Eragon- what Really Happened

I Love you, Mr. Heavy!

Eragon was really bored. He was at home in Carvahall watching TV with his uncle Garrow.

"—el oso es rojo por—"

"—and Galbatorix is being a real pain in the—"

"—makes your skin--"

"--DucksDucksDucksDucksDucks –"

"—here comes Bob with the ball—

"Oh! Said Eragon to Garrow, jumping up and down and pointing at the TV. "Go back! Go back!" Giving Eragon a creeped-out glance, Garrow went back a channel.

"--DucksDucksDuckDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucksDucks—"

"Eragon, go get me some food. I very hungwee." Said Garrow.

"Why?" Eragon asked, really annoyed.

"I dunno, its part of the plot. Now go!"

"Gosh!" said Eragon and he went outside and into the woods with his trusty AK47. He was stalking a squirrel when there was a flash of light an Eragon's eyebrows burned off. He ventured closer to where the explosion had come from. In the middle of a smoldering hole, a polished blue rock sat, smoking.

"Ohhh! A rock! Hello, rock! I shall call you Mr. Heavy. Come on, Mr. Heavy! Let's go catch some squirrellys!"

Eragon picked up the rock, or Mr. Heavy, and walked off into the forest. They caught some squirrels and brought them home to Garrow.

"Here are your squirrels, uncle Garrow. I'm going to my room now." Eragon threw a squirrel at Garrow, and then went to his room.

The next week was spent frolicking about with Mr. Heavy in Eragon's room. He did not eat and spent every minute dancing with Mr. Heavy, feeding Mr. Heavy, pretending Mr. Heavy was a baby, and getting beat at video games by Mr. Heavy. One night Eragon and Mr. Heavy were playing Eragon's new game : Super Awesome Pink and Fluffy and Super Pink Powder Puff Slumber Party 2: Night of the Night You Get a Nail Polish Stain. Mr. Heavy was totally beating Eragon at the cucumber mask minigame.

Eragon was about to go to bed, when Mr. Heavy started to shake. The blue rock rolled around on the floor, vibrating.

"Mr. Heavy! Are you having convulsions? Are you on drugs? You know I don't like it when you do drugs without asking me! Mr. Heavy! Mr. Heavy!!!!!"

Apparently Mr. Heavy didn't hear him. Long cracks appeared on the rock. The cracks grew, until the rock finally exploded, and out popped a creepy- looking lizard thing.

"Mr. Heavy? You were an egg? Aw, come on, you have to tell me these things!" said Eragon. The lizard just made a weird growly purring noise. "What are you, anyway, Mr. Heavy?"Eragon looked at Mr. Heavy and tilted his head, thinking.

"I know! You're a unicorn! Wow! I never thought I would meet a unicorn before! And I certainly never thought you were one, Mr. Heavy! Hm, you know, I don't know anything about you. I should probably look up how to take care of you, and stuff."

Eragon went to his computer to look up unicorns, but he ended up playing Runescape instead. It had been five hours when something weird happened. This is Eragon's diary entry for that day.

26 February

Ok, so here I am just minding my own business, you know, playing with my unicorn, and playing Runescape, and then all of a sudden, this crazy old dude with a knife crashes through my window, screaming his head off! So his like, "AHHH!" and i'm like "AHHH!" and he's like, "AHHH!" so were're both like, "AHHH!" and then he's like, "HEY WANNA HEAR A STORY?" and I'm like,really creeped out, so i'm like, "No!" so then he gets this weird look in his eye, and then he's all like crazy stalker nutcase and stuff and he starts walking toward me, and he's like speaking in this raspy sorta voice and he's all like, "TOUCH IT... TOUCH IT... TOUCH IT..." and I'm lik, backing against the wall, and stuff. And I'm thinking, 'like dude! There can be, like, little kids reading this! Don't burn thier eyeballs out with inappropriateness!' So then I say, " STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! so then I try to hit the guy over the head like a normal person. But he's like, "TOUCH THE UNICORN..." so then I'm like, "Oh, phew. I thought... well, never mind. Ok!" so I went over and touched Mr. Heavy and stuff, and then I was all like, "OW! Mr. Heavy, how could you?!?!" and there's like, this weird mark on my palm, and I'm like, trying to figure out what it is and then the old dude is like, "Come with me" and I'm like, "Why?" and he's like, "Cuz the big voice said so!" and i'm like, "Who's that?" and then the sky opens up and this big voice is all like, "That would be me." so I'm like, "I'm not coming. You're scary strngers!" and then a cucumber fell from the sky and landed on my head and stuffs and stuffs and I got KOed.

I laughed so hard writing the journal. Hope everyone else did too! Please comment nice things about this story so I will have the confidence to keep writing!

PULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

And Yes, i just said ' Pulswease'. Get over It!