-Gomen nasai! I know I said I would put up chapter 2 last week, but I got lazy busy. Here's chaptah 2!
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"Mello-jello-yello-bellow-hello-cello-mellow-"
"MATT!"
"What?"
"Stop it!"
"Okay."
"Good."
"…Mello-jello-yello-bellow-"
"Just. Stop. Now."
"…Mello."
"Argh!"
You can tell I'm bored outta my mind cuz I resorted to annoying Mello, Which is getting dangerous by the minute. "Mell, I'm going to Near's."
"Omg, don't tell me. You're going to play Mario Party again!"
"Nope. YuGiOh."
"…That game got old years ago."
"Try telling that to Near. He's in obsession mode again."
"Oh boy. He's like a dang otaku. What's the damage to his sanity this time?"
"He dyed his hair red, yellow, and black, made it spiky, uses duels to settle his problems, and believes in the heart of the cards."
". . ."
"You should see his hair, man…he looks like Sonic the Hedgehog and a TeleTubby's love child."
"Must you relate everything to tv or video games?"
"No!"
"Be honest."
"…Yes…"
After that amusing chat, I made my way to Near's room.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
The game master opened the door.
"You're still avoiding it, aren't you?" He asked, his voice devoid of emotion. (As always) He could've been the poster boy for emo albinos, if it wasn't for his ridiculous hair.
"Avoiding what?"
"The Sims."
"..How'd you know about that?"
"Well, these past two months you've been saving like crazy. Therefore, I deducted that you were saving for a new game because your favourite smokes don't cost $22.91. Gathering information from my spies, I found out you were saving for The Sims."
"Well Mr.Smartie, how didja know I was avoiding it?"
"Heart of the cards, my friend. Heart of the cards…"
He led me to the video games and cards section of his toy-crazed room. I swear, everytime I step into his room, I trip. At least once. So far, my record for tripping in one visit is 37. (We were having a sleepover with Mello.)
Sure enough, as soon as Near turns his back on me to open his sacred YuGiOh deck cabinet, I fall flat on my face. Curse you Tickle Me Elmo!
He hands me my trusty deck and turns around to find his. TRIP! This time, I was K.O.'d by My Little Pony. As soon as I get up, he hands me his deck to shuffle and turns to search inside the cabinet for the duelling mat. TRIP!
(Sigh) I've been defeated by…a Kumagoro! WTF!
"So Matt…"
"Hmm?"
"Y'know, acceptance is the 1st step to recovery."
"Is this about The Sims?"
"Yes. If you really want to finish that game, you've got to accept your fear of Sim death."
"…Technically, you can't really finish the game…besides, L never got over his fear of Sim death, and look at him! He's a successful-"
"Loser."
"…What?"
"L's a loser. He's 25, looks like a frog-monkey, and gets killed in the manga by his crush."
"(gasp) L dies in Deathnote? I haven't got farther than volume 2…"
"Yup. You die too."
"GASPAGE!"
"Don't worry, you're safe in this fanfic." He places his own deck on the mat and begins to draw cards. I do the same. "That's a relief."
"Look, don't you wish to be more successful?"
"Well yeah, but not at the risk of getting traumatized, y'know?"
Near lays down a face-down and 3 magic/trap cards. When he's done, he looks up and glares at me. "That's not the point. A true gamer does anything to win a game." Dayum, I HATE this kid. Ever since he found out I adore video games, he constantly brings that "true gamer" shiz to our disputes.
"FYI Near," I give him my version of the "Mello is mad, you shall be assimilated" glare and attack his facedown with my Dark Elf. "I AM a true gamer."
…Ironically enough, I'm forced to eat my words when he beats me in two turns.
"You were saying Matt?" He flashes his trademark "Near is numero uno!" smirk.
I'll K.O. the guy who says Mello is the only one who hates Near.
A few hours after that brief chat with Near, I find myself in front of my room, knocking. (In case Mello was inside. Last time, I just waltzed in and he kicked my arse.) The door opens. Mello glares at me. "Oh, it's you." My door slams.
"Hey!" I began to bang on the door. Heh heh. Bang. "Need I remind you this is MY room!"
"Don't be selfish!" Mello retorted, his voice muffled by the door.
"Are you doing something important? (Blushes) Is there a girl in there?"
"What! No!"
"…Is there a boy in there?"
"You're weird."
"I'm weird? This coming from the chocoholic extraordinaire. Was Willy Wonka your mom?"
For about half an hour, me and Mello had a "Who's Weirder" battle with only a door separating us from the other's throats. Luckily, I came to my senses.
"Mello?"
"Yeah?"
"Wtf were we arguing about?"
"I have absolutely no idea."
I snickered, then I took out my key. I unlocked the door, and walked in. My blonde friend was sitting in my uber comfy wheelie chair, staring at the computer screen, choco bar in mouth. For some bizarre reason, the chocolate doesn't muffle his voice. Has he mastered ventriloquism? Note to self: find out…
I stood behind him, studying the screen. "Anime Sims Skins- free if you win?" I read out, confused. "What's a Sim Skin?"
The chocoholic rolled his eyes at me. "Even Roger knows what a Sim skin is, ya lame-o."
I hold my hands out in defence. "Don't be snooty, booty. Just tell me, so I won't be ignorant no longer."
"A skin is a…body design kinda, that you can download as a character. Think of it as a permanent body suit your Sim can wear."
"(Gasp) You mean I can change the way my family looks? Yay!"
"(Eye roll) You dinghead. You can't change the skin of an already made Sim."
"Ahh…wait, why do you know so much about this game?"
Mello's demon-like eyes took on a shojo sparkly. "Because L-sama played it! It made his eyes so kawaii, desu ne?"
Oh jap-challenged Mello-chan. When will you see that I'm far more superior than L? Video game obsessed chain smoker clearly beats sugar-obsessed, slouchy, footwearphobic, and diabetes-defying insomniac!
"Uh Matt? You're zoning out again…"
"Huh? Oh sorry man."
"Anyway, I'm still trying to win the game so I can gain access to the site."
Need help?"
"Nope!" Mello made a determined face. "I'm gonna win the site's URL and get the free anime skins!" He made a fist and held it to his heart.
"…Mommy wow! Mello's a cheesehead now!"
The wannabe L let out an aggravated sigh and massaged his forehead. "I hate you."
"Lol, I know."
I took a nap after that, for…I dunno 2-2 ½ hours? Anyway, when I woke up the first thing I saw was my dear Mello looking at the computer screen with deep concentration, his left hand's digits moving across the keyboard, his right hand controlling the mouse. To the untrained eye, he looks like an experienced computer junkie. But to Matt the legend? Puh-lease. He's still a n00b. But he has potential…maybe I can train him as my student and I can be his teacher…my mind drifts off to ego-boosting fantasies mainly consisting of Mello-chan calling me master…(drool)
This went on until I realized I was spacing out again. Note to self: stop doing that. Anyway.
I turn my attention back to my BFFL, who hadn't noticed my awakening. Oh well, more fun for me! I creep out, and slowly…
"HEY! What the heck man! I almost won! I hate you! Dang you! Go to heck! Yeah, that's what I said! We're not friends anymore Matt, you dumb brunette you! You owe me big time, weotch!"
He dramatically flipped his golden locks of hair at me, before marching out and slamming the door, his nose high up the whole time.
You guessed it; I had pulled the computer's plug. (And if you didn't guess it, then you shall be mocked by my awesome Matt-ness. Go on. Accept the mocking. You're delaying the inevitable.)
Anyway.
I plug the PC in, and type in the URL of the game. Thank L for my smoking-induced photographic memory; else I wouldn't have remembered which site Mel played on. Oh yeah. Speaking of smoking…I take out a cancer stick and enjoy a few puffs while the game loads.
Let's get cracka lackin'!
…I have no idea what that means, or how it's spelled.
…Don't judge me. I'm not a gangbanger like Mello.
You're still judging me. Stop it. (Glare)
…(becomes emo and starts cuttin' himself while singing Hips Don't Lie.)
"(sobbing) I'm on tonight, b-but my hips don't liiiie…ewah…WAH! Stop judging me you evil fanfic readers you!"
Anyway.
3 minutes later, I finished the game. I can see how an amateur like Mello would've found this game difficult…but it's all about healing your tank on every even numbered turn that ends with 4, with the exception of 44, because that's the turn you have to upgrade your warrior's sword, or he'll- am I rambling again?
"Outloud, yes." Mello remarks as he walks into the room. "And you wonder why no one hangs out with you."
"Actually, I'm more popular than yo-"
"Oh hush, it was a good comeback."
"Whatever, man."
A flashing url popped upon the screen. I clicked on it and grinned at Mello.
"Btw, you're welcome."
"I would've solved it anyway." He sulked, hands on hips. The blonde then pulled out a seat beside me. Where did he get that seat? Oh well…my short attention span can focus on it lat- ooh, is Mello wearing a pink nightgown?
"Is Mello-chan feeling cutesy today?" I ask, in my girliest voice. I imagine my goggles glinted in the tinted glow of the computer screen.
POW.
…Ow.
"Listen man, I'm only wearing this because I feel like it, got it?"
"There's more to this story, isn't there?
"Yeah, it's scary how much I'm leaving out actually."
Anyway, Mello kicked me out of my room, telling me that he can download the skins by himself. He said he was getting some "special" skins. Guess I'll have to wait till next chappie to find out what's so special about them:)
OWARI
Ch.2 Omake...kinda.
Q and A!
Q. Who are Near's spies?
A. Ninjas he hired to spy on all of his enemies. He assigned Team 7 to me.
Q. What's a Kumagoro?
A. A pink, talking bunny. It's probably number one on every yaoi fangirl (and Mello's) wishlist.
Q. Are you gay for Mello?
A. What do you mean? How can I be gay? Mello's clearly a girl!
Q. Mello in a dress...(drool)
A. Hey! That's not a question!
Q. Any tips for gamers?
A. Yep! Always eat the red ones last! And try to limit your gametimeto 4-5 hours a day.
"You're one to talk Mr. 17Hours."
"Shut up Near. Just...yeah."
Next time: Matty and Mello journey to Wall-Mart, and what? A certain Mello-lookalike comes into the story!
Expect the next chapter soon, but for now, a nap...r...and...r...
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