Interlude
Chapter 8
A/N: Beginning of the chapter is a tough read, but it may explain why Ziva would not talk to Tony on the plane home. I originally intended to have the story end with them all entering NCIS in triumph with the applause, but that's honestly not where the story ends. So, there will be more. I also realise there is some confusion over the renaming and rewriting of chapters. My fault for being too eager to tell a story and not look at the canon. This is cool, but I will be renaming and reloading chapters. Sorry. Guilty as charged with such a sensitive and emotional subject. Breaking Rule one; Sorry.
Ziva tossed and turned under her warm blankets, trapped in a nightmare so detailed and deep that she could find no way out of. Her terrified heart beat frantically in her chest, threatening to tear a hole in it to escape the horror to come. She made a strangled cry as the nightmare deepened.
Saleem smiled that deadly smile at her and she knew no good could come of it. What more was he going to do to her? She'd already been beaten from head to toe with fists, kicking feet, batons, once a brick and more, bones broken in a most methodical manner, starved, dehydrated, lost more blood than she ever imagined she had in herself, cut with knives, stabbed and left to bleed, burned by whatever was lit and handy, and violated by not just him, but each of the men in the camp. Not a single one of them was gentle and she bled and was torn and never wanted anyone there again. She could not imagine anyone being able to touch her again and she to find it comforting. Touch was pain. She had begun to long for the peace of death.
Saleem turned his back on her. When he turned around she saw that he had a red hot poker, like the one she saw to stir the embers for a fireplace like the one at Ducky's that she saw last Thanksgiving. Ice cold terror clamped itself around her heart as he advanced on her.
"Hold her down," He said to his men.
She began to fight against them; to thrash, but she was so weakened that it wasn't really a fight. Saleem came closer and she could tell by the look in his eyes where he was going to use that glowing end.
Ziva screamed at the top of her lungs.
Tony ran the last of the length of the hallway to her room and tried to hold her, to wake her, but she was too deep in her nightmare. She screamed again and it sounded like her soul was being torn in two. Tony shook her to wake her. She was terrifying him.
"Ziva!" he shouted at her, shaking her gently. "Wake up. It's a nightmare. Wake up!"
"No, please, no!" she cried, eyes flying open, yet not really seeing the hospital room around her. She fought against Tony's gentle hands. "No!"
He wouldn't be pushed away. "Ziva, it's Tony. You're having a nightmare. Come back to me."
Ziva only became more panicked, screamed again, and curled herself into a protective ball and wept inconsolably, the nightmare/memory still too fresh in her mind. She did remember that Saleem had been interrupted at the last minute by news of new prisoners, which were McGee and Tony, taken and the heat of that device only ghosting the target area. Whomever the new prisoners were gave her a reprieve, not a rescue. He would be back to continue. She screamed again at Tony's tender touch.
"Wake up!" He finally gave her a hard shake and her eyes suddenly focused on him."Tony?"
"Who else would it be?" He stroked her sweat matted hair in the most gentle of manners. "You were having a nightmare."
She couldn't be comforted and continued to weep, rocking her body in an effort to soothe herself, but to no avail. She shrank away from Tony's gentle touch. "Do not touch me! Go away! Leave me alone!" she shouted.
Tony had seen her weep and held her as she did so and she wasn't frightened by him at all. Now, however, she was in absolute terror of his very presence. He had to try. "Ziva, talk to me."
When he reached out a gentle hand she screamed into her pillow and shrank away from him.
He was in utter shock at the display. Eyes full of sorrow and pain, he backed out of her room. He wiped at a lone tear and dragged a chair over and sat outside her door, listening to her anguished sobs, helpless to do anything for her. He was so confused by everything that he could not bring himself to visit her again, although he longed to.
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Why the hell was she so nervous? She was being released. She was going home. Granted, she had no apartment any longer since Mossad "cleaned up" their mess by blowing her beautiful new place to smithereens. She would be staying with Gibbs while she finished recovering. She shrugged into the only clothing that she still owned, which was the clothing she wore when they left Saleem's camp. The clothing had been washed, but it all hung on her slender frame. Trust men to forget something as simple as getting her something else to wear. She was shaken out of her thoughts by the door opening.
Gibbs took in her appearance and gave her an encouraging smile. She looked nervous as hell. "Let's go home, Ziver," he said, offering her the wheelchair.
"Do I have to go in that?" she asked, eying the chair.
He nodded. "Hospital policy. You can walk out once we get you out the doors. Come on."
She stood and carefully walked to the chair and sat, placing her feet on the rests. "Where is Tony?"
"He'll meet us at the plane," Gibbs replied. Tony had told him everything and it shocked the older man as well. She was far more damaged than either man had thought possible and still be sane. She was going to have a very long road ahead of her.
"Oh." Ziva wasn't certain that she could face Tony after what she said and did to him yesterday morning. She felt guilty and ashamed of her behavior. She hoped that no one else knew because she wouldn't be able to take it. How she must have hurt Tony when he was only trying to help.
Gibbs wheeled her out the hospital doors and over to the car. "Go on, get in." He held the chair steady for her and helped her get in the car. She was silent all the way to the air base. Only when she saw that they weren't heading toward the C120 that was sitting on the tarmac, did she say anything. "Where are we going? Isn't that our plane?"
"Nope. SecNav sent the Gulfstream over there. Nobody wants you to be bouncing around in a jump seat. You could re injure yourself," Gibbs told her, watching her reaction out of the corner of his eye. She looked distinctly uncomfortable with the prospect of spending a 10 hour flight in such a much smaller space with Tony.
Ziva shifted uncomfortably. "That was kind of him. I must remember to thank him the next time-" she stopped herself, realizing that she might not have a position at NCIS anymore. It was likely that when they thought she was dead, her liaison position was terminated. Her father...no, Eli would have had her declared dead. She likely had no place in Mossad, either. That didn't matter because she had no intention of ever going back. They left her to die. Eli left her to die.
"It's gonna be okay, Ziva," Gibbs said softly, reaching out and holding her hand, giving it a light squeeze. "Let's just work on getting you healed up enough to even think about it."
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"Have ya tried talkin' to her yet, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked, a couple of hours into the flight.
Tony looked back at her where she slept on the couch they made up for her. "She won't talk to me, Boss. She won't even look at me. Do you think she's angry at me because I didn't stay with her?"
Gibbs shook his head, looking back at her as well. "No, I think she's maybe embarrassed by her behavior. She did ask where you were at the hospital, though. Talk to her when she wakes up."
"I don't know."
Gibbs smacked him on the back of the head. "She needs you, Tony. Be there for her when she's ready."
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"We're not taking Ziva to Bethesda?" McGee asked as they drove in the opposite direction. He sat in the back with Ziva, her head resting on his shoulder. The flight exhausted her, even though she slept a good deal of the way back to D.C.
Gibbs shook his head. "Nope, Vance asked us to stop by the Navy Yard first. She can handle the visit."
Tony switched the radio on to cover the uncomfortable silence that fell over the car as Gibbs drove. It wasn't uncomfortable for McGee, since Ziva was allowing him to comfort her and it wasn't uncomfortable for Gibbs because she actually talked to him. No, Tony felt uncomfortable because she still wouldn't look at him; still wouldn't speak to him.
Gibbs pulled into his usual parking spot and helped Ziva from the vehicle. He placed a kiss on her forehead. "A lot of people want to see you, you know. I want you to be prepared."
Ziva nodded once. "I understand."
They got on the elevator and Ziva wavered slightly as it began to ascend. Gibbs steadied her. "You okay?"
She nodded. "I am fine."
In an effort to to lighten the mood, Tony said, "Just another day at the office."
The elevator doors opened and they all just stood there for a moment, then Gibbs stepped out, Ziva stepped out almost on top of him, using him as a shield. She suddenly felt so shy, even though she knew that these people that were turning to look at her, at them, were her co-workers and friends. And then Vance began the applause. First one agent, then another, and another stood from where they were working and began a thunderous ovation that was a little frightening and a lot embarrassing. Then Abby, whom had held her that very first day in Germany, whom had returned to the States, rushed to her, touched her bruised face so tenderly and enfolded her in one of her best hugs, very mindful of Ziva's healing body. Ziva was finally home.