mezua: Here's some more weird crap from me!
Disclaimer: I've gotta say, Hiro Mashima is really killing it with the whole big breasted females and flat chested...females...thing…
Summary: Gray finds a hidden message in everyone's surnames.
"Oi, haven't you noticed before? There's something hidden within all of our last names," Gray Fullbuster rubbed his chin as he used his other hand to slowly take his shirt off.
"Like yours? I can understand," Natsu snickered, eager to start another one of their daily brawls. "Fullbuster. No full bust in sight."
"I'm surprised that you even know what the term means," Gray scoffed. "Anyway, can I get to the whole surname thing?"
"Go on, go on! Juvia cannot wait to hear more of Gray-sama's delicious voice!" Juvia swooned at the sight of the currently naked Gray with his clothing abandoned on the floor.
Oblivious to his bare attire, Gray went on, "Think about yours, firefreak. Dragneel. The 'Drag' in 'Dragneel' really might tell you that your fate is to become a drag queen."
"What's a drag queen? I hope you're not implying that I'm a girl, because I'm most definitely not part-"
"Forget it," Gray turned towards where Lucy was sitting. "For Lucy-"
"Love Rival!" Juvia seethed, getting ever so closer to drowning the whole guild in her pointless rage and tsunamis.
"You know what, we'll skip her for now," Gray grinned nervously. "On to Erza…"
"Is there something I should know?" Erza appeared in the seat next to him, a platter of strawberry shortcake in her hands. "And put your clothes back on! You dare sully a woman's chastity?!"
Gray hurriedly pulled his clothes back on, "Since when-?! Huh. Oh, and, no, nothing to be heard!"
"Alright, then. Now, make sure not to destroy the guild, yet again, with another one of your absurd brawls. I'll be going on a mission with my dear friend Lucy now," Erza called for her. "Lucy! It's friendship bonding time!"
"W-What?! I didn't sign up for anything like this~!" Lucy bawled as Erza carried her off to the train station. "Erza, I didn't even get to pack any luggage!"
She could still be heard sobbing in the distance without attempting to use even an ounce of strength to break out of Erza's grasp.
...We all know that Erza's the one who causes the most damage. Most of it.
"...I'm bored~ Fight me, Gray!" Natsu stepped into his stance.
"Flametard, I'm not in the mood! I didn't even get to finish my talk about the guild members' last names!"
"Well, too bad, I'm in the mood, and it's time to see who's the better between us two once and for all!" Natsu smirked, lighting his fists up in flames of rivalry.
Gray sighed, then shrugged, "We still don't have a winner."
"Juvia will be cheering for Gray-sama all the way!"
Gray ignored her, abrupting into a flurry of fists and feet with the fire dragonslayer. Just like any other normal day, Fairy Tail was at its best.