Chapter 4- It's Been 20 Years

The icy wind howled outside of the cabin, tapping and banging desperately on the windows and doors whilst Luke tossed and turned during the long night. It was quite chilly indoors but Luke knew that the outside was worse, yet he still couldn't appreciate the comfort of his warm bed or in general, the warm cabin.

It was already 11:32pm and Luke hadn't got any proper sleep due the noise outside and all the different thoughts racing around in his mind, constantly distracting him from getting any sleep, a necessity that he and the group were lucky enough to have within the walls of the safe cabin…

Frustrated, Luke ripped the haggard blankets away from his tired body and got up to light up some candles. He first closed the curtains to stop too much light from escaping the cabin before opening one of his bedside drawers to rummage through the mess to find a matchbox.

Eventually Luke found his matchbox, which contained at least twelve more matchsticks… thank god. He then got up and stumbled in the dark to reach some candles that were already randomly placed around his room…

Once six were lit, enough light to illuminate the room, Luke chucked his matchbox into his bedside drawer before slumping back onto his plush bed to just sit silently, staring off into the other side of his room.

Luke then looked down at his arm, which was still tightly bandaged, making his movements quite restrictive… He cringed as he remembered what he had done to himself late that afternoon… Also his face was still felt quite bruised, remembering that Nick punched him…

Today had been hectic…

Suddenly, a quiet knock at the door sent Luke's wandering thoughts back to reality within a flash!

Who was it?

Wasn't everyone sleeping?

"Yeah? Uh… come, come in…" Luke stuttered, startled by the sudden knock at the door.

A tired Nick came walking in, his head hung down at first but soon after looked up to see Luke casually lying on top his bed in his grey vest and matching jogging bottoms. Nick wore the same, but his trousers were a jet black, much like his hair colour. Luke could see that Nick's hair was a ruffled mess and his beloved hat was not present. Both his arms were also bandaged and altogether he looked exhausted.

"Nick, you okay?" Luke asked concerned as his friend carefully shut his door and slowly dragged his feet along to sit at the end of Luke's bed.

This was new…

Nick wasn't isolating himself like he did only this morning and the eleven days before...

"Can't sleep?" Luke asked as Nick just took a seat silently, not answering his original question.

"I want to…" Nick replied glumly.

He looked restless, just like Luke had guessed the moment he walked in.

"Same here…" Luke replied, staring at the other man's back as he was sitting facing away from him.

"I wouldn't of come in if you were sleeping… but I know that you don't like loud noises so I'd thought you be awake." Nick explained, this time sounding slightly more alive but still faced away from Luke, expression not changing.

"Well you guessed right!" Luke replied with a small smile on his face.

Nick ever so slowly turned around and weakly smiled at his friend.

It was a weak smile, but it was still a smile… Luke already felt relieved.

However, Nick's expression quickly changed when he noticed the side of Luke's face slightly bruised and one of his arms tightly bandaged.

Noticing the guilt washed over Nick's saddened face, Luke quickly reassured his friend before things went downwards again.

"Nick, hey… stop… please man…" Luke stammered, mentally kicking himself for his choice of things to say to his friend.

"I can't Luke…" Nick replied, sounding a lot more himself as he ran his fingers through his hair and pushed himself further onto Luke's bed so that he was almost sitting next to the brunette.

"Well you have to… you scare me when you're like this…" Luke explained… taken aback slightly as it's been the closest he'd been to Nick in a while.

Nick then properly looked up towards Luke, his blue eyes shining a bit more instead of looking grey and dull.

"Luke… I'm sorry, for everything… punching you, making you do… this." Nick explained pointing towards Luke's wrapped arm. His voice shook as Luke gently listened, not breaking eye contact for one second. Nick almost felt uncomfortable when it came to intense eye contact… but this was Luke. Somehow it felt different… it calmed him.

Just seeing Luke, his big brown eyes and his wavy light brown hair. His muscular arms… everything. It made Nick view him differently… He could not love him? Could he? After all, it's been 20 years of knowing Luke… why would feelings of love strike him now? In the damn apocalypse as well!

"Nick… don't be sorry… we've all had hard times and it just happened to strike you this time… and I know it's terrible, I do… but Nick, I just want you back… I miss you." Luke explained quietly while the black haired man silently took in his words, as if he was thinking every sentence through.

"I know Luke, I know… but I will always be here… for you, for everyone else… you're family." Nick almost whispered feeling slightly pleased that he got that off his chest.

Luke smiled.

"Good, now show that you will always be here… be the same happy Nick you once was… no matter how fucked up this world is." Luke explained while Nick edged closer to him, practically lying next to his friend, making Luke's cheeks burn up.

"Okay… yeah, I will." Nick replied, now sounding a lot more positive but still slightly unsure.

"Good… I missed you man." Luke chuckled, feeling extremely relieved that their conversations were starting to sound more normal instead of intense and intimidating.

Luke then sat up slightly and suddenly leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Nick's torso, almost immediately to be surrounded by the other mans warmth. His injured arm ached slightly due to the sudden movement, but he didn't care. Nick was finally coming back to him…

The hug took Nick by surprise at first, but he soon after returned it, by wrapping his achy arms around Luke's body like there was no tomorrow.

Finally, there was comfort. A comfort he longed for but was too afraid and broken to ask.

If shit happened again, Nick would no longer hide away and keep his feelings to himself… he would seek the comfort he wanted, in hope of getting it. Obviously Luke was willing to do that… that's what friends do.

Not too long afterwards, the two finally broke away from each other's hold and took a moment just to stare at each other.

Not realising the way that he was looking at his friend, Luke quickly blushed and looked away towards his window, letting out a small, embarrassed cough, as Nick also seemed to realise the way they were both staring at each other.

"I.. .uh sorry man, just please… um-" Luke looked down at Nick's arms.

"Please, don't cut yourself anymore… please Nick…" Luke said almost desperately, remembering what Nick had seemed to be doing for the past few days.

Nick looked down at his arms then back at Luke and smiled.

"I won't…" he whispered.

Luke smiled at his friend.

Finally…

He always knew there was a spark of hope in everyone.

"Thank you." Luke replied, almost whispering himself.

The two men were just sitting face to face, awkwardly just looking around, then to each other, and then gently smiling. The tension was burning Luke inside out.

"Besides, Pete's got our knives anyway…" Nick almost chuckled, speaking before Luke could continue what he was about to say.

"Yeah, he does." Luke chuckled back, remembering back to their Swiss army knives.

…

"Look, Nick… I…" Luke started to say…

"Yeah?" Nick asked, now curious.

"What is it?" Nick asked again as Luke replied with nothing but a sigh.

"It's been twenty years… but only now I've properly had the time to ya know… think things through…" Luke started to explain, twiddling his thumbs nervously.

"Yeah…?" Nick replied slightly confused.

"I do all this because I care… about you." Luke continues…

Nick's mouth forms into a small smile.

"Well that's what we've been doing for twenty years… lookin out for one another…" Nick replied.

"Yeah… but, um… I feel as if I care more… as in I don't know what to do without you…" Luke explains, now having the confidence to look up at Nick who was already looking back at him through his sapphire eyes.

"I don't know what I would do without you too…" Nick answers, with a warm smile.

Luke smiles gently, glad that Nick understood so far…

"I… I think I might love you…" Luke stammers, his eyes full of nothing but anxiety to what Nick's answer will be.

At first, Nick's eyes widen slightly, but he then relaxes his face, the corners of his mouth forming into a smirk.

"You think you love me?" Nick asks his friend, only now noticing how the candles light makes Luke's skin glow, beside the fact that one side of his face is slightly swollen due to this morning.

"I uh… well…" Luke started to say, nerves getting the better of him as he looked down at his hands.

"Would you change your mind if I said that I loved you back?" Nick questioned, bringing out his hand to tilt Luke's chin upwards.

"I… uh… yeah, it would…" Luke rambled out, trying hard not to let out a cry of happiness and relief also to the warm touch on his chin.

"Then in that case… I love you Luke… I, I always did." Nick explained, stuttering himself. Only feeling the nerves start to form as he spoke...

Luke smiled as Nick's cheeks started to fade into a crimson red colour...

"I love you too Nick."