The Next Day at the Court House

Deadpool and Silver Surfer are both on trial with the whole town in attendance. And the towns people aren't happy, with yells of "Hang them!", "Burn them!", and "Fry them!". Silver Surfer is on the stand.

"Mr. Surfer," the judge began,"you've been charged with causing mass hysteria across the city, how do you plead?"

"Not guilty dude." once the Surfer said this, the towns people all boo and start throwing garbage at the stand but it all hits Deadpool.

"Hey, watch where you're aiming!" yelled Deadpool and he got knocked out by a rock.

"Well you don't have a lawyer with you, so I suggest you to defend the evidence against you." the judge said.

"I will." the Silver Surfer began. "You can't blame me because the truth is that you all took my skin because you all couldn't face reality. The reality that no matter what you all do, life will always suck and you all wanted an escape. Whether it was an escape from your crummy jobs, the fact that you can't be a superhero anymore, or that you have no balls..."

Spider-man hears the last part and he looks down at his feet.

"...or the fact that you're a filthy drunk who can't enjoy his pleasures anymore..."

Iron Man bows his head in shame.

"...or the fact that most people are afraid to sleep with you."

She-Hulk hears this, she looks around confused and points to herself in question.

"Yes you She-Hulk, let the man be on top for once, bitch!" yelled Silver Surfer. "The point is no matter what you do, in the end you can't just escape reality, you have to take it as it is. I learned that as soon as someone introduced junk food to Galactus." After the Silver Surfer's speech everyone in the courtroom just sat down stunned.

"Well Mr. Surfer, you're the first person I've ever heard to bring up personnal responsibility in court." the judge said amazed. "Therefore, in causing the mass hysteria I find you not guilty, however you and Deadpool both sold the drug and you, yourself said you caused the mass hysteria in retaliation, I sentence you both to community service."

"Okay." the Silver Surfer said not caring.

"I got nothing to complain about." Deadpool said. "Can I be let out of these cuffs now?"

"Now, about the missing rice to Africa..." the judge began, looking over some papers.

"Oh no, you can not blame that on me, Galactus hates healthy food." the Silver Surfer defended himself.

"I know," the judge said, "the witnesses said that the culprit was 6'3, completely black, white eyes, razor-sharp teeth, and had a 2-3 ft tounge."

Everyone in the courtroom look at Venom, who's eating a bowl of rice.

"WHAT!?" Venom questioned, feeling threatend. "You can't pin this on me, you're all crazy, crazy I say!"

Carnage comes into the courtroom, with a group of African children who're holding flamethrowers.

"There's the man who stole your rice children." Carnage pointed at Venom. "Get'em!"

"Aaaah!" Venom screamed and ran as the African kids chase him. Venom climbs up a podium and the kids start shooting flames at him.

"No, bad niggers, bad niggers!" Venom yelled to the kids, barely dodging the flames.

Spider-man, Deadpool, Black Cat, Silver Surfer, and Iron Man all walk out of the courthouse.

"You know Silver Surfer, thanks to you I think I'm gonna make some changes in my life." Iron Man said proudly.

"Whatever." Silver Surfer muttered, not caring.

"No really, from now on, I'm not going to alter my reality just to enjoy li-"

"DAMN IT IRON DICK I DON'T CARE!" Silver Surfer yelled, still feeling hostile towards Iron Man for using him.

"Fine." Iron Man muttered, but saw something that made him perk up. "Oooo, daisies." Iron Man skipped towards the daisy field.

"And I'm going to change something too." Spider-man said and turned to Black Cat. "You want to go out some time?"

"Sure."

"So Surfer, we cool?" Deadpool asked, not wishing to lose one of his only friends.

"Just give me some free twinkees and we'll be fine." the Surfer said, being more forgiving towards Deadpool.

"Aaaah, look at that you guys..." Deadpool pointed at Iron Man, sniffing daisies. "he's getting high on life."

Even though the sight was something out of an old disney movie, things start to get strange when he starts sniffing more and more flowers.

"He's getting really high on life." Spider-man said disturbed. Iron Man starts to grab flowers by the hand full and sniffing them.

"He's getting wasted on life." Black Cat said shocked. Iron Man starts to foam at the mouth and falls to his side. War Machine comes out and slaps himself in the face.

"Oh crap."

In Iron Man's daisy hallucination, he's dancing in a black muscle car with the Beer God riding shotgun.

It's your one way ticket to midnight
Call it Heavy Metal

"Now my friend, drink, drink and drive, there's enough beer in me to last you 1000 lifetimes!" the Beer God began to pour beer from his mouth into Iron Man's mouth.

Higher than high, feelin' just right
Call it Heavy Metal
Desperation on a red line

Iron Man starts driving through space drunk, crashing into planets destroying them in the process.

"I'M SO HAPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Iron Man yelled as he drove into a wormhole which turns into a mixture of the color of beer when Iron Man barfs in it.

Call it Heavy Metal

A/N: there'll be an epilouge so stay tuned.

Song used: Heavy Metal by Sammy Hagar.