Chapter 9

He's marking up the latest draft of the budget the next afternoon when he hears someone say hello and then hears her say hello back. He wasn't expecting her at work until the next day, if at all, so his mind immediately flies to her family and the horrible things they must've said to make her leave Wisconsin early.

He stands up quickly and walks to his door. She's at her desk by then, putting her purse into her bottom drawer and then unbuttoning her coat. He hesitates before walking to where her glass cubicle starts, and watches as she takes the coat off, her hair swishing a little and then landing perfectly around her shoulders. His fists clinch as he remembers the way it slid like silk through his fingers the other night.

"Hey," he says quietly.

She startles just a little bit, and then turns around and smiles warmly at him. "Hi."

He takes a few steps closer to her. "Did something happen?"

"Happen?"

"You're back early," he says in way of explanation.

"Oh," she says, looking at him in some way that he can't really describe. "No, I just had an early morning flight and I…" She blushes slightly and breaks eye contact, causing him to squint his eyes and watch her. He thinks she just said something, but he's not sure what it was, and he wishes she'd finish her sentence. "I'm good, really."

"You're sure?"

She nods and smiles wider. There's something in her eyes; excitement or happiness or… something. "Yep."

He breathes a sigh of release and sits on the edge of her desk. "So, uh…" he trails off and nods with a smirk towards the ridiculous sweater she's wearing. "This is the new sweater?"

She laughs and he finds that he can't remember when she last laughed at him. "It is."

"It's… feathery."

She reaches down and hits the power button on her computer. "I told you it was."

"You could take flight in that thing."

"Are you enjoying this?"

He is, although what he really wants to do is cup her cheek in his hand and kiss her long and deep and slow. "How many birds had to die to make that?"

"Have your fun," she says, doing her best to appear above it all even though she's grinning right along with him. "This is the last time you're going to see it."

"Because it's going to fly away when you take it off?"

"Because I only wore it today to appease my mother, who was touched that I chose to wear it home, and who won't know that it's going to Goodwill tomorrow."

He chuckles and grins and feels better than he has in months.

"Are you done?" she asks with raised eyebrows.

He pretends to ponder this. "For now. I reserve the right to continue later."

"So noted," she deadpans, shaking her head. "Now surely you have some work to do. What'd I miss?"

"Republican leadership sent back the budget proposal; I'm marking it up."

"CJ's giving you the budget?" she asks, both surprise and hope lacing her voice.

He shrugs. "For now."

"Have you told her about…" she trails off and tilts her head not at all subtly.

He finds he's amused by her today, but they can't discuss this here, so he takes her hand and goes into his office. He closes the door behind them and looks at her. "I haven't said anything." His eyes follow hers as she looks down, and he sees that he still has her hand in an awkward grip. He drops it and continues looking at her hand. He liked it better in his.

"Do you think you should?" she asks after a quiet moment.

He wants to take her hand again, softer this time, linking their fingers and rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. He almost has himself talked into it, but then she crosses her arms protectively over her chest, taking away his chance. He closes his eyes for just a second and re-focuses. "I don't know. I haven't heard from him. I don't want to worry her for nothing if it's not going to happen."

"You also don't want to spring it on her at the last second."

He nods. She's right; he's going to have to warn CJ. "What about you?" he asks against his better judgment. "Have you…"

"I told human resources I'm leaving. I'll be training someone new on Thursday and Friday."

"Right," he sighs. He knew that, he reminds himself. "Right."

"But I haven't decided what I'm doing next."

"Ok," he says quietly, biting his tongue so he doesn't say something he's not supposed to say. He's not sure what's off limits right now, except that she seemed freaked out by the hand thing.

She smiles again, which is good he thinks, but is strange. She hasn't done that a lot lately; at least not genuine smiles that make her eyes dance and show her teeth, so he's not sure what to make of it. Maybe visiting her family was good for her after all. Or maybe she's happy that he's not pushing her about the ?xml:namespace prefix st1 ns "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" / Santos thing. But the only reason he's not doing that is because there's nothing to push. It's the day after Christmas at two o'clock in the afternoon and the congressman hasn't called. It's not a good sign.

"How did you manage to keep your office so clean?"

Her question pulls him out of his little reverie and he looks at her. She's looking around the small room.

"I uh… there wasn't anything going on, so I didn't have anything to mess up, I guess."

She chuckles. "So it wasn't an effort on your part."

"Nah."

"That shouldn't surpr…" she trails off and looks back at him. "What's that?"

His eyes widen a bit. "What's what?"

She looks back at him and grins. "The box on your desk wrapped in red and gold paper with a bow on top."

Shit. "It's..." Damn. Damn. Damn. It's her present, at least for the time being. He bought it on Saturday and he's been back and forth on it a thousand times since. In fact, he'd planned to take it back that night.

She walks around the desk and picks up the small square card that came with the wrapping job he paid for. It's almost blank; he hasn't known what to say to her for days, so writing something down hadn't proved easy. But it does have 'Donna' on it, so he's been given away.

"Hmm…" she says, trying to play it cool but not quite hiding that bit of excitement in her voice. "The card has my name on it."

She picks up the box and he winces. "I'm taking it back," he blurts out.

Her head snaps up to his, her eyes wide and her face full of shock. "Oh… I…" She looks mortified now, and hurt, dropping the box and taking a step back, and it takes only a fraction of a second for him to realize what he's said.

"No, I mean…" he takes a step towards her. "To get something else."

"Josh," she says, a fake smile plastered to her face. "You don't have to get me anything. I know I tease you about it, but it's just teasing. You shouldn't feel obligated."

Shit. In the span of five minutes things have gone from great to horrible. How do they keep doing that? "I don't feel obligated," he says, walking around the desk to where she is. "I just…" he sighs audibly. "I didn't know what to get you."

"Oh…kay…"

Wow is he screwing this up. He shakes his head and picks up the package, thrusting it into her hands. "Here."

"What?"

He goes for a smile but it's more of a wince. "Merry Christmas," he says pathetically.

She looks down and stares at the package he's holding out to her, then shakes her head. "No."

"No?"

"You don't want me to have this," she says looking back up at him.

"Yes I do!"

"No," she says, shaking her head back and forth. "You don't."

"I do!"

"Josh!" she shouts.

"Donna, I want you to have it. I went and bought it for you and everything."

"But you just told me you were taking it back."

That's true; he did do that. "Take the gift."

"No."

He makes a strangled noise and leans against his desk. "You give someone something and they refuse to take it from you," he mumbles while unwrapping it. "It's an attaché case," he says without looking at her. "I was going to get a necklace, because your neck is… well, really beautiful and I've always wanted to give you one but it's not really something you give your assistant. But after we… you know… you said that I…" He stops talking and starts pulling at the box flaps. "That I did that… so you'd stay with me, and I didn't want you to think that was what the necklace was for. So I got you this instead. But then I thought you might think it was some sort of jab at you for leaving me. And it's not personal enough, not really, not after… so I was going to go back tonight and get the necklace. Maybe. I wasn't sure yet."

He keeps his head down; he can't look at her now. Not after that. He finally gets the attaché case out of the box and holds it between them. It's black and sleek and smells of leather. "You can get your name engraved on it," he mumbles without looking up. "But it takes two weeks and…"

And then she's kissing him, and damn it feels right.

He stands upright and drops the attaché case somewhere in the vicinity of his desk, ignoring it when it falls to the floor. His hands go quickly around her waist and pull her flush against his body, and he can't believe that after seven years here, he's finally making out with Donna in his office. It's a heady thought that brings up a thousand different fantasies he's had in those seven years, and before he really knows what he's doing, he's got her up against the wall and fuck, her mouth tastes good.

It's the intercom that interrupts them, and it's probably a good thing since the door's unlocked and his shirt's partially unbuttoned. He drops his head to her shoulder and takes a few deep breaths; answering the phone that out of breath would not be wise.

Donna's leaning against the wall cradling his head to her and breathing deeply as well. "I always swore to myself that we'd never do that here," she says chuckling slightly.

He looks up and smirks a little bit. "Funny. I always swore to myself that someday we would."

She shakes her head at him as he backs up and picks up the phone. "Yeah," he says, still watching her.

"Josh, is Donna in there with you? Will Bailey called; he wants to know if she's got a few minutes to meet with the vice-president today."