A/N: Hey, here's a longer chapter for you, hope you enjoy it. It's a bit rough right now, but stick with it; I promise it'll get better. R&R, as always!
Disclaimer: is there really any need…?
We had ridden in silence for hours, and I was beginning to get bored with looking at the scenery. I decided to play a game, one that Ashley and I used to play when we were bored in ZBZ meetings. To play, you look around the room or wherever you happen to be, and pick out an item or object. Then you name the first person that comes to mind. For example, if I happened to see a sign with the word 'bitch' on it in bold letters, I'd probably think of Rebecca Logan. But that's beside the point.
I craned my neck to look out the window. I was sitting in the back, since Rusty was driving and he insisted on putting his stupid boom box on the passenger seat. Right now, I was being treated to a delightful rendition of 'Open My Eyes' played by Dale's band. ("Dale and I turned into such good friends," said Rusty when I asked him about it. "He made this CD for me so I'd remember him over the break.") Two words. Gag. Me.
So anyway, back to the game. The first thing I saw was a tree. Yup, I know, that's original. The tree bark was a dark, chocolaty brown, smooth and rough at the same time. And the first thing I thought of was Cappie.
Cappie's hair, to be more precise. I used to love to run my fingers through it while we were sitting in his room watching 'Saved By The Bell' or eating pie. Or making out. Or doing…other things.
The point is that I really loved his hair, among other things. I really loved him. I honestly don't know what happened to us. I've tried so hard to blame our break up on Frannie or ZBZ, but the only justifiable reason is that I was too immature and self conscious to do what I knew was right.
I was so in love with Cappie that it hurt. I would see him across the street, and my whole body would tremble with the need to be in his arms. I loved Evan too, of course, but ours was a simple, safe love, while Cappie and I loved with a raging passion. Our love was the opposite of simple. It was so nonsensical and weird and confusing and wonderful that it left us both gasping for air and wanting more at the same time.
I would always love both Evan and Cappie. But I knew in my heart that I had to move on and let both of them go. Or did I?
Oh, and by the way. The next thing I saw out the window was a dead squirrel in the road. The first person I thought of was Evan. Were the Gods trying to tell me something?