Lupin felt narcoleptic. Watching the beautiful tree-lined streets and fields of grass that swayed in the wind did not help him stay awake. After half an hour of driving, he just wanted to shut his eyes and drift away. Every few minutes, he'd glance up at his rear-view mirror, expecting to see Jigeen sleeping, or Goemon, unyielding, meditating in the backseat. But all he saw was his propped up fishing rod device.

The turns in the road were subtle and soft as clouds. Lupin barely had to move the steering wheel. Forty minutes passed, fifty minutes, an hour. Lupin yawned. The road swerved. His eyes flew open and he wrenched the steering wheel. The Fiat spun tight, scorching the road.

"Geez, who designed this crazy street?!" Lupin continued driving for a few more minutes before he pulled up to Yaeyama Hospital. By this time, the sky was stained a greenish-brown with sunset. The cloud cover was dense, and the grey hospital stood out against the sky.

"Time to give myself a little insurance," Lupin whispered. He pressed a button on the Fiat's dashboard. In a flash, the yellow paint job flaked off like frost, replaced by mauve paint instead. Lupin smirked and got out of the car. He stretched out and touched his toes. He took the fishing rod device out of the back and put it over his shoulder.

Lupin clicked his heels together. Wheels popped out of the soles and he skated down the road, past the houses. His hair blew back in the wind as he flew back and forth, easily evading the traffic. Drivers blared their horns at him, but Lupin didn't care at all.

By the time he reached Yaeyama Museum, it was nighttime. The streetlights were alight, and they illuminated the signs outside the museum with captions like: "Yonaguni ruins excavated! Ancient golden crown discovered!"

Lupin frowned as he studied the museum. What's up with this? he thought. The paint on the front of the museum was cracked and off-color. The building itself was very small, like a beach house. Even the rose bushes outside the museum looked twisted to Lupin.

He shook his head. I don't need anything grandiose. Stealing it will be grand enough! He sneaked around the back, careful not to let his shoes squeak. Lupin thought the museum looked so dingy, he didn't need to worry about an outside laser net. He took out two small suction cups from his jacket pockets and squinted, staring up at the clouds. Lupin wrapped the fishing rod in his legs, and sticking the suction cups to the wall, he tried not to the rustle the bushes, and climbed up the wall, sweat dripped down his brow as he strained, trying not to drop the fishing rod. He groaned quietly. Wish I had some help here, he thought.

By the time he reached the roof, Lupin felt felt his limbs were wet noodles with lead weights tied to them. He fell flat on his back, moaning. Water splashed on his face. Lupin opened his eyes, hearing the rush of water ringing in his ears. It was raining.

Lupin sighed. "Just great." With great difficulty, he stood up. He put the suction cups back in his pocket, and pulled out a little saw that looked like a super-sharp pizza cutter. Lupin turned it on, and started cutting a small circle in the roof. Water sprayed in all directions off the spinning blade, the droplets hitting Lupin in the face. By the time the circle was cut, Lupin was soaked. He took the suction cups out, and pulled the circle up. He slid it to the side.

Lupin grinned, relieved. "If I'm feeling extra generous," he whispered to himself, "I'll pay the museum back for the rain damage." Lupin picked up the fishing rod. He placed in on the roof, sticking it in place with yet another suction cup. He reeled out a long line, and attached the metal hook to his jacket lapel, and he took out a remote control for the line. He kept the saw in his hand for any display cases he might come across, and he slowly repelled into the building.

Lupin shut his eyes for a few seconds to adjust to the dark museum. He opened them, and saw that the crown was right below him, in a glass case. Lupin grinned, but his grin fell when he saw a man slumped over next to the case. Lupin recognized the brown hat the man had on.

Pops?! Lupin's eyes bugged out. Come on! Why does he have to defend third-rate places like this?

Lupin kept suspended at the same level for a while. He glared at Zenigata, and heard him snoring. "Hm... he's not even talking in his sleep. I should be able to get by him."

He leaned down, until the display case was only an arms-length away. He fiddled with the remote control, and the rod let down more line. Holding the saw tightly, he reached out with practiced precision. The blade touched the glass with a pointed clink.

Lupin seized up. He looked down, but Zenigata hadn't stirred. Lupin smiled. But as he got ready to turn on the blade, a few drops of water fell from his sleeve. Zenigata turned over in his sleep, and the drops of water hit him right in his eyes.

Zenigata sat up instantly. "Lupin!" he screamed on impulse. Like a zombie, he grabbed Lupin's arm and yanked him down, slamming him on the floor. Lupin tried to yell, but his face was mashed onto the floor, and his voice was muffled.

"Hah! Once again, my patience paid off!" Zenigata took out a pair of handcuffs, and slapped them on Lupin. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Mph!"

"Oh, sorry about that." Zenigata stood up, pulling Lupin up with him. "As I was saying, crime never pays! And nobody believed me when I said you'd be here. Nobody understood my sixth sense about—"

"Don't say stuff like that, Pops, you're starting to sound like Goemon." Lupin was already fiddling with the handcuffs.

Zenigata smiled sheepishly. "Well, you know. Where are Goemon and Jigen, anyway? Without them, there's no way you can get away!"

Lupin gritted his teeth. "Shut up."

When Zenigata turned to ask Lupin what his problem was, he found the handcuffs were attached to something on the floor. He looked down at the floor, and saw a life-sized Lupin doll.

The real Lupin, meanwhile, ran in the other direction. "You shouldn't tease me, Pops!" he yelled. He ran past the other displays, to the back door. He skidded to a halt. "Hey, wait, why aren't you chasing after m—" He was cut off as a metal plate swinging down from the ceiling smacked him in the face.

Zenigata caught up with him. He lung another pair of handcuffs on a line, and cuffed Lupin's right foot. "Hah! You didn't notice any of those special motion-tracking cameras I had the staff set up, did you?! You've gone soft!"

Lupin scowled. "Just a demo to demonstrate to myself what I'm smart enough to avoid," he muttered.

"But if you ran into it, then you're not smart enough to... never mind. I don't have time for this!" Zenigata leapt forward, and tackled Lupin to the floor. Zenigata pulled the line attached to the cuffs taut, and reached down with one hand to start touching Lupin's right leg.

"You perverted old man!" yelled Lupin. His arms were flailing. "Do you have some leg fetish?!"

Zenigata pulled off a casing around Lupin's leg, taking his shoe with it. He tipped it over, and all sorts of gadgets fell out, scattering on the hardwood.

"Uh... okay, maybe that was a little justified. But you didn't have to take my shoe, too!"

Zenigata removed the shoe from the fake leg, and dumped even more gadgets out of it.

One uncomfortable pat down later, Zenigata had Lupin cuffed and hung from the ceiling. But Zenigata paused before calling for reinforcements. He clears his throat.

ZENIGATA:

I knew I'd catch you in the end!

You ran around without a care,

but I'm a good guy, I always played fair.

On me, justice can depend!

Zenigata has his eyes closed, singing a long note. He holds his arm out, waiting for Lupin in sing a verse.

"Uh... hey! You're supposed to sing now! It takes two to—" Zenigata looked around the museum. Lupin was nowhere to be found. "Crap, crap, crap!"

Meanwhile, Lupin had escaped the building. He ran down the streets, his head reeling. Hard rain hit him in the face, too much water for him to wipe away. Zenigata had taken Lupin's shoes, so he could not get back to his car quickly. After only a few minutes, Lupin's feet started to hurt. Rocks and grit was ground into his foot, and with each step his feet got more and more little scrapes.

He slowed down as he approached the hospital. But before he could run to the freedom of his Fiat, he heard police sirens. Lupin cursed and started running down a different street. When he felt like his legs would fall off, he slowed his pace.

Lupin stares down at his soaked jacket, and his eyes follow the stream of water rushing down the road spiral into the drain. Gritting his teeth, he looks up to the cloudy sky. He sings snatches of a sad tune.

LUPIN:

Doo-dloo-doo-doo-doo...

Eventually sick of singing that over and over, he begins the lyrics. The sound in the background is like Broadway jazz, that's suspiciously similar to a famous song, but is absolutely not copyright infringement.

Complainin' in the rain,

Just complainin' in the rain.

What a terrible feeling.

They ignored me again.

I'm staring at clouds, so dark up above.

Pops stole my pride,

while my so-called friends speak of love.

As Lupin shuffles along the road, a car drives by incredibly fast, splashing dirty water all over him. His normally pristine jacket is ruined. He spits the water out of his mouth, and his eyes narrow. He almost growls the next verse.

Let the storm clouds fly in

and ruin their place!

They should be caught in this rain,

as I watch with a smile on my face.

I'll skip down the lane,

with a happy refrain,

I'll be just singin',

laughin' at their pain!

Lupin almost flies down the sidewalk now, the warmth of planned vengeance keeping him going. He keeps rushing until he hears police sirens coming from in front of him. Just as the blue and red lights are speeding into view, Lupin ducks into a dark, dank, alley. Among the trash and abandoned hobo clothing, he feels somehow sad. His tune grows wistful once more.

Why am I frowning?

And why do I sigh?

Why do I feel like

I wish I could die?

Why has this happened?

Everything fell apart.

I'm soaked, standin' head down,

with a pain in my heart.

Why is each new heist

a trifle to do?

Because I am living,

a life without... you.

Lupin sighed. "I need a cab..."