Author's Note: Alrighty I'm back, sorry for the long wait, but this chapter couldn't be posted until my other story's next chapter was posted. If you get a sense of déjà vu, well it's because a good chuck of the two stories chapters are used in both stories, hence why this one had to wait utile the other one's chapter was finished being written. Might need some tissues towards the end just to warn you.
Days of Trouble Brings Days of Peace
Brandi spent a good part of the day between puking and napping when Beau did; trying to teach him how to walk; which she had managed to finish, though not even bothering to teach him how to talk, since Dustin asked her if he could teach Beau to talk. He had the want for it, and it would help him to get out of his red Aspiration, which she was all for doubly to help him get out of red Aspiration as well as to lessen the burden on her. So that just left like she had with Dustin, potty training, she had made some progress in potty training the boy, but not much. However, Beau was so not easily potty trained, unlike Dustin. In her state of mind of still getting over the shock and now pending worry of how they were going to do this now with another baby on the way and low finances, of just recently finding out she was pregnant caring Skip's last child. All in all simply put, she couldn't think straight. All Brandi knew between her frustrations and worry was Dustin was a little angel when it came to potty training he was so easy, one shot, full bladder, as far as being taught how to use the potty, he was all done. He just needed like most, a little help or a check with wiping when he had a poop. Dustin was quick to get it, though, just like that, he didn't even need Smart Milk and he was done, he even crawled over to the toilet and pointed to it, to let mother now he had to go. Sat on the potty for the transition it was smooth like butter, and Dustin was trained, and he was all done in one shot as if he had Smart Milk in his system. He also liked having a 'toilet' all to himself. Little Beau on the other hand was a bit too diaper trained. Hardest of all were poops he would hold it back, until he was in pain almost, but usually pees were fine with him. Dustin and Beau were similar and very different in that. Dustin even as a baby only had a BM every other day, which was normal for him. They came to find out Dustin used up most of what he ate, so he didn't need to do that as often, and his BM's were very normal when it did happen. Beau as a baby was doing it every day or more, but as soon as Beau had transitioned over to a toddler, he held them back when it came time to potty train him. So now like Dustin he was only going poop every other day or longer too now, but for completely different reasons. "Beau, just sit there, and relax and try; relax, give it a chance, see if something comes out. You have relax and to be patient sometimes, it will come out." She was sure he had to poop, but again he was probably holding it back.
Beau just struggled and wiggled off and screamed out the only word she was sure that he knew, "NO!" Crawling off Beau was grabbed and sat back down.
"Yes, you are going to learn how to use the potty. I asked you to do something, now obey me, and just sit on the potty," Brandi said gently, "that's all I want you to do. You don't have to go pee or poop in it if you don't have to go, that's fine if you don't have to go, but you will obey me and just sit on it, to practice. That's all I want, is for you to sit on the potty and practice for the sake of just having a practice to get used to using the potty. If you get off the potty before I tell you that you can, you will be punished. If you pee or poop your pants on purpose to defy or disobey me, yes you will be punished. Do you understand me?" Oh yes Beau understood that just fine he nodded, but Brandi knew Beau was just unhappy about it too, as he gave her a very dirty look. Then Beau screamed defiantly at mother's expectations, and pushed her, to see if she really meant it or not. Beau was very much testing her as much as she was testing him. "I mean it Beau, sit here for 2 minutes, and try to pee or poop. If you don't do anything, fine, but you're going to be back on here in 15 minutes to try again, and to practice." Beau just gave her that look; Brandi knew it then with that look, what Beau was probably going to do, try testing her. "I mean it Beau, stay on that potty, or I will punish you for disobeying me," she warned him, fully intent on following through, she had to.
Defiantly to disobey her, he screamed kicked, "No, no, no, no," and then standing up promptly he half squatted and peed on the floor giving her that dirty defying look and walked out and off to the hallway and right off towards the toy xylophone about to sit down and play with it.
"Oh no you don't, I told you what will happen if you disobeyed me, and got up before I let you and do something like that, on purpose," Brandi promptly scolded, and took the toy away from Beau. Now she had a way to get him to do what she wanted to do, what he should be doing. "You don't get this toy back until you are potty trained, and if you continue to be naughty, you won't get it back until you can use the potty on your own and can talk. You have to earn it back. This is your punishment, as well as a timeout. For not doing as you were told."
"No, no, no, no, mine!"
"I told you what would happen; so now you're being punished. So now, you won't get this toy back, until you earn it back. You're acting like a baby, and little baby's don't get to play with big boy toys, they stay in cribs," and with that she picked him up and put in the crib, "and besides you're in a timeout. Next time you do that on purpose, you will get a firm swat to your behind." Taking the toy she put it up on the dresser, in her bedroom, where Beau wouldn't be able to get at it, got the newspaper, and sat on the living chair to read it quietly while Beau does his timeout.
"No, no, potty, need potty now," trying to use potty training to try to get out of his timeout.
Knowing exactly what he was doing, "You don't have to go potty, don't lie, you went on the floor, on purpose, remember. Since I will not tolerate lies you will clean up the mess you made, as part of your punishment, for lying, and to take responsibility for your actions. Now be quiet, your timeout doesn't start until you're quiet."
Well, that was that, he knew there was a boundary, now, and had he hit it, hard, as he pouted, "Ohh, unh, mmn," and plopped sat down and the crib pouting, upset with himself, he had disappointed mother so, and quietly crying remorsefully, he did his timeout.
"That's a good boy," she said quietly as he settled down and took his punishment. When she had finished reading the article in the paper and she was sure Beau had learned his lesson and he was truly sorry for what he had done, she went over to the crib. "You know why you're in here, right?" Beau nodded. "Why are you in a timeout? Try to tell me." Babble mumbling, he pointed to his crotch then leaned over and pointed to the floor. "That's right you peed on the floor. Was it an accident?" Beau shook his head no and looked upset with himself about it. "So you did it to disobey what I asked you to do, and to test me to see if I was serious?" Beau nodded. "Are you also in here for another reason?" Beau nodded, and pointed to his lips. "That's right you lied to me as well, I will not tolerate any lies. Next time it happens, you will get a spanking and any other time after that you lie, you will be spanked. Do I make myself clear? No lying allowed, or you get a spanking." Beau nodded he got that rule. "Good, because that is one of the rules, no lying, Dustin gets the same, he knows too, he gets a spanking if he lies, and now you know that rule too. Good, now up you go, let's go clean up the mess you made on the bathroom floor." Without squabble about it, he was given toilet paper to mop up the puddle and was watched to make sure that he cleaned it well before he was handed a disinfectant wipe to finish cleaning it up after the puddle was moped up dry with toilet paper. Running the water warm in the sink Brandi helped Beau wash his hands. "Good and I loved your positive attitude as well too, good job." Scooping him in for a big hug, "All is forgiven I love you so much. Now as for going potty and going caca, I want to know, now that I had some time to think about it all. Are you just afraid of going caca?" Beau nodded. "Okay so are you afraid that you are losing a part of yourself when you caca?" Beau whined a bit, "Maybe a bit, well you are not. When you eat food you use the food you eat to help your body grow and make energy to play and learn but not all of it us used up, what's not used up comes out as poop as caca, you're not losing any bit of your body when you go caca. Caca is just the unused food you ate, same with pee-pee, it's just unused liquids you drink. Understand now?" He nodded. "Okay, now are you also afraid of it hurting when it comes out," he nodded vigorously, "well that's your fault there, for holding it in. You can't hold it in forever, you can't; it will come out. But the longer it is held in the more it will probably hurt. As soon as you need to go caca, you should go caca, and it won't hurt, but if you hold it in too long, it might make it hurt the next time it wants to try come out. Is that why you are holding it in?" Beau nodded. "Well, I might be able to help you out there, so it might not hurt so badly when it does come out. But after today there will be no excuses I will expect you to go caca when you have to go, no more holding it in, it's not good for you. If I catch you trying to do it holding it in other than to try to make it to the potty, in other words holding it in on purpose like you have been doing, to be naughty, you will be punished. Do you have to caca now?" He shook his head no. "Well go to the chair, and sit by it, while I'll get something to help your caca come out a bit easier." She was checking to see if Beau was complaint and now obedient and had learnt his previous lesson on the importance of obedience, Brandi nodded in approval happy he got that lesson as he toddled off to the chair and sat by it. Grabbing 2 cotton balls and 2 Q-Tip's and big the container of Vaseline, Brandi came out of the bathroom. "Good boy for listening to mommy. That's what I like to see." Getting some olive oil from the cupboard Brandi soaked a cotton ball and a Q-Tip with it. "Get your pants down and your diaper down or off for me, and then I can help you. You're not getting a spanking, I'm just going to help you caca or make it easier to caca when you do have to go caca." Not having a clue but Beau nodded and he pulled down his pants and wiggled his diaper down to his ankles. "Now this might be a little bit uncomfortable but it will help to soften up your poop, so it's a little easier to push out." Sitting on the chair, she handed Beau the Vaseline container and the other cotton ball and Q-Tip. "Hold that, for me, I'll need that in a minute or two. Up you go," picking him up and putting him over her lap and took the olive oil soaked cotton ball first and put it up his rectum slightly. Beau whined out and wiggled a bit not liking this. "I know you don't like it, I don't like it much either, but it's your fault for holding your caca in, this is what happens. I don't like this either, but it has to be done. This will help you to caca and to make it a bit softer so it's a little less painful when it comes out, but maybe you'll learn for next time not to hold it in. I meant what I said Beau, I catch you purposely holding your caca in, you will be punished. There are no more excuses for that."
"Oh, no, no," he whined.
"You have been warned; that's that, don't do it, don't hold you caca in, on purpose, and you won't be punished, simple as that. If you have to pee or caca let me or Dustin know and we'll help you right away and put you on the potty, and help you out."
"Oh me," he whined but he got it. How sneaky, mama knew, she knew, and she also knew why, there was no hiding it now, he had no choice now but to comply and obey, lest he be chastised.
"Oh me, oh me what," Beau just whined uncomfortably understanding perfectly it seemed that he had gotten himself into this, uncomfortable, situation. More so as the cotton ball was rolled around a bit up his rectum, and whined the, 'oh me' again, that he was quiet uncomfortable. "Oh well, that's too bad," she said as she couldn't stifle the almost satisfied smile, it was funny and yet it wasn't. She had just taken out the cotton ball and was going use the olive oil soaked Q-Tip up there when Dustin came out of his room.
"What are you doing, a spankin'?"
"No, but the next time he holds his caca in, on purpose like he's been doing, he will get one."
"Not good to hold it in, bud. Ooh give me a little dab of that," spotting it in Beau's hands and opens it up about to put a finger in the Vaseline container he smiled. "Got to make my lips kiss-ably soft, for my girl," he said and made a kissing sound as he took the container and smelled it. "Ooh that is what I smell. I'll smell like a baby, but that's alright with me, I like it, I'm sure Angela will love it."
Brandi snapped, something about Angela just turned her, the wrong way, and it sure wasn't just what happened in the past, though that was a big part of it though. "Wait, that was Angela that came over here the other day," Dustin nodded, "are you're sure," Dustin nodded, "you're friends with Angela Pleasant, and not her twin sister, you're sure you know what one is which?"
"Yes, I can tell them apart now, it's not hard to figure out. Why?"
"In that case, since it is Angela, and not her nice sister, you're planning to plant one on, you can just forget it, you are so not kissing Angela Pleasant. Angela Pleasant is nothing more than a big nasty manipulative vile little monster; and I for one will not have you, corrupted, by her!"
"Whoa, what, corrupted, from a little kiss, my first kiss, corrupted, seriously," if you couldn't tell already, he was disbelieving, his mother, would even suggest such a thing, over an innocent little first kiss with Angela, let alone what she called her.
"Oh it's not just the kiss, Dustin; it's what is leading up to and after that first kiss, especially after it. No, I forbid it; I don't want you to even see her."
"You can't do that! That's not fair!"
"Yes I can, I am your mother, and I just did! I forbid you to see her, aside from school, I forbid it, for our own good until you see what I see, I forbid you to see Angela. If I find out you snuck out to go see her I will tear into that behind. I mean it, I forbid it, I don't even really want you to even talk to her," throwing her hands up and shaking her head. Brandi sighed out deeply and she said the sensible obvious thing to her son, as she used his nickname with it to try to get him to realize what she saw, "Dusty, love is blind."
"You are so mean! Yes, I know that's what they say love is blind, but it is you who are blind! Can't you see I love her, I have to…" Trying to find the right words to express it, his want, his desire, in his desperation, that he had to kiss her, nothing came to him, it was empty, a hollow want. It was just his Aspiration desperate to get him out of this red funk, which had rolled up that want. But still he wanted to kiss her, kiss the girl, but he was blinded. Deep down though it wasn't Angela he was in longing for, to kiss. It was someone else, he was just blinded by what he thought was love, out of fear. His mother saw that, plain as day.
"I'm not being mean to you. I know what's best for you. I love you so much, I know it seems mean, unfair, and harsh, whatever you want to call it, but I'm only doing what is right, to try to protect you. You have to trust me, you just don't see what I see," Brandi just sigh groaned loudly, her heart ached to see him so upset, about to cry, she knew how hard of a blow that must be to be forbidden to see her. "Get what you want out of there, if you must," catching Dustin on off eyeing the container of Vaseline, figuring he might still want it for his lips or for his hands or something like that, "I'm putting some of it up Beau's behind to help soften his stool and stimulate him maybe to go."
"Ewww," she held up the olive oil soaked Q-Tip, "still, ewww," and he got a huge gob of it as she inserted the Q-Tip up her youngest son's anus.
"Oh like you need that much put half of that back."
"I think I do need that much."
"For your lips, and maybe your hands, no, put half that Vaseline back."
"Not for my hands, although I'll rub it in," but before she could protest that he put some of the Vaseline back in the container, he squished it in his hands and rubbed them together and into his skin with glops of it all over his hands, then rubbed a bit of it on his lips.
"Seriously, you didn't need that much for just your hands and lips, you're playing with it."
"It's not just for my hands," wandering off towards his room, "soft like a baby's bottom," and put his hands down his pants and on his behind, and rubbed. Dustin made a goofy face as if he was really, really enjoying it too much.
Brandi raised an eyebrow then rolled her eyes, knowing he was messing around and it made her almost laugh, "What are you doing?"
"Rub it in, rub it in, rub it in, feels so good, to rub it in, oooh yeah, oooh rub it in rub it in, rub it in. I donno, being silly I guess, and a little, cheeky. I think rather you spank me than forbid me to see Angela, I really want see her," Dustin said hoping to try change her mind about this or be a little more lenient. Pulling his bottoms down a bit exposing his butt, but considering his long Llama's jersey it being so long it didn't show, as he rubbed the Vaseline more into his behind.
"I'll say, cheeky is right, tisk. Don't push it Dustin, I'm not talking a little tap to the bottom, on this one, I mean you won't sit comfortably for a good long while. Why are you putting it on your butt? Now you got greasy behind and pants or at least undies."
"Do I? Oh, a greasy butt, and undies, let me check," and took that opportunity to casually slip into his room, where he could have a tad bit of privacy to put the Vaseline where he actually wanted it applied, what was left of it; which was on his chest and belly, and a bit down his legs. He didn't know what to feel on the fact he was forbidden to see Angela, it was too unreasonable. It was just like Adam and Eve, in the Garden of Eden, in some sense. Yes, and we all know what happened there. God said that they were forbidden to eat the fruit, for a good reason, it really was for their own good, only they chose to disobey and well, he knew the rest. So if that was the case, here, what was mom saying, that Angela was the snake, the devil, the deceiver…? Perhaps, as his mind slowly wandered back, then he stopped, and he shook his head and that thought out.
Now she was getting a tad suspicious, he was acting weird; he was in there a bit too long to just be checking his pants unless he was changing his underwear. "Dusty, what, what are you doing, are you changing you greasy undies? What were you doing your room earlier, before you came out?" She was about to get up and check to see what he was up to in there, when he came back out, still working it in, but on his arms a bit.
Lost in thought, "Huh, what, what was I doing, oh what was I doing in there, earlier, oh I was doing my homework."
"Really," it was a little suspicious, and suspicious sounding, that Dustin was actually doing his homework, especially without being told to do so, considering his failing grades, not unless that stern lecture she gave him sunk in.
"Really," almost half mocking, because she doubted him he was telling her the truth.
That was a shock so she had every right to disbelieve him without the proof, "Dustin, you doing your homework, without being told to do it?"
"Oh I know, shocking isn't, it call the media, call the presses, Dustin Broke did his homework, without being told for once. I hate school, I hate school, I hate school, public school royally sucks, but at least I did my homework," he said almost a bit singsong like. Brandi just shook her head and looked up smiling for a few seconds nearly rolling her eyes at him. "What not happy, gee I thought you would be celebrating." Nothing, not even a congratulatory smile now, or good job, or I'm so proud of you, no kiss, no nothing, it figures, it just figures, I try to do one thing right, and nothing. Well whatever I better get used to it, she wouldn't be too happy in a few days when I flunk out. Dustin was hoping to at least get something like a hug, before that happened. Before she flipped her lid and grounded him till College, oh right, considering what he was doing, he wouldn't be getting in College, at all let alone into Private School like he wanted. Not that she seemed to care all that much anymore, nope too busy with Beau to give a crap about him anymore. Yes, he knew he needed training, learning his sills, but she never had time for him anymore, they used to talk chat a lot, snuggled together on the bed, because they didn't have a couch to do that on. Just a hug, a freaking hug, that's all he wanted right now, is a hug, but she couldn't even get that through her thick head. Hug Beau forget the older child, who spent his whole life with his dad, and remembers him, and is in pain right now, and go console a toddler who barely had 2 years with the guy, and realistically, will probably hardly remember him in a few years. No, let's not go console that child who was is hurting, who hit rock-bottom Aspiration, grew up badly, and now faces his teen years without dad around to guide him in the guy aspect of his teenage years. Who was going to teach him how to shave now, or what to expect in the next few years? He didn't know too much about puberty just that he will be going though it soon, if he wasn't already. Yes, oh but by all means, let's pay all your attention to the toddler who barely cried for more than an hour after dad had died, but gets all the consoling, but the near teen and now teenager gets nothing nada nothing, not even a hug, when he does his homework without being asked for once! He tried to not let it show as he slipped back in his room before those biting tears became a bit too obvious. Suck it up just suck it up, he told himself, not like she cared right now with Beau and now the new baby on the way. He wanted a hug so badly a long mommy loves you so much, hug right now, but the last thing he wanted right now was a hug, as he touched his stomach and shuddered in pain. Praying in French it was the closest thing he could do to pray 'in tongues' after he quietly prayed for the Vengeance of God be done in this matter. "You're sick, and I hate you, for what you did to me. You're so evil you're nothing but evil. You're a bully. Jesus I forgive him, he doesn't deserve it, and I'm still very angry for what he did to me, but I'll forgive the big bully. But I have to say this, if anyone who does that to a child what he did to me deserves nothing but to be shaking in his or her boots, as he feels Your terrible rebuke Wrath and Vengeance, for it is You who has to do all that not me. He is in Your capable Hands now Lord, so do with him as You will. You know if he will ever get saved, if he will ever repent, or if he will ever change not me. I pray that he does get saved, but hope he does not escape for his wrongdoing to me. In that I pray, avenge me, God, avenge me, deal with him as You see fit, please let him be caught and also be punished. Far be it better here and now rotting in jail for all his crimes as he such deserves, with hope, he might repent, and I pray that he will, far better that, then him having to pay for it for all eternity, rotting in Hell. I forgive him, like Steven said, don't hold Gordon accountable for his sins, he doesn't get it what he's doing, besides I forgive him. As far as I'm concerned and can tell the guy is demon possessed and therefore wasn't completely his fault." Though Dustin was justly angry as he said it, he still had prayed the perfect thing the perfect prayer to have it done to Gordon King, to be caught and be punished for all his crimes, sins, and wrongdoings and delivered and saved. Then fell to his knees out of desperation unable to take it anymore he needed help, he didn't know what to do now anymore. Quietly, and in French, "I don't want to be in this job. I hate it. God, You know if I had known…oh if I only knew ahead of time… I would have never… Tell me what to do, God, oh please, tell me, or have someone, anyone, just tell me what to do. All I want to do is to do something good; or to maybe try helping someone out, to try to make a difference in someone's life, to help someone out. I just feel absolutely worthless right now. Like no one cares, certainly not my mother, certainly not right now it seems, I hate this; I hate it. I want things to change." He knew he was a good boy, he always tried his best to do his best what he should, but now it didn't seem like it was enough, anymore everything was just wrong. Not to mention just plainly confusing as heck now. Dustin was being fed way too many of the enemy's lies and now believing too many of them. Sniffling Dustin tried to be quiet, about it, he could hear Beau whine uncomfortably. "Please help my brother to poop to have a caca and it not hurt him to go poop caca, or at least not so bad that he foolishly tries to hold them back like he's been doing," he quietly pray asked.
Well God intervened, as Beau sensed it something was terribly wrong with his big brother, he looked up pouting and whined and looked over at the door. Between the cotton ball and Q-tip stuck up his butt and now something wrong with Dustin, he had had quite enough! "Aaaaaah, no, no, n-o-o-o, unh, mmn!" and wiggled and fused to be let down. Rather than what he wanted, he was hugged and cuddled. "No," and screaming loudly he looked at the door. No, not me Dustin, Dustin, he thought, how could he get through to her, or at least get her to let him down so he could see what was wrong. Can't lie, spanking. Want to learn to talk! Have that want too. Dustin said he would teach me how to talk, mommy said so too, after school. When is after school? I want to learn how to talk; I can't do that right now so well. Screaming loudly and pointing to the door then he smiled, he knew how he could get Dustin out of his room, he would have to, if mama made him. Oddly, what she had done had made that need arise. Despite the pain that he might ender getting it out, he took it, the opportunity, as it presented itself, to help out his older brother, "Potty!" Hey, I said a new word, yay for me!
"Oh it worked great, thank you for telling me, I'll take you. And you said a new word and now that you know that word, you can say it, when you need to pee or caca. Let's go potty, I'll help you."
Yes, just what he wanted to hear. "NO! Uh," and pointed to the door, "Duh, Duh, no mmm no ma, no mama, no, Duh potty."
"Dustin you want to Dustin to take you to the potty?"
Nodding, "Duh, Duh," pointing to the door, trying to say Dustin, or Dusty, 'Duh' was about the closest thing to his name he could get, right now.
"Okay," promptly to the door, she opened it; there Dustin was staring out the window at the pool, with an empty look on his face, what she caught as he looked partly over when she entered the room. She knew, he was probably upset right now, but didn't know why for sure, if he was just sad, and missed his dad, and finally ready to cry, or more likely just sulking over the fact he was forbidden to see Angela. "Beau, he wants you to take him the potty."
"I heard," he said husky, so much that it surprised him, so it was obvious now he was, and was about to cry again, and bit his lip, in a mere futile attempt to hold back his tears. Why did it have to be so hard? Why? He was so angry he just wanted to scream, to punch the wall, to go punch Gordon, to scream like Beau did, to throw a big temper tantrum, anything. If he could trade places right now with Beau, for 5 just 5 measly minutes, to be held, the one being held in her arms right now. Back to being a toddler, back to being held in mom's arms like that. Back to when dad was still alive, or back to the time that his mom understood him without him having to say it, he was hurt or hurting, she just knew, intuitively. Okay, realistically 15 minutes, 5 minutes was cutting it too short. Guess she doesn't care, maybe she doesn't even want me around anymore, maybe that's why she distanced herself like she did, and now is just being a mean old hag, the rotten vile evil lying thoughts raced in. Dustin paused for 10 seconds, before he turned around, long enough for him to get angry rather than stay sad and upset.
"Uhm maybe show him how it's done too, just, s-i-t, when he's older, you can show him that." She paused as she tried to assess what he was feeling, why he was obviously upset; as he continued to stare out his window blankly, as she shook her head. "Beau needs to go, Dustin, now. Look, if you're upset with me forbidding you to see Angela, well, get over it, already," in some strange way she really was looking for it, the reason, and wanting the big blow out, for all the tears, all the anger, something, anything, to get them to talk, for him to tell her what was wrong. For him to open up, like he used to do, to be able to tell her anything, before, Skip, died. He was holding it back, holding it in, and it was eating up, from the inside out, she could see it, so she had hoped it would help hit his breaking point. But that look she got that empty stare filled with hopelessness, and underlying anger as Dustin turned around, muttering something under his breath. It took her mind a few seconds to refocus, to realize what he said; and longer to translate it, long enough that Dustin was in the bathroom by then, with the door locked. "Shut up and that's not the problem you have with me at the moment. What's wrong with you Dusty, and what happened to my nice outgoing sweet little boy, who could tell me any and everything?" Scanning the room, she pulled open his schoolbag and sighed deeply. "Oh, Dustin, why, why did you do this?"
"Tais-toi, tais-toi, ce n'est pas le problème que j'ai avec toi en ce moment," Dustin said half quietly. Turning around he grabbed Beau out of her arms and frowning he stormed off to the bathroom. Dustin pulled down Beau's pants and pretty much tore off his diaper tossing it angrily onto the floor before stomping on it. "Stupid diaper, you don't need it. If you wet your pants a few times you will begin to detest it, besides you're a big boy and big boys don't need or wear diapers they wear big boy underwear. On the potty, there you go. Tuck you penis in, in case you have to pee as well, that's right. Go potty try to poop caca. I'll go potty with you on the big potty." Dustin tucked himself in as well, as he looked over at Beau as he sat on his potty trying to move his bowels while he sat on the toilet, slowly trickling away, and in deep thought. Dustin still wanted to teach Beau to talk, he had that want, still locked, especially now, it had to stay locked; now that mom made it so he wasn't allowed to go see Angela. She couldn't do that to him, at least not without giving him a chance to say bye or tell her he wasn't allowed to see her now, except in school, it was too much just to cut her off like that without an explanation at least. She even got to point she wanted him to cut her off completely from his life, not even talk to her at all, even at school. Mom just couldn't do that, not without letting him go explain to Angela why they weren't allowed to see each other anymore. Hey, yeah, maybe if he explained that to mom, maybe he could, go see her and sneak in that kiss. He sat there for over 2 minutes thinking it out and flicked the lock between those 2 big wants, kiss Angela, teach Beau to talk, couldn't he do both? It wasn't just the fear of the thrashing his behind would receive, if he did dare to try disobey her, he didn't want to lose her trust or to disappoint mother, period. It was bad enough that they had gotten estranged as it is already, he didn't want to make it worse. Dustin looked over at Beau, who pouted at him then smiled at his older brother, seemingly sensing the emotional distress he was under. He locked the want on teaching his brother to talk, and nodded. No, family first, besides if, like she said, she really loved him, and it really was out of love, that she forbade it, there must be a good reason for it. Maybe if he got up the guts he could ask her and try to get into, why, besides her up and forbidding they see each other. Besides he really didn't need to kiss Angela, since there was yet another big want, he had, to get into Private School. "Can't get in, nope," Dustin whispered, realizing it, there was no point, in it now, to consider locking that other want down, since it was too late today to try phone the Headmaster up to try get in, and besides, "not without failing first, if I'll ever get in after that. Not now, no, no I can't, I can't get in, not probably ever." Stomping angrily Dustin's pants and underwear dropped to his ankles, "Ugh!" He was fuming as he pulled his pants and undies back up a bit over his knees from his ankles, and covered back up big dark bruises on his legs, reminded of why he wouldn't be able to get into Private School, why he was angry and also very frightened to death at the same time. He pretended to be so brave, he wasn't; he was nothing but a big coward.
Beau grunted too, wanting to give up after trying to push it out, it was hurting and he didn't like it, "Ugh, unh, mmm, hmm-uh-unh, no, no, no, me no caca, no, no," then cried in pain as he stood up ready to give up. Beau spotted that huge bruise on his leg as Dustin rubbed it groaning like he was in pain. That was it, why he was upset, maybe.
"Ohh bud that's what happens when you hold it in, come on try again, just try again, try to push it out, push, that caca out. It might hurt for a few seconds but then it will be out, and you'll feel much better. Maybe try squatting a bit." Beau looked at him funny. "You know how to squat; I've seen you do it lots of times, just squat right over your potty, like you're about to sit-down on it." He was going to stand up and help show him, but Beau bounced a bit as he got over Dustin's old now his potty-chair and slowly lowered himself down. "Yes that's squatting, go down, down, down, yup that's squatting. Try going poop try go caca like that; it will make it easier to poop it out. You have to go poop I have to go pee, still, let's go potty together, it's fun," trickling away, finishing up his on-off pee while Dustin waited for his brother to try poop. It was then he caught Beau just staring at it, the big shoe shaped bruise on his upper left thigh. Then Beau pointed to it quivered his bottom lip, then looked up at him, trying to ask the question, as tears of sympathy came out. "Yeah that's part of it, why I'm upset yes, that is it, the reason. Just don't say anything okay, I'm fine, it's not so bad." But Dustin wasn't as he winced and jolted slightly as he touched it, it hurt so badly, along with the other ones he had on his body, it wasn't just his legs, his belly, and back probably, had a few there too, only his arms and head were spared from the same beating. Wow what a professional Gordon King was, yup, bruising him up everywhere it wasn't visible, how, professional; the bully.
Dustin you're hurt, "No."
"I'm fine; really, it's not that bad anymore."
"No. No, Duh, no, Duh no, no," you are not fine don't lie to me. It's a rule no lies. Oh, that looks like a big bad booboo to me, a big owie. Why are you lying to me, why, I don't understand why would you lie to me? "Duh no, no," pointing to his lips, "no," then to the door, "mama ow Duh, no," pointing to his lips, "umm ma, na-aa uhh mal mu-ah-uh."
Despite the age gap, he seemingly understood exactly what Beau was asking and telling him, despite his baby talk and gibberish, "Mal, yes mal, that's French, mal means evil or bad, in French, and you're right it is bad evil to lie. I know I will get a spanking an, ow, if I do lie." But I am lying I will be lying if I say it's not as bad as it seems. I'm lying to you, what's the difference, no difference, if I lie to you, mom, or to anyone else, for that matter, a lie is a lie, and if I do that, then I deserve that spanking.
He pouted and pointed to Dustin, "Unh, umm, mal Duh, mal, mal, ugh," pointing to himself, "mal, mal Duh mal, no, mal, no." It was coming out poop, and so was the truth.
"Alright, alright you're right, I can't fool you. I'm not okay, is that what you want to hear? It hurts okay, the booboo is as bad as it looks, or worse, probably way worse," he sniffled turning his face away from his little brother very ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't lie to you either. I'm so sorry I tried to lie to you. I didn't mean to, I'm just so scared. That's why I tried to lie. I'm afraid. I just don't want anyone to know. Something bad happened to me, and well. I just, I just can't talk to mommy, not anymore, not since daddy died; I just can't. It's so hard now," he choked as he tried very futilely to not cry, as he teared over and rubbed his face smudging the makeup off. "I don't know what happened, everything it, it just changed, maybe because I became a teenager, I don't know. All I know is I can't tell her anything, important, anymore. Nothing is the same anymore; we used to be so close, now… Everything changed, everything. It's like, I don't know her anymore. So, I can't tell her about this, and I'm so afraid. Your big brother is just a big coward."
Upset too, upset that Dustin was upset and sad; Beau sniffled too, but understood how much things changed when Skip died. Yes, they were close and although he loved all the attentions he was receiving no doubt about it, he also knew he had to share, and he didn't want to fight. Beau understood enough how scary things can be, after all he was terrified of the sound the big potty or toilet made, that was very scary that sound. So it was reasonable to assume that even older big brothers get frightened sometimes, but maybe he could help. He wasn't afraid to talk to mama. If you can't, I will, I can help. You need a big hug too. Beau quivered his bottom lip at his older brother, to say sorry, for what he was about to do, "Aaah, ma, ma, mama, ma, mama," Beau screamed loudly and screech screamed! Besides he had another reason to get her in here now, it came out he had done it, Dustin's advice to squat made the caca come right out, and it didn't hurt too! Maybe now he will have earned that toy back, maybe.
"Aaah Beau stop, stop it, no don't, stop that," he groaned covering his ears, as his high voice was amplified in the bathroom as it echoed loudly off the walls. Dustin quickly realized what Beau had done, Beau wanted mom to come in here; he did it purposely too! Not to get him in trouble, like he thought at first, but to help him.
Rattling the doorknob, "Dustin, Dustin Mathew Broke, you open this door right now!"
Dustin glared at his brother, who smiled back at him. "Uhh, I can't ma, I'm on the toilet right now!" Beau gave him a dirty look, and then Dustin caught a whiff of the stink. "Well I am, don't give me that look. I'm on the toilet that's what this is called the toilet or big potty. I'm busy; I'm on the big potty! I can't get up right now, I'm a little busy in here."
"I'm sure you are, but you can't tell me that it takes you that long to go pee; if it did, you would have been dancing, or crossing, before you got in there. And besides, I know you're not doing the other job, since you did that last night, and you only do that every other day. You're not due for your next movement, until sometime tomorrow, late afternoon early evening. So quit your stalling and open this door! Now. Open this door right now!"
Damn, she did know, she did know him well, she had him pegged. Beau looked up at him and giggled as he pointed to the door. "Oh you're funny, hilarious." You did that on purpose didn't you, I know you did. I don't know if I should be grateful or angry. Pulling up his pants and undies partly up he smiled; he could stretch this out just a little longer, yes. He stalled by doing something both unusual especially for a boy his age, but also something, that he usually didn't do after using the toilet, with the exception of when he moved his bowels, he hardly ever after a pee, washed his hands. "Okay, but I'll be a bit still, because I'm wiping myself clean and dry," taking his time to do that, delicate, task. Hey, he forgot how nice that felt to not have that wet patch on his underwear, as he pulled up his undies and didn't get that lingering big drop that always came when he did that. And hey, if it saved him from that big wet patch and therefore probably smelling like pee, and therefore a day or two from changing his undies, and therefore, bathing, so much the better with his hydrophobia and all. Sure Dustin liked to be clean, but he hated baths and bathing in general now, something that he did like when he was younger. But ever since dad died, and seeing his dead body floating it their pool, well…it was to be expected. Now that he was a teenager, he would prefer to leave all of his bathing instances, to the bathroom, or if so bravely inclined, the kitchen, sink. "Now I'm flushing the toilet, the big potty," Dustin narrated. "You don't have to be afraid of the sound the toilet or big potty makes; it's just the sound it makes as it eats your pee-pee, caca, and toilet paper, yummy, yummy, mmm, yummy! Thank you for feeding me, oh I was so hungry, and yay you used me, I want to be your friend, hear me cheer whoosh-whoosh," he said in a deep very silly cheerful happy voice! Beau jolted up slightly and smiled and clapped his hands suddenly unafraid from just seconds ago before the toilet was even flushed.
Brandi rolled her smoky grey blue eyes she couldn't believe that, let alone he said that, Dustin probably hadn't wiped himself on the front end since he was a toddler young child, which at that point it was her idea and view for extra practice on wiping, for the back end, more so than just a hygienic practice. Brandi had figured he hadn't bothered to do that at all, or much at all, no, not since he was 5 when Skip showed him how to pee standing up, and how to shake it dry. She gave it a few seconds but still there was no movement or sound like he was coming over to unlock the door. "Right now, Dustin. I'm happy to hear you still wipe, your front end, but open the door already." Of course Brandi couldn't object to Dustin's creativity in making Beau unafraid of the sound the toilet made, that was a clever idea he had, as she chuckled and waited a few seconds as Dustin stalled a bit more.
"I can't open the door yet, I'm still busy. Now, I'm washing my hands. See I'm washing my hands, Beau; it's very important after going potty whether it's the big potty or the little potty. It's very important to do this, to wash your hands. Then you dry them, now I'm drying my hands, on the towel, see, drying my hands. Now I'm opening the door."
"Or, or tor," Beau repeated.
"Door yes that's right, door, that's the door."
Getting it right, to say it right, "Door!"
"He's got it, door, that's the door."
"Great, a new word for Beau, now do you mind telling me what you were doing in here." She was about to ask why he was stalling. But not only did Dustin speak up but she saw his face and his eyes were a bit red, like he was crying more evidently so, with the makeup on his face smudged and rubbed off in a few places. He was probably embarrassed to be caught crying, trying to be brave for his little brother and not cry in front of him, how silly. Or, rather not cry in front of her, more than likely. Dustin hardly cried for his father, at all, now maybe he finally was, finally. How could she console him when he hardly cried or looked like he was upset in any way? She couldn't. She wouldn't.
"We were going potty together like you asked; I was going pee and well Beau uh…"
"Mama, mama me caca, caca," getting up from his squat pointing to the job in the potty he did!
"Hey he did it! You went caca, great job," cheered Dustin, voice suddenly getting that first hint it was starting to change as he went a bit breathy as Dustin eyed that big load in the potty, that smelled something nasty. "I knew I smelled something nasty, guess it wasn't a quiet toot." Huh, I did pray he would easily poop, I don't suppose, but I just told him to squat, I didn't do anything special, did I?
"You did do it, wonderful," and tickled him. "And I bet you feel wonderful now to have all that caca out of you," Beau nodded, he did indeed feel a whole lot better.
"Sometimes I wish I could poop more than once every other day, because I sure do feel great at after I do the big job." Lending a hand, he got some toilet paper. Hopefully Beau would forget or be distracted long enough to forget, same with his mom. "Here, time to teach him how to wipe."
"Thanks, now, why was he screaming in here, for me?"
"Uh well, I guess to show you what he did, maybe."
"No Duh. Yes caca Duh uhh-uhh-mmm, uhh mal," and pointed to his leg as he got his behind wiped. Groaning, "No, no, mama, no, mal," moaning as his butt was wiped.
"Here, like this," taking the other chunk of toilet paper, Dustin handed her and helped to guide Beau to try wipe his own butt, "that's it, that's how you wipe your butt, after you have a caca. Keep trying, you'll get good at it. Why does he keep saying mal for? And why did you lie to me about doing your homework, Dustin? I looked in your backpack and in your room and I couldn't find it."
"He was babbling and out popped mal, so I said it means bad evil in French, which it does." He really didn't want to have this discussion with her right now.
"Mmn, mmm, mama, Duh ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, mal," and pointed to Dustin's leg.
"What is he doing and saying?"
"Um, maybe because he seen me wipe my penis maybe he wants to wipe dry his, extra practice for the back end, like you did with me." Beau just glared at him. "It is, it's good practice for learning how to wipe your own butt. That's what mom did with me, because I only poop every other day, that way I get to practice a bit more until I did caca then I would wipe by myself and mom or dad, would check to see if I did a good job wiping. That extra practice really helped. Plus my undies were always nice and dry, because I didn't have any pee-pee drops going down in my underwear; the toilet paper wiped me clean and dry."
Taking 3 squares of the toilet paper, she helped guide Beau to do this primarily himself because only he would know how comfortable or uncomfortable that would be. "Yes; and, your butt will be getting some practice in too, in learning not to lie, if you don't tell me where your homework is, if you even did it, so I can check it. If you actually even did it, at all, which obviously you didn't, and lied to me about it. I was going give you a hug, for doing your homework and make your favorite treat, if you had done it, because you did it without being asked. Honesty, the way you said it was a bit suspicious, at first, and I wanted to see it, to be sure, before I rewarded you with making some crêpes for dinner. I also want to know why you're failing. Do you not understand what the teacher is trying to teach you? Is it too much homework? I want to know. You know better, you know that you're not supposed to lie, so why did you?"
Oh no, I was wrong, she just didn't believe me, because I was lost in my thoughts and almost didn't hear her, I guess it did sound a bit suspicious now that I think about it. Oh great so much for those crêpes, my life is nothing, I just can't do anything right, nothing at all. "I was just, lost in my thoughts when you asked me. I did do it; I did my homework, without being asked, for good reason."
"Oh and what would that be, because my lecture sunk in?"
"That; and I figured if I did it without you asking me, you wouldn't check it, or ask for it, if it was done, if I said it was done."
"You're failing school, Dustin; of course I'm going to check it, every time, until you pull your grades up, now where is it, or did you just lie to me, again, about it, doing it?"
I have to fail I just have to fail, there's no other way; otherwise…I can't let that happen. "Just get it over with," he yelled and ran to his room. She was at least a good 2 minutes before she came in probably helping Beau out with learning how to wipe, and emptying out the potty. It gave him time to think, time to reason it out. Just take it and be done with it, I did try to lie to Beau, I'll gladly take the spanking for that, I deserve it for trying to lie to him. But she can't know, she won't understand, why I'm failing, why I have to fail.
Crying loudly and unhappily and very ashamed of himself for what he did, and afraid of the big pending punishment spanking that he knew was coming. Still he told his father the truth, that he had broken the window, playing ball too close to the house. He was so afraid, it was an accident, but he was still frightened of the trouble that he knew he was going to be in, but rather than being yelled at, or even spanked, he got a hug, when he told daddy the truth. "Dustin I love you, and I'm so proud of you for telling me the truth. Sometimes it takes a lot of courage and bravery to admit the truth. It's not always easy," Skip said as he lifted his son's chin up as tears fell down his cheeks. "I won't punish you for this, but you will have to work a little harder to earn some extra allowance so part of it can go to help pay for replacing the window you broke. Oh and Dustin the next time that you want to play ball, maybe play it a little less close to the house, so you won't accidently break another window. Now let's go carefully help clean up that mess. Just pick up the big pieces of glass; we'll get the smaller ones, so you don't cut your hands."
"Why did you lie to me," she asked softly as she entered into her eldest son's room. He was sobbing pretty loudly when she entered and Beau toddled in after her.
"I was afraid to tell Beau the truth; I was so scared I'm still so scared."
"What?"
"I tried to lie to say it wasn't as bad as it seems, but it is, I told him that it is as bad as it seems, if not worse. He knew I was trying to lie, but I told him the truth, that it was as bad as it seems, worse. That's why he keeps saying mal, and pointing, he seen them while we went potty together." Little Beau looked up at his older brother and smiled. "The truth is; I'm nothing but a coward. I can't do anything right. Because I'm stupid, I'm not good at anything."
"How dare you, Dustin Mathew Broke how dare you say such awful things about yourself; that are so far from the truth, how dare you. You are smart; you know more things than I do."
"But it's true; I'm not that smart, I never was, I'm so useless."
"You are not. Your brother in his own way told me you helped him poop. Is that true or not?"
"What did I do that was so special, I told him to squat, so what. It's how you're supposed to do it, to go to the bathroom"
"He pooped, that's what. Did he do it before he squatted?"
"No. Sniff, I just…prayed for him that he would do it without pain, while I was in my bedroom while you were trying to help soften his stool. I prayed he would be able to go and go with little to no pain, so he wouldn't foolishly try holding it in like he's been doing."
"You prayed for him to poop, and guess what, God answered that prayer. Was Beau in pain trying to poop siting," Dustin nodded, "but when you advised him to squat to try to poop that way what happened, was he in pain?"
"He pooped, he went caca, and no he wasn't."
"God answered that prayer through your advice. I didn't even think of that. I wouldn't have even thought of suggesting squatting, but you did. Guess what, God used you, to speak some wisdom into your little brother, to help him out."
"Me, really, I helped."
"Yeah you really, you helped, big time. Come on, Dustin, little things like that do make big differences in the world. Maybe you don't see it but I can. What if you didn't do that, what would have happened?"
"I, guess he would keep holding it in give up trying to poop too much pain, and…"
"Constipation and worse problems, not to mention my no choice left in punishing him, like I said I would. But your advice fixed the problem he was having. Your silliness fixed the other problem he had, he was frightened of the toilet, of the sound it made, but you showed him it wasn't anything to be afraid of."
"I…I did pray I could help someone make a difference…"
"You did you made a big difference in you little brother's life and you'll make an even better greater difference by showing him your faith in God, just like Skip showed you, when you were little, teaching you how to pray."
"Little buddy," Dustin sniffled, bending down, and picking him up, "I prayed you would be able to poop, go caca, without pain, God He answered that prayer through me, when I suggested to you to squat to caca; it worked. It may not always be through you when you pray; it may be someone else, something else hoe God will answer the prayer you pray. But if you pray right, ask for the right things, for good things, God will always answer, it somehow some way. God is real; I know He is; I got Him living right in my heart, and so can you, if you want Him too."
Beau just smiled, he didn't quite understand yet, how to get God into his heart, but little Beau did understand and knew God was very real. Yes indeed. But he also knew Dustin also needed to tell mama about that big booboo on his legs. Nodding he then he hugged Dustin tightly around his neck, Dustin really needed that hug and Beau looked down then up at Dustin's eyes then down, back at his legs again to ask him, "Mal," he asked then looked over at his mother, "mama?"
"Yes I'll tell her. I think I can tell her now. Thanks though you really helped me out too."
Not understanding the brother's unspoken language bond, she still wanted to know if her son actually did his homework, or if he had lied about it. "Now, did you do your homework or lie about it? If you did do it, then where is it?"
"Under my bed, I did it, but it's under my bed."
"Under your bed," she thought she had a glance there but looking again, she still didn't find it.
"Uh, not that under my bed, I mean it's under my bed, as in under my mattress."
"What," pulling it up, sure enough there was the notebook and not just one but several others there as well. Dustin, with a big sigh, pulled out the recent one, and handed it to her. "What why, why would you put it there, to leave it there, purposely," she half yelled incredulous, "to forget it, do you want to fail?!"
"Exactly, that's it exactly, that's exactly what I want to do, to fail; I have to fail."
Making an almost strangling gesture she sighed, and glared at him, disbelieving and angry, as she shook her head and paused a moment to let him explain or make up some excuse, while she looked over the work, surprised by what she saw. "Why in the heck do, would," she half spudded, "you want to fail for, why?! It makes no sense! You're not doing that badly in school to just quit and drop out! I won't let you!"
Near tears, "I knew you wouldn't understand! You don't even care; you never cared about my feelings, ever after dad died! All you care about is comforting Beau, paying all you attention to him, and hardly anything to me! I know he needs training, but would it kill you to pay a little more attention to me! I don't want to lose you too," he cried, finally, finally letting his emotions out! "You don't care about me anymore since I grew up, badly, ever, so why should I tell you anything besides, you wouldn't understand my reasons, why I have to, and have no choice left in it, to fail school."
"Comfort you, Dustin, how could I? You never cried once, you hardly shed a tear, if anything you bottled it up, and never cried. How could I comfort you when you don't cry? I thought you were doing okay, that you were sad but okay with it. Sure, I knew you were at peace knowing Skip is up in Heaven with Jesus, but you still needed to cry, to mourn, but yet at the same time, I can't try to comfort you when you don't even cry. As for you being a teenager, yes, part of it is that, I need to reconnect but you have to understand sweetheart, it's just as hard for me too. I'm not only dealing with the death of my beloved husband, and your father, but you're entering your awkward teen years, without Skip. Yes, part of it is that, you're right you're my first child, I'm going blow it, a lot, with you, I know a lot of the stuff you will go through will be similar to what I have went through but a lot of it will not be, it will be completely different, a completely different set of problems. Some I might not know how to deal with. Dustin if you had just cried know this, I would have comforted you, but you pushed me away, and you secluded yourself, and wouldn't let me in, how could I help you if you do that to me, push me away and never talk with me hardly ever anymore?"
"I…" But there was nothing to say, she was right he never cried and when he did, it was never in front of her, Beau did cry. That's why he got consoled. He had pushed her away he had distanced himself from her, believing she maybe was to blame for his misery; he should have run to her not away from her. There was a Biblical lesson in that, not run away from God not from God or for that matter, your parent(s) who loves you and can help you; he had been pretty darn foolish. "I'm a fool and idiot."
"You're not you made a mistake, we all make them. I just wished you told me this sooner how you felt, and what was going on." She looked over the work it was neat but more importantly Dustin got it, the lessons from what she saw and she knew from her days in school, the answers were correct. "This is, correct, from what I see, why would you not want to hand it in, why, why do you want fail?"
"I don't want to, but I have no choice left any more, I have no choice left, but to fail."
"Why?"
Sniffling and ashamed shaking deeply, it took a lot of courage to do what he did even if it was only to drop his pants down, "That's why."
With a loud gasp, she nearly retched at the sight, "Dustin, where did you get those bruises from, where, where did you get them, who gave them to you?!"
Shaking absolutely terrified that mother was angry at him, Dustin spilled everything, "Gordon, Gordon King, my boss, he beat me, he beat me, because I tried to get out of my criminal job. I didn't want to be a criminal even if daddy was one himself! I couldn't be one, I wouldn't be one. I wanted out, but he wouldn't let me, and so he beat me, he beat me up. It's not just my legs it's on my chest and my back I'm sure. That's why I wanted the Vaseline for."
"Why would you get a criminal job for anyhow? You really can't phone them up and tell him you quit, or…"
"No, that's why I was beat, because I did try to quit. I was tricked; I didn't know until it was too late to get out of it. When I took a walk after my birthday, I went to go cry in private over growing up badly daddy being dead, everything. Gordon found me there and asked if I was Skip's son yes, yes, I knew it you look just like him, and I can tell you have the exact same qualities in you as your father. He said he heard that he died, it should have been a red flag right there, but I never realized until much later. He just asked me, how would you like to come and work for me, in your dad's job, in the teen entry level of course? I said yes I would love to, I was curious what dad did for a living, as well as knowing you quit your job, we would need the income, and my Aspiration screamed yes, yes, yes. So I took it, and asked what my job was, he never said, it was a surprise is all he said to me. Once I was sworn in, and told some things, that's when I found out, a criminal job. I freaked out and yelled at him for getting me in a criminal job, and told him right there I quit. What's more, I was going to the police. He beat me up. That's why I have to fail, they can't keep me if I fail in school; they'll have no choice but to fire me, if I fail in school. My principal knows, I told her I have to get out of a job, I can't quit it, but only get out of it by failing. I told her I would do all my work and homework, I just won't hand it in, so let me fail my classes naturally, or it will be way too suspicious. All my teachers know this, and basically understand the reason. They know I will hand it in when I can. If I survive that long, chances are Gordon will come here and try to kill me for trying it that stunt. He's already threatened me and my family with more harm if I tried to ever quit," Dustin shook and trembled coldly in with truth and fear, already looking out the window just in case the goon was out there now.
"That's genus, to do that, I wouldn't have even thought of that."
"It's not; I did what I had to do. It's stupid, to fail, like you said, just like me."
"Oh shut up, Satan," Brandi rebuked the enemy away who was nagging and ripping on her son. "Dusty it was genius, and you know what, that was the biggest act of bravery to show me what you did and admit what you did, to me. Lord knows there's millions of Sims mostly women some men, who get beaten every day and never stand up for themselves, and they just go on taking it probably blaming themselves that it was somehow their fault."
"Why do I feel so badly then for?"
"Mal," Beau shouted loudly, pointing down. Dustin's eyes opened, of course.
"You're right it is the Evil One it is the Devil it is Satan. I don't have anything to feel badly for nor about do I? Even the criminal things I did, because I know Jesus loves me and forgives me too. I know He knows I did not want to do them in the first place. I just had to do them for fear of another beating. Maybe dad was in the same position; maybe he was criminal too and just couldn't get out of the job, just like me."
"No. Dustin, your father was not a criminal; it's time that you knew the truth. The reason why you couldn't and didn't know what your dad did for a living was because he was a Spy he worked for the Sim CIA."
"What?! He, he's, a spy, was a spy, for real?" All those times quickly flashed in his mind, of dad plying Simlock Holmes and Watson and spy like games. Why he was so good at finding clues to find the pretend criminal in these games. Why dad was so proud of him, saying you are much cleverer than I am, to figure it out, I wouldn't have figured that out. That explained his love of mystery novels and a lot of other things; he really was like his father in that way. Sure, he loved crime, but only in him finding the criminal and seeing justice being done and locking the bad guys behind bars for life, things like that.
"Yes, they weren't allowed to disclose information like that, to the public until recently, since it has gone public, but stile en now, there's a lot of secrecy. We didn't know if you could keep it a secret, like it needed to be kept. Skip said maybe one day soon they might be able to let it be known more publicly, but for now he had to keep his job a secret."
"Oh, God, so Gordon must have been after dad, that explains it, why he came after me, and why he threatened me and my family, that makes sense now!"
"Probably; I wasn't too versed in exactly what he was doing, but I did know he was after a few criminals he was tracking down over the years. So yes, I wouldn't be surprised if Gordon was one of them. We'll have to go to the doctors and get you looked at and checked over, and then to the police or better yet, the Sim CIA, they'll know better what to do. We'll have to go into hiding now."
"No, we can't, Gordon will get me, if we did that, besides, the police will arrest me, for being a criminal, we can't go to the police; we just can't!"
"Dustin is what you told me the truth, about you mistakenly getting that criminal job, that you were tricked into it?"
He looked squarely in his mother's eyes and nodded and sniffled, "Yes it's the truth, I didn't know, not until it was too late to get out of it."
"Then the police or Sim CIA won't arrest you, they will put us into protective custody under a new name, until Gordon and his goons have all been arrested and put behind bars, probably for life. Hey look at it another way, get a little payback and justice in, for him beating you like he did. Don't you want to him to suffer and pay for that, for what he did to you? Even if it's just him rotting in jail, I know I sure do!"
"Yeah sure I do, it's what I prayed for, that God's Vengeance comes on him, in French, closest thing I could do to praying in tongues, you know. Still, as much as I want to him to pay for it, for what he did to me, but not at the risk of my family I sure don't! He threatened me if I ever tried to go to the police he would hunt me and the rest of my finally down and do away with us like he did the countless numerous others in that town I came from. Whatever that meant," he told his mother while she took him into the bathroom took his shirt off to look him over to see how bad it was, and get him cleaned up. Handing him some toilet paper to blow his nose and after looking him over to see how bad the bruises were how bad the damage she could see was, she gently hugged him.
"The police will put us in a safe place for the time being and put us under a new name until it is safe to come out of hiding and that won't happen until all of the criminals have been arrested. We will be safe wherever we go, even if it is out of town."
"We'd have to move, that's bad enough, but out of town too, but what about Angela?"
"Probably yes, and forget about Angela, I told you I forbid you to see her, and I said it for a good reason, out of love, you're too good for her."
"But I love her."
"No you don't you do not love her, I know you don't love her."
"I do love her!"
"No, you don't. I know what real love is, you think you love her, but in reality," turning him a bit so he was looking right in the bathroom mirror, "you only see the surface of what you think is love. Dustin Mathew Broke, look in the mirror, and you tell me, what do you see, tell me what do you see, looking back at you?"
"Me."
"Yes, now you look closer, look harder, look deeper, and tell me what do you really see, on your face, tell me what have you been hiding all these years? What have you been covering up and hiding behind all that makeup all of these years, tell me. What's hiding beneath the surface?"
"Hiding my…my, sigh, I see, my…the real me, a frightened child, hiding behind the makeup. I've been, hiding, my freckles, the real me I've been hiding it behind the makeup, my freckles."
"Yes, your freckles the freckles you were born with, and have been hiding for 10 years or more now. Yes a scared little boy, and who have you been hiding them from all of these years and why?"
"Angela, because she beat up that little girl in Kindergarten, I was playing with, for, just having freckles, and I told the teacher on her, for picking a fight, to stop it."
"Yeah, she verbally threatened she would beat up Dusty uh Dusty, she would beat you up, not just for telling on her, but for having freckles too. So what happened, you changed your hair and went by your actual name and stopped using your nickname you love so much, and started wearing makeup to cover up your freckles. Do you really want to be the boyfriend to some psychotic witch of girl who will beat the snot out of you like Gordon did to you, just because you have freckles, and did the right thing by telling on her to the teacher? Dusty, that isn't love, that's fear; you have been in fear of Angela for the past 10 plus years now. You tried to make peace with her by being her friend, or maybe you mistakenly thought it was her sister, and for what, to be friends with Angela for what, out of I want to be her friend because I like her, no, out of fear; that she will come after me like she did to that little girl. Oh, Dustin, I hardly remember you, what you look like anymore, you've been covering your face up with concealer makeup for so many years now; to hide the cute features you were born with that God gave you. For what, to hide it from a girl you tried to be friends with out of fear, and are trying to start a fear based romantic relationship with, no. Wakeup, Dustin, there is no fear in love, but God's perfect Love casts out all of that fear; He gave you that perfect example did He not, when He died for you on the Cross?"
"Yes, and well I, but, I do fear God."
"Okay, so how do you fear Him, how do you fear God?"
"That I will screw up and do something bad and sin, and disappoint Him, that way, I love God I gave Him my life and heart, and I want to please Him, but I know I'm going to do it, mess up, blow it, in some way, but I don't want to do it, and I'm really sorry when I do it," Dustin said, tearing up, just thinking about it. "I'm already sorry enough as it is with this crappy job I got, I was tricked into and do horrible bad things, I hate it I hate it so much!"
"Good, very good I'm glad to hear it. We raised you so well to know that, for having a disgust for things like that but that's a good healthy fear that you have there, that you don't want to disappoint the one you love by doing something to damage that relationship. Dustin, oh Skip was the exact same way. He gave to you a wonderful example to follow by showing you what the Heavenly Father is like, and he helped lead you to God to be saved. Skip gave to you a wonderful legacy to follow in, and I couldn't be happier about it. You know what else about your dad, he made lots of mistakes too, and he made a big one, he knew he made a mistake with being uninformed and accidently taking Romance; and he warned you sternly not to take it just to spare you the pain he endured by having that Aspiration. Even so, in his mistake, his love for God, and me, made a miracle happen. Did he ever tell you?"
"Something about not getting bad memories, I think for that Aspiration?"
"Yes, he never got any bad memories for going steady with me, getting engaged, then married, to me, which is miracle, since all Romance Aspirations always get bad memories for that. Skip didn't, get any, because he loved not only God so much, but me as well and God changed him, to see himself, differently as if that wasn't his Aspiration at all, long before we had the ability to do that change them, or have a Secondary Aspiration. It was a miracle; God gave him the grace to overcome it. Real love isn't afraid, or is in fear of what someone will do to you, like the big secret you've been hiding from Angela for all these years. Okay, let's take a little pretend trip into the future, play some pretend, so you do have that first kiss with Angela, it's so wonderful, and you start a lovely romantic relationship with her, you go steady, and you continue hiding your freckles, from her. How do you explain you not wanting to take showers, or a bath at times, to get into the pool, or hot tub, with her, or any water?"
"I tell her the truth, because of my dad's death seeing his dead and drowned body in our pool; I have hydrophobia, and aquaphobia, so I can't be near water. I'm terrified of water now, which I am; I rather take a sponge bath than take a bath-bath, you know that, I'm sure."
Hydrophobia she knew what that meant but she never heard of aquaphobia before, judging from the sound of the word, aqua, it obviously had something to do with a, water based fear. "Fine, let's go with that, so it works, she believes you, fine, and you suffer from terrible BO and bad acne for years," Dustin giggles a bit. "Fast-forward a few years, you go to College and get engaged, fast-forward a bit more, you're graduated and now you're finally married, the ceremony was beautiful. The honeymoon was a night to remember, when you gave her your all. Fast-forward a bit more, Angela is pregnant and now having your child or children. She gives birth, to a little boy or a girl, doesn't really matter, but the baby, like you, has freckles on its face, or all over. What do you think she's going to do when she sees that on the baby and on you for that matter, and she finally finds out what you have been hiding all of these years, from her?"
"Oh no, oh God-forbid it, that, she might hurt, or even kill the baby and freak-out at me and beat the crap out of me for not telling her all these years. Oh God no, I didn't…"
"Uh-huh, exactly, do you really want to be in a relationship with someone like that? That's why I forbid it, that, you can't see each other, I knew that would be a possibility, I saw she hadn't changed. I was pretty sure it was Angela, but couldn't be sure because I knew she had an identical twin sister. But I knew if it was her she hadn't changed, or her sister was the same way. I overheard her muttering 'ugly freckled faced baby' when she saw Beau for the very first time. Now do you really want to keep going in that direction with her, to continue having a relationship with her, with someone like her?"
Finally seeing what his mother knew all along, he was really blinded. Mom she really was only trying to protect him we she forbade him to see her. "No, no not at all, I sure don't! I really was blind, wasn't I? I'll break it off, with her, mom; but we already are, going steady though, but I will breakup with her, real soon. I just don't know if I'll ever get over it and her though."
"Dustin, you will find someone else, I can promise you that, someone who loves you, for who you are, just the way you are, the way God made you," taking the washcloth and cleaning off his face and the rest of the makeup, "freckles and all." Taking him into her arms, Brandi gently hugged him. "Now we're going to go to the hospital and have you looked at and checked to see how bad the damage really is and then we're going to the police, with the doctor's full report, so the proper charges can be laid. Besides I probably should get a checkup now that I know for sure I'm pregnant."
"I just hope we have enough money for all that."
"Not to worry God will provide, just believe."
Later that night with the police's help and lending a helping hand they were packed up as much of the meager positions as they needed to take, at least for the night and were moved into a new home, under a new but old name, the Newbies. From that night on, things had only gotten better.