Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse.

Author's note:

This is my first chapter when Bella is a vampire.

How do like her new gift? Do you think it's a proper gift according to her features in her human life?

So please, do not forget to review.

Thanks a lot to all of you who already did. You're really great!

12. Gift

"Careful, love, don't underestimate your new physical strength." I heard Edward's voice; but I heard other voices, too. They were farer away, somewhere in the house.

"As I'd said, Bella woke up," Alice proclaimed smugly.

"Don't mention that to Emmett, maybe….," Jasper broke off.

"No chance, I did beat you there," Emmett chuckled.

My senses seemed to react extremely sensitive. I sniffed.

"What is it?" Edward asked.

I removed my hand from my eyes and smiled at him. He looked tortured with deep purple bruise-like rings under his eyes. In spite of his unbearable beauty there was something new, something awful on his face. Something that was obvious; but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"Your scent is that strong I've never realized it's intensity before," I said in astonishment.

He chuckled.

"Is it done now?" I demanded, glancing curiously at my hands.

Edward nodded; his gaze was hard on me. Then he brushed gently along my cheek with his knuckles.

"You're so unbelievable warm," I remarked.

"No, Bella, you're now as cold as me," he said sadly.

"Aren't you happy that it is done now, Edward? That I am finally like you? It seemed to me like you regret what you have done."

"No again, Bella. Actually, there is something I regret; but that concerns exclusively the way and the circumstances that led to your transformation on our wedding day. You had no real choice," he paused.

"Go on, Edward," I confirmed him to continue, swallowing hard.

"Why did you do this? What did influence you to act like that? You didn't plan it; so you made your decision straight on in the car. Why, Bella. I thought I would lose you. It was awful."

He shook slowly his head and pain crossed his pale face. I watched him carefully. He looked suffering. And there was it – the "something" I couldn't identify one minute ago – it was sadness and pain - unbearable pain.

"I am so sorry, Edward. I didn't plan to kill myself. That was an accident. It was very childish, stupid and reckless to drive like this; but it felt nice at the moment. I almost could taste freedom there behind the wheel. I did not think about anything I just accelerated. It felt safe with you next to me. I did never imagine…" I waited for tears.

"What," Edward asked with a harsh tone in his velvet voice.

"Nothing," I shook my head. "I feel like I have to cry," I admitted after a long minute.

"But you won't because you can't anymore, Bella," Edward finished coherently and with a hint of reproach.

Then he must have seen something on my face that changed his mood. Seconds later I found myself cradled in his arms and pressed against his chest. It was different, a new feeling. Edward's body wasn't anymore as hard as I remembered it. Indeed, his body felt more resistant than a human's one would be; but it felt more familiar now, more tender than I was used to it. He hugged me tightly, less carefully as he would have done if I had been still human. His scent didn't seem so appealing to me anymore. I liked it still pretty much; but there was less force in it. I pressed my face against his chest and started to relax. His long fingers patted my back, brushing along my spine.

"I thought I lost you out there. Your body was shaking pretty hard because of the severe injuries. Everywhere was blood. The only way to save you was to change you, Bella. I will never forget the image of you lying there and dying," Edward said in a low voice. He sounded like a broken man. It hurt that he was still suffering from pain caused by my accident.

"It's over, Edward. I was willing to become one of your kind. And now it happened a bit earlier as planed. It doesn't matter to me. And it shouldn't to you." Putting my hands on his cheeks, I looked into his eyes and they suddenly burned. I was used to the force they had on me as I was human; but this was completely different, much more powerful. I had no chance. I couldn't resist and kissed him. He kissed me back. All boundaries were fallen. And this was the moment I suddenly understood Edward had never been able before to be completely himself with me. He always had had to be careful and concentrated on not hurting me.

This was a complete new Edward. He was passionate and determined by his instincts. I could feel his tongue in my mouth, circling around, and mine was in his. There was no need to be careful with his razor-sharp teeth. Mine were now as sharp as his and my skin was quite indestructible. I heard a low growl building up in his chest and he seemed pretty much to enjoy what we did. Breathing wasn't any longer a reason for kissing breaks and my dizziness was gone, too. Until now, I enjoyed pretty much being a vampire.

Abruptly he pulled away. I glanced in his eyes, willing to get more of his performance. "Sorry, that was totally out of line," Edward apologized. "I'm only so happy you still exist in this world. I couldn't bear a world in that you don't exit," he said, his eyes smoldering.

"Em…," I mumbled. "I wasn't really aware of any still existing lines. Actually, I thought there is no need for any lines anymore," I complained.

That's right, sweetheart; but we've a lot of overhearing people in that house," he grinned crookedly.

"Oh, sure, I see." And if I was still able, I would blush right there. About this I was one hundred percent sure.

A bit embarrassed I stood up of the bed and made my way carefully to the window wall, letting my glance wander through the garden. All stuff of my wedding was gone. Closing my eyes, I tried to forget about it and to concentrate on more pleasant things – my future with Edward. There had to exist a quite good story to explain to all wedding gusts what happened to me; but I was still too much of a coward to ask Edward which story exactly that was.

My legs felt heavy like they weighed a tone. I stepped slowly along the window wall.

"Your eyes are very beautiful; but they must be quite sensitive by now, too. Every light hurts you, doesn't it?"

"Thanks," I muttered. "Yes, you have no idea how right you are, they hurt pretty much and the sun doesn't even shine," I replied easily to Edward, still glancing around in the garden.

Edward stiffened next to me.

"What?" I asked alarmed, glaring at him.

"What do you exactly mean by you did not say anything, Edward?"

He smiled at me.

"No, please, tell me that's not true. I don't wanna have that gift."

"What do you do, Bella?" Edward shouted all of a sudden, pressing his long, pale fingers to his temples and falling down on his knees.

I looked scared at him, not knowing what happened.

He struggled with pain. It seemed like he was fighting something.

I wanted he stopped that. His thoughts were that confused.

"It's you, it's you," his mind screamed at me.

I was puzzled. What was me? I did nothing. I only wanted Edward stopped that and went sit dawn on his black leather couch.

I glared at him and he obeyed.

What a coincidence, I thought to myself. But Edward still didn't seem to be himself. His gaze was empty and he didn't say anything. The pain appeared to be gone and with the pain Edward's personality.

I glared shocked at him, wishing he would stand up, come to me, and tell me how much he loved me. And again, he did so.

"Oh no, I'm able to control his mind. And damn, I've no idea how I do this or how I can stop this," I realized slowly.

At the beginning he fought my force; but then he lost the fight.

Oh God, that was awful.

I shook him; but nothing happened.

Then I sat down on the couch put my hands on my face, closing my eyes. My thoughts circled and stopped by Jake. How would he react at the time he found out that I'm a vampire. I felt sorrow. And my thought stepped away to Charlie and my mother.

Lost in my parent's images I heard Edward's voice. "Bella, that was cruel," he complained. "Never do that again to people you call your friends," he said, teasing.

My eyes flipped open.

"What was that," I asked, scared of my own skills.

Edward chuckled. "Actually love, I think you are a little mind controller."

"Oh no, I thought so; but I still hoped that's not true," I moaned.

"That's not bad, Bella. Certainly, you must train your skills; but it's a great gift. Your mind has always been safe. That was a passive protection against attacker. Now you've also gotten the skill of an active protection. You can bring down everybody who wants to hurt you."

"Not just everybody who wants to hurt me, remember?" I said sarcastically.

Edward chuckled.

"You were in my head and I couldn't kick you out. Your force was quite impressive. So, let's go downstairs. The others are waiting for us. Alice is bouncing of excitement," Edward said, grinning.

I looked scared at him. What would be, if I controlled unintentionally anybody's mind? I thought to myself, hesitating.

Then Edward scooped me up and headed easily with me on his arms for the stairs as if I was still human and nothing had ever happened.