Disclaimer: Yeah, I still own nothing. Santa, if you are reading this: please give me Dean for Christmas. I'll forgo the right to Supernatural in favour of Dean…wicked grin
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Hi everyone! Thanks for all the kind reviews! They made me want to actually finish this fic. Another thanks goes out to all of you who added this story (or me) to your alerts!
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When the majority of newspaper had been torn away Dean's felt like his breath had been sucked from his lungs. There was an old and worn jewelry box that Dean remembered vividly from throughout his childhood. Mary had given it to John on his last birthday before her death and John wore it everyday until that fateful night. After his beloved wife's death, John had bought a box to put it into and had carried it around with him every time they had moved. Dean remembered many nights when he couldn't sleep and he would check on Sammy before sneaking out of their room to watch his father. After Mary's death John seemed to fall apart. He drank incessantly and almost seemed to be unable to look at his boys because they reminded him so much of their mother, but on those late nights he would creep in the shadows and watch over his father as he drunkenly sobbed to the watch.
Dean silently stalked down the short hallway of their living quarters. His father was sitting on the edge of the couch with his elbows on his knees and his watch cradled in his large hands. A half finished bottle of whiskey sat by his feet as the light glittered off the silver watch face when John's broken voice reached the five year old's ears.
"Mary…oh my beautiful Mary! What am I supposed to do without you? I can't raise these two boys on my own!" John slurred. "They are so innocent and Dean asks about you all the time. I don't know what to tell him. I can't even look at him or Sammy without seeing you. I…" John started to sob, "I need you!"
Dean saw his father stroke the back of the watch and continue to cry so he moved out of the shadows, walked up to his father and hugged him with all the strength he possessed. "It's going to be okay Daddy. I'll take care of Sammy and you won't have to worry about it. We'll be okay. I know you miss Mommy…I do too. But we have each other and Mommy still loves us. I can feel it. Can you?"
John, who was shocked out of his sad, drunken state at his son's sudden appearance, thought for a long moment. Here was his five year old son trying to comfort him. It should be the other way around, and yet, Dean seemed to possess wisdom beyond his years. "Yeah Dean, I can still feel it," he gave his eldest son a watery smile. John could see Dean looking at the watch with curiosity only befitting of a small child, "Dean, your Mother gave this to me for my birthday. It's the best thing I have, except for you two boys. It will be yours when you're old enough."
Dean hadn't seen the watch in almost two years even though he used to periodically rifle through his father's things when he was asleep just to hold something that Mary had treasured so long ago. Even as an adult, he found an immeasurable amount of comfort from this piece of jewelry and thought it had been lost when the possessed man had crashed into the Impala.
Dean's eyes snapped up to his younger brother's and, for once in his life, Dean didn't try to hide the emotions playing on his face, "Wh…where? I thought…I…"
"The Impala. After the crash I went to get the guns to hide them and I grabbed Dad's bag. I left it at Bobby's and only remembered about it a little while ago. I saw the watch and remembered you telling me something about that watch when I was really small. You coveted that watch…almost as much as your precious Impala," Sam joked.
"Sammy," Dean breathed.
"You like it?"
"I love it. Right after Mom died…" Dean's voice trailed off for a moment, "Dad promised me that he would give it to me when I was older. It, uh, it represents a lot of things for me that I'd forgotten. It's…the best thing I've ever gotten. That and my protection necklace you gave me that one Christmas."
"Sapphire Barbie. I remember," Sam deadpanned.
"Okay, this is all getting a bit too after school special for me," Dean smirked and Sam laughed while shaking his head. The eldest Winchester walked over to the desk drawer and opened it, removing a beautifully wrapped and ribboned gift.
"Whoa Dean! You went all out on that!" Sam exclaimed.
"Well Sammy—"
"It's Sam," he interrupted.
"As I was saying Sammy, I got this at this store and I saw this smoking hot chick at the gift wrapping kiosk. I asked her to wrap it as a gift for my younger brother and to make it extra special as I had a terminal illness and wasn't going to be around for much longer. Naturally, she gave me her number, I took her out that night, then she took me home."
"Dean!" Sam groaned.
"What? Okay, just think of that as a dying Christmas wish!"
"Do you know how many of those you've had? I've lost count!"
"But that night…it was totally worth it! I should have thought of that earlier and used it as part of a pickup line. The chicks really love that mushy crap!" He laughed at the horrified look on his younger brother's face and handed him the gift. "Go for it Sammy."
Sam carefully slipped the ribbon off the package, tore away the blue and silver wrapping paper almost frantically. The paper had been removed to reveal a snapshot of the two Winchester's at the greasy spoon restaurant while they had been working the cursed rabbit's foot job. Sam looked mortified and Dean was grinning like a fool: it was hysterical because Sam had never seen the picture because things had gotten so harried after it had been taken. Sam remembered Dean's line after he 'rescued' Sam at the motel: "I'm Batman!" His brother always wanted to be Batman while they were children.
Sam's ears picked up a quiet tinkering sound and he glanced up to see Dean holding out the keys to his precious baby (otherwise known as the Impala). "Dean…"
"No, Sammy! I want you to have these. They won't do me any good where I'm going."
"Dean, I decided to do all of this to make you see that you aren't going anywhere. If giving you a stupid watch is helping you to decide to roll over and die, then give it back to me."
"Sammy…"
"Shut up Dean! It's Sam, not Sammy. If you're willing to just die then tell me now and I'll leave. I can't…" Sam took a deep breath, "I can't lose the only person who has ever been there for me. You can't just give up. If you are, then I'm gone. It's as simple as that."
"It's not that simple!" Dean shouted.
"YES IT IS!" Sam hollered back equally as loud.
"NO IT'S NOT! IF I DO FIGHT THIS OR TRY TO WEASLE MY WAY OUT OF IT, THEN YOU'RE DEAD! I DID THIS FOR YOU! I'M YOUR BIG BROTHER! IT'S MY JOB TO WATCH OVER YOU AND PROTECT YOU WHEN YOU CAN'T OR WON'T PROTECT YOURSELF! DON'T TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME! Not now. Not tonight…" Dean's voice had gone from almost ear shattering proportions to a mere whisper. He looked up at his brother and felt all the pent up tears that he had been holding back spill over and pour down his cheeks. "Dammit Sammy! I don't want to fight over this, I really don't, okay? I made my choice. It may seem incredibly selfish to you right now, but I need you to understand something for me. I'm different than you and Dad; I'm like a dog with pack instincts. I will fight fiercely for my family—to the death if necessary, but if I can't save them and am left alone I'll just lie down and die. I can't form a new pack. You're it for me little brother. You can go on and meet a nice girl, finish your schooling, settle down, have a few kids. You can have the all-American dream complete with the white picket fence and the freakin' apple pie! It's not for me; it never was and it never will be."
Sam's phone rang and his eyes flicked down to the caller ID: Bobby. "I've gotta take this."
Dean threw his hands up in the air as his younger brother answered the phone and spoke rather cryptically when his face suddenly went pale and he thanked their friend and hung up. "Dean," Sam started and couldn't finish, his throat seemed to suddenly close up on him. His older brother, the one who always held it together suddenly sounded so broken.
"Sammy, please. I'm tired. I just want this to be over. I want you to promise me you'll go back to Stanford and finish your degree. Promise me you'll be the best damn lawyer out there. Promise me you won't end up like me."
"I can't promise you those things…"
"What? I ask you for a few measly things and all you can say is 'I can't promise you those things?'"
"Dean, that was Bobby—"
"I know who it was! I saw your phone!"
"He was calling to tell us that—"
"I don't care why he was calling!"
"Dean, would you stop acting like such a girl and let me speak?"
Dean's mouth which had been opening quickly snapped shut and he settled for a burning glare.
"As I was trying to say, that was Bobby. We've been working on a way for you to get out of the crossroads deal. He promised to call me and tell me if he made any progress. I told him to take tonight off because of the scavenger hunt. But he didn't listen."
"What are you trying to say Sammy?" Dean asked cautiously.
"He did it. That son of a bitch really did it. He took the colt and went straight to the top of the demonic food chain. He got you out of your deal and even managed to kill a couple of them before escaping…barely."
"So, I'm not…dying?"
"Apparently not. Bobby mentioned some promise he'd made to Dad a while ago, I didn't really get the whole story because he was pretty beat and was almost asleep when I got off the phone with him."
"Sweet."
"That's all you have to say?"
Dean seemed to think for a while, "Yup!" Dean blinked and while he was opening his eyes he was tackled and pinned to the floor.
Dean lay on the ground and struggled with his younger, yet taller brother for a few moments before relaxing his body and placing his hands behind his head, "Good one Sammy. You're learning young grasshopper."
"You're giving up?" Sam asked suspiciously.
Dean nodded yes while simultaneously shouting, "NO!" His hand shot out and grabbed Sammy's ankle whilst slightly squeezing it. Sam yelped giving Dean enough time and space to roll his brother onto the floor and pin him.
After another few minutes of wrestling Sam hobbled over to the TV while Dean placed their photo on the table between the two beds. They crawled into their respective single beds as the sun began to rise over the horizon. Dean had a bloody lip (thanks to Sam's knee) and a scratch from his left eyebrow to his nose, Sam's hair was a rat's nest on top of his head and he had the beginnings of a black eye (courtesy of Dean's elbow). They settled back and watched Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer while laughing at all the various scenes and remembering their past Christmases; they may not have been the happiest, loving or plentiful times of their childhoods, but it was all they had and they loved it. Dean's eye caught on the picture and he smiled. He had everything to live for now that Sammy and Bobby had somehow managed to break his deal with the crossroads demon. Hell, maybe he'd even take part in the all-American dream…
"Merry Christmas, Sammy."
"Merry Christmas, Dean."
The movie played on for a few minutes until…
"Bitch."
"Jerk."
Well, that's it. I hope you liked it! It was my first fic, so please don't forget to read and review this one! I'm not sure about the ending…
A special thanks goes out to Poisonchik88 for giving me the wonderful suggestion on what the boys should give each other and also to spookyfox23 for the review and all of you who added this story to your alerts!
Merry Christmas and happy New Year to all of you out there!
