Why I Hate Laura Kalpakian's "Cosette, The Sequel to Les Misérables"
Chapter 2
Kalpakian is still rewriting the ending of Les Misérables. Apparently the original wasn't good enough for her.
(page 11)
Kalpakian makes reference to Marius' mother and him 'enduring the loss' of her. In the brick, Hugo says that Marius' mother died when Marius was very young and, therefore, he would have no memory of her. He did not 'endure the loss' of her.
(page 12)
Marius shouts at a café owner, whom he has just bumped into, "Long live the French Republic!" Marius did not actually have much of an interest in the revolution and only really joined to die, since he could not be with Cosette. He wouldn't have shouted this. Also, Marius seems already to have knowledge of the barricades formed, whereas, in the brick, it was Éponine who says to him "Your friends are waiting for you at the barricade."
(page 13)
Nothing, surprisingly.
(page 14)
Marius has arrived at the barricade way before he actually does in the brick.
(page 15)
Who the hell is Verdier? Laura Kalpakian, you can't expect us to know who a character is when neither you, nor the original author of the original novel has ever mentioned him. Combeferre is described as "perhaps twenty-six, but with the look of middle age and a receding hairline already upon him". Kalpakian, that's Lesgles that you are thinking of. Get your characters right. Also, Combeferre speaks to Marius as if he were a close friend. Marius was not all that close with Combeferre in the brick. And, again, who the hell is Verdier?
(page 16)
"The students mostly wore threadbare coats, trousers shiny at the knee, and frayed cravats..." Um, no. Most of the students were actually well off. How else would they pay for their schooling? The only one that was not a student was Feuilly. Kalpakian suggests that only Marius knows that they are doomed. What about Grantaire? Or Enjolras with his speech "... and it is so that it may come that we are going to die."
(page 17)
She's done this multiple times now, but she keeps writing random words in French, trying to sound like Hugo. It makes no sense to have random words in French, Kalpakian, and it does not make you seem cool. "... but lacking somehow their esprit." There is no reason that esprit shouldn't have been in English. And again, who the hell is Verdier? Why is he of any importance? Why should we care that his wife died of cholera three days ago?
(page 18)
There it is again, "They don't give a damn shit..." Learn some new words. Hugo would never have written this, and Kalpakian's writing is an insult to his genius. Oh, and again, "Casimir Périer got it from fucking his chamber maid." I repeat myself, Hugo made a point of retaining innocence in his writing. Kalpakian is ruining that. Here, Enjolras is described as "thin, sinewy, and fair." this contradicts Hugo, who makes him out to be extremely beautiful.
(page 19)
Enjolras says "The kings of France are finished. The time for the French Republic is now." He wouldn't say that until the battle is won, Kalpakian has made him seem cocky. Kalpakian calls the Corinth a bistro. The Corinth was a wine shop. Kalpakian starts talking, through Enjolras, about Marius' father's Waterloo sword. Even if this had existed in the brick, Enjolras wouldn't know about it because he wouldn't have listened to Marius' prattle about his Bonapartist father and, if he had, he wouldn't have cared enough to remember it.
(page 20)
Here, Marius tells them that the people are not rising. This never happened in the brick. Enjolras has now been described as frail, which, again, contradicts Hugo's description.
(page 21)
Marius says that he knows who Gavroche is, contradicting Hugo AGAIN. In the brick, it is Éponine who points Gavroche out to him as she is dying. Combeferre insults Javert, something that Combeferre wouldn't actually do, by saying "Do you carry your brains in your bladder, Javert?" If Combeferre were to insult someone, he would be a lot more clever than that. Kalpakian has now referenced the musical in having Javert say, "One day more and you'll piss blood..." This is supposed to be the sequel to the book, yet she references the musical and Javert says something completely out of character. Who the hell is Clerons? Kalpakian keeps bringing in characters and not giving us any idea as to who they are. Oh, and this Cleron spits wine in Javert's face.
(page 22)
Kalpakian has just changed Éponine's death. She is not shot protecting Marius, but just shot in the back. Though, for some reason, her hand is bleeding too. Éponine tells Marius that she loves him before she dies, and Marius seems to care a lot more about her than he does in the brick.
(page 23)
Marius kisses Éponine on the lips when she asks him to. Kalpakian references the musical again, "You'll keep me safe, won't you, close?" "Yes. Yes, Éponine. I promise." "Keep me warm?" "I swear." And Éponine's death isn't nearly as touching.
(page 24)
"She died while Marius wept against her pale throat." I'm sorry, but that's just... no... Marius never cried for Éponine in the brick. Her death isn't as meaningful and is changed way too much. Combeferre, Enjolras, Clerons (who ever the hell that is), and Pajol (who ever the hell that is) are all present for her death. In the brick, only Marius is there and her death is much more touching and written better.
Thus concludes chapter 2. Anyone else want to shoot something yet?