that I was relying too much on him, and that he was putting off his dream and I don't want him to do that. I wanted to be able to help myself. Not that I didn't appreciate that he wanted to do anything he could to help, because I did. He respected my wishes and took everything slow but…ugh, I'm just not great with relationships."
"Oh, I don't know, you could have a good game of doctor going," James said with a shrug and a cheeky smile.
"You're sick." Rhuben shoved his shoulder a second time, but this time he didn't even move. He laughed when he saw the look of surprise on her face.
"I just want to make sure that no one gets hurt," he explained, adjusting the straps to his backpack. He gripped the straps with his fist before splaying his fingers, keeping his thumbs hooked. It was as if he was putting his hands up defensively.
"That's sweet, but I don't even know what's going to happen," Rhuben said, looping her arm through James's, trying to keep up with his long steps.
"It's not you I'm worried about, to be honest. Not entirely," James replied. His eyes widened and this time he did put his hands up defensively. "No offense, Beautiful, but if things are going to happen between the two of you, you better be absolutely sure you want to do this, that you want to go through with it this time. I told him the exact same thing a couple days ago."
"When Logan decided to have a guy's night for his birthday, you talked about our relationship?" Rhuben asked, giving James an odd look. He opened and closed his mouth for a moment before looking her up and down, taking a small step away from her as if expecting her to hit him. Not that she hadn't been thinking about it.
"Not just that," he slowly replied as they came to the top of the wooden stairs, heading through the car park to their respective cars. He gave a shrug. "The subject was just brought up again, that's all."
"And you're worried I'm going to break his heart," Rhuben supplied.
"I'm worried about you both," James corrected her. His chest swelled as he sucked in a breath of air. "I just don't think that a relationship would be a good thing for him right now, considering…" He trailed off, eyes widened before slapping a hand across his mouth.
Does he know? Rhuben peered up at him, her eyebrows knitting together. "Considering what, Handsome?" she asked him.
"Nothing," James replied, pulling the corners of his lips down, shaking his head. "Forget I said anything."
"You know about his dad don't you?" Rhuben asked flat out.
"You know?" James asked, his eyes widening. "I didn't think he told you." Rhuben pressed her lips together, her nose wrinkling as she shook her head. "He didn't. So how do you know?"
"Does it matter?" Rhuben asked, spinning her car keys around her finger. "I don't know how to bring it up to him or if I even should. Do I wait for him to tell me? I mean, we can always tell when something's bothering us, I could see it when he had come over my house the other day to give me my camera bag back. He didn't want to talk about it, so I didn't press the subject. But now that I know…I don't know what to do."
"Well…Logan found out about your guys's abuse and he told you that he knew. It's kind of the same thing, right?" James asked, briefly glancing upwards, slowing his pace. "It's dealing with someone that you care about, but in his case, keeping the secret was hurting someone. I can't quite tell you if this is hurting him. People keep secrets for a reason. You two say you can tell each other everything, so who cares how long it takes for that to happen?"
"That's really smart, Handsome," Rhuben said with a half smile.
"I have my moments, Beautiful," James replied, using his free hand to gently pinch at her chin, making a clicking sound with his mouth as he winked at her. He then lifted a hand and started rubbing at his hair. "Now, I hope you have enough Cuda products at your house to get all the sand out of my hair."
"We wouldn't want you to call the FBI again, would we, mate?" Rhuben asked with a grin. James rolled his eyes.
"That was one time!" he loudly protested. "Besides, I don't have a lot of hair to deal with now."
"You know, I'm still surprised you got your hair cut in the first place," Rhuben pointed out, giving him a look of approval. "Not that I'm not relieved, your old cut made you look like a girl." James let out a loud gasp. "That was one of the reasons why I never dated you, by the way."
"So even if we dated, and we took our relationship as slow as you wanted—"
"Intially, it'd be fine," Rhuben replied with a nod of her head. "But…I'm not great with changes in relationships." James gave her a confused look. "Intimacy. Hand holding and kissing, that's no problem, it's everything after that." James slowly nodded his head, a curious look crossing his face. Rhuben continued to explain. "Just bad past experiences. Nothing bad happened, it was just basically one of those, I didn't get what I want so I'm going to dump you, kind of thing."
"That sucks," James commented and Rhuben nodded in agreement. "Well…just know that I wouldn't ever do that to you. Neither would Logan."
"I know," Rhuben replied with a smile. "I know."
A/N: And the main storyline comes in starting with the next chapter. I felt like this was mre of a filler/info dump kind of chapter, but I needed it to be here before I really got into everything.
-Rhuben