NEON GENESIS EVANGELION: THE FIRST

Written by: SaxonBlue

The characters and events in Neon Genesis Evangelion are created and copyrighted by Gainax, Project Eva and ADV Films (amongst others). These are used entirely without permission. Sorry.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: The First created and copyrighted by Nigel Read 2001-2008. This work may not be used or distributed without the prior permission of the author. In particular, the characters of Dr Hiroshi Takamura and Fuuka Soseki remain the intellectual property of the author.

Session Five: Past and Present

1.

Tuesday, 17th November, 2015

Dr Hiroshi Takamura sat on a bench and looked out over the bay, the sunlight glittering off the water's surface making him squint. Under the surface of the bay was buried the decaying ruins of a once great city. The tips of a few buildings thrust out of the water like gravestones.

"Do you come here often?"

Takamura turned to face the speaker. A man dressed in a dark blue NERV uniform slouched against what had once been a streetlight. His long, brown hair was tied into a pony-tail, and rough stubble covered his face. The edges of his mouth were lifted in the merest hint of a smile.

"As often as I can. It's very peaceful. No one else comes here." The doctor hesitated. "Do I know you?"

"Ryoji Kaji, at your service," said the stranger, with an elaborate bow. "And you, of course, are the famous Dr Hiroshi Takamura. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Thankyou," replied Takamura, frowning. "But I didn't know I was famous."

"Amongst NERV security personnel, you're virtually a celebrity." Kaji chuckled, and sat on the bench. He leaned back lazily and gazed out across the bay. "It certainly is quiet, isn't it, with only the birds and the cicadas to keep you company."

"And the ghosts," added the doctor.

"I hadn't thought about that," said Kaji, chuckling. "Of course, you'd remember Tokyo-1 before the Second Impact."

Takamura nodded. "And you?"

"A little," replied Kaji, shrugging. "I was only a child when it happened."

Silence settled on the pair, broken only by the chirping of crickets and the lapping of water.

"So, to what do I owe this visit?" asked Takamura finally. "Is my presence required back at NERV?"

"No, I'm not here in my official capacity," replied Kaji. "We should go for a walk."

"Where to?" asked the doctor, suddenly suspicious.

Kaji shrugged. "Anywhere. Let's walk along the shore."

"Sure," said Takamura, rising.

They strolled in silence for a few minutes, heading out towards what remained of the Boso Peninsula. Seabirds dotted the shoreline.

Kaji turned, and smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry about all this, but if we keep moving it'll make it harder for our conversation to be picked up by the parabolics."

Takamura's eyebrows raised. "That serious, eh?"

Kaji nodded. "I bring a warning. Your attempts to dig into the First Child's past have been noticed. Do not persist."

"Or you'll do what?" said the doctor, frowning.

"You misunderstand," said Kaji. "I'm not threatening you. In fact, I believe our interests may coincide in this matter. I, too, am a seeker of truths."

Takamura looked dubious. "I don't know what you mean. I'm no 'seeker of truths'."

"You are," contradicted Kaji, grinning. "You just don't know it yet. But there is a lot more at stake here than you realise. There are certain people that would not hesitate to kill you in order to keep the truth hidden."

"You realise how paranoid that sounds."

Kaji nodded. "There's an saying in the intelligence community, though – 'Just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean the bastards aren't after you.' But I understand. You're a psychiatrist – "

"Psychologist," interrupted Takamura.

"Psychiatrist or psychologist, it doesn't matter. What does matter is that if you continue to think in those terms, then you will almost certainly be killed. There is more at stake here than you realise."

"Yes, the angels – "

"No!" Kaji glanced around, and when he spoke again it was almost a whisper. "More than the angels, though lord knows they're bad enough. Let's assume, for a moment, that the angels are defeated. What then? What will happen to the Evangelion units? What will happen to the pilots? Do you think the project will simply be mothballed?"

Takamura shrugged. "Sure. I guess, when you put it like that – inevitably there is going to be a bit of political maneuvring for possession of the Eva units. They are, after all, advanced weaponry."

"Yes, they are," said Kaji, thoughtfully. "I've begun to wonder, though, if they aren't more than – " Kaji stopped and turned to face the road.

Curious, Takamura stopped and turned to see what Kaji was looking at. The road was empty, though, and he couldn't see anything unusual. He was about to query Kaji, when he began to discern the sound of an engine in the distance. It seemed to be getting closer.

He turned back to Kaji. "What – " But Kaji was no longer there. He walked down to the waterline and scanned up and down the beach, but could find no sign of him.

Takamura turned back to the road. The sound of the engine was getting quite loud. Suddenly, a jeep came around a bend. It slowed down slightly as it passed the point where Takamura was standing. He got a clear look at the driver and the sole passenger, but recognised neither. They looked just like any young couple out for a drive. Perhaps they were trying to find somewhere to park and make out ... in the middle of the working week. What did a NERV intelligence agent look like out of uniform? Or an MP from the JSSDF?

As the jeep sped away, Takamura shook his head. "Now who's being paranoid?" he muttered to himself.

He listened to the cicadas whirring and the rush of the waves on the beach. After a while, he noticed a large white envelope lying on the rocks only a couple of paces away. He examined it closely, but it didn't seem bulky enough to contain anything dangerous. He carefully secreted the envelope underneath his jacket and, as casually and naturally as he could manage, strolled back towards his car.

Inside the car, he laid the envelope on the passenger seat and opened it. Inside were various photos of Gendo, Fuyutsuki-sensei, various personnel in GEHIRN uniforms, and a child that Takamura could only conclude was a very young Rei Ayanami, no more than six years old. With that hair and eye colour, it couldn't be anyone else. The photos were all dated from February to May 2010.

He leafed through the photos a second and third time. The fourth time, he finally realised why Kaji had left him the photos.

Then, with the car's cigarette lighter, he carefully destroyed every one of them.

2.

Takamura glanced around at the gathered crowd. There were a few faces he recognised his days at the University of Tokyo – Fuyutsuki-sensei, Fujita, Seiichi, Soseki, Nakane and, naturally, Gendo Ikari. Fuyutsuki-sensei and Gendo stood off to one side, talking quietly but animatedly. Although he couldn't make out their words, Takamura had the impression they were arguing about something...

"Takamura-san."

Takamura dragged his gaze away from the photo. "I'm sorry, Rei. I'm getting old. It's funny, the older you get, the more you're haunted by your memories. But I'm being self-indulgent."

"I understand," said Rei.

Takamura raised an eyebrow and made a note in his notebook. "Really? What is it you understand?"

"The photo helps you to recall the memory of a signficant event in your life."

Takamura smiled and nodded. "Several significant events, in fact. Do you have something similar?"

Rei looked away. Takamura sensed an unexpected tension in the girl.

"It's all right," added Takamura. "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"Captain Katsuragi has said that I must endeavour to assist you in your appointed task," said Rei, the impassivity of her speech belying the tension in her body. "I possess a pair of Commander Ikari's glasses. They are the ones he was wearing when he rescued me during the failed activation test for Unit Zero. They were damaged by the heat from the entry plug, so he discarded them."

"Really?" said Takamura, making further notes. He wasn't sure what surprised him more – that Rei had kept something out of sentimentality, or that she was willingly telling him about it. "Why do you keep them?"

"I am not certain. Sometimes, when I look at them, I remember how I felt when Commander Ikari opened the hatch of the entry plug."

"And what was that?"

"Again, I am not certain. I felt..." Rei frowned. "I am sorry, Takamura-san. I am not certain. I only know that sometimes, when I look at Commander Ikari's glasses, I feel what I felt that day, when Commander Ikari opened the hatch of the entry plug."

Meaning, of course, that she had nothing to compare the emotion with. Takamura found the idea quite disconcerting, and a little saddening. He made yet another note. "Oh well. Perhaps what you felt is not so important as admitting that you felt it. Is there anything else you'd like to add."

"There was another incident involving Commander Ikari's glasses. Pilot Ikari came to my lodgings to deliver a new NERV idenitification card. Whilst there he had an accident, and Commander Ikari's glasses were... disturbed. I was angry..."

Takamura could sense that, even in Rei's current comparatively expansive mood, there were still things being left unsaid. "Why were you angry?"

"I was not sure at the time. I have thought about it since, and I believe it is because Pilot Ikari disturbed something that was meant to be personal."

"Hmm." Takamura made more notes. "Do you still feel angry towards Shinji for what happened?"

"No. When I thought about it, I realised that the anger I had felt was irrational. No harm was intended by Pilot Ikari."

Takamura chuckled. "That's very magnanimous of you. Rei, I'm glad you feel you can talk to me about these things."

"It was difficult at first," admitted Rei. "I was uncertain what you expected of me. But I understand now. And Commander Fuyutsuki would not have employed you if you were not trustworthy."

"Is that so?" said Takamura. "Well, I'll take that as a compliment... I think. Ah well, we're just about out of time. You might as well head off."

Rei stood and bowed. "Thank you, Takamura-san."

3.

Takamura glanced around at the gathered crowd. There were a few faces he recognised his days at the University of Tokyo – Kouzou Fuyutsuki-sensei, Takane Fujita, Seiichi Imagawa, Fuuka Soseki, Noe Nakane and, naturally, Gendo Ikari. Fuyutsuki-sensei and Gendo stood off to one side, talking quietly but animatedly. Although he couldn't make out their words, Takamura had the impression they were arguing about something.

Fuuka stood near the table that bore Yui's urn. She wore a formal kimono. It struck Takamura as odd – he had never seen her in a kimono before. A young boy-child, seemingly about four years old, clung to the kimono. Takamura was puzzled. He hadn't heard that Fuuka had any children.

He wandered over to her. "Soseki-san."

"Hiroshi-san," she replied.

There were worlds of meaning in those words – grief, loneliness, regret – so much left unsaid. "Who is the young one?" he asked.

"This is Shinji-kun."

He nodded. He and Yui had corresponded for many years, but he hadn't seen her in person for almost a decade, and thus he'd never met her and Gendo's son. He smiled reassuringly at the boy and said, "My name's Hiroshi Takamura. I knew your mother many years ago. I'm very sorry. You must miss your mother very much."

The boy retreated behind Fuuka.

"Poor tyke," said Fuuka, ruefully. "I don't think he understands what has happened. And his father – " A look of anger crossed her face. " – his father doesn't talk to him. He's asked me to look after the boy for a while. I don't mind, of course, but a father ... " She stopped, lost for words.

"Try not to be too hard on Gendo. I'm no fan of the man, but he loved Yui very much. Grief can – "

"Grief?" interrupted Fuuka. "Does he look grief-stricken to you?"

Takamura glanced across at Gendo. It was true, he didn't seem particularly grief-stricken. In fact, he hadn't so much as looked at his wife's urn, nor spoken to any of the guests except Fuyutski-sensei, the entire ceremony. "People grieve in different ways."

Fuuka shook her head. "It's like he doesn't believe she's dead."

Takamura stared at the photo on his bookshelf. It was the one that had captured Rei's attention in her second session with him. It was a photo from Takamura's university days. It was a photo, taken by Fuyutsuki-sensei, of himself, Seiichi, Fujita, Nakane, Soseki and Yui on the lawn outside one of the lecture theatres. None of them had even heard of Gendo Rokubungi, who was still finishing his final year of high school.

Takamura stared at the photo on his bookshelf. It brought back many memories.

It's like he doesn't believe she's dead.

Author's Comments

Wow! The First must be breaking records! By my calculations, I'm writing it at the rip-roaring pace of 3 or 4 words a day.

But seriously, prior to the release of this 'session', The First had obviously been abandoned for some years. As I believe I mentioned in a previous 'session', writing this fanfic was largely a cathartic exercise... and a successful one, at that. Unfortunately, this meant that I no longer had any strong motivation to continue the fanfic. Thus, any 'sessions' that now get completed are largely due to the desire, which comes and goes, not to leave a series entirely unfinished. This isn't helped by the fact that I've moved on. I still watch anime and read manga, but I haven't watched an episode of Neon Genesis Evangelion in years. Lately, however, I've noticed the first couple of volumes of the manga of Neon Genesis Evangelion (published by the wonderful folk at Madman Entertainment) in my local bookstore. I may just give it a look...

I would appreciate any comments on this story (short of hate mail, that is). And look out for Session Six: Three's a Crowd. But don't hold your breath. :-)