"I swear…these children are going to send me on a one way express elevator to the psych floor…" I groaned as I threw my bag down on the floor where my belongings scattered across the ground in the attending's lounge.

"Mmm…tell me about it…" Izzie added on as she looked up from the couch and flicked a tired gaze in my direction. "Jacob is being so cheeky lately…even George can't handle it…poor Jordy is copping all of his cheekiness and she is just so sensitive…"

"Mia is the same," I told her. "She cries for Derek every night she is away from him…it's just so hard…" I sighed. "I mean, how can I tell a nine year old that her daddy drove his family away…?"

"But Derek didn't drive you away Mer…he begged you for weeks to come back…" Izzie reminded me.

"I know…but we fought so much…" I said softly as I put my head in my hands.

"You both chose to have kids…" Cristina walked in and rolled her eyes at all of the mommy talk.

I laughed bitterly at her insincerity.

"I, on the other hand, am having the best sex ever…Burke and I do not have a care in the world…we can have sex whenever we want at any time of the day!" Cristina said as she picked up the makeup stained tissue that fell out of my bag. "I'm not using tissues by the tonne…" she picked up the cookies. "And I certainly don't have to worry about cookies and PTA committees!"

I stuffed one of Izzie's cookies in my mouth.

"The cookies are really, really good!" I told her with a mouthful of food.

I quickly changed into my scrubs as I continued to talk to Izzie about the upcoming events in the school that Mia, Riley and the twins attended. I reached out for an elastic to tie back my hair.

"Are the twins in the school play?" I asked Izzie as I pulled my hair back from my face.

"Yeah, Jacob is high and mighty on being a roadie…he's putting together some light show on his computer and mastering some crap about moving the equipment…" Izzie explained. "And Jordin is singing constantly because she's hell bent on the fact that she needs the practice…"

"Yeah, Mia is singing too!" I answered. "I never realised how pretty her voice was…"

"Fancy doing High School Musical in middle school!" Izzie groaned. "I swear that CD gets more air time in our stereo than the Clash used to get when…oh…I…"

"It's okay, there are a lot of memories of Derek and I at that house…" I told her.

"But if I hear that song Breaking Free one more time…I will…ohhh, it just makes me so mad!" Izzie whined.

I laughed as I started to walk away.

"We're soaring…" I sang.

Izzie screeched in frustration.

"Shut up!" she yelled.

I poked my head around the door.

"Flying…"

And then, before I could anticipate what was about to happen, a muffin came flying in my direction and I ducked to miss it as it nearly hit my face.

I started to walk away as I laughed before I could react to what was now about to happen, I ran into Derek.

"Crap!" I cried. "Oh, I mean…hi…"

Derek shuffled uncomfortably.

"How are the kids?" he asked.

"Fine…" I said equally as awkward. "Mia misses you…"

"Charlie…um…left her cell charger…I have it, it's um…"

"Yeah I know,"

"The play…it's um…great!"

"Yeah, Mia is really excited…"

"Are the twins in it?"

"Yep…"

"GREY!"

I whipped around to see Bailey and breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"Yes Dr. Bailey?"

"I need a consult on a trauma that's just come in, can I borrow you?" she eyed Derek suspiciously.

"Sure thing!" I replied quickly. I turned to Derek. "Um…bye…"

Derek sighed and fought his urge to do more than stand there.

"Bye…"

Bailey and I headed for the pit and climbed onto the elevator.

"Thank you so much," I said to her.

"How are you?" she asked me sincerely.

"Life sucks," I answered.

She nodded.

"How are the kids?"

"They miss Derek…Charlie is just, well, she's a teenager…but her and Riley at the moment fight so badly that I am ready to kill them both!" I told Bailey.

Bailey chuckled.

"Tucker is the same…it's just the age…" she said to me.

The elevator dinged and we walked over to the trauma room where I entered.

I peered over at the films.

"Yeah, it's a subdural haematoma…" I muttered as I pointed to the clot in the scan. "I'll need to go in…"

Bailey nodded.

"I'll book the OR," she said.

I nodded.

As I walked back to the nurses' station, my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Dr. Shepherd?"

I groaned to myself.

"Yes…"

"This is Principal Leeman calling from Seattle East High School…"

My eyes widened.

"Is there a problem?"

"Yes, I am afraid so…"

"Smoking?" I yelled as I came through the door of the principal's office at Charlie's school to find her sitting there smacking chewing gum rudely.

"I was holding it for a friend!" Charlie shot back.

"I have a major surgery today Charlie, and now you are going to have to come back to the hospital with me!" I told her.

"Dr. Shepherd, please have a seat…" Principal Leeman told me.

I sat down and frowned at Charlie, hard to believe that this could happen…

"I'm afraid I'll have to suspend you from school for three days Charlie, it's just not good enough…your grades are a matter of concern too and with drivers' ed coming up, I am just not sure that you are responsible enough to take the subjects…" he said to us.

"Seriously?" Charlie cried.

I grabbed her arm and squeezed it.

"Stop back chatting!" I told her.

"I will expect you back here on Thursday in my office at 9 a.m."

I nodded and shook his hand.

"Thank you, and we will certainly fix this problem," I promised. I whipped around and took Charlie's arm. "Let's go,"

She sat sullenly in the car and pulled her knees up around her chest with a stubborn look in her eyes.

"Smoking Charlie?" I cried.

Charlie shrugged.

"What possessed you? Do you know how many people come into the hospital to have lungs removed from lung cancer…?" I asked her as I shook my head.

"Relax mom!" Charlie cried.

"Relax?" I exclaimed as I pulled to the side of the road and slammed on the breaks. "Charlotte Shepherd! You have no idea what sort of harm smoking does to your body…if I ever, ever find out that you are smoking again, you will be in so much trouble that you will never be allowed out again!"

"Sorry mom…" she sighed.

I looked over to see tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry…I didn't want to yell…" I said softly as I reached over to touch her arm. "I don't like being mad at you…but sometimes you leave me no choice…"

"What about dad?" she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Who is going to tell him?"

"About you smoking…um that would be you!" I said.

"What…?" Charlie cried. "Mom!"

"Sorry babe, but your dad doesn't need another reason to be angry at me!" I told her. I poked her gently. "But you know he can't be angry at you for long…"

Charlie groaned as I continued to drive; we pulled up at the hospital and got out of the car. We approached the doors and Charlie stopped.

"Come on," I sighed as I put my arm around her.

We waited for the elevator and when it arrived we climbed on it, waiting for it to take us to the floor where Derek's office was.

Charlie knocked on his door.

"Dad…" she called.

Derek opened the door and his eyes widened.

"Hey sweetie, what are you doing?" he asked hugging her. "Are you sick?"

I shook my head.

"I have to tell you something dad…" Charlie said.

I looked at him with pleading eyes as he stepped aside to let us into the office.

"So, talk to me…" he said eyeing me suspiciously.

"Well I kind of got suspended…" Charlie said.

Derek's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.

"What for?" he cried jumping up out of his chair.

"Umm…smoking…" Charlie mumbled.

"Smoking?" Derek yelled.

"Derek…calm down," I told him.

"Do you know how many lungs we take out every year because of lung cancer that is caused by smoking?" Derek shouted. His face had turned bright red and veins were popping out all over the place.

"Dad…I'm sorry…" Charlie started to cry.

"Yes, and you're grounded!" Derek told her angrily. "I am so disappointed in you Charlie…"

Charlie started sobbing and jumped up as she ran for the door.

"Charlie!" I called after her as the door slammed behind her. I turned to Derek and shook my head. "She made a bad decision…at some point in our lives…we all do that Derek,"

Derek's eyes flared with anger as his blue looked ever so sad.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he snapped.

"You and I made a lot of bad decisions!" I shot back. Separation was by far the worst…

I darted my eyes to lock with his in a gaze full of unspoken emotions.

As I left the office, Charlie had already begun to make her way down to the cafeteria where she ran straight into Mark.

"Charlie!" Mark was startled. "What are you doing here babe?"

"I got suspended from school," Charlie told him.

"Whoa!" Mark chuckled. "What for?"

"Smoking…" Charlie grumbled.

Mark's eyes widened.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he cried.

"Oh please, not you too!" Charlie's eyes welled with tears.

Mark sighed heavily and put his arm around her.

"Charlie, I am not going to yell at you because I'm sure your dad has already gone ballistic, but don't ever smoke again!" Mark warned. "Now, do you want a hot chocolate? My treat,"

Charlie managed a smile.

"Got a cool surgery today?" she asked him as they collected their drinks.

"A hemiglossectomy at two," Mark replied.

"Cool, can I watch from the gallery?" Charlie asked.

"Clear it with your dad," Mark told her. "I've gotta go, but I'll see you soon…and no more smoking!"

Charlie smiled.

I saw her from down the hallway and made my way over to her.

"Honey, I need you to find a spot out of the way and make a start on your homework," I told her.

Charlie groaned.

"Hurry up…" I said again.

As she went to walk away I grabbed her arms.

"Hey…" I tilted her chin so she could look up. "I love you, no matter what you do…"

"Love you too mom…"

But how could love stop my little girl from making such bad mistakes? I mean, they say mistakes help us learn…but I certainly didn't want her to make a fatal mistake and get hurt.

This is the beginning of a very big rollercoaster ride with Charlie!! Be prepared for a lot worse!

As always, REVIEWS!!

Amy.