"What shall we eat first…?" Zetsu asked, more to himself than anyone else.
"Ha, I thought you were going to say WHO shall we eat first." Zetsu laughed.
"That works too." Half of his personality rolled his eyes, the other half licked his lips and stared at the endless amount of food.
"Sir Sousui? I have a question." Kisame stepped over to Pein, who was munching on a chicken wing.
"And that would be…?"
"Why does Amegakure have this festival once a year on this same week?"
"Because this is the only week of the year when it doesn't rain at all. I'd expected you to know that, being in Akatsuki for four years."
"I'm sorry." Kisame kicked the dirt at his feet. But, Pein was right. Being in the Akatsuki for four years and almost always at Base, he should've noticed that it never stops raining there.
"Go eat. I have to talk with Konan." Pein shooed Kisame away to the buffet.
"Zetsu!! NO!! BAD DOG!!" Itachi grabbed a turkey leg and slapped Zetsu in the face. (The oreo-man was eating a bald guy that looked oddly like Kakuzu's photographer. (See 'Many years ago' when I post it.))
"B-b-but he was so scrumptious!! That isn't fair, mother!" Zetsu wailed as Hidan pulled the dead body out of the Kusagakure Ninja's mouth.
"Oh my god! It reeks like decomp. already, un!!" Deidara pinched his nose to keep the rotten smell from reaching his nose.
"You might as well let him finish, unless YOU want to be baldy's replacement, Itachi." Pein called over his shoulder.
"Please, Mother?" Zetsu formed his adorable 'Puppy-dog-eyes-no-jutsu'.
"Fine. But you'd better not expect me to clean up after you."
"Yes sir, Mother!"
"He he… Tobi thinks that sounds funny… 'Yes sir, Mother'." The Masked Moron giggled under his rainbow mask. "It's funny because Mommy's can't be 'sir's'." he giggled again, then looked around to see his comrades staring blankly at him. "What? Does Tobi have a sign on his back? Does it say 'Tobi is a good boy'? Because Tobi is a good boy! If Tobi had a motto, it would be 'Tobi is a good boy'. Right Zetsu-san? What's a motto? Like tomato? Or Potato? Or flamingo? Or mango? Or tango? Or Waltz? Or Foxtrot? Or skank? Or whore? Or—"
Itachi slapped Tobi on the side of the head.
"Something about a whore? What?" Sasori looked up from his plate.
"Tobi was ranting on about things ending in 'o'. Then he said a dance, then whore, un. That's all, Danna."
"Oh. I see." The puppet looked back down at his plate, blushing because the Akatsukis were staring at him because he actually said a whole sentence.
"Alrighty, guys. It's getting late. We'll come back tomorrow. Let's go home." Pein stood up, brushed off, and helped Konan pack the picnic supplies they had brought.