PP 35th Turn, early winter, Fort Weyr

N'ton looked out over his wings, beautifully assembled for Fall. In some ways, N'ton adidn't envy these young dragonriders who would have so many years ahead of them, after Fall, after Thread was gone forever. N'ton was himself not an old man, and even though he knew it would be an adjustment, he'd have many years of fighting Thread under his belt—he would be ready to retire from the fight. These young riders would still be under the high of fighting. They were also the next generation, the generation that would really have to start the post-Thread dragon life.

Lioth bugled and N'ton gave the signal to go between. One more Thread down, though N'ton as they blinked between.

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Later that week…

S'wan woke up far earlier than he intended. He hadn't slept well the last couple months. Nothing had been resolved between him and T'pin. Things hadn't changed as much as they hadn't changed. T'pin was no less friendly with S'wan or less flirtatious than before the mating flight. Nor did T'pin ignore that the mating flight had occurred. But, he no longer sought out S'wan's company. However, Their dragons were quite attached now. S'wan couldn't read T'pin. He felt he'd made his feelings clear that afternoon of the flight. He'd thought those feelings were reciprocated. But, he certainly wasn't going to make a fool of himself if T'pin wasn't interested.

He'd talked to Telesa about it and she did not have much advice for him. She rarely spoke to T'pin away from S'wan. She was curious, though, because she had thought T'pin's feelings for S'wan were genuine. S'wan had wondered if maybe T'pin hadn't found the experience satisfactory. At that, Telesa snorted. Not likely, she had said, considering the dragon involvement.

Talk to him. He is on your thoughts often.

Am I on his?

Amanath will not tell me.

S'wan sighed. He would need to deal with this on his own. He'd spent the last two months avoiding it, pretending as T'pin did that everything was normal and that their friendship was as easy as it'd ever been. Had it ever been easy? Looking back, he realized that his own ignorance of his own feelings had caused tension and most likely, pain, for both of them that S'wan wasn't even aware of. He desperately wanted to be back in the place he'd been that day of the flight. It wasn't only that he wanted to be back in T'pin's weyr—he did—but more importantly, he wanted to be a more important part of the greenrider's life. He wanted to be confided in, to be able to confide. In the couple months that he'd been fighting Thread, S'wan felt he'd aged years. He was no longer a lad of sixteen turns, but a man of sixteen turns. He wanted the calming quiet strength that T'pin exuded to be his to come back to at the end of a long day.

Sharra wants to know if you'd bring her to Landing.

Can't Ruth do it?

If he could, would she ask?

I know that, Ren, but why can't Ruth bring her?

Jaxom is busy.

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"Mother, what is so urgent?" S'wan asked as he ran into Ruatha. She had a disturbed look on her face and S'wan's heart leaped. He sensed something was wrong, but he couldn't tell how severe by her face. She explained as they mounted Renath.

"Your father's fine, Shawan," in her hurry she forgot to shorten her child's name to the honorific, "he just can't leave landing and neither can Ruth. The watchdragon is away on an errand. There have been reports from Honshu of irregular activity in the skies. We're not sure if it's anything serious, but we're holding an emergency council."

S'wan did not want to be an astronomer. He knew that many, many dragonriders would be taking on that career After. S'wan had no interest in the skies beyond his dragon and flying Thread. He knew that he should be spending his spare time between Falls figuring out just what he might do. He knew that he could most likely return to Ruatha and hold, but would that be enough? Most likely not. He'd need to find a craft.

When they came out from between, S'wan had difficulty finding a place to land. His mother asked him to stay, because she wasn't sure if she'd need him again. She offered for him to join her, but he much preferred staying outside. Well, that was something he knew at least.

He surveyed his surroundings. He saw the injured Golanth and a large green dragon that he supposed could only be his weyrmate. He'd heard all about the injury from his father when it happened; his father and F'lessan were old friends. He was amazed to see the dragon here, but realized that draconic dignity could overcome almost anything.

Golanth does well Renath remarked Zaranth helps him. They work well together. There was a tone in his dragon's voice that caused his rider to think that perhaps he was thinking of Amanath. It saddened him to think that dragon was as wistful as rider. Amanath and Renath still spent much time together, but S'wan knew there was a strain, as both riders had asked the dragons to keep certain things from each other.

Sharra says we can leave. Nothing will be resolved tonight.

Take us back to Fort Weyr, then, Renath!

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S'wan was surprised to find T'pin in his weyr when Renath returned them to the ledge. His thoughts flew back to the night before Amanath's flight. This time, though, since Amanath was not proddy, T'pin was much calmer.

"What are you doing in my weyr?" His tone was harsher than he intended. His nervousness affected him. He smiled apologetically to try to offset the tone.

"I need to explain myself. Amanath tells me that I've got you and Renath very upset. No, don't stop me. You know I care for you, S'wan. You have to know that. It's just, we're so young, S'wan."

"Why does that matter?" S'wan's voice was shaking.

Careful. It was not Renath who spoke to S'wan.

"I'm not ready to settle down."

"I'm not asking you to!"

T'pin sighed, very frustrated with how things were going.

"Do you want other bedmates? Is that it?"

"No…"

"You're not making any sense. Please, give me a good reason," S'wan didn't even care that he was pleading now; he didn't mind his less than dignified tone.

"I'm afraid! S'wan, I'm afraid. We've still got a decade of Thread!"

It will be okay now spoke Amanath again. S'wan didn't need the dragon's encouragement. He didn't think anyone could have stopped him. T'pin was trembling, shaking with tears he couldn't let fall. S'wan felt an irrepressible need to wrap the greenrider in his arms. He knew that the greenrider needed him to. Before S'wan could fill all the space between them, T'pin collapsed into his arms. S'wan rocked him back and forth, trying to assure him that everything would be fine. In these times, these years of Thread, and then the uncertainty after, it was so important to have someone to talk to.

When T'pin had calmed down a bit, S'wan spoke again, "Look, T'pin, I will be whatever you want us to be. I just want it so you feel comfortable to talk to me! I want to be here for you, when you need me. Is that okay?"

T'pin laughed, wiping some tears from his eyes, "Yes."