Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.

Welcome to the wonderful world of Edward and Bella!

Chapter 12 - Switch

Through the darkness, I heard Edward growl, a string of profanities filling my ears. Tanya laughed, "You're so sexy when you're angry, Edward."

I wanted to jump up and beat the shit out of her, rearrange her face, but the darkness got heavier, sucking me deeper into unconsciousness, until I was sure I was dreaming.

"Happy Birthday," I whispered.

"There is nothing happy about this day."

My response came out choked. "Nothing?" I looked up at Edward, but he closed his eyes and sighed.

"Only one thing." He kissed me lightly. "Please, stay with me," he murmured against my lips.

"I have to go," I sobbed, allowing my tears to fall freely, soaking his shirt as I leaned against his chest.

"There has to be a way."

"There isn't." I looked up into Edward's agonized eyes. "He's waiting."

We stood on the porch of the orphanage, wrapped in each other, and I could feel myself falling into him, wanting to crawl beneath his skin and disappear.

A car honked, the man behind the wheel was impatient, making me nervous. I'd already said my goodbyes to everybody else, but they were simple attachments that could be rebuilt elsewhere. This was one goodbye I couldn't handle.

Edward ran his fingers through my hair. "This can't be happening. This isn't happening. I'm having a nightmare." A strangled sob escaped his parted lips.

I looked up at him. "I wish you were…I wish we both were."

He glanced around, looking for inspiration. When his eyes found mine, they were determined. "I won't lose you. I can't. We can run away. Right now. We can go somewhere together."

I shook my head. "We have nowhere to go. Please be realistic."

"I can't lose you too. You're all I have."

A deep sob wracked my chest and I ran my hands up his head, fisting his hair. "That's not true. Everyone here loves you."

"They don't matter."

"Don't say that."

The car honked again, and I flinched with the sound. "I promise I'll come back for you. I promise."

He leaned forward and kissed me deeply. All of our need, our desire surged between us, and I felt myself giving in, deciding to make a run for it…with him. Something inside of me broke, and I sobbed into his mouth. He broke the kiss to whisper those three words. "I love you."

I wrapped myself around him, wishing time could stop or we that we would both die in each other's arms so we could stay together forever. "I love you too," I whispered against his ear.

Edward's voice cut through my dream. "Bella, come on baby, wake up."

I tried to find him, but I couldn't escape.

Still enveloped in my memory, I turned to face my future, walking down the sidewalk toward the black car with dark windows. My broken heart begged me to look back. I knew it would be a mistake, an image I would never forget, but I gave in and turned to take one last look at him.

Edward raised his hand out to me, as if he could pull me back with sheer will. I backed up to the car, opening the door and sliding in without taking my eyes off of him. When I closed the door, his head dropped to his chest, his hand still stretched out toward me, and I felt myself rip apart inside and out.

I turned to face my uncle, and at the sight of his face, I screamed.

"NOOOOOOOO!"

"Bella?" I felt someone shaking my shoulders. "Bella, please come back to me."

My head felt like it'd been trampled by elephants. Swaying it side to side, I tried to make my eyelids obey, but they wouldn't open. His face, the face of my uncle wouldn't leave me. I didn't remember him, but I knew I hated him, feared him, wanted him dead.

I felt myself choking, I couldn't breathe. I gasped, but air would not find me.

"You're my uncle; you're supposed to love me." I could have sworn the words left my lips, but I heard no sound. I only saw his hideous face before me. Why does my body hurt? Where is the pain coming from? Is he…cutting me?! NOOOOOO!

I lurched up, almost falling off the couch, but Edward caught me. We were still in the office, but we were alone. He sat me up and scooted next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

"What?" I looked around, confused. "Where's Tanya?"

"I had her escorted the fuck out. She had no business coming here."

I pulled my blouse up, looking at the thin white lines that crossed my stomach, barely visible in the dim light of the office.

"What happened?" Edward asked. "You were having a pretty vivid dream."

"He cut me?" I asked.

Edward glanced at something he had crumpled up in his fist. "I don't know." He looked into my eyes. "You tell me."

That was one reason why I didn't want to know what happened to me. I had thin scars all over my body, so I knew my past wasn't a good one, and now I was going to have to face it head on.

"The picture," I pointed to his hand. "Is that it?"

"Yes."

"It triggered some memories."

His eyes widened. "What memories? Tell me."

I told him everything, in detail, down to the pain I felt at the hands of my uncle. He sat patiently, nodding his head as if confirming the events that led up to my departure.

"I never knew what happened to you after you left." He sighed heavily. "I ran away…tried looking for you, but I could never find you. Every lead I got took me to a place you had been. I thought it was strange that you moved so often. James never kept you in one place."

"James?" I interrupted. "That's his name?"

"Yes."

"I didn't remember," though the sound of his name did give me chills.

"Esme eventually found me, brought me back home, and adopted me. But I never stopped hoping. I never really stopped looking for you. That fucker was just so damn good at keeping you from me."

"James…" I said his name, tasting bile on my tongue.

I reached over and pulled the crumpled up photo from his hand. When I opened it, a chill coursed through my body followed by a wave of heat. The blond man stared back at me with dark eyes and a cocky smile. I wanted to rip the smile off his face, to pull his guts out and feed it to him. I'd never had thoughts so violent in my life.

I tore the photo in half and screamed.

Edward wrapped his arms around me. "Shh…it's okay." He rocked me back and forth, rubbing soothing circles on my back.

I sighed. "I guess I should just be glad he can't hurt me anymore."

Edward stiffened in my arms.

"Edward?"

He squeezed me tight and growled, "No, I would never let anyone hurt you."

I felt him tremble and I pulled away. "Edward, are you okay?"

"He won't find you…he won't hurt you…I'll fucking kill him!"'

"Shit! Edward, snap out of it."

His furious gaze came back from whatever place his mind had taken him and he found me. "I'm…I'm sorry," he mumbled and stood up, nervously shoving his hands in his pockets as he began pacing the room.

Fear suddenly began to prick at me, shivers running through my nerves, every hair standing on end. "Edward? James can't hurt me. Right? I'm safe?"

He stopped pacing and looked at me, my fears confirmed in his worried gaze.

"No…no, no, no, no…" I started shaking my head furiously, "no, no, no, no."

He was by my side, with me wrapped in his arms, rocking me once again. "That's why Tanya was here. She sent a warning."

"A warning?"

"Yes." He grabbed my face with both hands, staring into my eyes with an intensity I'd never known before; he was going to convey something very important. "Stay calm. Just listen."

I nodded my head.

"Tanya is infatuated with me and she's furious because I have chosen you. She knows James and threatened to tell him where you are if I don't…" He didn't finish, just stared at me.

"If you don't what?"

He dropped his hands from my face, wrapping them around me. "She wants me to fire you...to never see you again. She wants me to choose her."

"What?"

"I didn't agree, of course. I told her to fuck off. Bella, there's nothing she can do. I won't let her separate us."

"Is she postal?"

He laughed, but it lacked humor, "Yes, I believe she is." His face turned serious. "You will not leave my sight until James is apprehended. Do you understand me?"

"Edward…"

"Do you fucking understand me?"

Shit! The switch flipped and he was turning red, flames flashed behind his eyes.

He growled, "You will either stay at my place or I at yours, but you will not be out of my sight. Do. You. Understand. Me?"

"Yes," I whimpered, afraid of his reaction to the situation.

"No," he soothed, pulling me against him. "I'm sorry, it's just…I need to protect you. You don't understand. You won't die, he won't hurt you…" He started shaking, so I rubbed his back, trying to calm him.

"Shh…" I whispered in his ear. "Everything will be okay."

"He won't hurt you." He kept repeating it over and over again. "He won't hurt you."

"Edward?"

He wasn't responding, he just kept repeating, "He won't hurt you."

I let him hold me, worried because he wasn't reacting to anything I said. "Edward, please."

"No," he groaned, "He won't hurt you. I'll save you. I can save you…MOM!"

Mom? Shit! He wasn't with me, he was somewhere else.

"Mom!" He trembled in my arms. "Get your fucking hands off her!"

I pushed away from him and peered into his eyes. They were glazed over, somewhere else.

"Shit!" I jumped up and hit the call button on his phone, "Alice! I need you in here now!"

Within seconds Alice flew through the door.

"Oh no, not again," she moaned as she knelt before him. "Edward?" She snapped her fingers in front of his face, and it didn't even faze him. He didn't blink or flinch or even acknowledge her presence.

"Again? What do you mean, again?" I sat next to him and pulled his head to my shoulder, rubbing his back with my hand.

"This used to happen to him back when you were…um…well, when he felt like he couldn't protect you."

"Protect me from what?"

She glanced back and forth from his face to mine. "Um…I think I should get Carlisle." She stood and scurried out of the room without a glance back.

It took a bit longer than I thought for her to return with Carlisle. I sat, rocking Edward in my arms in the same manner he'd done with me until they emerged through the door.

Carlisle knelt before him, pulling his face around to gaze into his eyes. "Edward? Can you hear me?"

"Where's my mom?" he asked.

"She's gone, Edward, you know that."

"No…I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't…"

"It's not your fault. Edward, come back to us."

"No…I wasn't strong enough. I…" He glanced around the room, awareness finally setting on his eyes. "Bella?"

"I'm right here."

He turned to me, "Oh, Bella!" He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against him. "Don't ever leave me again."

"I won't…I promise."

I looked to Carlisle who smiled and stood. "Take care of him, Bella. You really are all he has right now."

I nodded.

"Alice filled me in on the Tanya situation."

"How did Alice…"

She smiled. "I know things, Bella. Call it intuition."

Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder. "Rest assured I will take care of Tanya. She will not bother you again."

"Thank you."

Alice gave me an encouraging smile as she and Carlisle left the office.

Shit! How the hell was I supposed to take care of him when I couldn't even take care of myself? I was falling into this relationship faster than I'd imagined…too fast. I felt Edward sigh against my neck and realized this was where I was supposed to be. In my vision, my memory, I'd promised to come back to him. Whether I remembered it or not, I kept my promise. I was back, and I couldn't leave him now.

He held me for a long time, eventually falling asleep in my arms. I scooted out of his grip, laying him down, pushing his feet up onto the sofa. I made my way to his desk and sat, staring at him until the phone rang.

Shit! Do I answer it? I wasn't quite sure, but I did.

"Mr. Masen's office, how can I help you?"

A friendly woman's voice came through the line, "Is this Miss Swan?"

"Yes, it is."

"This is Jane."

"Oh, hello, Jane. What can I do for you?"

"Well, I am going to be out of town for a couple of weeks, so I won't be in touch with you until I return. I will leave my manuscripts with Leah. No rush, love."

"Oh, well…" I looked at Edward lying on the sofa and the decision came instantly. "Actually that is perfect. I am going on vacation for a few weeks. I was planning on cancelling my vacation for you, but since you'll be out of town anyway…"

"That's absolutely perfect! Now I won't feel guilty about not being available. I'll contact you when I return and we can start then."

"That's great. Thanks so much for understanding."

"No, thank you, Miss Swan. Until then…"

"Until then."

I hung up the phone with a sigh and noticed Edward's wallet on the corner of his desk. I lifted it and ran my fingers across the leather, tracing the EM on the lower corner. People say, "curiosity killed the cat." Well, if I were a cat, I would have been dead a million times over.

I flipped open the wallet and gasped. The first picture in his photo album was a picture of me in my teens. I flipped through and the next four pictures were of the two of us. My heart picked up pace, my hands shaking as I stared at the beautiful faces of two teens in love. Love… I must have really loved him. I could see it in the eyes of my former self. I felt and even confessed it in my vision…my memories, or whatever was left of them. He knew what we had, and he kept the evidence in his wallet, carrying them with him every day, and I had nothing. I truly hated myself. As I stared at each picture, trying to force something from my clouded mind, I hoped someday I could live up to what we once had, even if I never remembered.

The last two photos surprised me. One was of Esme standing with a group of kids in front of the orphanage. I recognized Alice, Mike, Edward, and I among the group, but I was surprised to see Jacob in the picture as well. The last photo brought tears to my eyes. It was a young boy, maybe seven or eight, with his arms wrapped around a woman. The woman had an uncanny resemblance to Edward, and I instantly knew it was him and his mother. My heart twisted, and I wanted to cry.

I closed his wallet, placed it back where it was, and pushed the button to call Alice.

"Yes?"

"Alice, Edward and I would like to take a small vacation. Is that possible?"

"Oh! Well, yes. Mr. Cull…I mean, Carlisle can sign in his place, and I will handle the rest. Is he okay? Can I talk to him?"

"Actually, he's sleeping."

"Really? I'll have to cancel his one o'clock…or I can just handle the meeting myself." She paused. "You know what? As soon as he wakes up, I'll have a car ready for the two of you."

"Thanks, Alice."

"No problem."

Edward stirred. I hung up the phone and rushed to his side.

"Edward?" I pushed his hair out of his face. "Edward, can you hear me?"

His eyes fluttered open and he stretched. "What?" He looked around the room. "What happened?"

He sat up and rubbed his face. "Where's…." His eyes widened. "Fuck! Where's Tanya?"

"She's gone." I sat next to him. "Do you remember anything that happened after Tanya's visit?"

"What do you mean?" He looked around the room once more and saw the torn picture of James on the floor. "What the hell happened?"

"You fell asleep."

"Shit! I'm sorry. I didn't sleep at all last night."

"What?"

He ran his fingers across my face. "How could I sleep with you next to me? I couldn't stop staring at you."

I couldn't help it, I smiled. "I have a confession to make."

He raised an eyebrow. "Okay…"

I grinned sheepishly. "We are taking a vacation."

"We are?"

"Yes. For a few weeks."

"But…"

I placed my finger over his lips. "Alice will handle things. Everything has been taken care of here. Now, I need to take care of you."

"Really?" A naughty grin spread across his face. "And how do you plan on taking care of me?"

Oh, he is a bad, bad man! "Well…"

It was his turn to place his finger over my lips. "Never mind. I have a place I want to take you. You can take care of me there."

His eyes lit up like a child at an amusement park, and I knew we wouldn't make it out of the office without relieving our pent up passion first.

Just as I suspected, he ran his hands into my hair, pulling my head back to access my throat. His lips travelled up my neck and behind my ear. He nibbled my lobe and his raspy breath made me whimper.

"I want you now," he groaned.

"Take me," I breathed.