Not Letting You Go
Chapter 13
"Mr. and Mrs. Eppes," the nurse had looked up as she heard the elevator, "Dr. McDonald wanted to speak with you when you returned." Alan and Margaret stopped next to the nurse's station.
"Is everything alright?" Margaret asked nervously. The nurse was just hanging up the phone, having paged the doctor.
The nurse gave them a reassuring smile. "Yes, he just wanted to talk with you both before you returned to Charlie's room." Margaret couldn't get past the uneasy feeling. She couldn't understand why the doctor wanted to talk to them before getting to the room if everything was okay.
"Alan?"
Alan could hear the underlying fear in his wife's voice. He tried to comfort her. "Margaret if something was wrong, Donnie would have been out here waiting for us." She gave him a slight nod as she thought about the logic of that; yes, Donnie would have met them here. Alan took her in his arms, giving her a comforting hug.
"Alan! Margaret!" An out-of-breath Dr. McDonald approached them from the stairway door. He had come up from the fourth floor. Reluctant to wait for the elevator he had taken the stairs.
"Dr. McDonald! Is Charlie okay?" Alan asked, still keeping a comforting hand on his wife's shoulder. Margaret's nervousness was not lost on the doctor.
"Yes, I'm sorry, I didn't mean for the nurse to worry you when I asked her to stop you before you went into Charlie's room." He started walking that way, Margaret and Alan following quickly behind. The doctor turned toward them as the stopped at the door. "I just wanted you to see," he pushed the door open, "Charlie woke up."
Margaret and Alan gave the doctor a puzzled look as they stepped through the door, it taking a second for the words to register. Then as they looked at the bed, Margaret gave a quiet cry of joy, "Alan!" She whispered, "Oh Alan, Charlie woke up!"
The sight before them was one they had been praying for the past several days. Though Charlie wasn't presently awake, they saw that Donnie was in the bed with his brother, who was curled up next to him, and both were fast asleep. Donnie had his arm around his baby brother, whose head was resting on his chest. It had been years since the boys had been together in the same bed. When Charlie was smaller he would seek refuge in his older brother's bed after a bad dream or if a storm in the night scared him. But now, seeing the boys holding onto one another, Margaret and Alan knew that again the boys were seeking comfort from each other.
Alan turned to Dr. McDonald as Margaret quietly made her way toward the bed, careful not to wake the boys. "How long ago did he wake up?"
"About an hour ago. The nurse noticed his heart rate increase and came to check on him. She found them hugging each other. By the time I got up here, they had fallen asleep like that." The doctor motioned to the bed. "I didn't have the heart to wake them, I'll wait for a bit, then come back and examine Charlie. Honestly though," he smiled at Alan, "I think Charlie's got what he needs the most. He's got his brother. I'll be back in a little while, if you'll excuse me." With that Dr. McDonald left. Alan made his way next to his wife, who was still watching the boys sleep.
"Alan, he's going to get better." Margaret turned, embracing her husband, who held her tight.
"Yes he is." Alan whispered as Margaret cried tears of joy into his chest. Alan looked over the sleeping forms of his sons. He then noticed the small well-loved monkey in Charlie's arm, and saw the long-forgotten book on the bedside table. "That's what you had in the bag." Alan whispered as it occurred to him what Donnie must have brought the duffle bag. Alan smiled, understanding that what Donnie had done. He had found a piece of Charlie's and his childhood, from a time when they had been closer. Not only bringing it to help Charlie but, perhaps, himself as well.
Alan and Margaret took their seats next to the bed, wanting so much to see Charlie's eyes open, but neither having the heart to disturb the boy's slumber.
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"I'm sorry."
Charlie's quiet voice filled the room, causing Alan and Margaret to quickly move to the bed. Margaret reached for his hand. "Charlie? Baby?" she whispered, finally getting a look at those big brown eyes; eyes that had always been able to melt his mother's heart.
Charlie's eyes looked toward Donnie. "Please," he whispered, "don't wake him, he looked so tired." Margaret gave him a smile as her heart swelled, seeing the concern for his brother that Charlie was displaying even though he was the one in the hospital.
Alan, stood next to Margaret and smiled. "How are you feeling son?" He lightly squeezed his son's hand.
Charlie stifled a yawn, "I'm tired."
Alan felt a tear slide down his cheek. "The doctor said you would be. You just rest, we can talk when you're stronger." Margaret kept touching Charlie's face and playing with his hair--tears running down her face as well. "Oh baby, I'm just glad you're awake."
Charlie's eyes started to drift shut again. "I love you both," he whispered again, giving into the sleep his body was craving. Margaret leaned down, kissing his cheek. She turned and embraced Alan again. She had never been so happy to hear her son's voice.
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A couple hours later Dr. McDonald returned and saw that Charlie was still asleep. He turned toward Margaret and Alan. "Has he been asleep the whole time?"
Alan, having stood from the chair near Charlie's bed when the doctor had entered, spoke. "He woke up for just a minute or so a couple hours ago."
"Did he seem coherent? Did he recognize both of you?" the doctor asked.
Alan looked down at Charlie. "Yes, I believe he did. He said he was sorry and asked us not to wake Donnie," Alan couldn't help the small smile that passed over his face when he said that.
Dr. McDonald was making a few notes in Charlie's chart. "Did he say anything about the incident?"
"No, we told him we could talk when he felt better," Alan answered.
Again the quiet of the room was broken by a voice from the bed. "Do you need to wake him up?" Donnie asked, slightly startling those in the room. Dr. McDonald walked a little closer to the bed.
"Yes, I'm afraid that this time I'm going ho have to wake him up to see how responsive he is."
Donnie looked at the doctor, then back to his brother, secretly hating to move from his brother's side. "Do I need to get up?"
The doctor smiled, "Not right now. Would you like to wake him up for me?"
Donnie nodded, then whispered, "Charlie?" He gently shook his brother, "Hey Charlie, the doctor wants to see you." Donnie again shook Charlie's shoulder, who in turn, slowly opened his eyes, meeting his brother's.
"Donnie?"
Donnie smiled, "Yeah, Buddy it's me. Doc wants to see you awake for a minute." Donnie shifted, helping to raise his brother up a little. "You want me to move or stay, Buddy?"
Charlie's eyes looked at Donnie, pleadingly. "Can you stay?"
Donnie nodded his head, giving his brother a reassuring smile. "Sure, if that's what you want."
"Charlie," Dr. McDonald began to speak, "I'm Dr. McDonald. I've been helping to take care of you while you have been here. If it's okay, I'm going to ask you a few questions. They're going to be pretty simple questions, but if you don't remember the answers that is okay; you're still pretty tired, I bet." Charlie nodded as the doctor continued. "Can you tell me your whole name?"
"Charles Edward Eppes."
Dr. McDonald motioned to Alan and Margaret. "Do you know who these people are?"
"My mom and dad, Margaret and Alan Eppes." Charlie gave his parents a shy smile.
"You're doing great Charlie. What about the fella there beside you?" The doctor continued with his notes.
Charlie looked up at his brother, who smiled at him. "This is my big brother Donnie." Donnie squeezed his brother a little.
Dr. McDonald looked at Charlie, smiling, "Good job Charlie. Your family has told me you're good with numbers." The doctor notice a slight spark of something in Charlie's eyes at the mention of numbers. "I hope it's okay if I ask you a couple of questions about some numbers. Would that be okay?" Charlie smiled, eagerly. "Okay, I'll start simple, but if you don't know the answer, it's okay; just do your best. Okay, what's 15x20?"
Donnie saw Charlie roll his eyes, and chuckled slightly. Charlie answered, like anyone should know that answer. "300."
"Too easy?" the doctor asked, smiling.
Charlie returned the smile. "Yeah, just a bit." sounding almost bored. Charlie's comment got a louder chuckle from his brother.
Dr. McDonald continued. "This one is a little tougher; what's 234x651?"
Without hesitation Charlie answered, "152,334." Charlie looked at his parents, who were smiling, tears were in their eyes. Donnie whispered, "Good job." Charlie looked into Donnie's face and even though Donnie was smiling at him, Charlie saw tears in his big brother's eyes too.
The smile that was on his own face faded. "I'm sorry Donnie." he whispered, lowering his head. Donnie gave the doctor a concerned glance.
Dr. McDonald asked, "Charlie, what are you sorry about?"
Charlie studied the stuffed monkey in his lap. "I was stupid," he whispered.
The doctor watched his patient as Charlie began to pick at a loose thread. "About what Charlie?"
Dr. McDonald felt his heart skip slightly at the look of sadness that crossed Charlie's face when he looked up to meet the doctor's eyes. "I didn't think they loved me." His eyes were pleading, his voice cracking with emotion. "How stupid was that?"
Donnie pulled his baby brother close as he felt him shudder next to him. "It's okay Charlie," Donnie whispered, "you were confused, but you're okay now, you're safe now."
Charlie's eyes never left the doctor's. "I'm tired, can I go to sleep now?"
Dr. McDonald took note of the change in Charlie. He knew that Dr. Sanders was better trained to deal with the emotional and mental turmoil going on in the young patient before him. His main concern was his physical well being, which had improved greatly. However he worried about Charlie's emotional well being also. "Sure Charlie, you can sleep now. I'll see you tomorrow."
Charlie leaned back and again smuggled into his brother's side. Donnie tightened his embrace, whispering reassurances that everything would be okay quietly into his ear. Margaret leaned in and kissed her son as his eyes closed and he quickly fell asleep.
Dr. McDonald turned motioning for Alan and Margaret to come into the hall with him. Once they were outside the door he spoke. "It's going to take some time. We'll run a few tests tomorrow, but physically I believe he'll be ready to go home in a day or so. I'll have Dr. Sanders stop by to talk with Charlie tomorrow. As I've said Charlie's overall recovery is going to be a long process." Glancing at the closed door he continued. "But as I've said I believe he's got what he needs to get past this and that is your love and support and that of his brothers. I'll be back in the morning to get his tests started." The doctor smiled kindly as he turned to leave.
As Alan and Margaret reentered the room, they saw Donnie glance up, then return his eyes to his sleeping brother. The doctor had left the family with a mix of emotions: Happiness that Charlie had finally awakened and physically didn't seem retain any ill effects from the drug; fear of what they and Charlie had endured and still must endure; encouraged by Charlie's reliance on his brother and Donnie's willingness to accept that role. Finally, they were hopeful that all of them would make it through this as a family.