AN: Chapter five already! I thank those who've kept with this story this long and those who have just begun to read this. Please review or message me with your opinions and feedback, whether it is positive or negative! It encourages me, hearing back from you guys.
This was mouse-brained.
A mixture of guilt and excitement boiled in Silverpaw's stomach, making her feel nauseous and reminding her of her days of a kit, sickly and vomiting. With every step she took, she was tempted to take a step backwards, back to camp. A stab of guilt wracked her again as she remembered sneaking out the apprentice's den. Nightpaw had sleepily left his head when she got up from his side. She had told the first lie in her life. That she was going to the dirtplace and that she would be right back.
She loved and trusted her brother, but she couldn't tell him that she was going to meet a Shadowclan warrior, of all things.
He wouldn't understand.
After all, she hardly understood why she was doing this herself.
"Fallenfire?" She whispered, her mew hardly more than a soft breath. She was where he had asked her to meet him, but she couldn't scent him. Wind blew in her fur, ruffling it. Was this a trick? A cruel prank on a Thunderclan apprentice? Or even worse! Fear wracked her. What if this was an ambush? She hardly seemed important enough to lure away from camp to kill. Unless Shadowclan was doing it to weaken her father. She thought of Stormstar, the grief he tried to hide in his eyes every time he saw her. He called her his little miracle and she had overheard him murmuring to Cloudwhisker that she looked just like her mother. She couldn't remember Breezewing very well, just a few flashes of vague memories and warm milk scent mixed with sickness and fear. Remembering the hurt in her father's eyes, she realized that any one of his kit's deaths would break him.
Backing up, she prepared to run back to camp. This was a horrible idea! How could she have let herself be so easily manipulated–?
"Silverpaw?" It was too late. Flattening her ears, she unsheathed her claws.
"What's wrong?" Concern flashed in the gigantic dappled golden tom's eyes. Her fur slowly flattened and she opened her mouth, breathing in his warm scent. He was alone. She hadn't been betrayed.
A tongue rasped over her ear. Silverpaw blinked up in surprise at the gentle motion. The tom's expression was hard to read, but he was looking at her with a gentle look, similar to the way her father looked upon her. She leaned against him, unsheathing her claws and shivering a little, despite herself.
"Don't be afraid. I'm here."
"I-I'm not afraid!" Silverpaw finally found her tongue, pulling away and quickly licking the fur on her chest down.
"Your fear-scent suggest otherwise." Fallenfire said quietly, blinking in soft amusement at her. She hissed, swatting at his ear. He ducked.
"Hey!" He protested, "What was that for?"
Whiskers quivering, she leaped on top of him. Anxiety still stirred in her stomach, but she purred as she pushed him to the ground, laying on top of him with a sheathed paw on his throat. "Say that again! Thunderclan warriors aren't afraid of anything." She proclaimed.
"Oh really?" Fallenfire purred, flicking his tail and not making a move to dislodge her, "I wasn't the one shaking in fear."
"Take that back!" She lightly bit her teeth into the loose skin around his neck, careful not to draw blood.
"You'll have to make me!" The tom's eyes glew with mischievousness and he suddenly pushed her off of him, prancing a few steps away, the tip of his tail twitching.
Silverpaw launched herself at him and they wrestled for a few moments, before she found herself pinned to the ground with his heavy weight on top of her. "Get off of me!" She pushed at his shoulders.
"Oh no! All the strength is draining out of my body! Can't… stay… upright… any… longer…" With a distinct oof, he collapsed onto her, his deadweight crushing her. Silverpaw squealed, squirming, but he easily weighed more than twice she did. After a few moments, she stopped moving, panting.
"You're crushing me, you great lump!"
"Can't… move…" He gasped dramatically, "Only a kiss from a beautiful she-cat can break my curse…!"
Silverpaw quickly licked his cheek, before pinning her ears back in embarrassment, looking away as he pushed himself off of her. She scrambled to her feet. Her eyes only met his as he gently rested his head against her, giving her a soft lick. His scent washed over hers, smelling like the pine trees his clan lived in and faintly of sweet sap.
"You saved me." He teased, "Your debt has been repaid."
"Hey! I never asked you to save me in the first place." She protested.
"Oh? Would you prefer I have let you drown in the lake?"
"Shut up." She grumbled, then after a moment, added softly, "Thank you for saving me, though. I never really got to thank you before."
Fallenfire was quiet. For a long time, they sat side by side, their fur brushing together. Usually, Silverpaw found silence uncomfortable, doing her best to always fill it up with as much chatter as she could. But next to this tom she barely knew, she felt oddly at ease. She would have been content to watch the stars with him for moons.
"Thanks for coming, Silverpaw." Fallenfire suddenly mewed, turning his golden gaze upon her.
She blinked. "Why did you ask me to come here?"
He didn't answer immediately and she wondered if that was the wrong thing to ask. He sighed, his shoulders tensing. She was afraid he would get up and walk away. And she didn't know why she cared whether or not he left, because he was a Shadowclan warrior and she was a Thunderclan apprentice and this wasn't in the warrior code.
"I don't know." He finally admitted, "I couldn't get you out of my mind. I had to see you."
Silverpaw leaned against him. "I couldn't get you out of my mind either." She whispered.
"Oh?" He tilted his head, eyes tinted with amusement.
"Shut it, mousebrain." She growled, "I didn't think about you all the time! Just… quite a bit."
"What are you thinking about now?" He met her gaze. She was taken aback by the sudden hunger in his eyes, like her every word was a precious piece of prey in leaf-bare.
"Well…" She started.
They talked for a long time. Silverpaw told him about her three brothers and how they were always getting on her nerves, even Nightpaw. She told him how her clan looked upon her like she was still weak and sick and how they never thought she could do anything. Fallenfire told her how he had grown up without a father.
"My clanmates never trusted me either, but in a different way. They didn't know who my father was and I didn't look like anyone else in the clan. My denmates called me a kittypet." He had mewed.
"Do you know who your father is?" She had asked quietly. She couldn't imagine not knowing who her parents were. She may not remember Breezewing very well, but she knew that she had been a loyal Thunderclan warrior. She couldn't imagine not knowing if her mother was a clan cat, a rogue or even a kittypet.
He shook his head. "My mother won't talk about it."
"I'm sorry." They were quiet after that, laying together until the sun began to rise above the horizon. Fallenfire was the first to move, stirring from their makeshift nest. He gently nudged her from the soft doze she had fallen into.
"I've got to go. Can I see you again?"
Silverpaw knew she should say no. This was forbidden.
But instead, she whispered,
"Yes."