Chocolate : Chapter 5 : Beginning from an End
By TearStar
I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho…
14
"I cannot decide this… I will talk to Yusuke."
Ishra nodded and went back into the room.
"Yusuke." –Genkai called authoritatively.
Yusuke swallowed. This is familiar. Something serious is going on, again.
Genkai walked in circles for a good minute, thinking of the right words and manner to say this to Yusuke.
"…Grandma! Please, just tell me what's the matter. You're killing me of nervousness!"
Genkai looked at Yusuke, sympathy obvious in her eyes.
"Yusuke…"
Genkai explained what Ishra told her to Yusuke, with her hand bowed down. During the time of her explanation, she could tell Yusuke was in tears; she just doesn't have the guts to see her pupil, her treated-grandson, Yusuke shedding tears so bitterly.
"…I will leave you to think about it, Yusuke. I'll be in the room."
Genkai's words kept ringing in Yusuke's mind. He cannot believe something like that is possible. He doesn't like the consequence, but there is no other way.
'I'd choose the consequence than have Kurama dead.'
14
Yusuke took his step towards the room so carefully and slowly. This is the first time he did this, think twice. But his love for Kurama made him decide one thing.
"Genkai." –he called. "Can I spend some time with Kurama?"
"Of course. Ishra, let's go out for a while."
"Where've you been, Yusuke? Ishra said I could be healed. Isn't that great!"
"Yes."
"If I get cured, you won't have to watch over me every time my wound hurts. You won't get tired anymore, Yusuke."
"I never grew tired of you, Kurama."
A moment of silence passed them by. But the silence is not something you wouldn't want, it is something warm, something saying…
"…I love you, Yusuke."
"I love you too, Kurama!"
Yusuke's voice broke and tears exploded from his eyes. He embraced Kurama so tight that it hurt.
"Y-Yusuke…"
"S-Sorry… You better get ready for the operation."
"Yes! Pray that it would be a success."
Yusuke didn't nod nor shook his head, honestly, he is blurred again on whether to continue the operation or not.
"This is the best." –Yusuke murmured as he walked out the room.
Genkai greeted him, and he nodded in return; signaling the beginning of the operation.
"Well, thanks to thee, Yusuke. I will begin the operation now."
14
Yusuke ran in the forest. Kneeled, closed his eyes and covered his ears. He wanted to be numb that very moment, or maybe, forever. He imagined visuals of the operation: Kurama being changed of clothing, being laid down on the cot and put to sleep. Then these crazy things followed.
"No… it's just a minor operation… it won't… Kurama…"
Yusuke recalled memories of Kurama, trying to fool himself that everything would be okay for both of them…
14
3 hours passed when finally, a movement in the vicinity was made. Botan ran outside, frantically and excitedly looking for Yusuke to bring him the good news… which she didn't know the detective never actually wanted to hear…
"Yusuke! Hahaha! The operation succeeded!"
Botan finally found the detective, took his hand and spinned them around.
"Oh…" –was all Yusuke said.
Botan noticed and picked up that 'off' feeling. "What's wrong? Aren't you happy about it? Kurama won't cry of his stomach wound again."
"…Happy?" –Yusuke said out loud, blankness displayed in his eyes.
"…Yusuke?"
"Do you know what operation was done to Kurama?"
…Finally, Yusuke was ready to say out loud what the operation was all about…
"Selected time obliteration. It is the only way. It is the erasure of a part of life of the patient. In Kurama's case… the time of his life after he got that wound up until after this operation would be erased… so that the self-argument and wound would be: 'never happened'…meaning, his life in this temple, his life with me would be erased…"
Yusuke's tears welled in his eyes and gave up, flowing freely down his cheeks.
"He would forget about me! For him, the 'I and him' never happened. Me, his boyfriend would be erased from his memory, from his life!... Now, tell me, how could I be happy with that?!?"
14
Hours of convincing led Yusuke walking behind Botan into the temple again.
"Let's see, Yusuke. We never know, maybe he didn't forget. He loves you… Go on, go in there. Confirm this."
Botan pushed the crestfallen Yusuke in the room. 'Oh God, please, make Kurama remember…'
Yusuke was in time to witness Kurama wake up.
"…Yusuke?"
"H-Hello." –Yusuke said, tried hard to keep his voice whole.
"What happened?"
'I told you, Botan. He forgot…'
"Yusuke? What happened?"
"You… got sick."
"You took are of me?"
"…Yes…"
"Thank you. You're a good friend."
Kurama gave him his usual sweet, humble smile. Yusuke didn't let go the said statement that easily, taking special notice on 'friend'… that's what he was in the first place; like before… before he was his boyfriend…
Days passed until they became months, and Yusuke was never the same. He wasn't that fight-picker anymore, he seldom smiles, and his appearance, his aura, matured years ahead; as if he knew everything about this universe and that he was so bored of it all. He tried making Kurama remember, but everytime he does so, he feels like he is bringing back Kurama's sickness, the inner turmoil, and the abdomen wound… Kurama's darkest and most painful time of his life, and he is a part of it… somehow, he felt that bringing it all back to Kurama would cause the fox pain again… he never wanted it: for Kurama to get hurt… and what he witnessed earlier this day put an end to his desire to make Kurama remember him…
"But you could start over again, Yusuke! You don't have to bring back the physical pain to Kurama for him to recognize you. Why not court him like before?" –Botan scolded like a mother.
"…There's no more for me…" –Yusuke said, with that same blankness in his eyes…
"Early this day, when I was filled of desire to make Kurama remember me… I saw him with Hiei in his garden… they looked happy, he looked happy. Then Kurama began to speak… I listened in; I couldn't resist hearing his voice again. Do you know what I heard?"
"What?"
"Kurama said : I love you too, Hiei…"
… With that said, Botan spoke no more.
Wakas…
14
TearStar: there, another ficcy… So, after reading this, try reviewing in your mind the events that followed on the Taguro tournament. I hope you'll see the connection of this fic to Yusuke's small, special, and caring, perhaps loving, attention given to Kurama everytime Hiei wasn't there… that's practically where I draw out this fic. hope you liked it… reviews are very much welcome! So welcome!