LATER AT THE AVENGER'S MANSION
Iron Man is holding a meeting with his fellow Avengers, which include his best friend War Machine, The Wasp, Hawkeye, Spider-woman, She-Hulk, Ms. Marvel, Giant Man, and the Sentry.
"My fellow Avengers, as your leader I suggest we allow a new member into our team, the Silver Surfer." announced Iron Man.
"Are you crazy!?" yelled Spider-woman.
"What's wrong?" questioned Iron Man.
"That guy's an asshole." said Ms. Marvel. "Everytime we see him he's always trying to steal our food or the food we're trying to give away."
"Plus, whenever we ask him about it he just tells us to go fuck ourselves." said Spider-woman.
"W-Well that doesn't matter because I'm your leader and you guys have to do what I tell you." stammered Iron Man.
"That may be true," said War Machine "but the last time the Surfer left Galactus' presence, his stomach growls and moaning of the word hunger could be heard throughout the Earth.
"Well..." Iron Man thought for a moment, "Would any of you argue against having a dinner for him in his honor?"
"Hmmmm...no." the Avengers quickly answered in unison.
...
ELSEWHERE IN SPACE
Silver Surfer is in Galactus' fortress, in front of a giant t.v.
"Turn on the t.v. herald, you know Galactus can not go on without Oprah." the former force of nature now turned Universal fat-ass commanded.
"Can't see how, you pretty much are Oprah you fat fuck!" muttered Silver Surfer as he turned on the t.v.
"What was that you said?"
"Nothing." Silver Surfer said. A cell phone is then heard ringing. "Just a minute."
Silver Surfer takes the cell phone out of his surf board and answers. "Hello."
"Hey Surfer." Iron Man said on the other line. "I just wanted to let you know that tonight we're having a dinner in your honor."
"That's nice Iron Man but I'm gonna have to tell you to fuck off." the Surfer calmly, yet rudely answered.
"What! Why?" Iron Man questioned sadly.
"Because your goodie little 2-shoe Avengers won't leave me alone about the missing food from the "Lobsters and Steak for Africa" drive." the disgruntled surfer of the galaxy explained.
"B-But there's a feast just for you." Iron Man tried to convince him."There's pot roast."
"What the fuck am I gonna do with pot roast?" the Surfer yelled loud enough to catch Galactus' attention.
"WAIT! What is this I hear about pot roast?"
"Put me on speaker phone." Iron Man demanded and Silver Surfer did so.
"Yes Galactus, pot roast just for your hearald. There's also lobster, pasta, salmon, turkey,duck, and also baked potatoes, mushrooms, garlic bread, and a whole plate of actual tacos." Hearing of this feast fit for kings (or one of those fat kids you see on Maury) makes Galactus drool.
"Go my herald! The hunger of Galactus has returned!"
"You just ate an hour ago!" Silver Surfer tried to install some sense into his master. His only reply was Galactus grabbing the Silver Surfer and holding him up to his face.
"Do not question me, for if Galactus does not get the feast promised to his herald, you my Silver Surfer shall become his meal." threatend Galactus.
"Then you'd have to find another herald." the Surfer always knew better.
"True, well bring me the feast or suffer through a marathon of "Hannah Montana" and "The Wizards of Waverly Place." this threat actually scares the Silver Surfer.
"I'll get going." the Silver Surfer flies to Earth.
"Heh-heh, that threat works all the time." said Galactus.
Disclaimer: I still own nothing.