Thanks for the reviews. This chapter is the second to last one so I'm hoping that you enjoy the ending. Many times have I wanted to end this story, but I did make it this far, which I am pleased about. A lot of it is thanks to you. I hope to hear from you about how the ending works. So please review.
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Meredith closed her suitcase. She looked down at it for a moment, in shock that this was actually happening to her. Never in her life had she ever thought that something like this would occur, even with all the crappy things she went through. Her whole life had been a wreck, but she always found a way to get through it and move on. Then, just a year ago, the man she loved died and she finally lost it. That had been the last straw. She got through losing her mother and being basically rejected by her father, but Derek was sure. Derek was there no matter how many fights they would ever get in. and when the only sure thing in her life was taken from her…this is what she got for it.
She thought about the first time she met him, just a guy in a bar with a charming smile. And then by fate he ended up being her boss. And then he was more than her boss. It was funny that that was how their relationship ended up being what it was. Her boss for god's sake. That wasn't the type of thing that ever seemed to last, and it never seemed real. But it was. She fell for him and he fell for her. And no matter what nothing was able to change that, even when they wanted it to. There would never be anyone like Derek. He was her one and only McDreamy.
She still found it hard to believe that he was gone, truly gone. And other times it was hard for her to believe that he was ever here in the first place. It was always on her mind and it was always driving her crazy. And really crazy too.
She wished that she would have just found a way to get past this like she did everything else. All she wanted was to get back to her old life again. She wanted to be Meredith, she wanted to be a surgeon. She wanted to be someone who wasn't looked at in fear. She hadn't deserved this at all. But it came back which meant, to her, that it was probably never going to go away.
"Meredith?"
Meredith jumped and turned around quickly. Cristina was in the doorway, waiting for her.
"Are you coming?"
"Yeah," Meredith said quickly, grabbing her bags. "I was just getting my things."
Cristina backed out of the way as Meredith left her room and closed the door behind her. She wondered when the next time she would sleep in that room would be. The room that she had, in many occasions, shared with a man who had literality drove her crazy. It felt weird walking through her own home, knowing that it wasn't going to be here home any more. Everything was so real now. Things were serious. She was actually leaving and didn't know when she was coming back.
"I don't want to leave," Meredith said out loud. Cristina looked at her.
"Yeah," she said, which she found to be her way of responding quite often. "If it makes you feel better, I really don't want you to either."
Meredith looked at her. "Why would that make me feel better?"
"I don't know," Cristina sighed. The thought of not being around her friends, and knowing that they were going to miss her didn't help at all. She felt as if she were dying and this was their final goodbye.
They went down the stairs where George and Izzie were waiting. They both looked depressed themselves and Meredith found herself fighting back tears. She really wasn't ready to do this. She didn't even know if she could do this. But she did know that at this moment she would do anything to turn back time and make this all go away.
"You have your things?" Izzie asked. Meredith could tell that she too was fighting back tears.
"Yeah," Meredith said. "I'm all ready to go."
An awkward silence fell between them. It was broken by Alex coming back into the room.
"They're ready for you," he announced.
Izzie looked down at the floor. Cristina stared at Meredith like she had never seen her before. It did not seem right that her best friend was being sent to a mental hospital. Those things just didn't happen to them.
"We'll still come visit you," George said, trying to think of something that would help.
"Yeah, we will," Izzie added. "We'll still be here if you need us."
Meredith nodded but didn't say anything. Cristina was still looking at her uncertainly. Izzie moved forward and gave Meredith a tight hug.
"Take care of yourself," she said, then pulled away. Meredith still only nodded, unable to speak. George also moved forward and gave her a hug. Meredith closed her eyes and wished that she was somewhere else. She could not take these sad goodbyes.
George pulled away and gave her a small reassuring smile that did not help. Meredith looked at Cristina, who still hadn't looked away.
"Keep yourself out of trouble," Meredith told her, knowing that Cristina was not one to say goodbye.
"Yeah," Cristina said. "You too."
Meredith nodded and walked past her. Cristina turned around and said, "Wait."
Meredith looked back around again. Cristina went up to her and looked determined. She hesitated for a moment, then finally put her arms around Meredith, who was extremely surprised but this sudden gesture of emotion.
"You don't hug," Meredith said.
"Shut up," Cristina said. "I'm your person."
