Okay, I seriously thought I wrote many more chapterss.

oh well.

Enjoy.

Now, I felt horrible. I wanted my mom and I wanted my best friend. The tears couldn't stop. Welling up and flowing in long rivers down my face. I locked the windows and the doors and made chicken noodle soup. It really had no proven cure, but it tasted good. My mom emailed me back, asking how today went. I lied to her. She asked if I was alright. I lied about that too. I watched an old movie that was on, Throuoghly Modern Millie. I had long ago decided my beads wouldn't lay straight.

I had probably went through a week's worth of gatorade, I chugged and chugged and chugged the stupid bottles of sugar. It was 10 when I heard a knock at the door, then a knock at the window. It was scary, so I locked myself in a closet, though I was sure it was only Edward.

"Open up." He said in a musical voice.

I stayed silent, not wanting to give away my position.

"Please?"

"I'm sorry."

When I heard a window break I became more scared.

"I'll fix that, Bella." He wasn't talking to anyone.

I really tried, to stay quiet but I couldn't bring myself to do it. A man I hated was breaking into my house. I snuck into the kitchen and grabbed a long butcher knife.

"Get out." I told him, he was looking at the family picture my mom had taken in Forks.

"That won't hurt me." He told me calmly.

"But it will hurt me."

I tried toying with him and put the blade up to my neck.

"Get out."

"Don't be rash, Bella."

"I AM NOT BELLA!"

"Bella, please don't."

I held the blade closer.

"Please don't Bella."

He was on his knees, dry sobbing and holding his head. For a minute, I almost thought he wanted her back.

"Leave or I do it."

"Please don't." Edward was out of the room in seconds. He didn't want... well either I or mom to die.

Of course, I never really would cut my own head off. The thought is just too gory.

Just as I turned around, something slid under the door. A CD. My mom's lullaby. The same lullaby that helped me sleep as a child.

It made me think.

Think about everything.

About my mom, and edward. And about my life overall.

It sucked.

I hate my life from about a week ago.

I wanted my mom, and for Edward to rot in hell.

I stripped and put on my pyjamas, grabbed my blankets and curled up on the sofa. I hadn't realized till then there were tons of empty gatorade bottles, juice boxes and fruitsnack wrappers spread on the floor.

After watching a marathon of CSI: Miami, I dragged myself to the confines of my mom's room.

Thats were I went when I was scared. The only difference was, she wasn't there to comfort me.

--

I had woken up in the early morning hours, taking a long hot shower to sooth myself. I threw myself in a vicki's secret PINK sweatsuit and grabbed the money from cabinet for groceries.

I really didn't did much, other than to get out of the house.

I picked up cheerios, peanut butter and a large container of Fruit Juice.

The man at the cash register was checking me out. He took some money off my bill and put his number on my receipt.

"Call me" He said suggestively.

Damn men. Pigs or dogs. I guess you'd have to choose.