Disclaimer: Me no own, you no sue.
Note: So, I've done No Place Like London, The Worst Pies In London, Johanna (1st Time), and Johanna (2nd Time) (The 1st Time Johanna is entitled 'Stop Stalking Me!' and can be found under my stories). I'm having intense writer's block, and I need you guys to request the next song to do. This one might suck. It's Poor Things…
Chapter 4: OH THE UNHAPPY ENDING!
Blah blah blah…room over shop…haunted…stuff that happened a long time ago…not very nice…blah blah blah…
L: "There was a barber and his wife…"
S: "I thought I already said that? Like, two songs ago?"
L: "And he was beautiful…"
S: "OK…not creepy at all…"
L: "A proper artist with a knife…"
S: "Um…I feel…uncomfortable…"
L: "But they transported him for life…"
S: "Curse the ever-present 'they'!"
L: "And he was beautiful…"
S: "Are you stalking me?"
Blah blah blah…Benjamin Barker…crime…foolishness…blah blah blah…
L: "He had this wife you see…"
S: (eye twitch) "Lucy! No, I'm not supposed to know that…"
L: "Pretty little thing…silly little nit…"
S: "Are you implying she was stupid? No she wasn't! Wait, yeah she was…"
L: "Had her chance for the moon on a string…"
S: "Am I the only one who wonders what that even means?"
L: "Poor thing. Poor thing."
S: "Suddenly, I get the feeling that this does not have a happy ending…"
L: "There was this Judge, you see…"
S: (eye twitch) "Grr…I do not like where this is going…"
L: "Wanted her like mad…"
S: "I am liking this less and less…"
L: "Every day he'd send her a flower…"
S: "This is significant…how?"
L: "But did she come down from her tower?"
S: "No…"
L: "Sat up there and sobbed by the hour…"
S: "My poor Lucy!" (sob) "Oh wait, you aren't supposed to know that. My bad…"
L: "Poor fool…"
S: (still crying) "But she was my fool!" (sob)
L: "Ah, there was worse yet to come…Poor thing…"
S: "OK, I am starting to hate this song…"
L: "The Beadle calls on her all polite, poor thing, poor thing."
S: "The Judge's bitch? That guy? Peter, isn't that his name?"
L: "The Judge, he tells her, is all contrite…"
S: "Liar!"
L: "He blames himself for her dreadful plight…"
S: "That's because it was ALL HIS FAULT!"
L: "She must come straight to his house tonight! Poor thing! Poor thing!"
S: "Rapid change in tempo! NOOOO! THIS IS NOT GOOD!"
L: "Of course when she gets there, poor thing, poor thing…"
S: "WHY? WHAT HAPPENED?" (Goes into hysterics)
L: "They're having this ball all in masks…"
S: "MASKS? NO!"
L: "There's no one she knows there, poor dear, poor thing…"
S: "OH THE BUILDUP!"
L: "She wanders, tormented, and drinks, poor thing."
S: "OH THE ANTICIPATION!"
L: "The Judge has repented, she thinks, poor thing!"
S: "OH THE FOREBODING!"
L: " "Oh where is Judge Turpin?" she asks. He was there alright, only not so contrite!"
S: "OH THE DARK PROSPECTS!"
L: "She wasn't no match for such craft you see, and everyone thought it so droll. They figured she had to be daft, you see, so all of them stood there and laughed, you see. Poor soul! Poor thing!"
S: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Blah blah blah…no one…mercy…Benjamin Barker…he's dead…Sweeney Todd…revenge…blah blah blah…
S: "OH THE UNHAPPY ENDING!" (cries)
I love reviews. It would be an unhappy ending if you didn't review, and then Sweeney would cry. You don't want to see him cry more, now do you? I thought not. Oh, and I am so happy! I finished it in a day! Yea!