Dark Rebel: It's amazing! You're not dead!

Tutankhamunfreak: Course I'm not dead. My computer died not me!

Darren and Dark Rebel: Shame.

Tutankhamunfreak: Hey no fair! I just gave you cupcakes and biscuits and pizza!

Darren: You didn't give us any blood and I haven't had any in a while.

Tutankhamunfreak: May I point out that he is lying. I watched him drink from some random guy last night which disturbing enough as it was he doesn't need any.

Dark Rebel: I do.

Tutankhamunfreak: You just fought a war. You don't need any.

Dark rebel: Damn I thought I was on to her.

Tutankhamunfreak: Ha ha. You have to do the disclaimers now.

Dark rebel: Why?

Darren: Because if you don't she won't any more of your story and your what? Six chapters away from being finished.

Dark rebel: I have no idea but fine. Tutankhamunfreak does not own Darren Shan or any of the other characters from the Saga.

Tutankhamunfreak: See that wasn't so hard was it?

Dark Rebel: no but what's this I hear about you starting a new story? And Arthur and Merlin being tortured? Are you trying to get yourself killed?

Tutankhamunfreak: Oh, Dark Rebel. Always the peacemaker. I should have brought your brother.

Dark Rebel and Darren: (shouting) No! Anything but that!

Alan groaned as he clambered to his feet for the umpteenth time that evening. Or maybe it was morning? Or the middle of the day? He didn't know anymore and to be honest he didn't care. He ached all over and neither woman seemed ready to call it a night.

"Come on Alan! I know you can do better than that!" Debbie encouraged as she set up for another fight. Alan and Tommy had been training with both Debbie and Alice along with several trainee vampires who were intent on knocking them both out.

"I'd do better if I could rest for a bit," Alan panted, trying to catch his breath. He had lasted about four minuets this tie which was much better than when he had first tried. And that had been against Debbie.

"Our enemies are not resting!" Vanez barked. The blind vampire struck out again and Alan yelped as the vampire's fist made contact with the side of his head. He hit the floor again and didn't even try to get up this time. Vanez sighed. "Fine you can rest for now. You complain worse than Darren did when he was taking his Trials of Initiation the first time!" Alan blew his hair out of his face. It had been growing out and now reached his shoulders. He felt like he could count how long he had been in the mountain by how long his hair was.

Tommy came over and helped him to his feet. Tommy was much better stamina wise since he was used go harsh exercise. Even so neither was doing particularly well. Not that that was a bad thing. The worse they did the more Vanez would compare them to Darren which, annoying as it was, showed a comparison between what Darren had been like when he had arrived. Strangely, Darren seemed far more amusing than troublesome.

"We've been at this all night, every night. Couldn't' we just move on to something else?" Alan asked, aware that he was starting to sound like a whiney teenager.

"No. If you don't cover the basics then we cannot move on. And that means that when you move back out into the world you won't last five minutes in any kind of fight," Vanez said as he had said so many times before.

"Who are these enemies again? I thought you weren't at war anymore," Tommy asked. Alan had wondered about this too. They had been in the mountain for probably months now and they had never once been told who they were meant to be fighting. They had tried looking for Darren to ask him but he seemed to be avoiding them. Either that or he was sick which had been the case a couple of times. The vampires that had given them this news had looked anxious and scared and Alan couldn't blame them. He had learnt from Seba that vampires didn't normally catch diseases and yet Darren seemed to be sick a lot nowadays. There was something going on and it had something to do with Darren's supposed 'death'. Nothing seemed to really make much sense.

"We aren't but some Vampaneze want their Lord back. They think all his ideals were right and that they should have won the war instead of their being an agreement to live peacefully beside each other again. They have a crafty way of learning who has been in contact with vampire and they will stop at nothing to kill people who have even if, like you, they had no idea as to who the vampires are," Vanez said quietly. "Now back to fighting!" Alan groaned as he dragged himself back into a fighting stance against, thankfully, Debbie. She gave him an encouraging smile before attacking.

Later on that night, probably going to early morning, Alan found himself wandering through the tunnels of Vampire Mountain. He was careful to make sure that he stuck to the tunnels that he knew so that he would be able to make his way back to his room. He wasn't particularly looking for anyone at this point in time and he hadn't realised that he hadn't been as careful as he should have until he was completely lost. He was standing in the middle of a crossroad of tunnels that he had never seen before and none of the surrounding tunnels looked familiar either.

"Damn," Alan swore to himself. He looked around a moment and was about to head off down one of the tunnels when a voice behind him said,

"I wouldn't go down there if I was you." Alan turned on his heel and saw Darren leaning against the tunnel wall opposite him. For a moment he thought about ignoring Darren and heading off down the corridor anyway but shook his head at that. That was a stupid, childish thing to do and he was well into his thirties now.

"What's down this tunnel?" Alan asked out of curiosity. It was his first actual conversation with Darren since seeing him all that time ago and he was blowing it on a conversation about a tunnel. He could have rolled his eyes at himself.

"Nothing much. It's just where all the spiders live and you used to be scared stiff of spiders," Darren said almost conversationally, as if it really were nothing. Alan backtracked away from the tunnel as fast as he could. He really hated spiders.

"So, err, do you know the way back to somewhere recognisable?" Alan asked over his shoulder. A small snort of laughter came from behind him.

"Course."

"Can you take me back without going through spider infested tunnels please?"

"What kind of friend do you take me for?" Alan blinked at that and turned to face Darren. He noted that Darren looked a little surprised himself at that but it was carefully hidden almost instantly.

"So you still think of me and Tommy as your friends? Even after all these years?" Alan asked. Darren's eyes fell to the floor.

"Always." Alan frowned.

"So why not come back? Why go through all this? Why put us through everything you have?" Darren's face twisted.

"It's complicated. You shouldn't even be here let alone be talking to me." Alan blinked at how tight Darren's voice was. He noticed vaguely that Darren was still wearing the bracelets that he had been wearing the last time he had seen him.

"Fine. Then why should you be dead?" Alan felt a slight satisfaction at the fact that he had finally gotten around to saying what he had wanted to say all along. Darren, however, seemed to be struggling to answer that though. It was almost as if there was some internal battle going on inside him.

"I… It's… well…" Daren sighed as if he couldn't get the words out right. "It's a long story. I'm sorry." Alan paused. It had been twenty five years since he had seen his friend and here he was, apologising for something that Alan was only vaguely aware of.

"I've got all night. You look as if you need someone to talk to," Alan said quietly. Darren looked away.

"The night will be finished in about three hours. Then the sun will come up," he said slightly off handedly. Alan scowled.

"I don't care. We're in a mountain aren't we?"

"Well… yeah."

"Then tell me." Darren looked at Alan almost sorrowfully and Alan was shocked to find that his eyes were older than the rest of his face. They seemed even older than Alan himself.

"I guess it started the day you brought the flyer for the Cirque Du Freak," Darren said quietly. Alan walked over to him and they both silently sank to the floor. Darren still had his eyes set to the floor.

"I'm guessing that I should have left that at home now," Alan laughed. Darren gave a small smile.

"Yeah. You probably should have." There was silence for a moment and then, "Are you sure you want to know?" Alan glanced up at Darren and nodded.

"I thought you were dead for over half my life. I never understood why that was. I want to know why you faked your death and why you never came back." Darren sighed again and began again.

"At the Cirque there was this spider… her name was Madame Octa and she was owned by a man named Mr Crepsley. After the show ended Steve told me to wait for him outside the theatre. I never went out there. I went up to the balcony of the theatre and spied on him. He met with Mr Crepsley and asked him to... to be a vampire." Darren went quiet as if remembering this all over again. There was something else there too. A kind of regret.

"And did he?" Alan asked quietly, slightly shocked. Darren shook his head.

"No. his blood was tainted with evil. If Mr Crepsley had known how far that would go he would have run a mile away. Everyone would have. But I'm getting off topic aren't I?" Darren looked up at him with a sort of half smile.

"Yeah, you are," Alan said, smiling back.

"So anyway, I ran home that night instead of going back to Steve's. But I couldn't take my mind off of that spider. I had to have her. I don't know why. I knew then that Mr Crepsley was a vampire and I was scared shitless but I just had to have her. So I stupidly went and stole her."

"I thought Madame Octa was poisonous?" Alan interrupted. Darren's face twisted.

"She was. One day Steve came over and asked why I had been avoiding him. I had perfected how to control her but only if I had concentration. While I was showing her to Steve, Annie walked in." Alan paled.

"Oh no. The spider didn't…"

"She did. Annie did what most people would have and screamed. I lost concentration and Madame Octa took the chance and bit Steve. Luckily for him she was taught to only bite once to paralyze and then bite to kill. She never got the chance to finish him off."

"So what did you do with her then?"

"Threw her out of the window."

"What?" Darren half laughed at the expression of shock that Alan could feel etched across his face.

"Don't worry. Mr Crepsley had been stalking me since the night I had stolen her. He caught her and took off. In the end, I got so worried about Steve that I made a deal with Mr Crepsley. If he saved Steve's life, I would be his assistant. He changed me before I got away but he didn't follow me. He knew what would happen."

"So that's why you started drinking my blood the day when you played lousy after you were on a roll," Alan said, realising that this must have been after. Darren flushed bright red but didn't deny it.

"I almost fed on Annie too. I didn't though and let Mr Crepsley help me fake my death so that no one would look for me when we left. We travelled a lot after that but we eventually went back to the Cirque. I made friends with the snake boy. His name was Evra. He has two kids now…" Darren trailed off for a moment, eyes distant and sad. Alan stayed silent knowing that Darren would continue when he was ready.

"I also made friends with a boy named Sam Grest," Darren said, shaking himself out of his reverie. "Unfortunately for him I invited a man named RV along the same night that he visited the Cirque Du Freak. RV was an eco-warrior and freed to wolf man who subsequently bit off his arms."

"Excuse me?"

"The Wolf man really was a wolf man not some hairy guy. Don't worry RV lived. Sam wasn't so lucky. The wolf man chased to a disused railway and… well… he killed Sam. I…" Darren was obviously finding it hard to say what he wanted. He was absentmindedly rubbing the bands on his wrists. "I had to drink every last drop of blood from him."

"What?" Darren paused before explaining.

"When a vampire or vampaneze drain a person dry, as horrible as that is, they retain a part of a person's soul. There used to be a Vampire Prince here named Paros Skyle. He drank from William Shakespeare and wrote down many of his plays and poems that, had he not, would have been lost forever. When I drank from Sam, I hadn't drunk blood for months and so needed to drink to live as well as to keep a part of him alive. I still have his love of pickled onions." Alan raised an eyebrow at that but didn't question it.

"After that, I and Mr Crepsley became closer. More like friends rather than a pair of people forced to live together. That was the year that we went to Mr Crepsley's home town and took Evra with us. I met a girl there." There was a sudden flash in Darren's eyes. "Dare you to guess who she was?" Alan blinked. How was he supposed to know who she was?

"I haven't got a clue."

"I'll give you a clue. You've already met her." Alan thought for a moment and felt his mouth fall open.

"Not… not Debbie Hemlock?" Darren laughed.

"Yes, Debbie Hemlock. She thought that I and Evra were brothers back then since we looked around the same age. In the end though I ended up having to use her as bait to trap a mad vampaneze who had been terrorizing the town. I think she's forgiven me.

Anyway, nothing much happened for nearly seven years. Then I had to come here for the first time. I think you've heard what a trial that was?"

"You had to take your trails of initiation." Darren snorted.

"I had to prove myself and the trials were designed for fully turned vampires who want to become generals. Were you also told that I ended up failing the first lot, jumping into a rapid stream to escape a traitorous Vampire Prince to be, ran naked with wolves and ended up coming back and stopping the traitor from becoming a Prince. And becoming a Prince myself?"

"No." Darren shook his head with a half-smile on his face.

"I should have run away then. I should have just stuck with the wolf pack but I didn't. Not that I regretted that. I had to leave eventually though. I and Mr Crepsley were supposedly two of the only three people who could kill the Lord of the Vampaneze. In the end we were following the wrong person and we didn't learn that until we had met Evanna, I had gone through the first stage of the purge, fought a short fight with the phoney Vampaneze lord, I had been forced to go to school, been arrested and then lost Mr Crepsley in tunnels after having been betrayed by none other than Steve."

"Steve was there?" Alan knew that Steve had had some issues but joining with the vampaneze who so far didn't sound too appealing? He wondered what else Steve had been up to.

"Yes, Steve was there. He was the reason why Mr Crepsley died a pointless death. We all thought he had fought and killed the Lord of the Vampaneze but Steve was too far gone in the moment to stop to think about it. He told me the truth. The real vampaneze lord was him. He had lied to us and in the end we had to flee. It took a while to get over Mr Crepsley's death. He was… almost like a father to me I guess. It almost seems surreal now that I think about it.

Around about this time, a friend of mine named Harkat Mulds, who was a little person-"

"What's a Little Person?" Alan asked.

"A person who has been dragged out of the Lake of Souls by Mr Tiny and made a deal with him. Their body is then melted down in an acid and fed into a stitched up body that's make up of dead men's parts a bit like Frankenstein. Some have tongues to talk with like Harkat but they can't taste a thing and they don't have a nose to smell with. Normal air is also poisonous to them so they all wear special mask which filter the air so that it is breathable for them."

"Oh."

"Anyway, around this time my friend Harkat started having nightmares. Long story short we got sent into the future and had to fight grotesque human mutant caterpillars, giant toads and dragons that were genetically modified dinosaurs." Alan felt as if Darren wanted to say more on that but he didn't.

"Harkat found out who he had been and we ended up back here. Then the Cirque went on back to our hometown and that's when things went downhill again. Steve turned up and I found out that I had a nephew in a rather unpleasant situation." Darren grimaced at that.

"What do you mean by Unpleasant?"

"Steve had kidnapped Evra's oldest boy, Shancus and killed him. I had to inform Annie that her son was a half vampaneze, all the while going through the purge and ended up doing a rather dangerous blood transfer that was probably not the best idea. We went back to the Cirque and I and Steve ended up fighting. There are some things that I can't tell you about that night but the main thing is that both I and Steve died. We killed each other and fell into a river. I was fished out of the Lake of Souls- that's where all dead souls that don't reach Paradise go- and here I am." Alan thought for a moment. It certainly was a long story.

"What's Paradise? I thought you were a Christian."

"I was but vampires have their own religion. Paradise is our version of heaven and the Lake of Souls is the literal hell, even if you don't deserve to go there. Trust me when I say that's it's easier to be mad in the Lake of Souls than to be sane." Alan was quiet for a moment but Darren cut him off before he spoke.

"You should head back to your room. Come, on. I'll show you the way." And with that Darren got up and refused to speak another word.

Darren: wow that was double the length of the last chapter.

Dark Rebel: I'd say it was more triple.

Tutankhamunfreak: You know I don't think anyone cares how much longer this chapter is to the last one. They just care that the story's been updated and it's a longer chapter.

Darren: yes, but then it's more time about me.

(Tutankhamunfreak rolls her eyes)

Dark rebel: By the way what was the shouting in the background?

Tutankhamunfreak: Oh, that was just my dad telling me to stop spellchecking this chapter, or as he puts it 'Now stop writing that shit and do as you're told!'

Darren: Nice guy. I never knew that we were shit.

Tutankhamunfreak: yeah, he's cranky cos he lost his job and is stuck at hoe looking for a new one. On the up side though he doesn't have to work with people who annoy the hell out of him.

Dark Rebel: I'm glad that we're not living in your house. Living with you dad sounds scary.

Tutankhamunfreak: And living with your brother isn't?

Darren: just to clarify what they're saying, Dark rebel's brother dropped in one day and although they're twins, he is much scarier and nearly killed us all. Apparently he has blood issues.

Tutankhamunfreak: ha, you haven't met his girlfriend.

Darren: now I'm just confused. Explain this story to me again.

(Tutankhamunfreak face palms)

Dark rebel: I take that as a never mind. Hope you liked the chapter.

Darren: yeah, less torture happened in the making of this chapter.

Tutankhamunfreak: yes, i hoped you liked the chapter much more than I like my form at the moment. We were meant to be doing a swimming gala today and I was the ONLY person who turned up with kit to do it.

Darren: yeah, she's not happy at the moment. You can probably tell from the shouting match with her dad.

Tutankhamunfreak: (Tutankhamunfreak's brohter jumps in and shouts BOO!). Yeah that wasn't funny either. now get out of here and back where you belong.

Tutankhamunfreak's brother: NEVER!

Darren and Dark Rebel: Oh, no.