"That stupid little shit! Sasori, who are you rooming with?" Hidan asked disgusted with Kakuzu.
"I'm sorry what?" Sasori asked.
"When we leave for Vegas who are you and Lola rooming with?"
"Uh, huh….now when you say 'rooming with'….what exactly do you mean by that?" Sasori was purposely avoiding his question. He didn't want to tell Hidan what Lola had secretly done one week before.
"Who is going to share a room with you and Lola. We know that Deidara, Itachi, Marisol and Dana are all in a room together. Kisame, Zetsu, Kakuzu and me were supposed to room together because Pein and Konan already have a room. But now Kakuzu is being such a fucking ass I will NOT room with him.
"Uh huh yeeeeeeaahhh…about that…..um…..me and Lola have had a room booked for like a week and a half now. You kind of can't stay with us."
"Oh my god, seriously? You mean I'm….I….I'm going to….have to deal with Kakuzu!? How could you do this to me!?"
"It's quite simple really. See, I can sleep with Lola……not you…that would just not work out." Sasori said calmly.
"Sasori! I'm….I'm…..hell I'll get over it. Besides if Kakuzu pisses me off then I'll just drown him in the pool of the MGM Grand Hotel Resort and Casino." Hidan said beginning to formulate a plan.
"That's nice." Sasori said absently as he made a last minute list of things to get for the Vegas trip.
"Okay, Marisol we leave tomorrow, yeah. I have everything worked out for Princess. Do we need any extra food for her, yeah?" Deidara wondered starting to panic about the furry purry little friend who was now winding her way between his legs begging to be picked up.
"Okay, good. Hey do you think I should take an extra set of hot curlers?" Marisol wondered.
"Hmmmm….well it definitely couldn't hurt, yeah." Deidara said. "Oh I am so taking that amazing skin refining toner…you know the one that Nordstrom just started selling, yeah!" Marisol's face lit up.
"I love that toner! She nearly screamed. Downstairs the doorbell rang. Since Lola was the only one downstairs at the time closet to the door she went to answer despite the fact that she was talking rapidly on the phone to someone from her law firm: Callahan, Murray and Associates.
"I don't know I'll have to deal with that in three days, I'm going to Las Vegas tomorrow. Well just have Denise fax those records and then I'll….." Lola opened the door and was speechless for a moment. "Larry, I'm going to have to call you back." She cut her Blackberry off and stared at the figure in the doorway. Lola laughed out loud "Okay, I am REALLY hoping that you aren't the result of a broken condom and an after prom party. SASORI!" Lola yelled upstairs. "Oh come in, I'm Lola."
"Hey do you think we need….OH MY GOD GAARA!? WHAT THE HELL!? WHAT THE….WHY….WHAT THE HELL!?" Sasori's voice had gotten all squeaky and irrational.
"Hey. Sorry, I tried to call….you're on the phone a lot. I'm here to watch the cat." Gaara said.
"You mean dumb ass Deidara drug you all the way down here to feed his damn cat?"
"Yeah, he said I owed him one." Gaara said still holding a travel bag over one shoulder and a suitcase. Sasori sighed and shook his head.
"Oh my god, I am…I am so sorry he did that…DEIDARA!" Sasori yelled. "Oh, oh god. Gaara this is my girlfriend Lola. Lola, Gaara's from Suna. He went to the same school as I did. People fucked with him and made him hate himself just like me.
"Oh thank god. For a minute I thought maybe he was you're and that you were keeping something from me." Lola laughed.
"Oh hell no, although the red hair is a good tip off."
"Hey, Sasori have you soon my overnight moisturizing…..YOU, YEAH!" Deidara said pointing at Gaara who was now sitting on the living room couch with Sasori and Lola. "You're here, good! Alright, now come with me….you have to learn how to take care of Princess, yeah." Deidara instructed. Gaara looked at Sasori.
"It's a cat…what's to know? It meows, it purrs, you feed it." Gaara said shrugging his shoulders.
"Oh, but Gaara this is MARISOL'S cat. It's going to require some kind of special attention I'm sure." Sasori said rolling his eyes.
"Okay, now come with me. You brush her once a day with this brush, when she meows pick her up, when she brushes against her, pick her up, yeah. She eats in the morning, her favorite toy is this little purple mouse with the bow, she likes to be picked up and taken outside to get the mail. Clean her litter box 3 times a day and ALWAYS make sure her water is FRESH, yeah!" Deidara demanded. "Now if she's upset when we get back…it's your ass, yeah." Deidara warned.
"Tobi, Tobi no! No Tobi you can't take that." Zetsu was trying to supervise Tobi's packing…he wasn't doing very well.
"But Zetsu!" Tobi whined.
"Tobi, no one takes a My Little Pony Ultimate Stying Head to Las Vegas!" Zestu was losing his patience.
"Can I…."
"No! No! No! Tobi the last time you took that stupid Stretch Armstrong somewhere you got it caught in a bus door and it stretched half a city block! God…..I can only imagine what it would do on a plane." Zetsu imagined the horror.
"Well what about…."
"Tobi." Zetsu cut Tobi off. "The only things allowed on the trip are clothes, anything you need for the shower, and 5 of those stupid granola bars you like…..nothing else! No stupid things!" Zetsu scolded.
Meanwhile, Itachi was attempting to pack but his temper had gotten the best of him…
"OH MY GOD! YOU'D THINK SUITCASE DESIGNERS WOULDN'T MAKE CHEAP SHIT!" Itachi screamed at the suitcase. "ZIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP! ZIP YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! AAAAGGGGHHH! OH MY GOD I THINK I JUST BROKE MY FINGER OFF! OH MY GOD! OH GOD! SOMEBODY CHECK IT! HELLLLLLOOOOO! OH MY GOD! DO YOU PEOPLE NOT EVEN CARE. OH FUCK YOUALL! AAAAGGGGHHHHH!" And Itachi went ignored because Dana was underneath the hairdryer, Marisol was buried in the closet. Zetsu was fighting with Tobi, Kisame was outside checking the security system box, Hidan and Kakuzu were into it over why gambling should be a sport, Deidara was busy showing Gaara where all the kitty things were and Lola and Sasori….well they were just trying to avoid it all.