Later
Deadpool is inside the store, counting money and watching t.v.
"In other news, the unstoppable Juggernaut was apprehended today by the hulk-busters for the rape and second-degree murder of Jubilation Lee, a.k.a Jubilee." the news castor said.
"I swear, I thought those were screams of pleasure!" the Juggernaut screamed as he was being pushed into a swat car. Deadpool couldn't do anything but laugh at the pathetic sight.
"Deadpool." said an unseen, female voice.
"Who's there?" Deadpool asked, looking around.
"Up here."
Deadpool looks up to see the Black Cat clinging to the roof. She then let's go and lands on the floor, in front of the counter.
"Oh, hey there Black Pussy, how can I help you?" Deadpool asked as kindly as he could.
"First off, where's Spider-man?" she asks.
"Down there." Deadpool pointed underneath himself.
Black Cat looks down to see Spider-man with his shirt off, rubbing himself.
"Hmmmm, Black Cat." Spider-man muttered in exstacy.
"Is he..." she began.
"No, no, he's just fantasizing about petting little kitties." Deadpool tried to defend his friend but Black Cat just looked at him disbelievingly. "Okay so he's fantasizing about eating your pussy, you should be grateful."
"That doesn't matter, what matters is are you a little worried about this whole drug craze?" she asked.
"If it makes people happy then who am I to judge them." Deadpool responded.
"Well, what if they become addicted?" she asked sternly.
"Well then, who am I to deny them service."
"You deny people service when they want to buy food." she countered.
"Your point?"
Knowing the type of person Deadpool was, Black Cat came to one single conclusion. "You're not going to take responsibility for this at all, are you?"
"What responsibility?" he questioned in defense. "Everyone's happy and I'm making tons of money. The latter is more important."
"Everyone's happy, even the Silver Surfer?" Black Cat questioned.
"He's fine."
"God damn it, eiether kill me or get me off this damn thing!" Silver Surfer yelled from across the store, still strapped to the gurney and still having his skin scraped off.
"See, perfectly fine." Deadpool said calmly, as Black Cat looked in shock as the Silver Surfer is being tortured. But the scene is ruined once Deadpool's cellphone rings. "Hello?"
"I'm in the store, do you know where I am?" the metallic voice asked.
"Ghostface you're behind the fucking twinkie rack!" Deadpool yelled at his phone.
"How do you know that?" Ghostface asked nervously, knowing that his hiding place wasn't hiding anything.
"It's a rack dumbass!" After Deadpool yelled this, Ghostface comes out of his hiding place with his head hanged low.
"You guys aren't scared, even a little bit?"
"Dickhead, after 3 movies you've lost whatever originality or scaryness you ever had. Jason Vorhees is scarier drinking a cup of coffee." Deadpool yelled, but he takes a look out the window, screams, and hides behind Black Cat, shivering.
"Close the shutters!" he demanded.
"Why?" Black Cat asked.
"It's scary out there." Black Cat walks to the window, and she sees Jason Vorhees drinking coffee. He waves politely at her and she waves back smiling and closes the shutters.
"It's gone." she said reassuringly. Deadpool stops shivering and straightens himself up.
"As for you," Deadpool pointed at Ghostface."get out and get a day job."
"I do..." Ghostface said assertively and took out a plate of bagels."You guys want some bagels."
Deadpool smacks the bagels out of Ghostface's hands. "Now get out! Oh, wait a minute." Deadpool pants Ghostface to reveal that he's wearing pink, unicorn covered boxers. "Now march."
Ghostface leaves the store with his shoulders slumped. Once he's out, Jason comes up to Ghostface and puts his arm around him reassuringly.
"Wasn't that a little mean, even for you?" Black Cat asked in Ghostface's defense.
"What, the first time that asshole called he got me out of the shower 7 times, 7 TIMES!" Deadpool explained.
"I probably would've bought a bagel." said Black Cat.